The Pretty, The Popular, The Perfect and The Peculiar Girl
by Too Young to Feel This Tired
Summary: I'm a pretty girl, everyone wants to date me, kiss me or fuck me. I'm a popular girl, I have to be fun, a bitch and have all the best parties. I'm a perfect girl, I have to be a good student, daughter, girl, no failure allowed. I'm a peculiar girl, I can't have any friends and I have to be mental. Tell me am I allowed to be just a girl?LeoxOc RaphxOC DonniexOC MikeyxOC,4 OCs
1. The Pretty Girl 01

****The Pretty, The Popular, The Perfect and the Peculiar Girl****

 **Summary:** I'm a pretty girl, everyone wants to date me, kiss me or fuck me. I'm a popular girl, I have to be fun, a bitch and have all the best parties. I'm a perfect girl, I have to be a good student, daughter, girl, no failure allowed. I'm a peculiar girl, I can't have any friends and I have to be mental. Tell me am I allowed to be just a girl?LeoxOc RaphxOC DonniexOC MikeyxOC,4 OCs

 **The Pretty Girl**

* * *

' _Our souls_ already _know each other_ , don't they?' he whispered. 'It's _our bodies_ that are _new_.' – Karen Ross

* * *

She rushed them to the kitchen and locked the door. She wasn't sure what it was, but she didn't feel like parting with her new friend just yet. Friend. That wasn't the word. He was…he wasn't human for sure. She wasn't sure what he was. Yet she didn't feel like screaming, and she surely wasn't disgusted. Since she was a child she was draw to art. Not that she could draw or do anything aside from dancing that would be considered art, but she was always enjoying it and adored it.

He, whoever he was, was for sure a masterpiece. She felt as if it was a dream. Why did she feel so light all of the sudden. Why was he so beautiful? He was truly a work of art as if someone had made him over lonely nights in an old work shop. What a strange thought. Perhaps she was truly going mad.

She stopped in front of him, 'Have we met before?'

Yes, of course. The urge. The strange urge as if they had already stood face to face. She caught in the light of such beauty.

He shook his head. He was so tense. Why was he so afraid? She didn't mean to hurt him. She wouldn't let them in. She wouldn't let anyone else see him if that was what he was afraid of. Couldn't he see how completely astonished she was by him.

She took another step closer, and he quick took a step back. She chuckled. Sure, she wasn't no flower, but she would think someone with such great abs and two katanas would have been the one that was afraid.

She took another step closer slowly biting her lip looking at him. He didn't know what to make out of her. It was an accident that he ran into her. He saw her before walking down the streets at night with other girls or boys, but she didn't see him. She never saw him, so why was she asking. Why was she coming closer? Why was she so beautiful? Why wasn't she screaming and running for the hills? Why did she save him?

He swallowed hard as she stood just a single step away. He could feel her breath on his chest and her warm on his skin. It was intimidating.

'Can I touch you?' she asked, and he barely held back the hysterical chuckle.

 _What does she want? Why is she doing this?_

He wanted her to start screaming. He wanted her to run away because that he understood. He was prepared for that his whole life. Not this! This wasn't right! This was not the way people react! This was not how such beautiful creatures should react when they see something as hideous as him.

'Please,' she whispered, and he barely contained himself. He wasn't sure what he would do, but how can this little creature have such an immediate effect on him. How can her single whisper cause him to want to obey and worship her at her alter?

He has to take everything in him to move his head just then to approve her request. She very gently let the fingers of her right hand trace his large thumb. He didn't dare the move even when he felt her soft skin touch his. He looked up. He couldn't watch her with his heart beating like a drum so loud she could probably hear it. He wasn't a complete stranger to human contact, but that was different that was fighting this was…this was not like anything he ever felt. Why was she doing this?

He couldn't look at her, but he felt her fingers slowly run their course though his hand up to his arm, elbow until suddenly they were gone, and he left out an almost relieved breath until he felt them again on his chest. His chest flinched under her touch, and she briefly leaned away before she looked up at him.

'Is it still okay?'

He swallowed so hard she could see his Adam apple move and smile before she returned to her little examination. It was so beautiful. She felt so liberating knowing that she was touching something no other has ever touched before her.

When she reached the place of his heart, she pressed her palm against it feeling how hard it was beating against her chest. She knew this reaction all too well. She caused it in many boys and men and sometimes even girls. It made her always feel powerful a bit knowing she could do that to them, yet this felt different she felt in control yet she didn't want to be the one that was forcing him like this.

She kept her hand there before she took his large hand and placed it against her small chest behind which her heart was hidden.

He finally looked down at her utterly confused and scared, 'W-what are you doing?' he asked hating the way his voice shook.

'I'm not afraid so please don't be either.'

'I…I'm not afraid,' he told her wanting nothing more than to pulled his hand away. She was looking into his eyes, and he knew she was aware of the lie. She waited. What was she waiting for? Why was she so beautiful? Why wasn't she screaming yet?

She let go of his hand, and he took several steps back making some space between them.

'What's your name?' she asked softly suddenly looking a little bit of sad.

'Leonardo,' he spoke, and he could see her thinking for a moment as if she was trying to remember something. She couldn't because they never met. He saw her, but she never saw him.

'I'm Jay,' she said after a moment and looked back at him, 'Why are you afraid of me?'

'I told you I'm not afraid,' he said this time a bit more certain. With the space between them it was easier to think and act like the warrior he was raised for years to be. It was easier to focus, and refocus from her at least a little bit. Why was she so hypnotic?

'Then why won't you stay close to me?' she asked, and he frowned, 'Why should I?'

She blinked suddenly and the confidence was gone. He was right. Why should he? How was she to ask anything from him? She shouldn't have asked. She shouldn't be here. What was thinking? Why did she touch him? What if he was uncomfortable, and she pressured him.

She nodded, 'I'm sorry. I didn't mean anything bad by it. It's just you're-,' she spoke so softly even though he could her hear he made her wary of what she did now.

'-so beautiful.'

He watched her for a few seconds before he let out a humorless chuckle, 'Right, and you're crazy.'

There it was again. That word. Crazy. You're crazy. That word the doctor used.

 _You wouldn't want people to think you're crazy…_

She didn't let him touch her though. She punched him, and she tore her blouse and screamed. When her mom and the nurse came they all knew the through. But that word. Crazy. She told him about her dreams about her feelings. She told him private thoughts, and he used them and tried to accuse and label her.

He instantly saw the way she shifted when he spoke. He upset her. She looked very hurt, and he felt like hurting himself for being the cause of it. She was so beautiful she should never have to look like that.

'I'm sorry,' he said raising his hands, 'I didn't mean it like that.'

She shook her head before she pointed behind him, 'It's fine. Uh, if you want to go. There's a roof window in the corridor over there. I'll wait a while before i will open the door.'

He watched her feeling incredibly bad. She sounded so unfazed. It was as if he lost her favor, and she was letting him know.

'Again, I apologize. I'm not very used,' he closed his eyes for a moment. _Beautiful women who want to touch me and call me beautiful_ , 'to humans.'

She nodded again this time to pleasant look on her face returning. She walked a bit closer to him, but stopped near the counter and easily hopping up on it, 'So what are you? Mutant, alien, some magical being?'

He chuckled at that a bit, but instantly regretted it as her forehead pulled into a frown, 'I'm not making fun of just that people tend to scream and run or call us monsters not ask that.'

She blinked waiting, but her face softened once more.

He nodded, 'Mutant.'

She suddenly threw off her shoes and pulled her knees closer to her chest, 'So were you always like this or were you human?' He seemed unsure. Could he answer? What about the secret? Sure, the secret pretty much went to hell when he crashed down in front of her, but still. She must have notice his tense because just then she said, 'It's okay, really. I won't tell anyone. I promise. I just never met anyone like you. I'm…fascinated.'

A part of him wanted to laugh at her and call her a liar, but the other part reminded him how she acted when he called her crazy and decided not to comment it.

'No, I was a turtle and then I was a mutant turtle,' he said and looked around. Could he stayed with her and talk? He shouldn't stay this long, but it was just patrol. Maybe just for a little bit. He sat down on the floor opposite from her. Right now. It did look like he was worshiping her. Her sitting higher than him looking down at him.

'What about the katanas then?'

'I was trained by my master.'

She smiled a little bit confused, 'So a samurai or -'

'Ninja.'

'So you're a mutant ninja turtle?'

'And teenager,' he added thinking about Mikey for a moment.

She stayed silence for a moment thinking about something. He wanted to ask her what was going on through her head, but he didn't dare, 'Alright, so you said us…so there are more of mutants like you?' she asked. Oddly the word mutant didn't sound so bad coming from her mouth. Still, she knew there was more of us and that made him tense again. He spent way too much time there.

He got up, 'I have to go.'

She hopped out of the counter as well rushing to him. He stopped and so did she because in that moment she wasn't sure what she was actually planning to do.

'Can we meet again?' she asked, and by the fall of his shoulders she could tell the answer would be a negative.

She nodded to herself and stepped closer to him. This time he was a bit more prepared and kept his ground and heart in bay. She looked down for a moment, 'Can I touch you again?'

However, that made him worried again, but he didn't stop her when she took his hand. She watched how much more green it looked when she was touching it. How can it be that something so simple as a touch of fingers against a skin and spark so much inside people? She linked their fingers together. He should have put an end to it. It would be so much harder to stay away if he didn't but just for once he wanted to know how it would feel.

She looked up from their connected limbs to look into his eyes. He was so much taller than anyone she knew. He was looking down at her. She wanted to touch his face. She wanted to know why was he covering his eyes with a bandana. She wanted to know everything.

She took a deep breath suddenly, and he wondered why did she looked like she was about to do something very brave when all of the sudden her hand was on the back of his neck, and she pulled him down toward her lips.

His hands stopped in the air completely useless as he had no idea what was happening. Why did she kiss him? How could she just kiss him? Who was this girl? Why wasn't she afraid?

Then every question faded away as she moved her lips against. His hands somehow managed to realize their position, and he brought them to her waists. It must have served her as an encouragement because she deepened the kiss. He felt so clumsy like never before in his life as he tried to mimic her motions, but in the end he was always a faster learner than the rest of his brothers so he pretty much handled it by the time they were fully making out with her pressed against the counter and him with his hands around her waists and her pulling him as close as possible.

There was a loud banging on the door that broke them apart breathless with their foreheads together.

'W-why did you do that?' he asked. He had to know.

She just smirked, 'Because I wanted to, and I couldn't let you leave without knowing how it feels to be wanted like that.'

He shivered at her words. How could this one blonde terrify him more than an army of ninjas.

He let her go, 'I have to leave now.'

'See you around,' she said with a sudden determination in her voice.

He shook his head, 'You won't.'

He went to the corridor and opened the window getting out. Yeah, he might think he won't. She knew better. She felt it all in the kiss. He would be back.

She smiled to herself before there was another bang on the door, and she rolled her eyes, 'I'm coming!'


	2. The Pretty Girl 02

**The Pretty Girl**

* * *

'The heart knows when the search is over.'

* * *

Despite that it was a rather cold November night and most of the inhabitants of New York were dressed in warm clothing, he didn't feel bothered by it. The cold was welcome as it made the night air smell fresher than usual.

He watched the city underneath his feet. The city that never sleeps. His city which he and his brothers swore to protect. Millions of people even at this hour walking around in rushed paces home or to their night shifts or to some parties. They always seemed to be in a rush. He wondered if that came with the fact that they stayed long hours in work to have enough to support themselves and their kids and then lacking the time for other things which were always important so they need to hurry.

'Hey, fearless, you listenin'?' asked one of his younger brothers. The truth was he hadn't been listening for a while, ever since Mikey started to crack dad jokes he became obsessed with lately.

'It is hard not to when you are practically yelling,' Leo replied drily before he looked away from the edge of the roof they were currently standing on and walked toward the others. His brothers were currently standing in the middle of the old factory warehouse which was closed for almost two years. It was their usual randezvous spot before and after a parole when they were apart.

Raph rolled his eyes at him before he went to the opposite corner of the roof. Lately the patrols have been a quiet manner which left the hotheaded ninja frustrated. From all of them Raph was the angriest one always looking for an excuse to fight. Although they argued the most Leo understood this need. For Raph fighting was a way to vent, to cope with the fact that they were outsiders and the only interactions they had so far was with each other, their father or April.

He momentary felt a bad taste inside his mouth as he realized it wasn't completely true. Leo had one more interaction apart from those three options. An interaction which involved the most beautiful girl he ever saw and him kissing her in someone's kitchen while she was barefoot. Yeah, he definitely felt warm despite the cold November night in that moment.

The nearby noise caused a welcoming distraction.

He nodded at his brothers, 'Get ready.'

'Oh, I was a born ready,' said Raph and already jumped down. Mikey started to sing _Born Ready_ as he quickly followed him before Leo and Donnie joined.

* * *

'Some people are just nuts. Who doesn't scream when they are being robbed?' asked Raph annoyed as they were turning home. Ever since Donnie installed a special air cleaning device the smell wasn't as bad as it used to. It was a necessary improvement as April started to visit them more often and no matter how many times she would lie it didn't bother her that much her face expressions spoke louder than words.

Mikey looked really confused the whole way back, 'It was weird. She didn't even scream when she saw me.'

Raph hit Mikey over the head, 'Which was another stupid thing. You can't just go show yourself like that. Hidden in the shadows, remember? You are lucky she didn't scream and draw attention to you. We would have been toast.'

Mikey brushed the back of his head where Raph hit him and their conversation continued. Another girl who didn't scream when she saw us. It seemed to be becoming a new thing.

As we took care of the guy who tried to take this non-screamer's bag, Mikey foolishly went to return it. Leo couldn't see pass him but by Mikey's words she just accepted the bag and stared at him gratefully.

'She touched her chin,' said the youngest one, 'that's it.'

Donnie who was silent for the most part with his head no doubt in his inventions again looked over at Mikey, 'Was it something like this?'

He mimicked a gesture of touching his chin with his palm as if he was sending someone a kiss.

'Yes!' cried Mikey excited, 'Does it mean anything?'

'It's _thank you_ in ASL,' replied his brother.

'ASL?'

'American sign language, Mikey,' Leo patiently explained. Their youngest brother was often just that. Their youngest brother. Never mind their upraising and everyday life Mikey was for the most part careless as a child often blind to the negative and cons of their lives. Leo had to wonder if it wasn't the reason why they often loved their youngest brother the most. Despite Raph always getting annoyed with him, he would defend him against anyone who would say or do anything bad to him and although he often caused damage to Donnie's devices he would never hold it against him for too long. No one could.

'So that is why she wasn't screaming?' asked Mikey since it suddenly made far more sense.

They stayed up for a little while talking about the deaf girl before eventually all of them went to bed. Leonardo wasn't looking forward to it. Since that night he accidentally ended up trapped in a house full of people, his days (since they lived at night) were haunted by blondes with soft lips and deep blue eyes.

It took everything in him not to follow her that night. He was lucky he caught a sign of some disturbance not far or he would have surely waited for her and followed her home. By the time he got back the party the blonde was nowhere to be found.

'Rest well, my son,' he heard his father tell him as he was also on his way to his room. Leo pressed his lips together wondering if perhaps his father somehow knew what was on his mind. He was a skilled and wise Master after all.

Eventually he managed to nod and enter his room without giving himself away. His room much like the rooms of his brothers were filled with things they found on their searches outsides or in the sewers when they were young. One man's trash is another man's treasure after all. It caused him to feel unworthy once again. He touched her with his hands. His hands which not only weren't human but also lived in the sewer surrounded by garbage. He didn't deserve what she gave him so freely without a doubt.

 _'I couldn't let you leave without knowing how it feels to be wanted like that.'_

Those words will haunt him until his last dying breath.

He chuckled like a maniac. Wanted by a girl who looked like a goddess. Him of all the monsters.

As expected he once again dreamed about the girl with the name of blue bird. Oddly as he remember how she took off her shoes and pulled her knees toward her chest, it seemed fitting.

 _Jay_

* * *

She opened her eyes and sat up on her bed. She thought she heard someone call her name, but it must have been a dream or her imagination. The sun was coming up.

She swung her feet of the bed and barefoot walked to her kitchen and poured herself a glass of water. She was restless for weeks now and it was all _his_ fault.

It had been weeks since she met him. She remembered that first night. She didn't wait for the end of the party. Her classmates begged her to stay. One of the boys even blocked her way, but she got out anyway and then practically danced home.

She couldn't stop smiling or thinking about him that night. What the hell was it? She kissed him, and gosh she kissed so many before but no one like that. When he put his arms around her and kissed her back…She was lying in her bed homesick for those arms. Why was it? How could it be that those few moments they shared linked her to him so deeply and profoundly? She couldn't find the answer in the timid light of a sunrise of her room feeling and hearing her heart's echoes. It was insane. She was never like this. She was never this schoolgirl crazy about anyone. She was always the one who was unfazed. Always the cold ice queen, the pretty girl, who no guy could get under her skin. Yet…that night everything changed with his ocean deep blue eyes.

She cursed herself and wondered if he would seek her out. She hoped the kiss would have been a deal breaker for his hesitation, but she couldn't be too sure. It has been weeks since Nicole's party and nothing happened. She wondered about it. Since he was so bothered by his looks it was clear he didn't come out in the day light. Maybe she should spend more time out at night. It wasn't like she couldn't take care of herself.

And still, it had been weeks and he didn't come. She waited and went out for parties but as much and often as she looked around, she felt this cold feeling inside her, and she just knew that he wasn't around. She couldn't explain it, but she suddenly felt as if the whole world went greyer since then and nothing seemed to hold any color anymore. Everything started and faded with him.

* * *

'Earth to Jay,' she heard from her side as her friend sat down next to her, 'Your head is in the clouds, don't you think?' asked the always cheerful brunette, Carrie.

She shook her head and quickly denied thankful that the class has started. She didn't want to tell her or anyone what happened. It wasn't that she was ashamed of how he looked. Oddly, it was his looks which caught her interest at first, but she was never a sharer. As a child she was carefree and had many friends, she trusted deeply as only a child could. Then she grew up and realized that not everyone who is polite to you and wants to hang out with you is a friend you can share your thoughts, secrets and feelings with. She learned the hard way as her last best friend held her hands above her head and tried to rip her Wonder Woman t-shirt when she was thirteen. She never trusted girl or boy since then. She stopped trusting adults after her last psychologist season, but that was a different story.

She stayed silent for the rest of the day. She wished, no, she craved to see him. Just somewhere, somehow. She wished to know if it was just her. Maybe she got it all wrong. How was she different than those boys who thought they had a right to take her hand, call her sweetheart or try to kiss her just because she was a pretty girl? What right did she have to kiss him? Push him into a corner with all her intruding questions and then expecting him to come back to her?

The right of a pretty girl?

Fuck that.

She was mopping as if she was brokenhearted or something when it was all her fault to begin with.

Cursing herself one more time she promised herself she would stop. She decided that if she didn't get some sort of universal sign, she would stop thinking and daydreaming about him and focus on her life. It was just one kiss. One _earthshattering_ under her feet kiss. They say the heart knows when the search is over, but what if his doesn't feel the same?

'Dude, check out the newest New York vigilantes' post,' she heard as she was walking toward the gym.

'I know pretty sick,' said one boy to another.

It caught her interest instantly and she found herself walking toward them, 'Hi? What are you boys talking about?'

The two freshmen froze in place which wasn't an unusual reaction when she spoke with nice guys. Assholes were always loud and aggressive. Nice guys were the shy and a bit awkward ones.

'Uh, hi, Jay,' said one of them, but she couldn't honestly remember who he was, 'We were just checking the new post on New York's vigilantes. It's this website where someone writes about the secret vigilantes of New York. The ones that protect the city. People often post their own stories about their rescues. A new post was written today,' he said and handed her the phone his hand shaking a bit.

She heard of the vigilantes. Everyone had. Someone was running around New York City helping out people. No one ever saw them, but by the description they were some sort of soldiers in large and heavy combat uniforms.

'Are these posts wrote by one person?' she asked the boys and they instantly nodded, 'Yeah, anyone can send their story through mail and the administrator checks it out, edits it and posts if it is worth posting,' explained the one who handed her the phone looking proud of himself that he actually knew something which interested her. It happened a lot that boys raced with each other to catch her interest.

If that wasn't a sign, she didn't know what was.

She handed the phone back to him, 'Thanks, Conner. It was helpful.'

She even gave him a smile before she walked to the gym.

'Hi, Jay,' she head by her side and watched a petite redhead walked toward her, 'The tryouts for the team are this Friday. We could really use your help.'

She looked down from her face to the flayer she was handing her before she looked back up at her, 'I really don't see myself as a cheerleader.' Not to mention she was checked out enough times even without wearing a short blue skirt.

'Well, I think you would look great in blue,' replied the redhead and Jay looked at her. She knew the cheer-captain, Kim, was a very involved in everything kind of girl. A perfect girl if you liked. The girl who was the captain of the cheerleaders, class president and on an honor roll. The girl who was friends and nice to everyone and who everyone adored and trusted to do everything perfectly. The girl who never handed an assignment late, who always made sure all the school events were flawless, dated the nicest senior boy imaginable who was destined to be the next senator if you believed everything you heard, as well as always showed up home before curfew. _The perfect girl._

Jay decided that if she wanted her off her back she had to take the flyer with a fake promise to think about it. She at least waited until the redhead was out of her sight before she threw it into her bag wrinkled.

* * *

She spent the rest of her day surfing net for anything she could find about the vigilantes of NY. Most of the useful things she found were on the site the boys told her about. She found stories dated back two years ago when the site first appeared. There were several stories with similar surroundings about the vigilantes always keeping their appearance in the shadows although many claimed that they looked larger than average people and wore some sort of specially designed suits. It was the only logical explanation if you didn't see one up close as she did. If you didn't reach out and touch one of them, feel his skin, his head against your palm.

She opened her eyes only to find herself daydreaming in an empty library again. She quickly gathered her things and rushed home. It took her a while to get to her neighborhood. Her mother never liked when she was walking home alone, but she didn't mind. Not to mention her mom sort of didn't care lately. She got used to the weird noises, whistling and kissing sounds even if they made her feel uncomfortable and she felt like puking from time to time.

'Hey, pretty girl, going home?' asked a man on the street as she walked pass him. She didn't even look his way. Ignoring the question, but not increasing her pace. She didn't want to let it get to her.

'Come on, let me walk with you for a while,' she heard him call and then his footsteps as he was walking after her.

'Preetty girl,' he sang and she had to close her eyes to keep herself from engaging in anyway which could only make things worse.

'You're no fun,' he called after her one last time before he apparently stopped.

She couldn't contain the relieved sigh.

She was a pretty so why should she complain about the attention? Why should she be bother by it? She didn't ask for it, but she was a pretty girl, so she had to deal with people wanting to look and touch. She couldn't complain about it. It just was the way pretty girls were sometimes.

She remembered how a cop once told her.

 _Can you blame him? I mean look at you, such a pretty girl._

She started to hate those words. She wanted to grab them from his tongue and show them into a trash can and set it on fire so no one would ever call her a-

'Hi, pretty girl!' said someone as he grabbed her elbow and spun her around to look at him, 'Aren't you a sweet little thing?'

She didn't know if it was the same guy or not but she had enough, 'Not really.' He probably didn't even know what hit him when she kicked him and turned around. She heard him cry out in pain, but this time she started to full on run. She didn't feel like letting some guy know where she lived. She quickly rushed home checking a few times if she wasn't followed before she took the two-three steps at a time to their apartments on the third floor. It was once she was safely behind her closed apartment doors and locked that she truly felt safe.

She pressed her forehead against the door for a moment before she went to undress herself. She didn't feel like doing anything apart from more research. She made herself some dinner since her mom wasn't home again before she went to bed and turned on her phone to read more posts and articles.

At one point she began to doze off. It was probably from the stress of the situation she had just faced and as he clock told her the late hour it was. Her mom still hadn't returned home. No surprise. Things had been bad between them lately. Her mom thought it was her fault her last boyfriend try to kiss her on the after her got drunk on Halloween while she couldn't understand why her mom wouldn't take her side like she always did? She never asked for any of the things that happened. She never asked for anything. It just kept on happening.

She turned off her phone and covered herself with her comforter. She felt so good in the moment. Finally under the covers feeling tired enough to sleep without thinking about him for once.

When she heard the soft hit of someone's feet outside her fire-escape ladder she was instantly up again. She didn't dare to move as as she knew for sure that there was someone outside her window looking inside.

The window was closed and locked, but she wasn't afraid. Somehow, she knew she didn't have to be afraid. She felt sometimes else entirely. She was thrilled. Thrilled the way she hasn't been for weeks since that night.

She instantly threw her covers of her and ran toward the window nearly crashing into it as she unlocked and opened the rusty thing and quickly looked out.

' _Leonardo_ ,' she called out, and his eyes widened in utter shock that she opened the window in the first place while he was now frozen sitting on the rail at her fire escape ladder.

He opened his mouth clearly still surprised before he breathed out his first word to her since the weeks of separation, ' _Jay_.'

* * *

 **A.N: So after months chapter 2 is here. Sorry it took so many ages, and well might be a bit weird.**


	3. The Pretty Girl 03

**The Pretty Girl**

* * *

'It takes both sides to build a bridge' – Frederick Neal

* * *

Jay was always told as a child that she was a stubborn girl. Her mother would often tell her that no one would like such a stubborn girl and that she couldn't always have what she wanted. She got it. She understood that you don't always get what you want or hope even if you want it bad or work for it. It was just that people around her didn't seem to understand that if she couldn't have what she wanted she wanted nothing at all. Her mother found it childish stubborn, but in Jay's logic it made perfect sense. Why should you satisfy yourself with something you do not want in the first place, just because you can't have something you actually do want?

Looking at Leonardo right now as he was sitting on her fire escape in the middle of the night in November looking like a damn masterpiece she wanted to capture on paper, she knew that if it wasn't him, she wouldn't want anyone else.

'Are you actually planning to come in?' she asked stepping from one foot to another. The floor felt cold in the middle of the night. 'I doubt my neighbors will appreciate a giant turtle on the fire escape,' she said her heart beating inside her chest from excitement chasing away her exhaustion from earlier completely.

He swallowed unsure. Why was this girl always making him so sweaty and terrified? He fought ninjas and monsters and villains yet one blonde made him feel incredibly small and defenseless.

He had no idea what to do about her. He didn't plan for her to see him let alone open the damn window and invite him in.

Leo gripped the ladder he was currently sitting on as if it would help him keep in place and not go inside, 'I can't.'

She frowned a bit knowing that it wasn't completely true. She could see it behind his eyes which she could see behind the bandana as well. It wouldn't be too different than he was now. It was just a piece of fabric which was covering minimum of his face, yet it still felt like he was hidden.

'Do you want me to come outside?' she asked slowly, but he quickly shook his head, 'No, I have to go.'

She grabbed his wrist before he could even blink surprising him a bit. Gosh, her hands were so soft. It brought him back to the kitchen where she examined his arm and chest when they first met letting her delicate fingers run through his body structure. Her skin felt the same, and he felt himself get captured by the touch again. It was not good.

'Promise me you will come back tomorrow then,' she said firmly, and he felt like a canary caught by a cat because with the way she looked at him he might actually do as she requested. Who was she? How could she just ask this of him? To come tomorrow like he was some boy she met in the library. Like he was human, like this was normal, ordinary. Did she often ask mutants to come to her room in the night? She was stunning, and the way she kissed him. He didn't want to think too much about it, but he could tell, it wasn't her first kiss, she wasn't new in these things. She had the upper hand, so maybe it was ordinary for her to ask boys to come to her room, but he wasn't a boy. No, he was not a boy at all. He was a mutant. He was different, ugly by human beauty standards, and yet she didn't seem to mind, she seemed to be fascinated by him, liked his different look. It confused him to no end.

'Please, come tomorrow…I really want you to come,' she said her voice shaking a bit as she realized that he was going to deny her.

'Why do you want me to come?' he asked seeing her vulnerable state and knowing that the tables had turned. Still, he couldn't come. There were too many risks, too many cons…wait did that mean he actually wanted and needed excuses and reason not to come?

She licked her lips, 'Because I waited for you for weeks…'

That shocked him more than just a bit. She sounded hurt, like she was expecting him to come and he let her down by not coming.

'I never…,' she swallowed a bit hard before she finished, 'I never felt the way I did with you in that Nicole's kitchen…even just talking,' she admitted and he swore she has to be some sort of witch because she completely wrapped him around her little finger.

He found himself nodded even if he still wasn't convinced. He really needed to go now, 'Tomorrow. I'll come back tomorrow. I promise, Jay.'

Why would he promise it? Why would he do that if he couldn't deliver it? He couldn't come….he couldn't.

Jay's thoughts were completely different to Leo's. She never thought she could love her name more than when he said it. She used to hate her name as a little girl. Kids made fun of her saying it was too boyish. Now she adored it.

She let go of his hand and smiled at him before she nodded, 'Till tomorrow, Leonardo.'

He found it incredibly hard to leave her right then and there, but he nodded to himself and actually jumped down the fire escape. Jay let out a startled gasp before she watched him land down with ease and then disappear into the shadows of the alley below.

* * *

He was a fool. He was such an idiot. He was insane.

Those were the only thoughts on his mind as he returned from the parole. He and Mikey stopped a robbery as they met up before the end of their parole. He wasn't sure what Raph and Donnie were doing, but in that moment he really couldn't seem to find it in him to listen to their night experience. He couldn't believe he had gone after Jay.

It happened at the beginning of his patrol. Donnie pointed out some struggle at the street, and he froze for a smallest of moments when he recognized the blonde hair.

'Poor thing,' he heard his brother say caringly before they saw Jay taking care of herself and leaving. He felt two things then. He felt anger toward the man who tried to assault her, and proud for Jay to handling the situation the way she did. Despite his better judgment he convinced himself that he should make sure the guy didn't follow her, following her himself. He ditched Donnie, who wanted to leave as well. Standing hidden on the opposite roof, he watched as Jay entered the building. Several minutes later a light came on in one of the rooms on the third floor, which Leo assumed was Jay's. He didn't stay long but watched her put her bag away and then start to change which was when he decided he needed to leave. She deserved the privacy.

He didn't know why he returned again or came closer. He shouldn't have, but he couldn't help it. It was almost magnetic between them. Before he knew what he was doing he found himself at her fire escape, and then she opened the stupid window and asking him to come. She asked him to come, and he like an idiot agreed, promised her even. He had to come now. He was a man of his honor, and he said he would was such an idiot, an idiot who was going to come again and talk to her, and things would end badly. Badly because he didn't know how to deal with humans, pretty girls even less. Badly because in the end something would happen and she would end up hurt or his family would. He was sure of it.

He was so screwed right now.

'Is everything alright, my son?' asked his father as he was about to go into his room. Again with the same concern. He knew. He had to. He was Master Splinter, he always knew everything even before they told him. It was one thing, he could be sure of his Master's wisdom.

* * *

When Jay woke up in the morning, she couldn't really tell for a few moments if it was real or a dream. Maybe she just made it all up, but it felt too real. She felt too good for it to be a dream.

Smiling like a maniac, she put on her clothes and got ready to school. She never paid extra attention to her clothes or hair, but that morning she actually styled her hair a bit and put on a leggings and skirt. A skirt. God, she was turning into such a _girl_ about this whole thing. She figured she looked nice enough which helped her to feel good about herself. She knew it was mostly because of Leonardo, but it was something. She didn't usually dress like this. This was too girly, too revealing, too like someone who wanted attention, but today she felt so good about herself she just didn't care today.

She went to the kitchen only to find her mom already up and dressed for work, 'Good morning.'

She went to the fridge and got herself some juicy.

Her mom was a pretty woman herself, even if she was forty now. She often went to the gym and spent a lot of time and money on her hair and cosmetics. She put a lot of effort into how she looked, but Jay understood it. She worked in a competitive environment in the marketing. When she was younger she worked as a flight attendant. Jay suspected someone told her she was getting older and she couldn't do it forever which was why she quit. Charlotte always seemed so confident which was what Jay admired in her, but it might have been all an act sometimes. True be told she acted often as well.

Still she was beautiful by Jay's opinion. Tall, fit, with blonde hair a shade lighter than Jay's and green eyes. She looked confided which draw men toward her like flies. Men always looked at them whenever they went somewhere together even when Jay was a kid. They always talked to them and tried to get their attentions. They brought gifs often still and she saw how proud almost Charlotte looked when men with younger women still paid attention to her. Maybe it was the reason she was so hurt and upset about what Michael did or try to do. He picked her over Charlotte, her own daughter.

Her mom gave her a side look before she frowned a bit, 'That's what you are wearing to school? Are you sure it's appropriate? It's not summer, Jay.'

She almost chocked on the glass of juicy she was currently drinking. Thing had been weird since Michael her last boyfriend left, but this was just too cruel. Plus, she was the one talking, she always wore shirts and blouses. Nothing too indecent but still teasing.

Jay pushed the shock from the question away before she looked down at her clothes, 'It's just clothes, mom, and they're not that special.'

'To you maybe, but to the guys? They might think shirt and tops like that are inviting for something more,' said her mom. She didn't sound cruel or bitter or like she was doing it on purpose, but no one said something like that, and not want to hurt the other person.

Jay swallowed. She knew what this was all about. Her mother's ex-boyfriend got drunk and tried to kiss her one night.

'That shouldn't be my problem but theirs. I'm not inviting them to anything, mom,' she said firmly.

Her mom looked at the shirt one more time making Jay want to hid behind the fridge door, 'Whatever suits you, Jay.'

She walked up to her and kissed the teen on her cheek. The kiss felt cold and there was no affection in it.

Once her mom left the kitchen, Jay put the glass into the sink. She took a hold of the sink really tightly for a few moments, before she was sure she wouldn't start crying and then left to go get her things for school.

* * *

She was a nervous mess as if she was going on a date or something. She came home early and cleaned her whole room to look nice. She found it incredibly annoying just how much girly things she possessed despite the fact that she was not a girly girl. Rolling her eyes, she had to hide some things feeling like she had to. She cleaned her room for a few hours realizing that they didn't even set a time or she had no idea what to wear. She didn't want it to look like she put too much into the whole planning, but neither did she want to wear just her pajamas. It felt too embarrassing. After the talk with her mom, she felt kind of bad when she was walking through the streets and school. Some guys stopped by her locker asking her to the newest party as their dates. She ignored them or politely declined depending on how persuasive they were. She decided to go with her jeans and top and a sweater, she blame it on her mom. Some time passed but Leonardo nowhere near so she simply started to do her homework. She didn't have too much of it so she finished relatively quickly and just started to listen to music and kill time on her phone.

When the knock finally came she almost tripped coming out of the bed. She quickly rushed to the window and opened it already knowing it would be him.

'Hi.'

He watched her for a moment. Leo still couldn't believe he actually came. He lied to his brothers that he would leave earlier for the patrol. This, talking to her, lying to his brother, skipping patrol broke every single rule in the book for him. It was almost too much for him, 'Hi.'

She stepped aside and since he didn't want for anyone to see him, he went into the room making sure he wouldn't damage the window frame. He was too large for such a small window but he managed to pull it off anyway. The floor was wooden so it made a crack as his feet hit the ground, but Jay didn't seem too bothered by it as she watched him stunned as if she couldn't believe he actually came either.

He swallowed and walked into the room looking around. Apart from April's apartment, he never entered any other's person room. It wasn't too large or too big and it had nice purple walls. He wondered if it was a girl thing to keep the room spotless, but then he remembered how messy April could be and thought against it. It might have been just a character thing. She had books and papers on the bed, maybe she was studying before he came. She had one big clothes with a mirror on the door and then two small nightstands by the bed. She had a large bookshelf next to her door and a table with a laptop on it, but it looked like she didn't use it often since she even did her homework on her bed instead of the behind a desk.

He looked down back at her. They were silent for a moment just looking at each other absorbing the idea that they were together in her room. It wasn't uncomfortable silence, it was actually very calm even if he felt like he should be freaking out more.

'You have a nice room,' he said finally and she smiled a little bit, 'Thanks. I painted the walls myself it was supposed to be a different color but I messed it up a bit and got purple. I was too lazy to change it.'

He watched her stunned. He didn't know why but even if it was something so trivial as painting the room he wanted to hear her talk about it. He wanted to hear her talk about everything imaginable.

However, Jay seemed to be nervous from her confession since she kept on folding and unfolding her arms. She felt as if she just said something so trivial maybe even annoying even if he didn't look annoyed.

'How was your day?'

He looked at her for a moment wondering if she was somehow making fun of him but she looked very serious and nervous which helped him with gain some confidence, 'Is that what you want to ask me?'

She shrugged her shoulders, 'Why not? We might start with normal things. You can sit down if you want. So this looks less tense.'

He watched her for a moment before he sat down on her floor. She shot him a look, but in the end sat down opposite to him. The floor wasn't too cold and if she was she had a small carpet under the bed.

She pressed her head against the bed feeling herself calmly down. It shouldn't be nervous or weird. It should be calm, 'Do you want to hear about my day first?' she asked looking at him before she smiled calmly. Somehow she was so confident sometimes it caused him always to be the nervous, the reckless one, insecure. He was never like that in a battle or training but here in her little room he felt so incredibly weak. He felt weak looking into her blue eyes as he knew she bewitched him utterly.

She shrugged her shoulders, 'I woke up early and went to school. It was a relatively easy day. No test or anything. I spent it mostly around the people that I knew. Friends. Some of them were looking forward to this party on Saturday. I don't I like parties to be completely honest.'

'You don't?'

She nodded, 'Yeah, it's…I don't drink, or dance mostly so it is just hanging out until someone decides to leave so I can leave too,' she brushed her hair a bit behind her ear nervously. It really made her realize how weird it was. She had a mutant turtle…someone out of a fairy tale or comic book in her room and she was telling him about why she didn't like parties.

He was silent for a moment, before he said.

'I slept for a while and then trained with my Master and brothers,' he said a bit uneasy. Jay hugged her legs, 'Brothers?'

He nodded, 'Three, all younger.'

She chuckled, 'Ah, there it is.'

'What is?'

'You have this whole…leader aura around you,' she said and waved her hand over his form, 'It's like you follow a strict set of rules and stuff.'

He frowned a bit, 'Do you think it is a bad thing?'

She shook her head, 'No. I just noticed it.'

'What about you?' he asked and she shrugged her shoulders, 'Only child…might be why I'm so stubborn and persuasive. I live with my mom. She's probably at work or on a date.'

He watched her for a moment before he nodded, 'It's just the two of you?'

'Yeah, she has boyfriends from time to time, but they never really stick,' she said trying to sound as calm as possible even if she didn't feel like it. She didn't want to talk about her mom. She never wanted to talk about her mom, and her guilty looks and harsh words. She felt like crying every time her mom made a comment about her clothes lately. She didn't, but she wanted to. This morning was brutal.

He blinked at her. He sensed the sudden change in her. She didn't like to talk about her family for some reason. He looked over the room again until he noticed a sheet of paper under her bed, 'You have something there.'

Jay was grateful for the change in the topic so she turned around to look at what he was pointing at.

She found the stupid cheerleading trails sheet Kim gave her the other day. Leo watched a bit amused yet puzzled as the blonde let out an annoyed sound and rolled her blue eyes, 'One of my classmates gave it to me yesterday. It must have fallen out of my bag.'

'Ah, so you are not planning to join the squad?' he asked taking the paper from her to look at it. There were three girls in the front in nice blue uniforms. He definitely could see Jay as one of them. She was blonde, and breathtaking and looked really fit.

'No, that would be a total cliché pretty blonde and a cheerleader,' she said shaking her head, 'I have enough of being objectify everywhere I go just cause I'm pretty.'

He looked at the paper again, 'Yes, I guess people will always care about how you look if you are beautiful or not at all.'

She watched him for a moment. That was what he thought. That he was not beautiful, not pretty. He thought he was hideous or ugly? She didn't think so. She didn't think so at all.

'Tell me, did you think about me these past few weeks?' she dared to ask. He felt his stomach turn into a knot. He didn't want to answer. He felt too embarrassed, but when he look up at her she didn't look confident. It was strange. She always looked so sure of herself, there was just something in that cold blonde appearance which fooled him like that. But once he actually looked at her blue eyes, he saw it. The hesitation, the fear of rejection. It was ridiculous. How could see think she could be rejected? She was gorgeous. She entered his mind and heart. She made him come today risking himself, her, his brothers and father...all her. How could she doubt herself?

He nodded, 'I...thought about you every day.'

The smile she gave him after his finished his sentence was worth everything. It was like the sun came out after a rainy day. It felt like that to him.

He swallowed a bit, and she quickly said, 'I thought about you too. I hoped we would see each other again.'

He felt it again. The shiver in his body, the sweating in his hands, like he should run, not stay there and talk. It felt as if it was too much for him, but he didn't leave. He couldn't leave.

She moved her legs and kneeled in front of him before she sat on her legs, 'Do you feel it too? The...connection?' she asked her voice weak, hesitating even if she looked more composed than him. It was probably just his mind making her look better at it than him. He didn't have confidence when it came to humans. April was an exception, not a rule. Yet, this girl didn't seem to care...she just kept on looking at him like he wasn't a giant ninja turtle in her pretty girly bedroom with purple walls. She looked at him...she touched him...like he was beautiful...she kissed him like she liked him, like he was a masterpiece. He didn't know how to handle that.

'Yes...I think I do.'

She nodded and put her hands on her the floor. He swallowed. He felt like a prey and as if she was a wild cat, a lioness slowly walking toward him on all four. She was going slowly like a predator ready for a kill. Her face seemed composed enough but her eyes gave her away again. He remained still waiting for her. He could stood up and tell her to stop, but he didn't. He wanted to know what would happen if she got close enough, close enough to touch, to feel her breath on his face, to absorb her scent which was already intoxicating surrounding him.

She stopped a little bit in front of him before she sat down again. Even when he was sitting he was still taller.

'What do you think it is?' she asked softly, and he shook his head, 'I don't know.'

'Did any of your brothers ever feel anything like that?' she asked. He didn't know why she lowered her voice, but he did the same, 'I don't know, but I don't think so.'

'You would be able to tell?' she asked, and he thought about it. She was on his mind for weeks and neither of his brothers noticed...Master noticed though. He was sure of it.

'Maybe,' he said, but he wasn't sure. He wasn't sure of anything now.

He waited for her to do something, but she kept on looking at him for a moment as if she was admiring him, no touching this time. He found himself missing it, craving for it a bit.

'I could tell you were near last night,' she mumbled, 'It woke me up.'

He watched her. She was so stunning, yet there was something about her beauty which made him want to feel sad for her. The way she spoke about her life...people in her life. Her room was a nice one, but it felt lonely inside it. She had no pictures lying around, not even her own. She had one mirror on the closet, but since he came she didn't even look into it. Not once, the way he noticed April did when she was around a mirror. She wasn't looking all the time, but she liked to check up if she was looking okay. Jay didn't look over to it once. Last night, she also came home alone, and at the party she was alone enough to find him and help him escape. Her smile was like the sun, but she was cold...she was lonely. He felt it even without touching her. He could sense the loneliness inside her. She craved him, his presence. It was why she asked him to come, not to be able. She could pick anyone, but she picked him. She felt a connection to him, and she wanted more of it. He wanted it as well. He was not alone. Not the way she was. He had a good father and brothers, he was close with. He had a good family, he spend most of his time. He liked spending time with them, and yet he felt lonely as well. Lonely for someone like her in his life. Someone who was as cold as him, yet who set his body on fire and his captured his mind beyond imagination.

As he was sitting on the wooden floor of her room, he realized he was wrong. She might have kissed other boys, and spend time with them, but she didn't take them to her room, not too often at least. The only scent which surrounded hers and a faint scent of another female. He could tell since females had a lot sweeter scent while males are a bit more bitter. It must have been her mother, but that was all. There was no other scent in the room. She had no pictures of her friends around her room or social media. He felt terrible and like a stalker, but actually spend some time looking over her instagram and facebook. She had minimum photos in both and rarely seemed to post anything on her own. If she was in a photo she was usually tagged by someone else. Through the time he came till now, not once did her phone beeped or started to ring. She didn't bring people into her room, or life from what he could tell. Almost the same way, he and his brothers didn't to his, and yet she brought in him making him even more special. And the way she spoke about her mother it was as if they had problems as well.

'Are you lonely, Jay?' he asked and watched her move her eyes to his. Once again they showed the truth before her lips revealed it.

'Yeah. Constantly,' she admitted looking at him for a moment before stood up on her knees to be higher.

He found his left hand on her side to help her with support as she let her fingers trace over his face. His skin was different then hers, yet nice to touch. She didn't hate it. She didn't feel disgusted by it, by his looks, by him.

He heard her heartbeat speed up as her fingers went over his forehead, his cheeks to his lips and then chin. Her eyes remained on the path her fingers were making over his face as if she was leaving some marks behind.

She stopped on his chin before she looked back up at his eyes, 'Your skin is soft.'

'So is yours,' he mumbled back. Their voices were still soft, still tender like they didn't disturb the quiet of her room.

She was so stunning. The blonde hair around her head like a halo even if the only light in the room was from her small desk lamp.

It was then that he realized that quite some time has passed since he came, he needed to go to the patrol. It wouldn't be right, to stay longer. He had a duty to himself, his master, brothers, and his city.

'I need to go now, Jay.'

He said and she nodded, 'Okay.'

'I have...patrols,' he said hesitating for a moment. Once again he revealed something about himself.

She chuckled a bit, 'I know. I saw some videos of you and your brothers.'

So he wasn't the only one who did a little bit of digging.

He made a face, 'Yes, it's not good when people catch us on camera. Most of the footage is bad. It is hard to actually see something, but sometimes people see us and write stories about the encounter.'

'I know, you have your own website,' she said teasing but not in a mean way. He rolled his eyes, 'Don't remind me. My youngest brother thinks it's funny, he feels almost proud about it. Won't shut up about it.'

She giggled, 'Sounds like he is the youngest in more than just the age.'

He nodded thinking about his brother with the orange bandana who was always goofing around.

Jay let go of his jaw letting her fingers stroke it until they fall away and her hand returned to her side.

'Will you come tomorrow, please? I want to see you again.'

He found himself not even wanting to say no anymore. Why not? He came today, and she didn't do anything to make him feel like he never wanted to return. She made him want to stay even. It might end in a total disaster, he was sure it would, but maybe for a while it could be alright. He knew what the smartest thing was, he really did but still...The voice of reason. She didn't feel dangerous in a way that she would tell anyone about him. She told him that much. He felt like he could trust that, trust her. He shouldn't, but he already did. He did since she helped him get out of Nicole's house.

'Will it help you decide if I say I will totally go out looking for you if you don't?' she asked suddenly surprising him. He looked at her, and sort of knew she would.

'So you are basically blackmailing me to come, yes?' he asked slowly, but not like he was upset about it.

She made a grimace, 'If you force me too...yes, absolutely.'

He watched her for a moment before he smiled a little bit, 'I don't think you would be that mean to blackmail me, but I think you would be stubborn enough to come looking for me if I don't come.'

She nodded realizing he was still holding her, 'I can already tell, we will be getting along marvellously.'

He waited for a moment and looked at her, 'Were you really too lazy to change the color?' he asked nodding at the walls.

She smirked a bit, 'Nah, I just liked it more.'

He let her go and started to stood up as did she. She turned toward her bed and picked a piece of paper and a pen quickly scratching something down.

'My number. Just in case.'

She walked him to her window afterwards, 'Same time tomorrow then?'

He turned toward her. God, he was so tall.

'I will try.'

She nodded before she stepped on her toes and kissed him on the cheek only to end up a little off since he was so tall and she didn't use him for support, 'I'll be waiting.'

She put her hands behind her back with her brows raised at him. He felt like she wanted something, she waiting for him to do something. He almost leaned down. He almost leaned down and...

In the end, he forced himself to smile at her, and left, 'Good night, Jay.'

'Good night, Leonardo, see you tomorrow.'

He easily got out of the window and then to the nearest building. He knew Jay watched him at least for a while, but he didn't turn around. He felt like an idiot once again, only for a completely different reason. She didn't kiss him this time. She was waiting for him to do it, and he didn't. He felt like he screwed up another thing tonight.

* * *

Jay watched as Leonardo vanished in the dark of the night on the rooftop at the building opposite from hers for a few moments before she smiled at herself and closed the window behind her, locking it. She couldn't stop smiling like an idiot as she undressed herself and went to bed. She didn't think she would fall asleep that easily tonight. She was even more excited than the night before.

He came.

Leonardo actually came and got to talk to him. She never felt like this before with any other boy, she ever went on a date, and it wasn't even a date. They just...hung out.

She closed her eyes.

She was thrilled.

* * *

He managed to push every thought about Jay away as he and his brothers were finding against some gang members who wanted to burn an old factory down. They managed to save an old guard and the building of course. Even if he ran away screaming afterwards, it was a good night.

He managed to successfully push away all thoughts of Jay until he was in his room ready to sleep. He knew why he didn't lean down. It was because he couldn't. He couldn't kiss her. He knew he wasn't any good in it. Everything he knew how to do right, fighting, cooking, cleaning his room, reading, even walking, he did because he was taught how to do it, and he practised it until he got it right...kissing? He didn't know anything about kissing. His first kiss even if it was wonderful was solely made by Jay, who led him the whole time. He knew if he leaned down it would be clumsy and embarrassing, and he didn't want the kiss to be like that with her at all. She deserved everything to perfect.

He put a pillow over his head and tried to think about the nice things which happened that night. Jay's room, her smile and laugh. He got to talk to her for a while. He revealed some things, but so did she. It didn't feel as terrifying as it did before. His brothers didn't seem to notice any change.

The pillow was put back on its place and he slowly tiptoes from his room to his Master's. He knocked and waited for a response before he went inside.

'Yes, my son,' said his father calmly while meditating as usual. His father always looked like he knew it all, like he could never be shocked or bothered by anything.

'I-I came to tell you something, Master. I don't think you will like it very much.'

Master Splinter opened his eyes and looked Leonardo. He didn't look too alarmed, but he was definitely paying attention to him.

'Speak, Leonardo.'

He swallowed a bit nodding. He knew what his father would tell him, of course, he knew. He knew his father, his Master. He knew he didn't like the idea of them involving with the outside world, even if he came to be a bit more understanding since April joined their little family.

Still...this was big...and different.

'A couple of weeks ago, I've meet someone...a girl, and I felt this...this connection,' he admitted, 'It's like nothing I ever felt before, last night I meet her again and she asked me to meet again, and I did.'

He slowly repeated most of the events which happened between him and Jay even the part about kissing which was very embarrassing to admit. He tried to explain what he felt for the blonde who be barely knew in words, but he found out it was incredibly hard to put words to the crushing feeling he felt whenever he was around the blonde. Once he was done, he felt somehow better. It felt good to tell everything to his father, to be honest with him once again. He knew what would happen now, he would forbid him to speak to the girl, and he would obey because he was a good son, and he didn't want his father to be angry with him or put his brothers in danger...

...and yet he would disobey. He would seek her out still and come talk to her behind their backs again confessing to it. He knew how he felt around the blonde, he knew how many rules he broke by coming to talk to her tonight. He knew he would return.

His father sighed catching his attention, 'Leonardo, if I tell you to stay away from this girl, you will still go to her, won't you?'

He looked down, he already knew the answer to it, 'Yes.'

'Is there a point in telling you to stay away from her then?'

'Not really.'

His father nodded, 'Very well, my son. Then we have a lot to discuss.'


	4. The Pretty Girl 04

**The Pretty Girl**

* * *

 _The people who are meant to be in your life will always gravitate back toward you, no matter how far they wander._

* * *

Leo thought about her as he lied down on the bed. He didn't come to visit her again. It was a busy night. His shoulder felt a bit sore from the hit he got after he felt from the third floor, but other than that it was a relatively good night. Busy but good.

He wondered if what she was doing now. Was she asleep or getting ready to school?

Leo closed his eyes for a moment remembered her fingers stroking his face when she was inches away from him. He wanted her to kiss him again. He wanted to feel her lips again. But more than anything he wanted to talk to her.

He fell asleep for a moment because when he woke up the noises his brothers were making were gone. Pure blissful silence.

He reached for the phone Donnie gave him. He had to fix it after Raph broke it during sparing or so he claimed. He felt like rolling his eyes at the excuse. His brother's tempter was his worst quality. He knew he cared for all of them, but that anger...it ruined him and everything around him.

He stared at the number Jay wrote him two nights ago so much he actually memorized it. He thought about her hair. It was so wild and curly. It was all over her shoulders. He remembered how it flew in the air when she walked on the street.

He texted her. He wasn't even sure what to say so he just went with it.

 _Hi_

It took him a moment to realize that she probably didn't know who he was so he added.

 _It's me, Leo. In case you were wondering._

He felt a bit like an idiot as he wrote it, and the embarrassment grew as she didn't reply. It had to have a logical explanation. It was little over 9 in the morning so she was probably in class and couldn't reply.

Still...it didn't help him to think otherwise and make variety of conspiracy theories of why wasn't she replying. He was about to go meditate to calm down when he got a reply.

 _Hi, sorry, I was in class._

 _Shouldn't you be sleeping? How was your night?_

He let out a soft chuckle. He was such an insecure _idiot_.

 _It was okay. A bit busy. I couldn't come._

 _It's fine as long as you are okay._

He smiled at the phone. He wished he could see her right now. Just for a moment. He wished he could see her beautiful hair and smile.

He closed his eyes before he ran his hand over his face. How is it possible to miss someone who he knew for such a short while?

* * *

Jay walked to her locker. She couldn't help a smile. She texted with that ridiculous man through the whole break. They talked about nothing and yet she kept on rereading the text over and over again.

She got a new notification. Someone uploaded a video with the vigilantes to the site. She could see two of them fighting some gang members. Correction. Two of them were fighting against what looked like ten guys with guns and knives. She felt her heart beating fast as she watched the video.

Someone patted her arm. She looked up only to find Molly Jones looking at her before she nodded at the phone.

Jay looked at it as well, 'Uh, I just like the...vigilantes?' Gosh, could she sound more certain? Or like she was lying.

Molly raised her brows. She knew to girl since she was fifteen. She had a habit of changing her hair to the weirdest colours and wearing beanies. Currently it was light pink.

'I like the new hair,' said the blonde. Molly smiled and signed something. Jay wasn't that good in sign language, but she recognized the sign for good and end.

She looked at the video again. The two turtles managed to kick ass. She looked back at where the pink hair and beanie disappeared. Apparently Molly was a fan as well. She met Molly on English language in Freshman. She came to school and their principal explained to them that she was mute. Most of the people looked at her like she was a total weirdo. Jay thought she did it on purpose at times. A guy once walked up to her and shouted like she was deaf or if she was like that would magically make her hear better if she spoke laugher. She just smiled at him and kept on watching him until he got scared and left. Jay thought it was funny. Freak them out to leave you alone.

Most of the people in school called her a freak. A math teacher once said she was peculiar, she was trying to be rude and decent at the same time. Some started to use that word as way to make fun of her. But it was like she couldn't hear them, like she didn't care at all. Jay admired that.

'Jay, hi,' called a redhead and walked toward her. She forced herself to smile as Kim Sawyer walked to her with another girl. She didn't know her but she was surely on the squad too, 'Hey.'

Jay nodded, 'Hi.'

'So have you thought about joining the squad? It would definitely help us.'

'You never saw me at tryouts how could you know if I was any good.'

'I remember you from dance classes. Come on, just come to the tryouts, please?' asked the redhead. This was the thing about Kim. She wasn't a bitch. She wasn't like other girls in school or on the squad. She was basically a sweetheart. If she was a bitch Jay would have had a much easier time telling her no. Later she would blame it on her good mood because of Leo, but she found herself nodded, 'Okay, I will come on the tryouts.'

Kim chuckled delighted while the other girl looked her up and down. This was definitely going to be fun.

* * *

'I got into the squad,' was the first thing Leo heard when he picked up the phone. He was meditating and he nearly jumped out of his skin as the ringing would cause suspicion in his brothers.

He held his breath listening if his brothers heard anything, but Raph continued to blast the rap music and Mikey continued to laugh and shout as he was playing video games. The fact that he found peace for meditation was seriously an achievement.

He whispered, 'What? Like you're going to be a cheerleader?'

He heard the annoyed sigh, and he couldn't help a chuckle, 'Oh, that sounds nice, will you be wearing a uniform too?'

'Yes.'

He laughed a bit harder, 'Will you show me?'

'Ah, I can even give you a private performance,' she said, and he seriously froze. She was going to be the death of him.

He had to take a shaky breath before he said, 'Just...tell me how it happened, hm?'

Another sighed, 'There's this girl in our school she's the cheerleader captain. She's just so nice I felt bad about shooting her down which is your fault by the way. You caused this by the way. You made me a softy.'

'I made you a softy? And what were you before? Ms. Saving stranger turtles at parties?'

'That was just one turtle. He's kind of special,' she said and added the nicest giggle he ever heard.

'Wau, am I special,' he said and actually kind of felt like that to have a girl like Jay talk to him and want to be with him.

'Are you okay?' she asked suddenly.

'Yeah, why?'

'I saw your new video. It looked intense you and your brother and quite of few bad guys,' she said.

He didn't want to tell her. She sounded upset, 'I'm fine. It doesn't even hurt anymore.'

Silence.

'So...you were hurt,' said Jay slowly.

He nodded, 'Yeah, but it was just a sore shoulder...I promise.'

'If something happened to you I would never know.'

'You would, but nothing is going to happen,' assured her Leo.

'You don't know that...no one does,' she said quietly, and he felt like he wanted to hold her close in that moment. What was she doing to? They spoke for a while, it broke the ice a bit, but he had a feeling she was still thinking about it. He teased her a bit about the whole joining the squad thing. He promised to come visit her tonight.

Leo walked out of his room. Donnie was working on something in his little lab. He managed to create a lot of things on his own from the junk they brought him. It was really amazing how smart the turtle was. He always looked so focused and passionate about his inventions. It made Leo glad that he had something he could give himself so truly into. He started to wonder about their lives now and more importantly their future. Master Splinter told him that he could continue to meet Jay at their own risk. He was risking Jay's life if someone found out they were close as well as he was risking his own and the life of his brothers. It was hard. A very hard choice, but he came to terms with the decision that he couldn't leave Jay alone. Not after he got to know her. He wasn't sure how it would all end, but for now he was certain he wanted to continue to have her in her world, and hoped she wanted him as well. He wasn't sure if she wouldn't realize who he really was and what it meant to be his...friend, but for now she looked like she wanted him in her life as well.

He decided to wait till the end of the week to tell them about Jay. Despite the look Master Splinter have him, he let him have a say in this. He knew his decision to continue to meet Jay was influencing their lives as well, and they had a right to know, but he was sure he knew the outcome. Mikey would want to meet her, Donnie would want to do a background check of her, Raph would call him a traitor and tell him that he sucked as a leader and brother. Basically Raph was the problem.

'Something on your mind, Leo?' asked Donnie not even bothering to raise his eyes from the microscope.

'Not much, what about you?' asked his brother and walked closer. He had most of the time no idea what Donnie was talking about but the boy looked seriously interested and he needed to talk it out sometimes.

'I am working on a new smoke bomb,' said the younger turtle.

'Is that what we need?' asked Leo.

'Hopefully, not.'

They chatted a little bit before Leo went to leave.

'If you want to talk about it,' said Donnie suddenly, 'I'm here. I won't judge.'

Leo stopped in the doorway, 'Why do you think there is something to talk about?'

Donnie shrugged his shoulders, 'I notice things. I can tell something off with you lately...it's not a bad thing actually. You look relaxed and yet stressed out. We're not kids anymore Leo so just tell us.' The way Donnie said it he felt like a parent who was about to tell his kids he was starting to date again after a tragic loss of his wife.

He didn't know what to say so he try to get Donnie to talk more, 'Why do you think?'

'I don't know,' he shrugged his shoulder, 'Mikey thinks you're in love.'

'What?'

Okay, he had no idea how to react to that.

'You're happy yet stressed out like how media shows a person in love.'

Donnie looked back down to the microscope.

'What do you think?'

'I don't know, but I'm sure you will tell us when you can.'

It left a bad taste inside him mouth. It was like he was somehow hurting his brother. He felt seriously bad about it. Yet, he found himself tongue tied.

He walked out of the room feeling like a traitor.

* * *

The black uniform was lying on Jay's bed. It was so short. She felt weird about dancing in front of the people in the gym on the tryouts especially the boys who were ogling her and the rest of the girls. She didn't even look their way. She was too embarrassed. She heard them whistles once, she still wouldn't look up. One of the guys got down from the bleachers when she went to drink some water.

'Hey, Jay, looking good.'

She ignored him and returned back to the other girls.

She and two other girls got in.

One of them Annie, hugged her when they told them they got the spot. She was so excited. Jay knew she used to be bullied about her weight and lost over 30 pounds since the beginning of the new school year. She hugged her back she looked so happy.

Kim looked excited too. The redhead took her hands, 'I'm so looking forward to have you on the team, Jay.' She was all smiles and giggles. She would think she was being insincere, but Kim was just like that. A sweetheart. Someone who everyone had to like.

'Yeah, hope I won't quit after the first day.'

'No, it will be awesome,' said Kim nodding.

Matt her boyfriend walked up to her and hugged her over the shoulders, 'Of course it will with the best captain in the world,' he said and kissed her forehead. Kim smiled at him and they both looked Jay. She would think such a gesture was naive. People didn't really love each other like that. It was all a front, but with Leo...she didn't kiss him the last time he left her room, she was waiting for him to make to move. She didn't want him to say what he want. They were connected. That much she knew. She doubted he ever felt like this, just as she never felt it before. If he wanted to be with her the way she did with him, he had to prove too.

'Can't wait to see you before the next game, Jay,' said Matt and winked at her.

Jay nodded but didn't return the smile.

Now looking at the uniform, she was even more unsure about it. She felt good while dancing and actually achieving something even if she didn't ask for it, but now. The uniform look alien to her.

She smiled when she felt the familiar sensation.

'What's the color?'

'Black like my soul.'

Leo chuckled as his feet hit the floor. He was so huge, how could he move so quietly? Without a trace? Without a sound?

He walked toward her as she turned around smiling at him, 'Hi.'

'Hi.'

'I missed you. You didn't show up last night,' she told him and looked back at the uniform. She was turning into a totally sap.

'I know, I'm sorry. I had some things to deal with. I might not show up for a few days so I wanted to come today,' he said calmly.

She titled her head, 'Something happened?'

'No, just...I think I got a bit sloppy lately and I should spend some time with my family. I will tell them...about you tomorrow.'

Jay nodded slowly realizing what he meant. He will tell him family about her. It meant that seriously bad things could happen. 'Okay.'

Would they tell him not to see her again? Would he listen? She never had brothers, she didn't know what it meant to have them. Three brothers and a father who Leo was very close with. If they told him to let her go...would he? Would she blame him?

'I already told my father...he was surprisingly not upset,' he surprised her. It made her a bit relieved for a moment. At least one person less to worry about for now.

Jay sat down on the bed, 'Well, that's a good thing, right?'

Leo sat down as well carefully. The bed cracked a bit but didn't remain solid. They were sitting opposite from each other closer than last time. It was as if things shifted between them since last time.

'Yes, but I was expecting an outburst. I'm a bit suspicious,' he confessed. He honestly wasn't sure what Master Splinter was thinking about. He should be glad he was okay with him meeting up with Jay, but he had a feeling it was like the quiet before the storm.

Jay hugged her legs closer, 'Do you think your brothers will be upset?'

'Maybe Raph. The others will be okay eventually, or maybe...I don't know,' confessed Leo. He really didn't know anymore. He replayed the conversation with Donnie. His younger brother knew something. He was smart enough to, Mikey too. He told Donnie he thought he was in love. He watched as Jay was looking at him with her hair titled to the side. He carefully lifted his hand and stroked her curly hair a bit. It bounced back when he pulled it and let go.

She brushed her hair before she sat up and touched his hand, 'Am I trouble to you?'

He moved his hand so they were holding hands, 'No, don't worry about it. I'm okay. You're not a trouble or problem or anything like that. You're...Jay.'

She chuckled her curls bouncing a bit, 'Will you show me your winning dance?'

'Hell no,' she laughed and pulled her hand away, 'I'm quitting tomorrow or something. I can't be a blonde cheerleader that's like the worse cliché ever.'

He laughed, 'True, but I think you'll beat it. You're not like anyone I know.'

She smiled softly before she let her finger stroke her hand, 'You're not like anyone I know either.'

They watched each other for a while. It was like the whole world faded away. He asked her about school, about her morning. It was like there was always something to tell him. She told him about her classmate who caught her watching the video. He told her his brother Mikey was also rewatching the video constantly. He told her all about his day and she told him about hers.

'How is the shoulder? Did it hurt?'

'It wasn't too bad,' he lied and she moved closer letting her fingers run through his shoulder softly. It was like she was tickling him, 'What happened?'

'Someone got lucky.'

She looked at him and he took her hand holding it for a while before he checked her alarm clock. It was time for him to leave.

He left soon afterwards. Once again she hugged him around the torso before he left but didn't do anything else. He was so strong. She liked touching him, his skin, it felt the same and yet different. Once again she didn't kiss him. He watched her carefully. She had a smile on her face like she was testing him. Like right now again it was all in his hands the kiss or not.

She watched him leave. He was quick and quiet. She was impressed as always. She got a new Facebook message. She walked toward her computer and checked it.

Molly Jones sent her a message. Jay wasn't even sure when did she added her to her friends. She sent her a link to the website of the Vigilantes of New York. There was a new article there already.

She wrote her a thanks, but felt sort of lonely there. They never shared a message before. Jay never had problem with her...maybe it wouldn't be so bad to start.

 ** _What are you up to tonight?_**

 _Playing Fortnite with some friends. You?_

 ** _Not sure yet. Probably go over some stuff and chill._**

 _Disappointing. And I here I thought pretty girls were cool._

 ** _Happy to disappoint. Why did you send me the article?_**

 _You seemed pretty interested in it._

 ** _How did you ended up on the site?_**

 _Someone left it in a comment under a video on youtube. I wanted to check it out. What do you think?_

 ** _It's very intense...what do you think about them? The vigilantes I mean._**

 _Not much, just that there someone who is doing the right thing for once._

Jay looked over the chat. It felt weird. It was like both of the girls were testing the water.

 ** _Ditto_**

They texted about a few other things until Molly left to play her video game with friends. Jay started to read the article. It was another story about how the vigilantes saved a man's shop from gang members who wanted to burn it down with him still inside. It was scary, yet they managed to save him.

She decided to go back on the site through all the articles until she found a first one. It was posted seventeen months ago at the same time the site was created. It had an article or a video or story two times sometimes three times a week. The articles were mostly about the whole saving people topic and what it meant to have someone protect New York from gangs other than tired police. The stories were written by the people they saved or who saw them in actions. Victims and witnesses. The author edited the stories based on how good they were written.

She read most of the stories when she first found them. This was the work of Leo and his brothers. One of the victims said she felt safer knowing that there was someone looking out of her and people like her. She said she was mugged during her life eight times. Eight. It was so alarming. Yet she continued with saying that she felt safe now and grateful to the vigilantes for making her feel that way.

The author not once used the word turtle in the whole website, so Jay assumed he knew that they were actually turtles. Even if he didn't it was obvious the people who saw them would say that they were turtles also she noticed some of the comments had a stamp edited by the site. She found a small list of conditions where the author explained that he added words and phrases which could be somehow used for interpretation to reveal the identity of the vigilantes. He knew who they were. Leo said they didn't know who the author of the site was. Maybe a person they saved, or someone who saw them. Either way, he was doing the right thing. He was showing the people they were the heroes. Leo was worried about other people knowing. He spoke about people screaming and calling them things. Jay felt her heart break. Yes, they were different, and yet they weren't different. They were beautiful. Leo was beautiful. They weren't people, but they were human. Leo was human, and she didn't want people to call him anything else. To call him a monster or abomination when he was so far from it. He was a hero.

She took her phone and texted a message.

 _Please write me when you get home. Thanks_

* * *

It was a couple of days since he last came to visit Jay. They texted all the time, and when he was alone on a rooftop in Queens he even called her. She called about the squad and school. She mentioned a girl, probably a new friend. It sounded like she wasn't sure yet. He knew her enough to know she didn't have many friends. She didn't let people close. It made it feel all the more special that she let him.

He daydreamed constantly about her. She was so beautiful. He wanted to brush her hair. He wanted to feel her close to him. She always had a look on her face like she knew who he was, like she knew him inside and out despite only knowing him for such a short time. He had a feeling he knew her as well. She wasn't just some girl she was stunning and wonderful and real. She was amazing and he couldn't stop think about her and what it meant to have someone like her in his life. Trouble tons and tons of trouble, but also happiness. He never felt so...awake and captivated the way he felt when he was with Jay. It was like until this moment he didn't know he could feel so much for anyone else than his Master and brothers or April. He didn't believe he could be so devoted to another person. He was maybe thirteen when he first started to think about such a thing. They were in Donnie's workshop. It used to be a lot smaller and with fewer devices. He was fixing an old TV he managed to piece together. At one point, the TV got turned on and some psychologist was speaking about how people wanted to find a mate just like animals did. Mikey started to laugh and make jokes Leo couldn't remember because he was thinking about how he and his brothers would forever be alone. They weren't interested in girls yet or anything, but one day they maybe would, but they wouldn't be able. He knew no woman would ever see them as anything else than abominations or monsters. He knew they were destined to be only with each other till they would grow old and die.

With Jay he for the first time felt as if that didn't have to be the case. Maybe for neither of them...He thought about the strange connection Jay spoke about. He was sitting on the fire escape, and it woke her up. She could be in any room of the house he fell into and she just so happened to walked into the one he crashed into. It was strange. He didn't think much of soulmates before. He experienced his fair share of supernatural, but soulmates sounded truly bizarre to him to have one person in the world really made for you. However, now when he was actually talking with Jay and getting to know her he had to think about it. Jay was the most beautiful girl he ever saw. He thought she was the definition of beauty. It was obvious men and boys were after her. He was sure even handsome ones. She could literally spent her time without anyone she wanted to, but she didn't. As far as he could tell. Jay ignored people most of the time. She didn't have any friends, and only came to some parties and events. She didn't have any photos in her room, and from how much time she had for him, his texts even phone calls she didn't spent it with anyone else. The fact that from all the people she could be with she chose to be with him made him start to think about soulmates. Maybe it wasn't someone who fit the empty places inside, but someone who somehow manages to make you feel a connection you never felt before. That was how it felt with Jay at least. He felt an instant and profound connection which terrified him and made him run, but it was there.

He didn't know what the future would hold for them but for now he wanted to be with her. Because of that he needed to tell his brothers. If nothing else than for the sake of his own mind.

He sat all his brothers and Master down in the living room. Mikey was constantly on playing a game while Raph was looking as bored as well, Master looked encouraging and Donnie had the best poker face ever saw.

He swallowed hard before he started talking. He didn't tell them anything about his feeling because so far he didn't know too much about them either and it felt a bit embarrassing.

'There's a girl...human and she knows about me.'

There was silence for a moment Mikey was still playing the game until Donnie elbowed him. He didn't even hear what Leo said while Raph opened his mouth, 'Say that again.'

Leo sighed, 'There is a girl and I'm...friends with her.'

'Wait, you're meeting with her? On purpose?' asked Raph standing up. He could tell he was becoming upset. Great.

'Yes.'

'What? I?' he turned to Master Splinter but with one look he could tell their Master knew about everything.

'What is this? Are you insane? Who is she and why the hell would you continue to meet with her? We have rules!'

Then started the fight. Mikey was mostly confused talking about he couldn't believe he was right and Leo was in love. Donnie was quiet and Master Splinter tried to be in the middle of Raph and Leo. Raph...well Raph. He bitched and argued and straight out told Leo to break it of with his girlfriend. If it was a normal conversation not a shouting match Leo would get embarrassed by the _girlfriend_ comment, but because of the anger which was rising in both of them he told Raph to shove it and he didn't have a say in it.

'SO WHAT? Now all of us can go and get a girl or what? What makes you so special that you can tell our secret...'

'I didn't tell her anything. It was an accident because you ran off like usual into a fight and I ended up without a backup. I fell into someone's house. Thank God Jay got me out. I didn't tell her anything she just helped me. No screaming no nothing.'

'So what you followed her and started to hook up!'

'Raphael, please,' said the Master his tone leaving no more room for arguement.

Raph looked at their Master angry as hell. They knew from experience that when Raph exploded he ended up attacking all of them, but never their father. It was the one thing which they counted on and by which they knew Raph was a good guy. Now Leo felt the need to step between the two as he saw how furious his brother was. Mikey and Donnie had the same idea since they both stood up as well.

No one moved for a moment as Raph suddenly shook his head, 'You know what? Fuck it. Of course you get some special treatment. We can't say jack to anyone or reveal ourselves, but fearless here gets to have a cute girlfriend. Friggin' fantastic.'

He walked away out of the tunnels and out of the lair.

Leo sighed trying to calm down as well before he looked at Mikey and Donnie. Mikey was the first one to walk toward him. He put his hand on his shoulder, 'Hey, man. It's cool. So...can we meet her? Like family dinner? Or is it not that serious yet to meet the folks?'

Leo felt liked rolling his eyes but he actually chuckled as it helped him ease the tension.

Donnie gave him a small smile, 'As long as you're happy...and she's not a treat.'

'She's not,' assured him Leo, but he had a feeling Donnie would run a couple of backgrounds checks on the blonde soon.

His Master walked up to him as well, 'It is good to be honest my son. Raphael will calm down eventually and return.'

Leo nodded. Still, he felt like he wanted to talk to Raph soon. His brother was jackass sometimes but he was also the most caring of them all. He was upset because he loved them too much to let them get hurt. He knew that.

He just wished he could bit into his tongue and save his punches every once in a while.

* * *

Jay woke up to her phone vibrating like crazy. In her sleepy state she didn't plan to pick up until she realized who it could have been and she quickly grabbed it.

'Hello?' she answered before looking at the screen properly. She didn't have the number in her phone.

'Why did I hear that you are not coming to my party, Jay?' she heard someone on the other side.

Jay rolled her eyes as she recognized the female voice on the other end, 'Nicole...what time is it?'

'Early, I couldn't sleep. So why aren't you coming to my party, blondie?'

'You're a lunatic, Diaz,' mumbled Jay rolling to her side on the bed to burying her face in the pillow. Why the hell was she calling her now? Was she drunk again or high?

'Kim said you're planning to join the squad. What's up with you lately?' asked the raven haired girl on the other end and Jay cursed, 'Good night, Nicole.'

'Wai-wai-wait,' said Nicole, 'Are you still there?'

'Barely,' Jay looked at the alarm clock, 'Fuck, Nicole, it's like 2 A.M.'

'How come we aren't friends anymore Jay?' she asked. The blonde opened her eyes. It was a terribly hard question anytime of the day but in that moment at 2 A.M on a Friday night, it seemed just so easy.

'Because you started to care more about douche guys, and girls who secretly hate you than about what your real friends were going through, and I didn't tell you any of that...I let you go like I always do,' said the blonde honestly. She wondered if it was because Leo. Like she had some new found will to live. She started to hang out with Molly. She was weird, but in a cool kind of way. She liked it.

Nicole didn't say anything for the longest of time, and Jay was sure she wouldn't until she did, 'I'm sorry for being such a fucking...bitch. I'm sorry for leaving you alone when you needed me.'

Jay brushed her face, 'I'm...sorry for letting you.'

Nicole let out a weird noise which made Jay worried. This conversation was already bizarre, but this felt like too much.

Jay sat up, 'Nicole is something wrong? Please tell me.'

The other girl let out a silent pained sound, 'I...something happened tonight, and it just made me think about it all. I'm sorry, Jay about everything.'

Jay was silent for a while before she looked at her clothes nicely placed on desk chair for her, 'Do you still have your room at the third window on the left?'

A chuckle, 'Yeah, the doorman still has a sweet spot for you.'

Jay rolled her eyes. She hang up soon afterwards she was sure Nicole was home and safe and started to get ready to leave.

She found a message from Molly about a conspiracy theory about the government purposely sealing poisoned food in some school district cafeteria's to analyze the different symptoms. Jay was starting to wonder if she wasn't a vampire since she never slept. In school the cheerleaders tried to get her to sit with them, but she started to sit with Molly instead. It was a sort of rebellion the girl with pinkish hair approved since she started to purposely spend time with her. They weren't friends. As far as Jay could tell they were friendly acquaintances who spent a lot of time together in school now, but it was far from deep sharing she used to have with Nicole or now Leo. She doubted she would ever be as opened as she was with Nicole even with Leo it was like she felt these walls in front of the things she wanted to tell him and him. She could he would understand her, but she felt embarrassed by those things now. Molly didn't share things either. They mostly spoke about the website Vigilantes of NY or homework and school now. Jay also liked she was improving on her sign language. Maybe they could be closer but for now they were people who liked each other's company and sass.

* * *

Leo was looking down at the scene in front of him upset. They engaged in a fight which ended with the police coming.

'That was incredibly reckless, Raph, and you know it,' he said. They went out for patrol the next night after he told them about Jay. Raph wasn't talking to him, but he still came with them. He didn't like it, but he felt that it was his fault and he didn't want to push it even more.

'No, brother, it was brave. They were doing to tear that shop apart. I saved some poor sucker's business, leave me alone,' Raph crossed his arms. He that that look on his face like he was just waiting for Leo to start a fight with him, and he couldn't wait.

He glared at his brother, 'This is serious. You almost got the kid seriously injured.'

'He's a punk.'

'He's a kid.'

'He should know better and he definitely should know the risks.'

They glared at each other while their other two brothers shared a look. This would end badly. Donnie raised his hands as he stepped between them, 'Okay, can we please leave it? We did a good thing. We're fine.'

Raph looked over his shoulder at Leo, 'One of these days, something will happen, and you will finally have to admit that I'm right. This world is completely fucked up, and the only way to survive in it is to toughen up.'

Leo shook his head at his brother upset with his behaviour. Raph always crossed the line and caused trouble. It was the adrenaline rush. He was a total junky for it, but this seemed like a bit too much even for him. Sure, he had a good heart, but he was an addict to causing trouble, not to mention he had the worst case of temper imaginable.

This brother in the red bandana waved his hand at him before he rushed to the edge of the roof, 'Don't wait up.'

Mikey crossed his arms, 'Well, that did it. Sounds like it's time to split up.'

He went to the other side of the roof, 'Wait where are you going?' asked Leo confused.

'I have this thing with a friend.'

Leo and Donnie shared a look, 'What friend?' they said at the same time and Mikey sighed, 'Look it's a game thing, okay? We play online. I sort of lost a bet the other day so I have to go do this thing.'

'What thing?'

'It's nothing crazy or exposing. It's actually funny. I promise to tell you later, but I have to go alone.'

They shared another look before Leo nodded. He was honestly tired of being the oldest from time to time, and tonight was definitely that night. Besides who was he to tell them anything now? He was meeting a human girl a couple of times a week exposing pretty much everything about him and his family.

'Fine. Just be careful.'

He sighed as Mikey waved at him goofily before he left.

Donnie looked at him again, 'You okay?'

'Just exhausted from all of this. Do you have somewhere to be?'

'Not particularly,' said Donnie in his soft voice which meant he was lying. Leo smiled, 'You gone some experiment you want to work on?'

'It's a new prototype,' said his brother almost guiltily.

'Alright, I will see you at home. I think I will go clear my head a bit.'

Donnie smiled at him briefly, 'With this _Jay_?'

Leo looked at him, 'If she's awake. You already looked into her didn't you?'

'Yes, and she's just a normal girl so for now we should be fine.'

'Are you upset? That I didn't tell you before?' he asked. They all have a special relationship with each other. Despite being all equals sometimes it was easier to deal with something with just one brother.

Donnie, the passionate genius, was most easy to deal with for Leo. It wasn't uncommon that they shared things which weren't shared with Mikey or Raph. Not to say something about Jay could have felt like a betrayed. He wanted to ask if they were okay, but they feared the answer.

They parted and Leo headed to Jay's apartment where he found her climbing out of the window.

'Okay?' he was confused as he jumped on the on the floor above hers.

'Hey, what are you up to, tonight?'

She smiled at him, 'Hey. My friend is maybe in trouble so I'm going to see her.'

He looked at her clothes and backpack. She looked like she was about to run away.

Jay followed his gaze before she crossed her arms, 'How fast can you we get to Upper East Side?'

'A quite fancy friend.'

'With a lot of daddy issues, so how about it? Want to walk me there?' asked the blond smiling at him. He watched her for a moment before he chuckled and looked around, 'It might be high and fast.'

'I'm not afraid of heights or speed. But if you don't want to it's fine, I'll just go on my own.'

He put his hand on her elbow. She stopped and smirked raising her brows, 'Well?'

'You have to promise me to hold on tight...really tight, Jay.'

She titled her head her curls falling a bit over her face, 'Promise.'

He moved closer. He could so easily intimidate people with how large he was. Not her. She always stood her ground she always took him as equal. He found her really amazing.

'Okay, let's do this. How do we do this?' she asked.

He put his arm around her waist and lifted her upon his shoulder, 'Still good?'

She looked down, 'Yeah, it's not that high.'

He chuckled. He carefully guided her closer, 'Arms around my neck.'

She giggled but obeyed, 'Don't drop me, Mr.'

He jumped and she barely contained a yelp from the surprise.

Jay thought about everything which happened for the last few days as Leo carried her around the city. It was really amazing and scary but in a way a rollercoaster ride was. You held for your dear life but you loved every moment of it. She loved getting to be in his arms and feeling him against her. She felt his heart speeded up and wondered if it was from the run or from her closeness.

When she got out of her window she hoped it wouldn't be a waste of time. She hoped she wouldn't find Nicole having a pharm party or whatever with David and their asshole friends. She would kill her for sure, but now it was definitely worth it to wake up tonight.

As she snuggled closer to Leo's body she thought about her Latino friend. She and Nicole used to be attached to the hip. They met in dance classes when they were kids and really felt connected. Nicole was very funny and cheerful always talking too much which made Jay laugh. People looked at them annoyed, but it didn't matter because as long as Nicole was happy it made Jay as well. They were from different world. Jay a daughter of a working single mother, while Nicole a single daughter of Upper East Side power couple. It still never felt that way. Nicole had a nanny and maids who took care of her constantly while Jay got to walk alone to and from school almost every day. Still, they were best friend. Sometimes you are friends with people who may seem like your opposite yet they deep inside they are just like you. Jay could sense that Nicole was a lonely soul too, only she hid it with fake smiles and talking too much.

With Jay she could be silent. They used to have secret hideouts, handshakes, words. They had so many dance numbers she couldn't even remember all. They used wear familiar close like sister even if no ne ever bought it. With Nicole Jay felt like she didn't need anyone else in her life.

Then Nicole got her braces off and started to spent time with the kids of her parents friends. She asked Jay over a couple of times, but it was weird to be around kids who wanted to know who made your clothes and what kind of car your parents drive. Soon Nicole didn't call Jay for those kind of events and Jay stopped calling Nicole permanently. They stopped talking completely during fourteen- fifteen until they ended up in the same Spanish class in High School.

The teacher told them the page in the text book and Nicole leaned closer to her asking, 'What did she say?' It was the first time she spoke with Jay in almost six months.

Ever since then it was like they were classmates, nothing less nothing more. Nicole invited Jay often to her parties and exchanged some words like _how's it going? Having fun? Want some vodka?_

Funny how people go from strangers to friends, to best friends and sisters to strangers again. She never thought about it before but Nicole was the reason she didn't try to be friends with anyone anymore maybe Leo, but she couldn't exact fit him into the _friend_ category since she daydreamed about his arms and kissing him.

Jay didn't know what to think about seeing Nicole or her apology. She hugged Leo tighter and felt his hand brush her back a bit, 'Are you okay?'

'Yeah, I'm fine.'

Not long after she said it he landed down on one of the building slowly letting her from his chest to look at her face. He even brushed her hair a bit away, 'Are you sure?'

'It's not the ride...I haven't spoke to my friend in a while. I...I don't know what to expect.'

'Did you have a fallout?' he asked his eyes soft. He didn't want to push her if she wasn't ready. He could tell so far Jay had a lot of demons inside she wasn't ready to let out yet. Not even for him.

'It wasn't a fight if that is what you mean...but we just stopped being friends. We went from sharing each others' secrets to polite _hellos_ in the hallways. I don't know how to act now.'

Jay bit her lip looking up at him, 'I don't trust people easily...and I don't give second chances for free you know.'

He stroked her hair a bit. He liked playing with it.

'I can tell,' he let the hand fall down, 'But you decided to go to her that has to be worth for something, Jay. You want something to change...it doesn't have to be like before, but before I am guessing you were different people...maybe now you can have a relationship based on what kind of people you are now.'

'Thanks...Thank you, Leo.'

She watched him for a moment. She really wanted to kiss him in that very moment so much, but she knew that wouldn't be right because she forced herself to promise she wouldn't kiss him first. She liked him a lot. She didn't want him as friend if there was possibility to be more, but she wanted him to be in it too. He couldn't be confused or doing it not to hurt her. He had to be honest. She knew he would be, so he needed to make the move when he was ready for it.

He could tell what she was thinking. There was no connection needed. She wanted to kiss him. He could smell her getting aroused and see how she looked at his mouth before she glued her eyes into his to stop herself from looking down. She wanted to kiss him, and he wanted to kiss her back. He knew if she did, he would. He felt like he was tested by her. All those nights he visited she hugged him before he left keeping him close, but didn't kiss him. It was clear from how she looked at him he wanted him to do it.

If only he wasn't such a coward and get a grip he would since he was just as desperate for it as she was.

Instead he lifted her up again and carried her jumping to the next building.

It took them about twenty minutes jumping around through the roofs before he placed her down on her feet finally, 'This is as close as I can get without causing panic in the street because of an alien attack.'

She put her hand against his chest, 'That was fun. Maybe you could take me on a walk more often.'

'Maybe you should go visit more of your fancy friends more often.'

Jay smiled at him before she stood up on her toes and kissed his cheek, 'Thanks for the ride, Leonardo.'

He put his hand on her elbow all of the sudden. He was surprised by it as well. He didn't expect to do so, it was just instinct.

'I'm sorry. I'm not sure what...'

She brushed her wild curls as the wind blew them around a bit, and he sort of just knew what he wanted to do. What he should do. He always wanted to do it, but now with her hair flying all around her head and the night so cold yet warm and her eyes so blue...he just went for it.

It was like she knew he finally found the courage because once he leaned down toward her she met him half way. He was still so freakishly tall she had to step on her toes, but his support on her elbow helped.

It was a soft kiss, brief, yet utterly amazing. She kissed him passionately in the kitchen to make sure he wouldn't forget her and look for her again. She kissed him then so he would know what it is like to be wanted to way she wanted him since she felt laid eyes on him. This wasn't like that. This wasn't reckless or rushed or with a hint of urgency and fear of limited time.

It was pure, and a bit naive and innocent. It was just a pressed of the lips until he went into her mouth and their tongues brushed, but even then it was mostly calm and balanced. Yet it made him forget that they were in an alley. His mind drifted to cheery blossoms, how nice they looked in the spring, how they smelled and how it made him feel all calm as he watched them or thought of them while meditating. Leo did his best to enjoy but also to memorize the kiss. It didn't feel like it was night anymore in a dark alley, it felt like it was a warm sunny day in the spring with the cherry blossoms above them. He carefully locked the memory into his mind for later times.

He felt her smile at the end of the kiss when they broke up before he saw it. She looked almost smug, but her eyes were honest. She was moved by the kiss just as much as he was. They were both fools in love.

'What?' he asked, and she shrugged her shoulders, 'I told myself I wouldn't kiss you until you did. I'm glad you did.'

He was too stunned to say anything in that moment still feeling the warm feeling the kiss brought, and she just rushed away stopping at the street lamp light to wave at him. He felt so utterly happy and confused he doubted there was ever a way to described the feeling inside his heart.

He went up on the roof, just to watch her go into a building her blonde curls disappeared inside one of the buildings. It was a fancy neighbourhood and there were too many apartments to guess which one was hers so he decided to wait a few minutes in case she decided to leave before he actually left.

Jay felt like she went back in time as she got out of the elevator. The apartment looked the same as it did when she was a little girl with a Hello Kitty backpack being lead their by Nicole and her nanny Sabrina.

The apartment looked quiet. The doorman Mr. Jenson let her in and Nicole texted her the combination to the elevator. The silence made Jay nervous as she quickly rushed to where she knew Nicole's room used to be.

As it turned out it still was.

Jay hadn't entered it in years since most of the parties took place in her dad's house. The room looked so much different then when they were kids. It was full of posters of bands and artists Jay thought were lame and mess. She noticed the ashtray on the window frame. She guessed it wouldn't only be nicotine ashes there.

Since when did Nicole stop cleaning her room? Last year? Clothes were everywhere and it made the room seem less like a room on Upper East Side and more like a dump. Jay couldn't help but felt a bit judgey. Nicole and her rich friends, had clothes for thousands of dollars and yet they treated them like garbage. Some people were weird.

The door opened and Jay crossed her arms, 'Hey, you ever heard of cleaning?'

Half of Nicole's face stayed hidden behind the door for a moment as she was in the bathroom.

'Can you turn off the light please?'

Jay frowned, 'Why?'

'Just turn off the light, okay? You can turn on the desk lamp.'

Jay crossed her arms, 'No, show me. What's wrong?'

Nicole waited for a moment before she put pulled the door away and showed the other girl her face. When Jay was a little girl there was a boy in the kindergarten named David. He was really cute and although no one admitted it it was clear some teachers liked him a bit more than the other kids because he was so cute. He started to walk up to her and play. It was fun at first until he choked her one day. It wasn't anything serious. He didn't hurt her, he was a kid, but it freaked her out for a while. Her mom went to school with her and told the teachers. David confessed and said he wouldn't do it again. In the end, they seemed to treat him even better always asking him how he was. A week later he shoved another girl down the stairs. It turned out that his dad was quite violent. Apparently he sometimes took it out on his wife, and David simply mimicked the actions. She started to stay away from him. His parents got divorced, and almost eleven and something years later he started hooking up with her ex friend, Nicole. She knew they were in an on again off again relantioship, but people pretty much considered them ending up together. You don't step into the same river that often without it meaning something. Or so Jay thought.

Jay walked closer to her but didn't touch her. She just kept on looking at her, her heart in her throat as she watched a large shiner cover Nicole's pretty face.

'Did David do that?'

Nicole shook her head, 'No, it was someone else.'

She walked around her, but Jay stopped her, and put her hands on her shoulders, 'Nicole.'

The raven haired girl looked up at her before she hugged her tight. It had been years since she hugged her like this. Occasionally Nicole would try to drunkenly hug her, but it was not the same. This was real.

Nicole hugged her back. She didn't cry. She didn't tell her anything. They just stood there. Jay McClaud and Nicole Diaz hugging each other the way they used to when they were friends, sister even like they went back in time before all those shitty things which happened to them.

They were eventually lying in the bed in their pyjamas. Jay decided to stay texting Leo he could go home. She had a feeling in the back of her mind he was still outside. 'So what happened?'

Nicole brushed her face as she looking up at her wall, 'I was out with David and his friend Kyle. He said we could get something for tonight. To take the edge off.'

Jay was silent. She knew Nicole was into booze and drugs and boys now. Everyone in the school knew that. She thought it was only a party thing, but apparently Nicole needed to have something even on a normal Friday night.

She shook her head, 'Anyway, we went to this dealer Pencil.'

'Whoa, a really awesome gang name.'

'Right?' chuckled Nicole before she sighed, 'Anyway, the guy started to act weird. He was high, paranoid. He said something about Kyle and us being snitches. They got into a fight. I got into the middle and on the ground. Then the Pencil guy pulled the gun. It was so scary, I'm not sure how I managed not to pee myself.' said the Latino girl trying to sound calm when her voice was shaking.

Jay hugged her a bit. She remembered the time they were kids and everything seemed so much easier and happier. It was before people started to act toward her like she was a piece of meat and Nicole's parents got divorced tossing her around like a doll.

Nicole lied her head against Jay's shoulder, 'Did David got you home?'

The raven haired girl shook her head, 'No, that asshole ran...there was this...guy. Some guy was passing by,' mumbled the girl like she still couldn't believed what happened, 'He _helped_ me out.'

Jay brushed her hair. She used to have lighter brown hair, but she started to dye it when they were thirteen.

'A nice Samaritan.'

Nicole chuckle, 'Yeah, so nice he called me a freaking junky.'

'Well, you did go buy drugs so do you blame him?'

She shook her head, 'No...he was nicer than I deserve.'

Her phone vibrated on the bed. Nicole took it and looked at the ID.

'David?' asked Jay, 'If yes, can I tell him something? Please. I've been looking forward to it since kindergarten.'

Nicole shook her head again it was like Jay's whole body was moving as she moved against her, 'I don't know what to do.'

'He left you in an alley with some dealers, you know what to do, Nicole,' said Jay firmly. She hoped she could knock some sense into the other girl. She still cared for her even if they weren't friends for a while now.

'I texted him I am fine and we will talk tomorrow. I don't want to deal with it today,' she said. Jay stroke her hair, 'You have to stop, Nicole. This can't go on.'

'I'll deal with it tomorrow, okay?' she asked hopeful. She knew she wouldn't. Jay could tell she wouldn't. She had a sense about people, and Nicole was the type who would easily fall back to old bad habits with people like David and Kyle in her life.

She looked down at her, 'You're too good for him.'

Nicole looked over at Jay with a soft smile as if Jay was the child, 'No, Jay, I'm not.'

The blonde hugged her tighter, 'You're such an idiot.'

Nicole chuckled, 'I know. I just want to sleep now and...have my party tomorrow and...whatever happens.'

'Don't you want to report it? The guy took a gun on you. Could he come after you?'

Nicole shook her head, 'No, it will be fine. I promise. It was the first time I saw him and he me...we won't meet again and I can't explain why I was with him in the first place. I rather do it this way.'

Jay sighed, but she understood it. It wasn't like Nicole could go to the police and say _Hey, while I was buying drugs the dealer pulled a gun on me?_

She kissed Nicole's forehead and stayed quiet for a while.

Soon Nicole's breathing got even and Jay could tell she was asleep. She wondered about Nicole. She was an addict now. It was as bad as it could if she had to go out buying drugs from drug dealers like that Pencil guy. It worried her. The author of the Vigilantes of NY often mentioned in his article how drug related crimes increased by thirty percent since the Purple Dragons got divided into three main gangs. Now it was a power struggle and it was clear everyone wanted to be ahead.

She looked at Nicole's calm sleeping face. In her mind Jay for her a moment saw her lying on the coroners table in a morgue death. She shook the dark thought away and lied next to her silently unable to sleep.

* * *

 **A.N: Hi guys, so I decided to start adding OCs for other guys as well. It might be a horrible mistake, but I hope it will work out just fine. Next chapter will be about Nicole.**


	5. The Popular Girl 01

**The Popular Girl**

* * *

 _The strongest drug that exits for a human is another human being._

* * *

The night was going boring. She was spending it at her mom's apartment in Upper East Side. She rather was in her dad's house. It had a yard where she could sit and have parties, but her mom was supposed to have her until Saturday so she had to be there. Her parents split up when she was nine, so it was always moving from one parent to another. She constantly had to remember the schedule who to go to now. She made a mistake once and her parents called their lawyers and argued that the other was using her. She made a habit of writing it on her wrist just to be sure. She still did it sometimes even now.

She lightened a cigarette and went to sit on her window. Her mother hated when she smoke inside, but she didn't want to go down the elevator and out. She smoked and watched NY streets underneath her. She loved her city. She was in Paris, London, Vienna even Dubai, but she loved NY the most. It was alive and real. She adored it. She needed to go out. She needed to feel it again.

David promised to show up soon, so she wouldn't have to sit there all night. They weren't dating. She never dated anyone, but as far as relationships went they were definitely a couple. They argued a lot, and she knew he often slept with other girls as did she with guys, but they always ended up together again. They were alike. Both kids of rich parents who gave them everything they wanted. Both wanting a bit more danger and excitement in their lives.

She was so bored that night it made her tired she needed something to get a new edge. She was bored to death. She always jumped out of her skin when David finally texted her. He wanted to go get high. He promised it would be fun.

She brushed her eyes and got up. She put out the smoke and closed the window. It was a bit cold. She wanted to do something she was so bored. She carelessly swapped through some instagram days of people she was following. She stopped at Kim's day. She was the cheerleaders' captain this year. It was quite surprising to have a sophomore for a cheer-captain, but Kim was a busy bee like that. She was on all committees and involved in every school activity. Kim and Nicole interacted a lot since she was on prom and dance committees too. She was always shocked and a bit annoyed how perfect Kim was. She always thought Matt, her boyfriend, was quite hot. She tried to make a move on him once or twice when she was drunk, but the boy always gently let her down. Kim was definitely one lucky bitch if you were into romantic stuff like that.

 _An evening with the best girls in the world. Love you mom and sis_

She watched as three redheads were smiling into the camera. Kim, her mom and little sister. They were very alike. Of course someone like Kim lived a perfect little life with spotless family. She met her dad once when he was driving them to a school dance committee meeting. He was genuine and actually didn't stare at her shorts. He made a couple of dad jokes to which Kim laughed and asked him to stop, but it was clear she wasn't annoyed. How was it that someone people had shitty lives and some just amazing?

Her phone ended up on the bed as she pulled down her sweatpants.

Nicole put on a pair of skinny jeans and reddish top. She walked to the mirror and put on her makeup. It took her little over twenty minutes to get it done, since she still had the foundation from morning. She took a hair straightened and did her hair. It always started to curl after a few hours. She checked herself in the mirror until her phone buzzed.

She picked it up and swapped the message from her David away. She put the phone above her head and took a picture. She smiled and then tried to look intense. She watched the two pictures for a while before she added them to her instagram and put her lousi vuittons on her feet. She took one quick look into the mirror and pulled her hair a bit to the side to look a bit wilder before she walked out of the room. She dyed her hair black when she was fifteen and she still thought it was the best colour for her. She had brownish hair before but it looked so boring and lame at times. David suggested a couple of weeks ago that she should try to go to blonde, but the idea was ridiculous. Don't fix what's not broken.

His car was parked under the apartment. The doorman took one look at her outfit and sighed telling her to have a nice night. Mr. Jensen was a nice old man. He worked as a doorman since she was little girl. He was always nice to her and called her little princess or mrs. Diaz even when she was nine. She liked him. When she was a little girl, Suzie Grey's grandfather used to pick her up from dance class. Nicole used to think Mr. Jensen was her own grandfather since he acted just as nice. Her mom called her silly and told her, her grandpa lives in Spain. They went to visit him a few times, but he didn't act as warm as Me. Jensen and slapped her when she broke a vase. She knew it was probably expensive, but ever since then when her mom suggested visiting him she argued not to.

She walked into the car, silver Porsche he got for his sixteen birthday, and kissed him with a smirk, 'This better be worth it.'

David looked at her clothes, 'What are you wearing?'

She looked at the jeans and then shrugged, 'It's cold. Christmas is coming up. Do you have my gift ready?'

He gave her a look before he leaned toward her and kissed her neck, 'Come on, we're meeting my friend Kyle-'

'Damn it, you know I hate that loser!'

'Come on, Nicky, I want him to be jealous of my smoking girlfriend and her nicely toned legs,' he kissed her again, and she rolled her eyes, 'Fine.'

She got out of the car and switched her jeans for a skirt. She took her favourite jacket and went back to the car. Mr. Jenson raised his brown.

Nicole flipped her hair, 'It's a warm night, Later Mr. J.'

She got back to the car and looked at him, 'Satisfied?'

'Aren't you? Look how hot you look,' he grinned at her and she chuckled.

They got to Kyle house. He was waiting for them outside. He looked excited. Nicole never liked him cause he had a habit of dating fourteen year olds and virgins. He liked to brag about his latest prey and how was going to do her. It was seriously annoying. Sure, if the girls were dumb enough to go with him they shouldn't be surprised he was bragging about them.

Nicole tuned out and looked out of the window. It was dark outside, but with the city lights it was never dark enough. She remembered going on a holiday with her parents once out of city. It was so alluring. She wondered if she could get lost in it, she wondered what would happen if she walked into the pinch black dark. Some people were afraid of the dark, but not Nicole. She would turn off her lamp and watched the darkness of her own room guessing where everything was. When she was a kid, she went to the movies with some friends. She was twelve. At one point she looked over at Jay who was silently eating popcorn. She was her best friend. Her eyes caught someone standing behind her. Everyone was watching the movie in front of them, and Nicole felt like she was the only one who saw the man standing by the door in the dark of the room. Jay looked over at her at one point and asked, 'What's wrong?'

She even looked to the man, but she turned back like it was nothing out of the ordinary. They used to be quite like Jay and her, and yet they were different. They used to be best friends. Nicole used to think that her souls was complete because she had Jay. Her parents argued and let her go wherever she wanted and do whatever she wanted. It was likes she was invisible to them. Jay's mom let them stayed at her house. They watched movies and had sleepovers. They played together. Then one day, she was thirteen and Jay told her what happened with her therapist. She was shocked and disappointed she told Jay everything, and she thought Jay did the same. She didn't. That summer she got rid of her braces and Lorrie Sage took her under her wings. Lorrie was seventeen and her dad owned a few magazines. She knew a few celebrities and always wore the most awesome clothes. Nicole used to admire her. She introduced her to fashion, alcohol, drugs, smoking and boys. Jay and she fell apart. Lorrie became her best friend. Now she was in college it made her life both boring and interesting. She took Lorrie's place and was now one of the most popular girls in the school. She held all the best parties, was in charge in a lot of events and happening. She was the fun girl everyone wanted to hang out with cause they knew they would had a good time.

'Hey, Nicky, got any cute friends you could hook me up with? Maybe a little sister,' said Kyle suddenly.

The raven haired girl rolled her eyes, 'First of all, you don't get to call me that. Second, aw, hell no.'

'Really? What about the blonde one from your last party?'

Nicole frowned, 'Which one?'

'You know, the one with wavy hair great ass,' he said.

'I think you mean Jay,' said David calmly. She looked over at him frowning.

'What? You know Jay's pretty hot.'

Nicole looked to the front again, 'Yeah, she is, but she's seventeen like me so not your type.'

Kyle made a grimace, 'Well, I'm not always up for younger girls. You know that,' he winked at her.

She turned back to the front. She started to think about her party a couple of weeks ago. She woke up alone in her room with her skirt and panties off. She blacked out from the alcohol. She remembered kissing someone and pulling down someone's zipper. Was it with Kyle? She didn't ask David, she didn't want him to make fun of her blackout. She brushed her shoulder. It didn't matter. It was just another night.

They joked a bit about Jay, until David noticed she wasn't feeling it and cut it out. He parked at the place Kyle said but remained in the car.

'So what?' asked Nicole after she checked herself in her phone, 'And I hope it's not spice again.'

'I was thinking more of some fun pounder.'

'As long it's not glue,' she looked at David and go out of the car. She pulled out a cigarette and lightened it up. It was a cold night. She hoped they would get some cocaine or molly and leave. She never went to actually buy something they always had something.

She followed David and took his hand. He smirked at her walking behind Kyle to lead them to some guy, 'Pencil, my friend.'

She raised her brows at the ridiculous nickname. The man was really tall and skinny. She seriously didn't think he was a gangbanger. He looked at every one of them. He didn't look too impressed with David, and barely looked at her.

She took a step closer and smirked at him hoping to reveal her herself a bit so he would be interested. She wasn't, but it didn't feel right for him not to want her. How easy it was for girls like Jay who were so pretty they didn't even have to bother and some girls could spent hours every morning on their hair and makeup and still had to try so hard to get a guy to look at them.

'Whoa, that is more than last time, Pencil, dude, what the hell?' asked Kyle suddenly.

Nicole crossed her arms. She was cold.

The sketchy guy frowned. He looked upset, 'Yeah, well, last time you were alone.'

He frowned at David and Nicole again. She didn't like this. She didn't like this at all. She felt like a canary all of the sudden. She felt like something was going to happen. Something really really bad. She wanted to step back like David did, but she froze. She couldn't move. She remained still watching as Kyle put his hand on Pencil's shoulder.

Suddenly a gun was out pointing at Kyle's forehead, 'Back off, asshole.'

She swallowed watching Kyle stepping backward with his hands up in surrender, 'Come on, man. I just asked we're cool.'

'No _man_ we're not. You came here last week and we had a suspicious bust and now I think you're the one who snitched.'

'Dude, I wouldn't-'

'Shut up, and who are those two, ha?' he asked and the gun was suddenly pointing at her. She couldn't speak. She wished she could shout, but she froze. That was a real gun pointing at her.

'Speak up, bitch!' he shouted at her.

She opened her mouth, 'I just wanted some pills. I swear.'

'Oh, yeah?' he asked and stepped closer to her the gun still in his hand, 'Come here, bitch. You looked pretty smug before, so come here!'

She didn't move.

'Are you deaf?!' he asked and Kyle took her by the wrist, 'Go to him!'

'Let me go! LET GO!' she struggled with him just as Pencil stepped closer. They all fought until suddenly Pencil hit her with the gun over the face and she lost her balance. She ended up on the ground. Her face and knee hurt. She quickly rolled to her back sitting up.

'Fucking idiots!' screamed Pencil and pushed Kyle away. She watched as he pointed the gun at her again.

She wanted to close her eyes, but before Pencil pulled the trigger the ground jerked a bit from some impact and he got hit over the head. The gun fell from his hands somewhere to her left, and both her and Kyle watched as Pencil was tossed aside easily by someone wearing a green armour. No not an armour a turtle costume.

Kyle screamed and ran while she was still on the ground looking at the guy. She was speechless. Speechless from everything which happened and was still happening. She noticed movement somewhere in the dark behind him.

'Behind you!'

The turtle man turned around and with a quick kick got another guy on the ground with a pipe. He was knocked out as well.

She pulled her legs closer and tried to get up but shaky legs kept on spilling on the tiny heels.

She looked up after a moment, the turtle man was looking down at her. He wasn't just wearing a turtle costume, he was wearing a red bandana over his head and some weird armourlike parts over the costume.

He put his hand on her elbow which was when she felt it. She looked at his hand on her skin as he lifted her up with just one hand. He wasn't wearing a costume. He was really a gigantic turtle man. She was freaking astonished. Her was the real deal. Holy shit!

She looked at his face, 'Fucking junky.'

She felt so upset she could usually tell anyone off, but looking at the...guy she couldn't form words. She couldn't tell him a single thing.

He let her go and tried to leave, but she grabbed his wrist and looked at it properly. He had three large fingers. He could talk and looked like a guy in a way, but a turtle. She debated if she wasn't high or something and this was just a part of the hallucination.

He pulled his hand away from her. He looked upset for a moment like he would shout at her in a moment. She knew men like that, but instead he walked backwards, 'Put some ice on it.'

He nodded at her face before he jumped on the roof and disappear. She rushed closer to see him again, but he was gone. Her heart continued to beat like crazy, and she wasn't sure from what anymore.

She heard one of the dealers groan so she quickly ran away. David and Kyle were gone. She hugged her arms looking around. She had her stupid bag in David's car. She had all her stuff there. Her phone, wallet...fucking DAVID.

Her face and knee hurt. She touched it. Her face felt just bruised, but her knee was broken for sure. She looked around. It was night and the street was empty. She had to walk.

FUCKING DAVID

She looked behind to the place where the men were lying. She walked the for a moment and picked up the gun. She quickly put it into her skirt and left.

* * *

Raph was on the rooftop of the building above the alley. He heard the noises and watched those teens come to buy drugs, he would interfere sooner, but he wanted to see how it would turn out because of how upset the drug dealer looked.

Another girl who didn't scream. What was up it her? She was a junky. He could smell it. All three teens were addicts. There was a gun and struggle, not a good combination. The girl ended up on the ground and the dealer was ready to shot. He got him down easily.

He didn't even notice the other guy until he heard the movement and the girl warned him. He wasn't expecting her to help. He got her up taking her elbow. He tried not to think about how soft her skin felt or why she grabbed his wrist. She was not afraid of him. Her hand was soft and she looked curious more than anything else.

Idiot. Why the hell did he do that? Leo and Master will kill him for sure.

He really messed it up. He gave Mikey shit for giving the other chick her bag back and what did he do?

 _Jesus_

He watched as the girl got out of the alley. She wasn't dressed for this November cold night. She was dressed slutty, but he knew she wasn't a hooker. The clothes were nice not tacky. Something out of a dance, not strip club.

He should have let her be, but she was alone dressed like that in NY. Some tough guy he was if all it took was a girl in a short skirt. She walked alone. He didn't know where the other two guys disappeared but leaving her alone was not okay. It took her two hours to get home to Upper East Side. So she definitely wasn't a hooker. The door man rushed to her from the door and put his coat on her. He guided her inside. At least someone was looking out for her. Once she was finally inside, he looked at his hand. She took it, touch it. He wasn't expecting that. He was shocked she wasn't screaming. All of them screamed. Always screamed or ran or something which made him feel disgusted about himself and want to hid, not her though. She took his hand and looked at it. She had to be terrified by it. His body, how he looked.

He looked at the fancy building where the girl probably lived.

Little rich girl with drug problems. Nothing new.

He left after that. Why bother staying? He followed some suspicious looking guys into an alley only to find them making out.

He rolled his eyes and went home. He was a bit disappointed he didn't manage to let out steam more. He went to his punching bag. He needed to calm down. He wasn't upset about the thing with Leo anymore. He always managed to calm down after a while, usually on patrols. Tonight he didn't get much of a change, the drug dealers were too easy to handle.

He punched the bag harder thinking about what happened. The gun, the teenagers, the junky girl and her soft hands.

He punched it so hard it hit the wall.

'Damn it, Ralph, knock it off!' came Donnie's shout from another room.

He breathed hard trying to get a hold of himself.

He sat down and took several deep breath. Meditation was never his strong suit, but he always tried it for his Master.

Why the hell would a rich girl be in a stupid alley like that? Why would she use drugs? Why wouldn't she scream?

She looked scared with her face slowly bruising and her knee was bleeding so bad, yet she just watched him silently. Maybe she hit her head too hard.

He opened his eyes, it was pointless either way, he would never see her again.

He shouldn't think about her anymore.

'Yo Raph, movie?' asked Mikey as he opened the door without knocking.

He turned around and his brother blinked, 'You okay?' he asked and Raph nodded, 'Just nothing cheesy, alright?'

* * *

Nicole woke up in the early morning. Jay was lying next to her. Her hair which was always curly never looked out of place. She couldn't believe she called her. She couldn't believe they still had something to talk about. She used to think they would always be best friends, maybe they still could be that. From all the people she could call, she called Jay and invited her home. Shockingly Jay came, but she was Jay of course she did. Some people were just like that. They were the nicest people imaginable.

She took her phone again.

Jill and Tamara wrote send her a selfie they were together at Jill's place and thought she was hooking up with David, which was why she didn't show up.

She didn't tell them a single thing. She was friends with them for a long time and yet she didn't want them to ever know about what happened tonight. She should stay with booze for now on.

The raven haired girl got out of the bed. Her knee was fine, but her face still hurt. She went to the bathroom to look at it. It was getting worse.

David left her another message.

 _Can I come over?_

She wanted to wrote back: _Go to hell._

 _No._

 _I never want to see you or Kyle again._

She wrote back something else of course.

 _No, see you tomorrow._

She wanted to tell Jay about the turtle man, but she also didn't want to. It felt like some secret. Something only hers. It felt good to keep it for a while. She brushed her arm, the part he had grabbed when he helped her up. She remembered the sensation. She never felt anything like that before. Maybe it was because she never in her life met anyone like him.

He was a real life turtle man, and he saved her life.

He looked at her...he said she was a junky, but he looked at her. When she touched him and told her to put ice on the eye, he looked...like he felt the sensation too.

She returned to the bed. She thought the blonde was asleep when Jay spoke, 'How's the eye?'

'Swelling and changing color,' replied Nicole, 'I will have to take care of it tomorrow for the party.'

Jay sighed. She was annoyed, 'You don't have to. You could cancel.'

'I already invited everyone, Jay. You know I can't just cancelled.'

'You can do whatever you want, Nicole.'

'No, I can't...no really can. We all have to play our part. We all have some social role to fulfil and such BS,' said Nicole. They were both staring at the dark ceiling lying on their backs next to each other on Nicole's nicely soft bed.

'Everyone expects something of you once you get a label, gay, straight, jock, nerd, popular...even a pretty girl, Jay.'

'I don't do shit.'

'But everyone expects it from you. They expect you to do shit like date a lot, kiss a lot, put out. They all expect you to either be too good for them or just right for them because you're pretty,' said Nicole. She could tell Jay understood her point.

They were quiet for a while until Jay took her hand. She linked their fingers together. It felt almost as if nothing changed. As if the last couple of years were just a dream and they were still best friends riding their bikes down the street and dancing in their rooms to One Direction or Jonas Brothers.

'What about you? Do you hate being popular?'

It took her a moment to form the right answer.

'No, I like having people want to hang out with me, and dress like me, and repeat what I say. I like people liking me, and looking at me like I am amazing and the best thing in the world. I like the feeling it brings when people look at me like I have all the power in their little world. I guess, I like being loved like that. I like having control like that,' said Nicole realizing she wasn't been that honest in a while if ever. Many things happened tonight. It was too much for her.

'Isn't it sad...,' said Jay quietly and Nicole wondered if she was holding back not to cry.

'That we need other people to feel good about ourselves...to feel loved...'

'That we can't love ourselves on our own?' filled in Nicole.

'Yeah, exactly that.'

They fell asleep afterwards. Nicole wondered if in the morning it would be weird having Jay back in her life, but for now there was no one else wanted here. She had so many friends, and yet Jay was the only one she wanted to see right now.

 _Fucking junky_

* * *

'Okay, well, that was lame.'

'Buu, you just hate it cause it wasn't another Fast and Furious movie,' replied Mikey stretching up as they walked to their rooms.

'No, I hated it because it was weird. A white chick and her folks stuff other white folks into black people? Like what the hell?'

'It had an important message to today's racial discrimination and current situation.'

'Oh, give me a break. I wanted to relax not have to think about another existential problem.'

'I liked it. It was intense,' said Leo and Mikey high fived with him, 'That's my man. See, Raphie boy, you don't know what's good.'

He rolled his eyes and walked into his room, 'Hey, got a moment?'

He looked over at Leo and nodded, 'Sure.'

Mikey and Donnie gave them space and went to their rooms, 'I just want to say...'

'Leo, forget it. It's fine. I'm...you know...I'm me and I don't mean it.'

Leo smiled and patted his shoulder, 'I know. Good night.'

'Night,' said Raph and walked into his room. He felt a bit guilty about not saying anything to anyone, but at the same time he was glad no one noticed anything. He didn't want them to call him a hypocrite. He felt like one though. He should have told them.

He lied back. He needed to sleep and put this whole thing behind him. He will never saw her again, so what was the point.

* * *

 **A.N: So what do you think? One a scale from utterly terrible to great?**


	6. The Popular Girl 02

**The Popular Girl**

* * *

 _No one looks back on their lives and remember those boring nights they got plenty of sleep._

* * *

The day with Jay was like something totally new and yet same old. It was so easy to fall back into old habits and friendships. They talked about shit which happened since they stopped talking like it wasn't a big deal anymore and laughed on stupid jokes and normal things. She forced Jay to try a few of her stuff so she could wear it for the party. Of course she looked perfect in everything. She was Jay.

They had breakfast in the morning with her mom and her newest boyfriend. It was nice. Jay was probably the only friend her mom ever liked. She stopped by the doorman later when he came to the shift. He and Jay talked a bit. Everyone was happy about her being back. Oddly Nicole was too.

It wasn't until they came to her dad's house that the things which made her hate Jay a bit before started to show again.

Nicole did her hair with an iron as she looked over at Jay. The girl always had wonderful hair. So curly. Nicole adored her hair. She tried to curly it a couple of times, but it never looked as real or breathtaking as it did for Jay. She didn't even do anything with it. She got out of the shower and blew her hair with a fan, and looked like an angel with her blonde hair like a halo made from her hair.

She almost forgot how hard it was to be friends with Jay around other people. People who judged them and compared them.

Nicole hated it. It always made her feel insecure.

She watched as Jay easily put on the dress she gave her. She looked stunning. She wondered if Jay knew who she was. The most prettiest girl in their school which every douche wanted to jump. She was above that sure. She didn't tell her anything about seeing anyone from school, even if she knew Jay hooked up with some of the guys, but it was so unimportant she didn't even remember which ones.

'What do you think?' asked Nicole as she was done with her makeup.

'No bruise,' said Jay before she smiled, 'You look really amazing, Nicole.'

It made Nicole hate herself a bit for being so annoyed with how pretty Jay was when she was this sincere about her.

'Thank you, Jay. You look pretty too.'

She rolled her eyes like every pretty girl which was told she was pretty all her life.

The party was on nine like every party, but people didn't start showing up until ten and those who really knew shit about parties came at eleven.

She successfully managed to avoid David every chance she got. Jay was keeping her busy. She could see confusion on her friends' faces when they saw the blonde, but of course the guys quickly wanted to chat her up.

She didn't budge and stuck mostly to Nicole.

'God, Nicole, this party is awesome as always,' said Kim as she and her boyfriend Matt who was hugging her from behind came to greet her and Jay. So far Nicole was pretty sober which was new since she usually was the first one to get hammered.

The black haired girl winked at her as she handed her boyfriend a beer can, 'Thanks, Nicole.'

'Jay, you look so pretty,' said the girl next looking at the blonde. Jay thanked her and told her she looked nice too. Kim was wearing jeans and a shirt. Nothing too revealing, but she was the golden girl she couldn't wear anything too slutty of course.

Several of the cheerleaders came toward them. They started to talk to Jay all thrilled about having her on the team. Nicole could see how excited the redhead was about Jay being on the team. All the cheerleaders quickly tried to be fast friends with her. People were just drawn to Jay because she was pretty. People loved pretty things.

This is how she always felt when she was around. Jay didn't even have to do anything. She was always the natural beauty who got everyone's attention. She was always the fat girl with braces, who had to work hard every day to look good and be accepted by people. It took one Jay's smile all the boys were weak and girls wanted to be her friends like Kim. That was just the true.

Jill came up to her with a shot in her hand, 'You ready?'

She instantly took it ignoring any look Jay might have sent her way and bottomed it, 'Let's get hammered!'

She lost Jay a little bit after that. She was mostly hanging out with the cheerleaders now while she, Jill and few other people were playing beer pong at her dad's dinner table.

It was easy to feel good when she was without Jay. No more judging or being overlooked. She could be herself and people got her. Jay got her too, but not when they were in public. In public people looked passed her to see Jay. On her own she could finally be herself.

Jill got her to the table to drink. Jay refused. She was by her fifth shot when suddenly she noticed David with Kyle walk in.

'Drama,' said Jill into her ear as David walked to her. She didn't tell Jill what happened or anyone besides Jay, but she kind of wanted to. She wanted to make a scene and call the two assholes pussies for bailing on her like that.

David walked up to her and tried to hug her which was the weirdest thing ever, she didn't let him, 'What are you drinking?' she asked looking down at her nail pretending to be nonchalant. Like hell she was going to give him the time of her day after he pulled that stun.

He shrugged his shoulders, 'I…I want to apologize for what happened. I'm sorry. I wrote you a couple of texts, did you get them?'

'Sure,' she said and started to pour some more shots, Nicole noticed Kyle sitting down besides Jay on the coach.

The blonde shot him an annoyed look and tried to stood up, but the asshole put his hands around her shoulders and pulled her closer.

She felt oddly nervous all of the sudden sobering out a bit. The scene felt oddly familiar.

'Nicole, come on. I…we're friends,' he said.

Nicole rolled her eyes and shot him a look, 'Sure, David, besties.'

When she turned back around she found Kyle and Jay gone. Now she felt really weird. She looked around, but in the crowd of drunk teens she couldn't see the blonde halo she knew so well.

'Nicole,' said David and took her hand.

She broke free, 'Just fuck out!'

Nicole felt odd running through the teens who were dancing and making out and doing shots and drugs around her. She felt seriously weird being this sober and worried about Jay. She wasn't even sure why she felt that way. It wasn't like Kyle would…would he?

She rushed to Matt, 'Hey, did you see Jay anywhere?'

'Uh, yeah, I think she went upstairs,' he pointed at the stairs.

She quickly ran the stairs. More people. She felt so weird, like she had to find Jay right now.

'Hey, did anyone see Jay McClaud? Or Kyle?'

'Kyle's inside the room with some chick,' said one of the football player. She always kicked the door as she was trying to get inside, 'Jay!JAY!'

When Kyle finally opened he looked upset, 'What the hell, Nicole?'

She pushed the door with such a force it hit the wall. The girl inside who was lying on the bed made a startled flinch.

Nicole blinked surprised, 'Who the fuck are you?'

'Johny's baby sister Tess,' said Kyle, 'Now, if you excuse us, we have some business to attend to. Unless you want to join, Nickie?'

'Don't call me that unless you want to get kicked out. Where the fuck is Jay?'

'I don't know she went somewhere to the bathroom.

'I saw her going to your room,' said the young girl who was definitely not sixteen.

Nicole looked at her and Kyle again, but the girl didn't look like she was somewhere she didn't want to be. The latina quickly left to her room. The room was empty, but the window was open so she went to look outside.

'Jay?'

Movement.

'Y-yeah?'

'Are you okay? What are you doing up there?' she asked.

She couldn't see her but she heard some movement so she had to be upstairs, 'Nothing, just looking at the sky.'

Nicole gripped the window frame. She wasn't a fan of heights even on the second floor.

'Want me to go down?' asked the blonde after a moment.

'Yeah,' admitted the girl and went back into the room to sit on her bed. She was so confused. Why did she act like this? Jay would kick Kyle's ass if he tried something.

In a couple of moment Jay was safely in her room smiling at her, 'You okay? Want some water?'

Jay didn't drink at all. No surprise there.

'What were you doing?'

'Just watching the sky.'

Nicole nodded, 'I thought you went with Kyle?'

'That dick? No thanks,' replied Jay and hopped on the bed next to her. Nicole smiled a bit. It was easier to be friends if they weren't judged by people around them.

'Good thing you got better taste than that,' said Nicole and pulled out her cigarette.

'Wouldn't your dad get pissed?'

'No, Yolana might, but dad smokes too so,' replied Nicole. She lightened her smoke, 'So what you got your eyes set on someone else? I could tell you weren't feeling any guy around for a while.'

'Ah, so you do care and you're a romantic too, ha?' joked Jay.

Nicole rolled her eyes, 'Come on, don't be a…'

'Yes,' said Jay calmly before she looked at her, 'Yeah, I like someone.'

'Like ha?'

'I really like…he's not like anyone I ever met before. I can't explain it, but I think he is the first person who looks at me and sees me as more than my looks or body. He sees me as me. Not many people do,' admitted Jay.

Nicole felt like she wanted to bark at her, that she had pretty girl problems, but stopped herself because how could she say that. How could she really say that?

'Whoa, Jay likes a boy. It's a whole new world.'

'You bet,' said the blonde. They lied on her bed for a while, 'I missed you.'

'I missed you too.'

* * *

School on Monday was boring as hell. Nicole wanted to skip, but Jill wanted to see the football players' practise.

It was weird at first but she and Jay started to sit together in school along with the cheerleaders. Jay didn't looked too impressed or bothered by it constantly texting. It didn't took her long to know who she was texting with.

At one point she looked up and winked at her.

Nicole smirked knowing that despite all the people around them. She was the only one who knew about Jay's mysterious boyfriend.

It wasn't until one of the football players came and sat down next to Jay putting his arm over her shoulder, 'Hey, what's the pretty smile for.'

'Get off me,' she said and pushed his arm away only for him to grab her knee, 'Come on. Pretty girl.'

Jay elbowed him and stood up, 'Sorry, it got crowed. See you guys later.'

Apparently it wasn't always fun to be the pretty girl.

She stood up and walked after her earning a grumpy sound from Jill.

'Hey, wait up, Jay.'

They spent most of the time after that other. It was like it used to be. Yet different.

* * *

The week went by before she could even notice. It usually did.. Week was boring only Fridays and weekends were the only days where anything interesting happened. Jay said she had a date so she went with Jill and the others to the club.

She wondered why Jay since they rebounded didn't make her promise not to take anything. She could see how annoyed she was, and how she wanted to tell her something, but in the end she didn't say anything.

Why?

She was confused until she figured out, Jay probably knew it wouldn't do any good. It wasn't like Nicole would stop just cause Jay asked her to. She was too far gone, and yet not enough. It wasn't like she needed to take something every day, just when she wanted to get wild and feel alive, or when she was down because of something which happened with her dad or mom.

One of the guys she usually bought from started to dance with her in the club, 'Hey, I have a sample for you to try.'

She turned around and smirked at him, 'Sure.'

He led her outside to the alley, she was glad her knee finally healed so she could wear a shirt. She noticed a couple of guys she didn't know. She felt a bit uneasy about it until she noticed one of the guys pulled a girl with him. She looked like she had enough as she was barely standing on her own.

'I like your jacket,' she told Nicole as they were in the back.

Nicole smirked, 'Thanks.'

The guy pulled the girl closer as they surrounded the dealer, Max. Nicole noticed how one of the guys, an older man, was checking out her legs and brushing his lips with his fingers. Suddenly the night that she couldn't remember came back, and she remembered someone helping her into a room. She felt someone's arm over the shoulders as they helped her upstairs.

She shivered despite the jacket.

'So you want some?' asked Max pulling out a small bag with some pills.

'Sure,' she said and brushed her hair a bit. The old guy chuckled. She felt like herself again.

'What about my pay?' asked the guy and she rolled her eyes pulling cash out of her jacket.

'No,' said the girl and whispered something to her guy.

Nicole felt even weirder now. She gripped the money in her hand, 'Problem?'

'She wants your jacket?'

She chuckled, 'Eh, this jacket costs more than your stuff.'

The girl looked at her guy and he smirked, 'But we want the jacket.'

'Well, I'm not giving it.' She had her name sew into the material. Like hell, she was giving it up.

She turned around to return to the club, when the older guy blocked her way, 'Now, come on don't leave yet.'

She tried to play it cool, even if on the inside she was already pretty worried, 'Well, this is not cool.'

'Jacket, now,' said the guy leaving no room for arguing.

She knew it wouldn't be a good idea, but she found herself pulling her favourite piece of clothing down her shoulders and throwing it at the skinny bitch who was smiling at her like they were friends or something.

Just her fucking luck. She will lose her jacket and a supplier.

She went for the door again, but the guy wouldn't let her, 'Now, come on, let's have a little bit fun, hm?'

'Sorry, I'm not into generics.'

He looked pissed, 'Well, don't you have a mean little mouth?'

She smirked to hid her anxiety, 'Yeah, well, it's a part of my charm. Now move.'

'I don't think so,' he took her hand.

She pushed him off annoyed, 'I said back off!'

'Okay, how about one kiss?' asked the guy trying to pull her closer.

'How about not?' she asked and kicked him into the groin. He hissed and stumbled leaving her plenty of time to run for it, but the moment she touched the door, she sensed the stranger feeling she never felt before.

'Fucking bitch!' called Max, and tried to catch her but before he could he was thrown to the side.

Nicole turned around shocked as she recognized the figure in the dark.

The guy and the girl with her jacket screamed and ran for it from the alley while the giant turtle took care of the old guy still in pain from her kick. He man managed to get to their feet afterwards and run the hell from it, while Nicole and the turtle stayed with their eyes on each other.

She felt hypnotized by him as she watched him stand there. She was desperate to know what was going through his head, 'Try stay out of dark alley, junky girl.'

Well, she had no idea what he was thinking but _that_ was definitely not something she expected.

Nicole watched him jump on one of the containers. She quickly grabbed a nearby bottle and threw it close to him on the wall, 'Hey, don't fucking call me a junky! You know nothing about me.'

With one quick jump was suddenly in front of her and caused her to backoff into the nearby wall, 'Oh yeah? I know you're a spoiled little princess. What daddy issues? Is that why you need to get high and drunk and fuck dirtbags like the punk that left you in an dirty alley with two dealers?' he spat at her. She felt her heart beating faster. He had no right to talk to her like that. And how the fuck did he knew that?

'Who are you? My personal fanboy stalker?' she asked snapping back at him. She could see his eyes. They were green and pierced into hers. He was breathing hard as well. Would he hit her? Would he do something to her? She threw a bottle at him after she already watched him beat up three men.

His eyes suddenly moved lower to her breast. He liked her. She could tell. He liked her a lot. It made him mad. It was frustrating because it made her mad and like him too.

She reached out, grabbed some strap which was over his chest and pulled him toward her. She was tall with the heels, but it wasn't enough. She stood on her toes. He looked confused for a split second before she smashed their lips together. She kissed him hungrily. She wanted to be in charge, she wanted to be the one in control. It was easy to guess that it was his first kiss, yet, he tried to kiss her back. It was inexperienced but still she enjoyed it. She liked that he was careful and tried to mimic what she was doing and...how it felt.

When she broke the kiss she felt him shaking. She put her hands against his chest. He had abs and muscles. He was so solid. She loved it. She loved guys with muscles who could lift her up.

She let her hands stroke him a bit, 'Shush, it's okay.'

He looked wrecked. He was breathing hard and shaking. He looked vulnerable. He was so strong, and yet she made him melt against her. She loved the feeling.

He put his hands on her shoulder and pushed her away, 'Don't. Ever. Do. That. Again.'

'Yeah, right.'

He shoved her against the wall a bit hard, 'I mean it, I don't need a freaking junky whore to own me any favours. Stay out of my way.'

He took a step back, his face told her everything she needed to know as he rushed away. She watched him leave smirking.

* * *

Raph got home. He almost knocked Donnie out of the way as he went into his room. He punched a wall outside of the alley. His head hurt from thinking so hard about the girl. What the actual hell?

He lied down on his bed. He didn't even realize he left the door open when Leo appeared inside his room, 'You okay?'

He pulled his hands away from his eyes and stood up, 'Fantastic.'

'Did something happen?' said his noble and amazing in every way brother. Of course he was the perfect turtle, leader, ninja, brother, son. Freaking everything.

'Look, fuckoff, Leo. Nothing happened,' barked Raph at him and went to the punching bag. He wanted to let out some steam, and if Leo didn't leave him the hell alone he would use him as a punching bag.

Leo just stood in the doorway and watched him. It made him crazy, 'What?!'

'Nothing, but I'm here if...you know.'

He laughed at his face, 'Right, like you wanted to talk when you got yourself a girlfriend. Just get out, okay? Leave me the hell alone!'

He started to punch the bag mercilessly not caring if Leo was still in the room or not. He was done with talking, he needed actions now.

He needed to forget about Leo having the perfect life.

He needed to forget about how he was stuck inside the sewer with his brothers for the rest of his life.

He needed to forget about people screaming and running when he saw him.

Above all he needed to forget about the one girl who didn't and the kiss...

FUCKING JUNKY!

And fucking junky who kissed him out of the blue in the dark alley after he stalker her and saved her twice now.

The bag was ripped when he was done with it.

He was soaked in sweat and exhausted so he went for a shower. Everyone was probably in their rooms by now. He didn't know what time it was but it must have been late (well early in the morning).

The water in the shower was cold, but it was for the best. He kept on thinking about the girl when he shouldn't. Stupid junky.

He sighed. He was always the hothead. He always blew up and then calmed down feeling shitty. He always did reckless stuff when he exploded and then felt shitty about it. He was dick to his brothers sometimes even attacked them and got into a fight...still...

 _Whore_

She was a girl and no matter what she did he didn't have the right to call her _that_. She kissed him. Maybe she was high or it was a prank or whatever maybe she was grateful...but he didn't have the right to call her a whore.

He walked out of the shower and found his father sitting on the chair in the living room looking at something on the wall. Nothing was there so Raph assumed he was just think. He got down and went to sit down in front of him.

'Feeling better, my son?' he asked calmly.

'Not really, I hate it when I explode like that. Without think it through.'

His father nodded, 'You have a hot blood inside you. Just like Leo, he is just better in control.'

'Yeah, right, Leo is the monk among us. He goes not get angry ever.'

'I think he gets angry more time than you would think, which is the reason you two always end up fighting. Donatello and Michelangelo never fight.'

Raph thought about it for a moment, 'I hate apologizing.'

'No one likes to admit their mistake, my son. But if you feel bad about it, it wasn't a wise decision,' said his father even if he didn't have to. Raph wasn't a kid anymore, he knew what he did was wrong, he just never could stop himself before he actually did it. He couldn't only fix up the mess afterwards.

He nodded at his father, 'Good night.'

'Good night, my son. Morning will be better. I promise.'

Raph nodded. His father was rarely wrong. He walked into his room and lied down on the bed. It took a while for the sleep to come as he was still think about the latina with the most haunting eyes he had ever seen. He looked at them and it was like he was looking into something pure dark.

When Mikey asked Leo about his girlfriend, he described her as if she carried a light inside her. Well, if this _Jay_ chick was light, the girl from the alleys, was definitely dark. He could tell that there was something reckless and daring and dangerous in her eyes, and it made him want to drown inside it.

He fell asleep with his hands on his body thinking about her lips on his and how he never felt like that before. He fell asleep playing with that thought of not stopping her. Her kisses, touches, looks and words. If he didn't stop her what else would she do? Where else would she touch him and kiss him?

* * *

Nicole returned to the club after she was sure the giant turtle was gone. She was furious beyond belief. Not only did she lost her jacket, a good supplier, but..BUT!

Whore. A whore? What a fucking asshole! Who does he think he was some virgin boy?

She was so fucking upset. No drugs, no jacket and some ugly asshole calling her a junky and now a whore?

She knocked into someone.

'Hey, Nicole, sorry,' said Matt cheerfully. She looked him up and down. He was alone for once. Now perfect redhead girlfriend with perfect hair and family and friends around.

'Where's Kim?'

'At home. I came here with some guys from team. What about you? Fake ID?' he asked joking. He was always like this. Nice, easygoing and joking. She remembered him from some parties back in the days. She used to have a crush on him until she found out he was too much of a goodie goodie for her. Maybe not such a goodie if he was drunk in a club without his girlfriend.

She licked her lips. She needed something, 'Got some time?' she asked and took his hand and dragged him to the toilets.

'Hey, Nicole, come on, I had something to drink. I really don't want this,' he said and stopped them. What was it with guys today? First the asshole who probably will never find a girl as hot as her and now Matt? She really needed to get high before she has a complete breakdown from this.

She let go of him, 'Sure, right...why would you? You're dating the perfect girl, and I'm not a pretty one like Jay or fucking perfect like Kim.'

'Nicole, are you okay?' asked Matt and brushed her hair, 'Let's go, come on. Let's talk.'

He guided her outside into another alley.

'My cars over there,' he said and guided her slowly into his car. It was a silver BMW. She brushed her hair, and Matt pulled out some weed.

'You smoke?' asked Nicole surprised.

'Just sometimes. You look like you need some,' he said as he handed over to her. She quickly took the lighter from him too and lightened it up.

'Thanks,' she said as she felt the smoke doing into her lungs and then out, 'This is good.'

When she hand it back to him to share he asked, 'So what happened?'

She shook her head, 'Nothing. I just hate to be around people sometimes.'

'People like Jay and Kim?'

She shrugged her shoulders, 'And Jill and Carrie. You named them. I just fucking hate them all sometimes,' she pressed her head against the backseat.

He watched her for a moment before he passed it back to her, 'I sometimes want to be without them too.'

'Please little Ms. Perfect is always on your shoulder. She must be the next best things since...well weed.'

He chuckled, 'Not always. She's so stressed sometimes. Always have good grades, always have people liking her and everyone be pleased. She tends to forget about herself.'

'What isn't she a real Mother Teresa.'

'It's not just that. It's like an obsession. It's like she thinks people will like her less.'

Nicole started at the join, 'It's probably true. People tend to have this way of seeing you. If you change they get upset.'

Mark chuckled, 'What's up with you today?'

'Nothing just my typical reckless as hell self,' replied and brushed her forehead.

'No, that was actually deep, Nicole. I'm impressed,' he said and smiled at her.

She rolled her eyes, 'Jeez, thanks, captain McDreamy.'

'Captain McDreamy?'

'Please, like you don't know all the freshman's are into you.'

'Oh, all freshman? '

'Duh,' she said and smirked at him. He suddenly leaned closer and kissed her. Maybe they were just a bit too high. Either way they kissed for a while. It was nice until his hand went into her skirt.

 _For a moment, she remembered someone helping her up the stairs. She only saw her and his shoes moving through the stairs._

 _'Great party, Nicole!' shouted someone and she raised her cup not even seeing clearly who it was._

 _She then remembered someone lying on the bed, 'I'm too drunk for this...'_

 _She felt someone's hand in her shirt._

Nicole pushed him away for a moment having trouble breathing. She blame it on the weed, 'Okay, that just proves it. Some people are overrated.'

'Come here,' he said and kissed her again, but she was totally not feeling it.

She pushed him away again, 'Okay, that's enough.'

Nicole easily opened the door, 'See you cheater.'

'You? Nicole, what the fuck? You're a freaking tease!' he called after her angry.

The girl smirked, 'Make up your mind boys because I can't be a whore and a tease.'

She decided to walk. That night she lost her jacket, her dignity (which she didn't knew she had left) and perhaps something else too. Something which oddly reminded her of her heart. Funny she didn't knew she had that either.

In a cold night wearing her partying clothes it took her ten minutes of walking before she took a cap home.

When she came home she changed her clothes undid her makeup and went to bed. She was ready for the sleep to kick in when she got the text. She wanted to ignore it, but as he phone continued to lightened in the dark she snatched it and opened the text.

She froze.

 _You should stay away from him._

Apart from the text there was a photo with her and Matt in his car kissing.

Well, shit!

* * *

Raph apologized to Donnie after he slept a couple of hours. His brother didn't look too upset in fact he had forgotten all about it.

He cooked dinner. They talked a bit about Mikey's online friend who turned out to be a chick. Funny. Raph definitely had his money on it being a guy from Texas named Trevor like last time.

Donnie surprised him with hacking into her computer. He looked over at Leo who was looking at him suspiciously. Now they bother wondered if Donnie didn't hack Jay as well. He most likely did just to be sure.

He hoped the lunch was an apology for the past couple of days. No one seemed to complain too much or hold a grudge. He was lucky they always forgave him so quickly.

When he was finishing the dishes, since he refused the help of the others, Master Splinter came and put something on the counter next to him.

'I found this today in the bathroom,' he said calmly as usual.

Raph looked over and froze. It was a small golden chain bracelet with _Nicole_ nicely written on it. It must have got strapped to his strap when she pulled him for the kiss or put her hands on him. He looked over at his father.

'I don't know what that is.'

His father watched him for a moment. He was sure he would call him out on his lie, but he just nodded, 'I see, then perhaps you might throw it away when you will go to the patrol. It's pointless to keep.'

The lie left a bad taste in his mouth as it was clear Master Splinter knew he was lying. Leo hid his girlfriend for months and he would be damn if he would do the same. Not that the girl was his girlfriend.

'I only saved her...the bracelet. I didn't notice it was on my clothes.'

His father smiled a bit, 'Then if it was a random act just return it to the place you saved the girl. I am sure she will go looking for it.'

He nodded and finished the dishes not daring to look at the little item until he was fully done. Once he was he took it and frowned at it.

 _This will get me in so much trouble. I can tell already._

He could tell from the moment the girl didn't scream and it proved itself to be true when she pressed her lips against his and kissed him making his mind go blank.

The girl he saved and insulted twice now.

 _Nicole_

* * *

Despite his brothers' belief Raph had some sense of reasoning. He could tell when something was a bad idea even if he eventually went with it. He had some common sense, just didn't listen to it enough to save himself.

So of course, he knew that going to return the bracelet to the chick's house was a bad idea. Like super bad. He tried to leave it in the alley, but realized, the girl probably already went to go look for it and it was a school night. He scanned the place. His best bet was to go to the balcony. Problem? He had no idea which balcony was hers. So he did the next stupid thing after giving in and going to return the bracelet to her house, stalking her. Yup, he was sitting on the opposite building waiting for her to come out on the balcony so he could wait until she was asleep before he would leave the thing in her balcony. Good plan, still stupid.

It didn't take as long as he expected for her to come out and smoke. At least she was smoking outside. He noticed she was wearing normal home clothes for once, not short skirts or dresses. Sure, it was hot to look at, but it was November it was freaking cold.

She went inside and he waited. He waited until the lights went out and finally it looked like most of the residence went to sleep.

He easily jumped to the balcony. There were some flowers and a fancy looking chairs and table. This was his chance he would leave the bracelet on the table and leave. Problem solved.

It would have been easy if a pigeon didn't just scare the crap out of him. It caused him to flinch and in the next moment an ashtray was on what looked like a very nice carpet.

'Shit!'

'What are you doing?' asked suddenly the girl stranding by the open door to the balcony. How the hell did he managed to not notice her coming?

'Uh,' he said looking from the mess on the carpet to her. She was dressed definitely different then the two times he met her. She was wearing a long Mets jersey. As far as he could tell her hair wasn't straightened like she had before also even with the only light coming from the small lamp inside, he could tell she was not wearing makeup.

'I came to return this,' he said and showed her the bracelet.

She blinked surprised and took a step closer but then stopped and looked up at him. He understood the hesitance the was a dick to her. How could she not?

'I…,' he started. Gosh, he sucked so much at this.

'Was it in the alley?' she asked. Her voice wasn't as confident as it was before.

'No, it got caught in my strap,' said Raph and shook his hand a bit. She took the bracelet taking the little item into her hand, 'Thank you.'

She brushed it a bit, 'Now, that is a bit unfair. Now you know my actual name and not just junky whore. I still have to call you hero dick,' she said, but it wasn't mean. It was in a good nature.

He swallowed a bit. Hero, yeah right, a hero doesn't call a girl a whore, 'I'm Raph.'

'Raph?' she repeated but not in a mocking matter.

'Raphael,' he added feeling weird about it, 'But only…it's nothing, sorry about the carpet,' he said as she leaned down and picked the astray. He took a step closer to her not sure if to help or not. She looked so different now.

'It's fine,' she said as he kneeled down as well. She quickly rushed to her room and came back with a small little device which turned out to be a vacuum.

'I messed the carpet like 3x a week so don't stress it,' said the brunette slowly vacuuming the ash from the carpet.

They were quiet for a while as she cleaned before she spoke, 'Do you ever feel like whatever you do there is someone who is always better than you? Like in every single thing?'

He chuckled, 'Almost as much as I lose control and do reckless shit.'

She looked at him and once again he could see the darkness which was appealing to him. He realized that in must have been the reason why it so pulled him toward her. They were kind of the same.

She smiled a bit, 'Ah, so we're made of the same damaged goods.'

'Guess so,' he stood up just as she did when the carpet was clean.

'Thanks for the bracelet. I know I'm a spoiled rich princess, but this is the only thing that actually matter to me,' she said, 'It was my grandma. Also Nicole.'

'It's a nice name,' felt out of his mouth before he could stop himself.

She smiled a bit wider, 'Thanks. I won't bother you.'

'Well, that depends only if you continue to go to dark alleys with shady folks.'

'I wish I could say I wouldn't, but I don't really know. Blame it on the recklessness,' said Nicole before she started to put the bracelet back on her wrist.

'Need help?' he asked not sure how he with his three fingers could help her put on a bracelet, but Nicole just smirked.

'Please I can do my eyelashes while playing Candy Crush. This is nothing.'

He crossed his arms, 'Well, aren't you a skillful princess.'

She looked up at him as the bracelet made a clicking sound.

'Wouldn't you want to know?' she winked at him. He felt something inside him tremble. It was like was drawn to it. No one ever flirted with him…definitely not a girl as hot as her.

'I should go,' he said telling himself he needed to go on patrol. He couldn't waste anymore time.

'See you around,' said Nicole.

' No we won't,' replied Raph.

'Why?'

'People like you don't hang out with turtles like me.'

She crossed her arms, 'You should be careful about that. When people say stuff like that. I usually do the exact opposite.'

He shook his head, 'Bye Nicole.'

'See you around, Raphael,' she said and he could hear the tone of her voice was daring. Like she was telling him, she would definitely find a way to see him.

Oddly it made him smirk.

'You wish princess,' he said and jumped from the balcony before she could say anything else.

When he dared to look at her for a moment, she was still standing on the balcony looking at him. He had a feeling he was in for a whole lot of trouble.


	7. The Popular Girl 03

**The Popular Girl**

* * *

She is both, hellfire and holy water. And the flavor you taste depends on how you treat her.

* * *

Nicole's curtains got abruptly pulled apart revealing the morning sun, 'Rise and shine, chica.'

Her mother smiled at her before she walked to her bed, 'Don't be late for school.'

Nicole rolled her eyes and yawned. Her room was a mess. She still hadn't bother to clean it. They had a maid, but since she once threw out Nicole's favourite lipstick she was afraid to be in the girl's room for too long.

'Hey, mom, how are you?' Nicole had to ask since she hadn't seen her mom for over a week due to her trip to the Alps.

'Fantastic dear. I have to tell you all about the new ski resort. We should absolutely go next month.'

'Sounds fun,' said Nicole and started to get ready. She pulled out some clothes from her closet.

'Oh, that is a cute top. Is it new?' asked her mom already taking it from her.

Nicole turned to look at her. Her mother had a habit of taking Nicole's clothes for herself. She couldn't really blame her since she knew it meant she had very good taste.

'I think I will take it to school, mom,' she said as her mother already took the top closer, 'It's so pretty.'

She already recognized the look in her mother's eyes and sighed, 'Just take it.'

'You're so nice to me, chica,' said her mother and hugged her. She sometimes wondered if she was really her mom or some friend or sister. She definitely never acted like a mother as far as Nicole could remember.

She picked another top. It was always like this. She always came and took something Nicole loved wearing it for herself. Nicole guessed that was just the way some moms were.

She took a quick shower and started to work on her makeup. It took her about twenty minutes to be satisfied with how she looked before she moved to her hair. She untangled it and made it straight. She debated about making curls today, but decided she wasn't feeling like it and went for her classic look.

After the put on her clothes she made sure she looked good before she walked outside to her car. It was a birthday gift for her seventeen birthday since the car before she managed to accidentally crash a bit too much into the nearby fence at her dad's neighbourhood. She wasn't allowed to drive for a while after that but then her parents finally let her do it.

Nicole drove to the building quickly texting.

 _Come down here._

She brushed her hair a bit and checked her teeth in the mirror if she didn't have any lipstick there. It was a moment before she walked the blonde walked out from the building.

Jay was wearing her usual clothes and a bit warmer jacket today. Her hair was in messy curls which were dancing in the wind as she walked into Nicole's car. She didn't do anything special with her hair or put on makeup, yet she looked stunning.

Jay just had one of those faces and bodies which always made her look like a model from a magazine. Natural beauty.

'Hey.'

'Hi.'

It was very annoying at times.

* * *

Honestly to God Raph was sure his brother was turning into a sap. He had this ridiculous look on his face whenever his phone got a message. He was trying to play it out cool or whatever, but damn did he suck at this. He honestly was turning into this sappy guy. What the hell? What did this chick bashed her eyelashes at him and he went from a normal turtle to this wreck?

 _Ridiculous. Pathetic._

He put down his weight and clenched his fist thinking about what happened a couple of weeks ago. A couple of weeks. Ha. Three weeks to be exact. He hasn't heard or seen Nicole since, which was good. It was what he wanted. It was what he made sure would be the case as he purposely made a look out for her and avoided Upper East Side like a plague. He still couldn't believe he told her his name, or returned the bracelet or let her kiss him. Like seriously. He was messed up in the head or something.

He rolled his eyes feeling the unknown anger return, he took his weights again and started to work out turning his music louder than before earning a couple of bangs from both Leo and Donnie, but he tuned them out and continued to focus on his work out pushing everyone including the latino vixen out of his mind. It was pointless to think about her anyway, so why bother? It wasn't like he would ever see her again. Even though she gave him that look and said she would just _no_. He was never ever going to see her again. He wasn't about to make her right besides what would be the point.

He continued to workout for almost an hour feeling better afterwards. It was all he needed in the end to calm down his anger a bit, a good workout with zero distractions.

Raph walked out of his room ready for a shower. It was some time around noon so his brothers should be asleep or waking up since they would go on patrol in a couple of hours. As he returned he casually peaked around to see what everyone was doing.

Their father was currently in his _I am watching my tv shows do not dare to disturb me_ time of the day as Raph recognized the black haired dude and chick on the screen of the tv talking about something and Master Splinter's eyes glued to it.

Mikey was in his room, as the door was opened, and he could hear him screaming at someone, 'I lost ammo, Mo! No ammo! MOOOOO!'

'Michelangelo, if you do not tune it down I shall throw your game out! It's tv shows time!' shouted Master Splinter without taking his eyes of the couple on the screen.

'Sorry, sensei!' called back Mikey visibly lowering his voice afterwards.

He noticed light coming from Donnie's workshop/lab which was situated a bit further in the tunnel. He had his own room, but eventually he spent so much time in his little workplace they pushed one of the old couches there so he could just sleep there if he was too tired to return to his room. His desk was full with empty cups of coffee he hadn't washed yet, he was working on some device Raph had no idea what could possible do.

Knowing he probably annoyed him with his music he walked over and took about five mugs and brother them to the kitchen where he made him a new cup.

He returned and placed it down next to his smartest brother. Donnie blinked at the sound so close to his face. He looked up pulling off the goggles and looked at the desk now free of empty mugs, then at the new one and then at Raph a bit surprised.

'Oh, thanks, Raph.' Of course he didn't even notice Raph took the mugs, he was so caught up in his work sometimes it was like the rest of the work fade away.

'No problem, bro,' he walked away. He returned to the kitchen and with nothing better to do he actually started to wash them. Donnie was such a pig sometimes.

Despite scolding Donnie for not noticing the whole mugs thing, he also failed to noticed when did Leo showed up until he heard his brother's fingers typing something at his phone. No doubt to his new chick.

Raph rolled his eyes, 'Isn't she in school or something?'

He rarely mentioned the girl unless they were fighting. It wasn't like he wanted to fight right now, he just figured he could ask.

Leo looked at him for a moment probably wondering if it was a start of an another fight.

'She has a lunch break,' he said and Raph nodded to himself.

'How old is she?'

'17 like us,' he said calmly. Raph finished the last mug and put it to dry before he turned to look at him, 'So when are we going to meet her? Or is she just a fling?' he asked crossing his arms.

He could see Leo's visible distaste about discussing this with him. He didn't blame him he was a dick about the whole thing since the start, but honestly what did he expect? All this time every and each one of them was told not to ever let himself be seen, and he comes fearless getting himself a girlfriend? Rules don't apply when you are the favourite or what?

He kept on staring at him wondering if Leo will argue or just not talk about it. His brother always trying to avoid conflict when Raph wanted to further it, decided to just stood up and walk. He was past the kitchen corner when Raph heard he got another message.

Clearly this would either end with them breaking up or Raph accepting it once and for all. None of the two seemed very likely in the moment.

He returned to his room afterwards and played some drums until Master Splinter hushed him as well.

* * *

Nicole was blowing her gum all the way through cheer practise while Jill was on the phone with her older guy. Honestly Nicole wasn't a fan of the cheerleaders, but she and Jay agreed to hang out a bit after school so she was waiting for her. She had to admit, her blonde friend was freaking amazing even though she was new at this. Jay always had a sense a rhythm and was very good with making it all look easy and fun which was good in cheerleading.

The raven haired girl looked around. The place was empty. Boys were forbidden to be on practises since they were always disturbing the girls. She could tell most of the girls were relieved. Most of the guys were pigs so not surprising.

She kept on wandering with her eyes back to her bracelet.

She remembered the kiss in the alley and the way he looked at her when he returned it. In the alley he was a dick so was she, when he returned it...it was...well nice. It had been three stupid weeks with no contact.

 _Fucking prick of a turtle!_

Sure he knew where she lived and hung out, but holy shit was he playing the game slow! Nicole liked to think of herself as a good seductress. She got seduced a lot, but she had her fair share of victories as well. She got it, okay? Not every guy wanted her or to fuck, but this... _turtle guy_ oh he wanted her. She could feel it. She might have been drunk and high, but she totally sensed him being all for it at one point. If he would just damn it show up again, she was sure things would go her way.

If only...

It was then that she heard the door open and a couple of basketball players came inside.

She rolled her eyes as she watched them ogling the girls knowing Jay was one of them.

 _Don't get your panties in a twist guys. She's just one girl._

It took a couple of more minutes before the practice was over probably to the unwanted attention.

Jay walked up to her and took the water bottle Nicole was keeping her for her, 'So how was it?'

'Hot,' said Nicole with a smirk and Jay chuckled. Jill was still on the phone. She had been talking with that guy a lot lately. At one point she noticed Nicole looking at her and teasingly licked her lips.

Nicole chuckled.

'So where do you want to go afterwards? Pizza?' asked Jay catching her attention again.

Before Nicole could answer, a boy named Chris stopped by Jay. He had been approaching her a couple of times a week. Maybe it was because Jay had started being social again as she joined the squad. He tried to put his hand over her arms, but she stepped away quickly giving him the stink eye.

'Hey, Barbie,' he said grinning like an idiot. Nicole could tell this loser was in for a treat as Jay _hated_ nicknames like that.

'Listen, I was thinking if maybe you aren't busy this weekend we could hang out.'

'I have a boyfriend.'

Nicole blinked and even Jill paused from her phone sex with her older hottie to look at the blonde. Sure, over the last three weeks Jay mentioned her boyfriend Leo, a guy who didn't go to their school, quite a lot. It was always little things like what did you do last night? Watched a movie with Leo, or texted with Leo all night and stuff like that. She didn't even show Nicole his photo, but she was pretty serious about the guy. Yet, it was strange to hear. Jay McClaud. The ice queen said she has a guy so casually and naturally without a single beat.

Chris looked surprised for a moment before he smirked, 'Well, okay, still, the offer stands.'

'I'm pretty sure you're going out with Lisa? Your girlfriend,' said Jay giving again the cold expression her face showing him no mercy. Jay was a total no BS when it came to guys and cheaters especially. Nicole really loved when Jay was all ice cold, because she could be fire hot then.

Chris now definitely looked shaken, 'Maybe it could be our little secret?'

That was when Jay gripped her bottle, 'I gave you enough reasons why I will _not_ hang out with you. Leave me, before it gets ugly.'

 _Merciless._ That was what Nicole thought as she watched Chris being hit by that like a bag of bricks before the realization of what she said sunk in. He looked like he didn't even know how to make a good comeback so he just flipped her a quick birdie and called her a bitch.

Nicole watched him make a step before she couldn't hold it anymore and burst into laughter, 'Jesus Christ, that was golden!' She laughed for a couple of moments as Jay packed her things urging her to go. Before you ask, yes, Nicole had a little bit of weed before going to practice today. It probably just kicked in.

As Jay went to change and Nicole parted with Jill, who told her they were going to a party tonight, she spotted Matt walking from the exit toward her.

She froze for a moment as he looked at her and frowned looking away. He walked passed her as if she was invisible before he rushed to Kim who put her arms around him and kissed him telling him something which made him laugh.

Nicole stomach dropped as she got hit with the realization a couple of moments ago Jay was confronted with the possibility to cheat. Nothing major just hanging out. Sure Chris was a dick, but he was very good looking and as far as Nicole's drunk mind remembers from the party at the end of the last school year not a bad kisser.

Jay chose to be faithful for her Leo and for Lisa, Nicole…Nicole was Nicole, who kissed and made out with Matt in his car knowing he had a girlfriend, the perfect Kim Sawyer captain of the cheerleader and class president and every other title imaginable.

Something moved by her side, and she turned around only to find Molly Jones looking weirdly at her.

'What are you staring at? Cat got your tongue? Peculiar girl?' she teased. Yes, it was a terribly low blow to the mute girl, but Nicole was a mean girl if you haven't noticed.

The girl with the pink hair watched her for a moment before she smirked and walked away from her with this weird smirk on her face, which for some reason made Nicole nervous in that moment. For all she knew Molly could be a serial killer wannabe.

The raven haired latina found herself looking away and grateful when Jay finally showed up to leave.

'Let's get out of this romcom,' she gaped earning a weirdout look from the blonde. Why were people staring at her like that today?

* * *

They walked to the pizza place in Bronx which they used to go to after dance classes and summer camps with Nicole's nannies or their moms.

It has been a while since they've been there, but luckily it still had decent enough pizza and nice interior.

As they were eating Nicole couldn't helped but asked, 'So you and this Leo guy is getting pretty serious, hm?'

A happy and completely lame in Nicole's opinion smile in came across Jay's mouth before she nodded, 'Yeah, we're in a good place now. I hope it will remain like this.'

'So you talk? I mean have you talked about past and stuff? Like your dad or your mom's weird boyfriends? The shrink?'

'Not yet, but tonight? I was a bit worried,' admitted the blonde playing with her straw in her coke now, 'I know he wouldn't think it was my fault, but it will be weird. One incident like this is bad enough but gosh there has been so many.'

Nicole nodded. Even if she felt bad about a lot of things, how could she hate Jay after the shit she has been through? All those things she told Nicole after their reconnecting not okay or fun.

It almost made Nicole want to discuss what happened to her, but she also didn't want to. Telling Jay about the party panties thing would be one thing, but the Matt thing? No way. She couldn't put Jay into a position she would have to chose if stay loyal to Nicole or honest with Kim. Mainly because Nicole wasn't sure what would Jay pick and she didn't want to lose her so soon after they started being friends again.

'What about you?' asked Jay after a moment, 'I heard someone in Bio said you don't makeout with guys anymore. Found the one?'

Nicole rolled her eyes, 'Tommy Norson? As if I would be caught dead doing something with him.'

Jay chuckled.

'No, Jay. I found the _current_ one not _the_ one. I waiting for him to finally give in and do us both a favour.'

'Whoa, a guy was didn't want to do it on the first date? Where did you find someone like him?'

'Probably where you found your _Leo_ ,' joked Nicole and continued to eat.

Jay smirked in a way which made Nicole want to ask what was so funny, but the blonde quickly said, 'So what he has been keeping his distance?'

Nicole chewed a bit before she spoke. It might not be bad to share a little bit. Sometimes talking with Jay could be very easy. If it was just the two of them.

'Well, I meet him in an alley behind a club. He's not your typical prince Charming pretty boy, but more like Shrek?' She chuckled at her own joke, 'But man, even with that he is hot...it's like I can't explain it. He's not...' _human_ , 'but he is totally something else,' _turtle_ , 'and I am _so_ into it like holy shit.'

Jay smiled a bit, 'I get that.'

'So anyway, we talked for like five minutes madeout. _Very_ intense and then he left without my number or anything which was okay since I figured it was one of those things which just happened to never happen again and well, he was kind of jerk then. Anyway a couple of days later he returned my bracelet,' she showed the bracelet for good measures, 'and it was _so_ calm absolutely not like I am use to. We just talked about _shit_ and then he left. No kiss this time. It was really just... I can't describe it, but I want to bone him _so_ bad. But the fucker is staying clear from me fighting it.'

Jay shook her head, but not in a dismissive way, just amused, 'Nicole. How could this guy not want you? I mean look at you?'

'I know, girl. These hips don't lie,' said the latina with a fake accent earning a giggle from the blonde.

'Anyway, I know that the next time we meet we'll do it, but the guy is purposely avoiding meeting me because he knows it too, and it freaks him out,' she drank a bit looking annoyed, 'Like shouldn't I be the blushing maiden not him?'

Jay raised her brows, 'Doubt you could be a blushing maiden anymore Nicole. I don't think there is anything which could surprise you during sex anymore.'

'With him there still might.' _He is a turtle after all. Does he even have a dick?_ Doesn't matter she would find a way. Two weeks ago she had try to make out with ten guys at a club only to come to a horrible conclusion that she couldn't. Every fucking time she caught a glimpse of Matt and guilt came in or she thought she remembered something from the party at the beginning of the school year. She had to know if Raph was the only one who she could kiss without any flashes.

She bit her lip. Also was the fact that she couldn't kiss guys carelessly because of what happened with Matt or what happened at the beginning of the school year.

She looked at Jay as she smiled at her before continuing to chew. Maybe...she could talk about the party with Jay. It was so easy to fall into old habits with her. It was easy to feel like they were best friends again.

'Hey, Diaz,' said a boy as he approached them with his two buddies. Nicole rolled her eyes Kyle stopped by their table.

'Jay, lovely seeing the two of you here. Can we join?'

'No thanks,' said Nicole quickly and put her bag at the empty seat, 'It's a girls date.'

'Oh, Nicky come on, don't be mean, and can we watch?'

'Don't call her that,' said Jay instantly and showed him her famous cold look she already used on Chris today, 'Like she said we want to be alone, so go.' Nicole felt something nice and warm inside her knowing Jay knew she hated the nickname so much.

Kyle frowned at Jay for a couple of minutes but seeing she was not backing down and looking over to Nicole he found no support he gave up raising his hands, 'Okay, ladies. Enjoy your food. Nicole see you at the party today.'

Nicole frowned at him before she flipped him and returned to her food, 'Fucking Kyle.'

'I thought you were friends,' said Jay as she took another slice.

'With that cradle stealer? No thanks. He's David's friend and also the dude who left me in the alley with a dealer. No afing way I am spending time purposely with those two. That was bone and go only.'

They ate for a moment before Nicole chuckled, 'What about you and Mr. Leo? You ready to fuck yet?'

'Jesus, Nicole,' said Jay chuckling and covering her mouth to spill out food. She ever blushed a bit. It was totally serious between Jay and her mystery guy.

'What? I want to know if my BF is having sex and if yes just how good is it on the scale of one to ten? If it is anything below seven you should dump him though.'

Jay wiped her mouth before she looked at the table thinking for a moment and Nicole understood jokes were over. She waited for what the blonde would say when she looked up at her and smiled, 'BF, ha?'

Nicole didn't even realize she said it until she did. Jay used to be her best friend, then her only friend, then a stranger and classmate, now they were friends again, but over the past few weeks with Jill in her relationship with the older hottie, she and Jay got really close again. Maybe it would never be the same or perfect like it used to be, but then again, maybe older friendships couldn't be like that anyway.

Nicole shrugged her shoulders, 'Duh, but don't expect a bracelet or anything.'

Jay kicked her leg lightly under the table and Nicole kicked her back. Yeah, when it was just the two of them. No people to judge or compare them to one another, it was good to have Jay back.

Nicole stole her fries, 'Lightened up, Jay.'

The worst part about Nicole's insecurities was that in the end, she loved Jay too. She got it. She got why people wanted to be so close to her. She wanted as well. She wanted to love Jay the way she could love her. Without a single bit of envy or jealousy inside her. She just... she just didn't know if she loved her more than she hated her. Or if her love was stronger than her hate. Her hate of both Jay and herself.

* * *

A few hours before the patrol Leo disappeared, which didn't go unnoticed by Raph who came to play some games with Mikey, 'So, Fearless snuck out to see his girlfriend?'

His younger brother brushed his shoulders, 'Guess it's date night.'

'Date night,' snored Raph crushing his controller a bit, 'What is that anyway? Him being in her room? What if someone walks in? Family?'

'She only lives with her mom who is not around much,' said Mikey while staring at the screen fully focused on beating his older brother.

Raph frowned, 'How you know that?'

'I asked if she has any hot sisters Leo could introduce me too,' said Mikey shrugging.

Raph was silent for a moment, 'This is just fucked up. How can you think it's okay for him to meet with some human chick?'

'Because there aren't any turtle chicks to be with?' said Mikey with a chuckle, 'Can you imagine? I don't think I wouldn't like them too much. Isn't that shallow?' asked Mikey eyes still focused on the screen.

Raph rolled his eyes, 'It's a disaster waiting to happen. You know that right?'

Mikey sighed, 'Dude, chill. Stop being so jealous about Leo's girlfriend all the time. It's getting annoying.'

'You ever think you're being too hard on Leo cause your jealous?' asked Mikey as they were in his room playing video games. It felt like a while since they did that. Raph wasn't sure why, but thought it was mostly cause Mikey spent so much time with his new friend Mo who was apparently Molly.

Raph frowned at the screen, 'This isn't about being jealous.'

Mikey grinned, 'So you admit you are a bit?'

'No, it's about Leo putting all of us at risk for what? A good fuck?' barked Raph annoyed.

Mikey paused the game, 'Now, we both know Leo would never do that just for that. He really likes this girl. He might not talk about it, or show it too much, but when he does say something about her or is texting with her. He's happy. How could that be a bad thing, Raphie?' asked the younger turtle.

Raph rolled his eyes, 'He's putting us in danger. I just freaking hate how he was always so high up his horse and now what? He decided to bent the rules for his chick and it's okay? Totally unfair.'

Mikey made a grimace, 'Is it though? It's not like he went out to find her...they sort of found each other, and honestly isn't not like we couldn't be with people if we wanted to.'

Raph looked at the controller and then back at his sibling, 'You and this Mo chick-'

'We're just friends. She's pretty cool, and I don't think I would want to mess it up,' shrugged Mikey, 'It's one thing to play games for five hours straight and another to just hung out face to face. Not many people would look at us and be all _oh you look cool, bro._ '

Raph blinked, 'So you get it. Leo made a mistake by telling her.'

Mikey grimaced, 'It wasn't a mistake. He crashed through a roof to a house. He was lucky Jay was cool enough to help him hide and get out. As for going to see her. It wasn't like he stalked her. In fact he didn't see her for several weeks until he saw her struggling with some perv on the street.'

Raph was surprised by this, 'He didn't tell me that.'

Mikey rolled his eyes, 'Dude, you're like a dynamite and Jay is your flue. No way Leo is initiating a talk with you about her. He rather have another sex talk with Master Splinter.'

Raph frowned remembering the awfully long and embarrassing talk they had after they met April for the first time. Some things were horrible even for mutants living in the sewers.

'Okay, so what he saved her and decided to meet up with her.'

Mikey shrugged, 'He wanted to make sure she was okay, and she told him she would go look for him if he didn't come again. He basically got bullied by her.'

Raph bit the inside of his cheek feeling a bit like a hypocrite. Didn't he stalk Nicole and returned her bracelet too? Well, it wasn't totally the same, and he wasn't planning to ever meet with her again, but what if he did. Once again they would talk, and well...it would get complicated. It was already weird she kissed him. Freaking junky.

Raph groaned, 'I'm not jealous about that idiot having a chick.'

'Then what? Because April knows are secret and she's fine with it, right? We trust her. I think that Leo is smart enough to know who he can trust and who not, and _Jay_ has proved she can be trusted,' said Mikey and shrugged his shoulders, 'I think you should think about it some more than just get bitchy about it. Leo…it sucks to have one of you guys upset with each other. It sucks for Leo even if he does not admit it.'

Raph looked at the paused game on Mikey's tv screen. Yeah, it did suck. Despite their differences, he and Leo and Mikey and Donnie too, they were all they had. They grew up together played and talked and trained together. He got annoyed with them a lot, but…he still well you know… _loved_ them. They were family. They were brothers.

'So you're gonna consider not being a dick about Jay? Maybe figure out why you are acting this way?' asked Mikey testing.

Raph sighed before he looked at his brother and shoved him a bit, but in a way which mean he wasn't upset, but he was showing affection, 'Since when did you get so wise, bro? That your chick teaching you how to be a proper citizen or what?'

Mikey grinned, 'Hardly, she told me the worst joke yesterday. Why does a-'

'Stop! If this is the same one as that human centipede shit from last time, I do not want to hear it.'

'Pussy,' joked Mikey earning a hit over the head.

'Au!'

'Who you calling pussy?!'

Mikey brushed his head laughing a bit, 'Okay, still it was a good joke.'

'Whatever,' said Raph but actually grinned a bit before he thought of something. They were just sitting there looking at the screen in front of him. If he wanted to he could simply tell Mikey. Their youngest brother was all sorts of things. Mostly doing pranks and annoying the whole shit out of them, but he was good at heart like the rest of them. He could listen if he really wanted to. He could give decent advice if he _really_ wanted to.

Raph opened his mouth almost ready to say something anything about Nicole to lift the weight from his shoulders, but instead Mikey's TV screen blasted with a chat box asking him if he wanted to join some game.

Raph blinked and looked over at Mikey, 'You're gonna answer or what?'

'Yeah, sure, wanna join the all star team? We still have room for one more. You can be the bait,' said Mikey enthusiastically.

Raph shoved him a bit and stood up, 'Pass.'

He threw the second controller on the bed and walked out of the room.

Maybe Mikey had a point. He was acting really immature about all of it, when really he was just upset about well…Nicole. It has been months now that Leo was seeing this chick and nothing happened so far. It has been months since he and Leo actually thought about something other than well fighting and bricking about the girl.

Okay, for the whatever reason he will try to next time he talks with Leo not be a douche. _Try_

* * *

Jill pulled Nicole closer to her.

'Can you believe that that chick is wearing?' shouted her friend as they were dancing with each other dance floor after about six shots.

'I can't believe who she's with,' shouted back Nicole before she continued to move in the rhythm of the music. She loved to dance. She always felt so carefree. She felt like she could be anything she wanted. She felt like she could be herself or whatever the hell she wanted to when she jumped around the dance floor especially if she had little something to drink before.

Jill fell a bit into her almost causing them to fall down. She knew the fierce brunette since high school. She was like the first person who recognized her Jimmy Choo shoes and was also from a relatively rich and dysfunctional family.

Nicole liked Jill. She was edgy like her, and she never felt like they were in each others' shadow. She felt good with her. She felt good with the girl as they laughed on the dance floor. She didn't try to hook up with anyone tonight. It was definitely a first for Nicole, but hey she had her eyes on the prize.

The first time Nicole had a life threatening incident she was fourteen and just started hanging out with her pseudo-mentor Lorrie. The older girl got her a fake ID and made her look a couple of years older, but with how stressed she was back there she doubted anyone really believed it. Luckily she had her cash and golden card so they let her in and stay. She was still pretty nervous about it all, and Blair kept on giving her drinks she was too amateur to handle. She barely remembered but she knew she knocked over some bottles and spilled on some guy who apparently wasn't someone you messed around with. He grabbed her hand and told her to apologize. If he would pull on a gun at her she wouldn't be surprised. She probably wouldn't even notice in her state.

She was drunk and annoyed so she showed him off her and told him to go screw himself. She used to be shy to curse in public. Those were the days.

Lorrie then pulled her toward her and hugged her proudly telling everyone she had the biggest balls around. Everyone wanted to talk with her and spent time with her. She had never been in the center of attention without Jay before, and she sort of loved it.

Still, it was the first but definitely not the last time she ended up in life threatening situations. Sometimes by her own fault something but not. A few times she got helped by her friends, two times by a giant turtle guy most of the time she could handle them herself.

Today she was walking home from a party. She had parted with Jay as she had a planned date with Leo and went to get ready for it.

She had been a bit distracted. She saw Matt there and Kyle and ended up getting drunk with Jill before she went home with some sugar daddy. Jill didn't need those but she sure as hell liked them. Her newest was by far the oldest silver fox. Jill claimed it was better than teen drama. Maybe there was some truth to it, but lately Nicole wasn't so sure what to think about drama.

Her mind was filled with the mysterious text from someone who saw her with Matt, Matt being a cheater, rebounding with Jay and of course her meeting with Raph, who she now met three times and who didn't come to see her again. Things were just weird now. She was weird now. She waited for weeks for someone to post the photos or outed her but nothing happened.

She decided to walk home for a bit. This time she at least had some stocking under her shorts and a jacket. She was still upset about her favourite one which ended up in the hands of that bitch from the club last time she went partying. It was her favourite because it had her name inside the little paper.

She was walking close to the subway remember the last time she took one her only friend was Jay, when all of the sudden the earth beneath her feet shook and she almost fell down. Good thing she took her boats not heals. She was getting wiser every day.

She desperately looked around trying to figure out if it was an actual earthquake, but it was as if the building were fine, just the ground looked cracked.

That was when she suddenly saw something large getting out of the subway. She stood still not sure if she should watch what it was, run or hide.

Before she knew it she was behind the corner near an alley looking at the creature coming out of the subway in the dark night.

It took her a moment but she realized who it was.

 _Ha. Were they meant to meet or what?_

She was about to walk closer to announce her presence when some guy screamed.

'Holy shit! What the hell is that?'

'Another one of those weird aliens. Dude, let's get it!'

She rolled her eyes before she was stunned as the two punks started to throw rocks at the turtle man as he fell to his knees. He didn't look right. He didn't try to fight back them or at least protect himself.

She looked around until she found a pipe and rushed with it hitting one of them legs.

'What the hell? You bitch!' he said ready to jump at her when she swung the pipe again. She and Jill used to go watch all sort of games in the school and city. Some guys liked to show them around. Baseball wasn't so bad when you got the hang of it.

'Can't you see she's nuts? Let's get out of here,' said his friend and patted him on the chest urging him to leave.

She probably looked batshit crazy right now. Once she was sure they were gone she dropped the pipe and rushed to the turtle lying on the ground.

'Raph,' she kneeled down, 'Raph, can you hear me?'

She looked around. It was dead of the night, but the earthquake had to wake people up. Soon they would come and see him and who knew what they would do given what just happened with those two punks.

She looked down at Raph again. She had to get him off the street.


	8. The Popular Girl 04

**The Popular Girl**

* * *

Come sleep with me. We won't make love, love will make us

* * *

It felt liked Raph was coming back from a very strange dream. In that dream, he could remember he was inside a strange room puking to a bucket while Nicole was brushing his shoulder and telling him it was fine and she did worse.

It wasn't the first time he had a dream with the sexy latino chick but it was first time she was dressed and the dream was just weird. She kept up also saying _wake up. You can't stay asleep._ The strangest part was that he could actually smell her scent near him. He was losing it for sure now. He was just getting too much into the girl.

He opened his eyes once again only to find himself inside lying on a bed in a strange unfamiliar room with Nicole lying as well by the end of the bed looking at her phone.

'Whoa,' he said before he could stop himself, but the soon he said it he felt how soar his throat felt. What the hell just happened?

'Hey, you're awake again,' she sat up and pulled out a bottle of water from a small paper bag.

'Here, you can drink now,' she told him and handed him the bottle. He took it feeling incredibly confused and thirsty. He drank it all at once finally piecing together what just happened. They were on patrol when Leo's chick called him that some dudes were putting a bomb in the subway near them.

They rushed over.

He caught a glimpse of a chick in a hoodie with her face covered with a scarf to hide it from the cameras. At least she was a smart chick.

He and Mikey went after them while Donnie and Leo tried to stop the bomb from going off. They did it, but neither of them knew about the second one. The explosion separated him from the others and he hit his head really hard against the collapsing wall.

His heart stopped. His brothers. He took his phone.

 _Safe Robert_

 _Safe Jim_

 _Safe John_

He let out a relieved breath.

His brothers were safe. He looked around the room and Nicole who was calming looking at him. Wherever he was it wasn't a creepy lab or the morgue so he should be fine.

He typed: _Safe_ _John Paul_

That was their little trick. If they didn't or couldn't come home, they had to write the word _safe_ along with a member of some band. Whichever name started the rest have to write the name of the other band members. Band could only have 4 members of course. This time Leo picked Led Zeppelin by the looks of it.

'What happened? After the explosion? What are you doing here? And where the hell is here? It smells like pee and cum.'

'Well, it should. It's the cheapest motel with zero security and cameras. It was the closes by.'

He shook his head, 'Start from the top. This makes no sense to me, princess.'

She rolled her eyes. He noticed that unlike the previous times now she was wearing some shorts stocking and a black top. He spotted her jacket on the bed a little further to the side and her shoes must have been the tall black boats on the ground. At least she wasn't wearing a mini dress, but this was still not the type of thing you could took to a church or school or everywhere except a bar or club or strip club. He noticed his weapons and some of his gear was at a nearby chair probably so he could sleep better without it.

'I saw you coming from the subway,' she started filling the blanks inside his memory, 'You were in a pretty bad shape. Concussion based on online MD.'

'So you got me into a shitty motel and took care of me? Why? How?'

She shrugged her shoulders, 'It wasn't the hard. Carrying you was a bitch, but the clerk at the desk had no objections when I told him I will used to back entrance.'

'How so?'

She raised her brows at him in a suggestive way, 'You would be surprised what I can do and get if I _really_ want it.' Okay, that was totally not cool from her as he was lying in the bed feeling a bit weirder than usual and she looked well…like herself.

'I paid him of course,' she chuckled. 'As for why? Payback? Now I only own you for one life saving.'

She pulled out a pack of cigarettes and a lighter. She put one between her lips but looked at him like she just realized something, 'Do you mind?'

He wasn't looking forward to smelling smoke here, but if she was telling the truth she fucking saved his life and secret. Besides based on the fresh smell of smoke, he knew she already took the liberty of smoking before he woke up.

'Light away. It's not like I could stop you.'

She grinned at him with the cigarette between her teeth and lightened it up. She pulled in once before she said, 'How do you feel now? Head?'

He brushed it a bit. He could feel a bit of a pressure, but it wasn't as bad as he feared at least the pain, 'I guess I am good, but I wasn't if I was knocked out for almost eight hours.' He said based on the time on his phone which was when he noticed right after his last call to Mikey there was a new contact added as _Junky Whore._

He looked at her frowning feeling ashamed that he called her that again, 'You put your number in my phone?'

'And saved yours. Now we can snapchat,' she winked at him and showed him her phone. He was apparently listened as _Hero Dick Turtleneck._

He rolled his eyes at her and went to check the contact only to find her picture popping at the screen. 'You took pictures of yourself?' he asked sounding annoyed although he had to admit the picture was pretty good with her posing from the top her revealing her cleavage.

'Oh, I took a lot of pictures some are very _good_. You should check them out,' she said smirking at him as she smoked and he had to do his best not to blush like a school kid. Damn this chick.

'Also, I admired your photos. You like to take pictures after you work out don't you?'

'Cut it out. I have to leave,' he said trying to stand up only to feel dizzy and almost falling over. Nicole was quickly on her knees putting him back to lied down, 'Stop it. You're still not well enough. You were puking for a couple of hours and barely knew what was happening until now. I suggest you lied down for a bit. The place is paid for and it's daylight outside. Not a good way for you to be seen outside.'

He nodded annoyed that she was right and she smiled a bit satisfied before brushed her hair a bit.

'So the puking and you waking me up was not a dream, ha?'

'No, I googled how to take care of concussion and went with the drill. I didn't kill you so I guess it was decent enough care. '

'Ha, maybe you found your calling Nurse Nicole,' he said smirking and she grinned at him, 'Doubt that. Rich bitches don't end up as nurse.'

He blinked at the way she said it with a soft bitterness in her voice. It was probably the concussion that he wasn't freaking out right now. He was in a motel room with a girl in daylight. This was all sorts of ways wrong. He was out at the daylight, he was inside a place people could see him, he was with a girl, he was with Nicole.

Since he returned her bracelet feeling some sort of stupid feeling inside his stomach a couple of weeks had passed, but he couldn't stop thinking about her. He knew where she lived. So if he wanted he could pay her a visit, but he didn't. He wanted to stay the hell away from her and her dark eyes and nice soft hands and lips. Just away! He couldn't just hang out with her. It was not possible. They were different species even. She was hot and human and he was a mutant turtle and ugly as hell.

Still, she…saved him. She brought him somehow into a motel which he still had no clue how and took care of him. She even made fun of the fact he called her _that_ and put her number and pictures into his phone apparently.

'Hey, uh, thanks,' he found himself saying, 'I..wouldn't be surprised if you would just leave me there after…well things.'

She watched him for a moment and smiled a bit weirdly before looking down. Sometimes she was so cool and smug and just bitchy and then at times all of this change and she was like a different person all modest and weird.

'Yeah, well, I surprised my self a bit. Wouldn't pick myself for the hero type, you know?' she finished her smoke and put it out against the wooden bed carefully. It wasn't probably the worst thing they did there.

She returned to her position lying on the bed opposite from him. They watched each other for a moment before she smiled, 'So there's four of you and a rat?'

He rolled his eyes. Damn the stupid phone. Also how long was she looking until she found it, or did it fell off him?

'I'm not talking to you about that.'

'Why?'

'It's none of your business.'

'Boo,' she said but with a smirk so it was clear she didn't mean it really. She pulled out her phone and scrolled in it a bit, 'Looks like someone ducktaped the people behind the attack to a wall. Know anything about it?'

'Probably my brothers,' he frowned, 'Damn it, I wish I could beat them myself.'

She smirked and suddenly brought her legs to his side pressing them against the wall next to him. He reminded himself not to look weird although he couldn't help how he felt. She was lying there next to him with her gorgeous legs and those stockings doing once again funny things to his stomach and well turning him on. If he would move a bit he would touch her. If he would touch her who knows what would have happened?

'What about you?' he found himself asking suddenly.

'Got any siblings?'

She looked at him her face upside down to his, 'No. Just me. Spoiled princess. My dad has this kid somewhere in D.C, but I never saw him. He just pays the bills for him.'

'Whoa, father of the year material.'

'I guess,' she said and spread her arms to stretch a bit, 'He's cool most of the time. He doesn't get in my way. Let's me do what I want. No groundbreaking rules.'

'That isn't always a good thing,' he said welcoming the distraction in form of a conversation from the way her body looked nice on the bed.

'Right, cause kids love when their parents always command them what to do, right?' she grinned at him knowing she was right a bit.

He groaned annoyed and she chuckled letting her foot touch his arm a bit and he pushed it away, but felt a bit playful too. It was oddly nice even if they were lying in a bed talking about BS in the crackwhore motel.

He didn't know things like that. He talked to his brothers, his father, April. This felt so much different.

'So tell me, mister grumpy hero. Why are you a hero anyway?' she asked next, 'I can't imagine it to be fun saving junkies who aren't smart enough to keep their mouth zipped.'

He smirked, 'Yeah, well, luckily for you I got good temper.'

This time she laughed full on, and he felt something odd inside his stomach. There was want. I mean, look at her, she was a drop dead gorgeous, but when she laughed like that her eyes sparkling a little bit it wasn't sexual, it was just...she had a cute laugh.

She threw her hair a bit to the side. It was messy now from lying on the bed, but still she looked perfect. How was it possible that girls could look so amazing under any circumstances?

They talked for what in Raph's mind felt like hours about pointless shit. What kind of music do you listen to? Do you actually like smoking? If you could travel back in time where would you go? Michael Jordan's first life game obviously. Weird...talking with a junky princess from Upper East Side was actually pretty awesome. She was witty, sarcastic and boldly funny. She also teased him a bit and flirted.

From time to time while they talked she let her leg or foot touched him. He didn't understand how could she be so casual about him. She was a NY princess from what he could tell, she was used to pretty and fancy things, so how could she be so casual about being here with him? They, he were hideous. They were mutants and turtles, and yet she didn't treat him like one.

After a couple of things were said they just lied down, 'Hey, if you're hungry I got food. It's probably cold but Big Mac is never too cold to pass.'

She said and pulled out a paper bag, 'I didn't want to leave for too long so I only went to the nearest joint around here between the times I had to wake you up for a bit.'

He took the bag trying not to look to obvious about checking her stomach when she stretched for the bag. She handed it to him while she pulled out some frays.

He smirked unpacking the cold hamburger. She frowned a bit, 'What?'

'Nothing. I just thought girls with figure like yours didn't do junk food.'

She rolled her eyes, 'Please, I like my body just fine now anyway. Besides not eating fries? I rather be fat.'

'You're weird.'

'Says the guy who liked Cure for Wellness.'

'All I am saying the movie had an edge.'

'Well, at least you didn't say you liked The Mother! Fries?' she asked offering.

'Upper East Side princesses know how to share?'

'Well, sharing is caring, and I'm junky princess not a typical princess.'

'Right,' he smirked, 'How much were the shoes?'

'Don't talk about shoes. Dude, I bet you spent even more on sports equipment, comic books, porn and shit.'

'Jeez, so offensive.'

'Shoes are sacred, Raphael.'

He blamed the shiver that ran through at the way she said his full name on the chilliness of the room not horniness. Well, he tried to blame it on that.

He finished the burger in minimum time.

'Hey, uh, before…when I came to return your bracelet, you said something at the end, remember?'

'That I tent to do things people say I can't? Like when I said we will meet again and look at us now eating and lying in bed like this,' she winked at him and he rolled his eyes.

'No, I meant the thing before about never being good enough…who was that about?' he asked and knew the he changed the conversation to a much serious one.

Nicole's face changed for a bit before she smirked in that bitter way she sometimes did. After she befriended Lorrie she started to mimic her edgy smirk. She thought it was very cool and wanted to be like her too, 'Yeah, well, I have this friend…I guess that day I went to her cheer practice and I just saw how people were staring at her like she was the next best thing since colorful TV.'

She brushed her hair a bit a thing he noticed she did when she was nervous, 'Anyway, I don't know why I felt like…okay, that's BS.' She was a bitch but she could at least be honest to herself, 'I know why I felt like that. One guy came to Jay when she was talking with me said that he wants to go out with her. Jay blew him off with five seconds record telling him she had a boyfriend and knew he was seeing one of our classmates. This asshole he just,' she looked away, 'He didn't get it and said it could be their little secret. Just like that. Like whatever. Jay gave him the coldest stare and told him to fuck off before she would beat his ass.'

When she looked up at him she knew Raph understood that there was more to the story, 'You know how I said I do reckless shit that I regret? Well, a couple of days before I almost had sex with a guy who has a girlfriend. I know they are dating and I still went to his car and wanted to fuck him.'

She threw herself on the bed. He knows she's an addict, might as well know the rest of how fucked up she was in full extension.

'So you went to have…sex with the jerk and what got guilty about it?' he asked, she could sense he was upset now. Maybe it wasn't a good thing to talk about shit like that with him.

She sat up, 'It was bullshit from the start. I was feeling sorry about myself after our second meeting,' she pointed between the two of them and his face softened as he realized it was him who made her so upset she went to find comfort elsewhere. _Nice one, Raph._

'And I have been flirting with him in a joking manner for months now so I guess I wasn't thinking. We went to his car to have some joint and then he kissed me and we started to make up…but it was so weird. I wasn't feeling it, so I pushed him away and left. My point is Jay would have never done that. She's just Jay. If she got upset she would handle it and even if she wasn't seeing someone she wouldn't go after a taken guy. She's…gosh, I love her, but sometimes I hate her and I hate myself that I hate her for all the wrong reasons. I don't hate her for what she does or is but for what I will never be.'

He scratched the back of his head. Suddenly their talks went from calming and joking to damn serious life crisis, 'Why do you think. This chick is better than you? Because she doesn't make the same mistakes as you? I pretty sure she makes her own mistakes and no one is perfect, Nicole.'

The raven haired girl nodded, 'I know she isn't perfect, but it's what she does. I…picture this. I'm at a party. People are around me and I am telling them some hilarious story about I don't know whatever. People are listening and laughing and thinking I'm really funny. Then Jay walks to the room. She doesn't do anything. She doesn't say anything. Her hair looks always the same and she doesn't wear makeup. Her clothes are completely ordinary while I was working on my hair and make up for an hour and half and spent almost two hundred on my clothes and shoes and yet everyone stops laughing or talking and just looks at her as she calmly sits down and smiles at me. This actually happened. It's just something inside of Jay that makes people crave her without her even doing anything. I try and try and try and yet if it came down to Jay and I people always pick her. She's just beautiful and skinny and she doesn't even have to do anything for it while I just try and…I just hate that and I hate it even more than she doesn't even want to popular or noticed. She just… Jay,' Nicole said hoping Raph would get it and not call her insane or neurotic. Yeah, she got it she was a bit insane about it, but she always felt like she would live in Jay's shadow if they spent too much time together.

'This is totally fucked up, princess,' he said and crossed his arms, 'I can't imagine someone passing spending time with you for some chick who doesn't even make smartass comments.'

Nicole chuckled a bit before she took her phone, 'Oh, trust me. She's really all that.'

She found a photo from her last party with Jay and her where they had their faces close up next to each other both smiling into the camera.

She turned the phone and moved closer to him, 'Now look at her and tell me she isn't the prettiest girl you ever saw.'

Raph took her phone and looked at it trying to ignore how close Nicole was just to him. He forced his eyes to stay on the picture in the phone. Nicole and a very pretty blonde were both smiling at him wearing fancy dresses. He could tell that the blonde had no makeup while Nicole's face was full of it and her hair looked like she worked on it for an hour like she said. But the bottom line was that if he had a choice between the blonde who looked like a pure flower and a spitfire like Nicole, he would always pick the raven haired girl.

'You're looking at this all wrong, princess. It's not about who's prettier. Come here. Let me show you how I see this, okay?' he said and she looked suspicious at him before she moved to his side their shoulders touching now and her hair tickling his side. She smelled just as good as the last time he was this close to her when she kissed him in a shitty alley after almost being robbed and harassed.

'Okay, so, what I see are too fucking good looking chicks. Both gorgeous, both different. You can't compare two people because no person is the same. My bros and I are the same and yet we are totally different if you look closely. By the picture and your words I can tell the girl has some light magnet inside her which brings people toward her, but you got something dark going on in you which brings people toward _you_ as well. It's easy to like something light everyone likes the Christmas lights, but that doesn't mean people don't like dark things too. The right kind of people anyway. I think you're both good looking and hot,' he admitted the last part feeling warm all of the sudden.

Nicole was quiet for a while before she asked, 'Okay, mister, based on what you see now. Me or her?' she tried to keep her tone light and easygoing but he could easily pick up on her insecurities.

'Girl, I would pick you any day. Who would want a quiet girl when you can have a chick who loves NY Knicks anytime.'

She was quiet for a while before she sat up and turned to face him on her face was the cutest and softest smile yet. He only caught a glimpse of it when he was returning the bracelet, but now it was in full force and he knew he said the right things when he got a reward like that.

If he was a lovable idiot, Raph would tell her that she should smile like that more, and that he found her seriously prettier than the blonde. Although he didn't say it like that he was feeling his heart tremble against his ribcage as he knew the atmosphere in the room changed again.

Nicole kneeled on the bed and moved closer to him, 'So am I prettier?' she asked coyly knowing he would lie if he said she was, but he caught her off guard when he said, 'To me? Yeah.'

She watched him for a second knowing she never met a guy/turtle whatever like him before. She put her hands on his cheeks and kissed him stealing his breath away again. She was so wild in this.

He had trouble to keep up, but despite his lack of experience, it was only his second kiss after all, he did his best to mimic her movements and kiss her back. It was so bizarre. It felt so good and hot and completely out of this world. Of course, he thought about kisses and girl and sex, but he wasn't an idiot, he knew how he looked and that he couldn't just find himself someone. He couldn't tell anyone their secret and yet now he was kissing the hottest and coolest chick he ever met inside an hour motel where the sheets had probably more action than the ones in a Hef's Mansion.

She ended up between his legs pressing herself against his body. He immediately got hard and she could tell as she felt it against her stomach. She would totally ruin him, he knew it from the first time he helped her up in the alley and she didn't even flinch at his disgusting hand touching her nice chocolate skin.

She broke the kiss both of them gasping. She kept her hands on his face licking her lips, 'Is this fine?'

'Fine?' he asked feeling dumb. She literally kissed him stupid. Good, she liked that. She liked being the one in control. She liked being in charge with him…for now at least. When he got more confident she would let him take over, but for now it was fine.

She giggled and rolled her eyes, 'I'm asking if you're okay with this?'

'Why wouldn't I be?' he asked still not following, 'You can feel exactly how okay, I am with this.'

'Yeah, but in comparison I have far more experience than you. I need to know you're up for it, virgin boy.'

 _Oh!_

Oh, so she was just saying that they were going to…right here? Right now? Well, that was something he wasn't expecting at all when they went out for patrol yesterday. Definitely not. Nope. How does one even expect…okay? What the hell? Why was he debating on this right now, when there was a gorgeous chick in his arms.

 _Idiot_.

'We don't have to,' she said as she saw something as hesitation move behind his eyes.

'I'm not sure if it will be okay. I never…I'm not sure what to do…how to do it,' he said feeling upset about himself that he literally did not know how to have sex even when his dick was hard as a rock up and ready. It was embarrassing to admit, and he couldn't believe he did actually. He would blame it on the concussion later.

She was the hottest thing he ever fucking saw in real life and she was kissing him and looked like she was into it too.

She moved her hands against his abs looking very pleased with them, 'It's fine. All sex is positive as long as it is safe and consensual. You just relax and do what feels right. I will tell you if something's off and you will tell, okay?'

He nodded not daring to say anything more since he was literally shaking from need right now. She licked her lips and kissed him again. This time she went slower. She put some thought into what it meant that she didn't have a problem kissing him while she got weird making out with Matt the other night or the boy whose name was lost to her afterwards. She didn't found an answer and right now it was pointless to even start the thought as let her tongue slide against Raph's and her hands wonder lower and lower through his abs. She liked them. She always loved good abs and this turtle definitely had some fine pieces.

After a while she felt him put his hands on her back and waist. It was slow, like he was testing the water, but she didn't mind really. She liked how different his hands felt to hands of other guys she had been with before.

One of his hands very non-threatening slide under her top and touched her naked skin. She moaned a bit. It was nice.

She broke the kiss again and pressed their faces together for a moment as she let her hands go even lower to his stomach and then to his dick. It was really hard and big based on what she could tell from the touch.

His breath got sucked in the moment her soft hands touch it. It was the first time ever someone else had their hands on his junk, and _whoa_ it felt good.

Nicole smirked a bit, 'I guess this is okay, then.'

'Like you didn't know?' he said back kissing her as he let his hand move higher to her bra and under the strap. She could feel him flinch a bit when she started to softly move against him with her palm. It was hard to concentrate on anything when she did that.

Nicole lost her virginity when she was fourteen years old. She wasn't sure she wanted to actually do it, but she wanted to be friends with Lorrie and not be lame virgin girl anymore. The guy was cute, but old and until this day he didn't know he fucked a fourteen year old virgin named Nicole. She told him her name was Sarah, and when he came he actually called out the fake name. It was okay, some things she liked some things not. She didn't come, but when he hugged her afterwards it was nice. She waited until he was asleep and left texting Lorrie to come pick her up. They shared details and laughed out some stupid things which happened. Nicole tried to see it as a positive thing. Now she wasn't a virgin and the guy was okay for her first time. Since then she had sex a lot. She party hard, smoked, drank and sometimes took some pills or joint. She slept with guys in clubs, classmates, one time her dad's employee. Some was good sex, some not so much, but in the end it was always her choice. Even the night she didn't remember from her party where she woke up without panties she was sure she had to want it. She always did so she had to then as well.

When she saw Raph it was…impossible to describe. It was like she was looking at a fucking miracle and all she could do was stare. She was adrenaline high from almost being shot and he was just so…big and completely filling the room. She didn't think about fucking him then. Of course not. He was a giant turtle for fucks' sake, but then later when he called her _that_ and came up close to her. Those dark eyes, abs, that energy which was coming from him. His anger was on the same level as her recklessness and somehow it made it so much hotter. She just grabbed him and kissed him like there was no tomorrow to show him who she was and that he wouldn't forget about her ever. When he trembled in her arms trying to catch his breath afterwards she felt pure power. She felt like never before with any guy even if she was on top or holding them by the balls. This was different. Ralph made her feel…different.

Now when he looked at Jay and said he would still pick her he made her feel the same way as when he returned her bracelet. She knew he was horny for her. He wanted to fuck. It was fine, but he was also kind of sweet. They walked for three hours, and yet she couldn't help thinking about how it would feel to be with someone like him. Did he have a dick? Could he use it? Would it fit? She really wanted to know, she wanted to try it and feel it. Feel him like that.

She looked down at his dick which she was slowly and teasingly working on now. It didn't look much different from any other guy's except it was larger and green. It made sense though, he was a giant green turtle. She knew he was a virgin. That much was obvious from his kisses. They were soft and chaotic and definitely not kisses of someone who made out with other girls a lot. Yet she liked it. She had players, assholes and such. Never someone like him though. Never someone who could have her as their first.

She liked that thought. Even if they would do something just for today. Every girl after her would be compared to her not the other way around.

She leaned down and licked his tip startling him and making his dick jerk on its own.

'Jesus,' groaned Raph trying very much to calm down. This girl was going to ruin him. This chick was going to kill him. She just…she was…out of this world or something. Here she was holding his dick even licking it and _fuck it_ felt so good and she didn't looked bothered by the fact that he wasn't a man, but a giant turtle.

She leaned down again and her mouth went around him. He pressed his head against the wall behind the bed because _holy shit_ that felt euphoric. He closed his eyes moaning and groaning as Nicole started to palm him while licking and sucking his tip. He was getting close fast. He was never touched by anyone else before and now this Latino Goddess was giving him a handy and a JB this was too much for his system. He kept on stroking her back slowly moving to her hair trying hard not to grip it while she was pushing him closer and closer to the edge. He never would have thought he would have this. He never thought there would be a…a girl and ….and he would…and ….

With each suck it became harder and harder for him to think until he got close and grabbed her shoulder pushing her away from him as he came firing on himself and the bed.

She literally sucked his brains out through his dick for a couple of moment as his eyes rolled back and he was trying to find some reason again after such orgasm.

Nicole thought it was fortunate the sheets couldn't get any dirtier. They were pretty much sticky now. Well, more than before.

She pulled out some wet tissues which were on the nightstand probably since the motel was used for such activities often. She cleaned her lips realizing his sperm tasted different than others. Sure, she had been with a lot of different guys and no sperm was the same but this one felt even more different. Not bad or good just different. She handed him a few as he started to clean himself up, still hard. It would take more than that before he would finally go soft.

She brushed her hair a bit, 'How was it?'

'I think at one point I saw God,' he said and she laughed, 'Yeah, I was told I'm good at this.'

He shook his head not wanting to think about other guys Nicole had been with now, 'Not good, the fucking best.'

She grinned for a moment before he took her shoulder and pulled her closer to kiss. It was a very erotic kiss. His hand return under her shirt, and he tucked it wanted to get it off, 'I love your short tops but I want it off.'

'I feel the same way about them,' she said and helped him pull it off before she threw it on the ground.

He breathed hard again at the sight of her in her cherry red bra. It was a new one she didn't had on yet. It looked pretty simple except for how amazing the back with the laces was. She teasingly raised her hand and put it behind her back over her shoulder posing a bit for him, 'What'cha think? It's new.'

'It's…great and red,' he said the fact that it was red totally doing something to him.

'Now you,' she said and nodded at his head. She might have put away his weapons, but she let him have his mask. It felt a bit like she was being inappropriate and well she decided to let him keep it.

Oddly it felt like it really meant something to pull down his mask. It was ridiculous because it wasn't like now she would realize he was a turtle and not a regular Jerry the plumber guy. She was shirtless and looked less bother by it then how he felt about removing his mask. He slowly raised his hand and untied the bandana before he set it carefully on the nightstand. She looked closer at him, 'Well, aren't you handsome?'

He rolled his eyes at her, but he couldn't be upset. A smirk was playing on his face. How could he be upset after a blow job and with a hot chick in bed with him? Well, not bed right now. She went to the bed. Maybe some other time she will let him unhook the bra, but right now she didn't feel like impatiently waiting. She put her bra down on top of the top and once again stole his breath away.

 _Holy shit, she's going to kill me._

She was the most gorgeous girl he ever saw, for sure. She was a real life goddess.

'Want to touch them?' she asked as he got a bit hypnotized by them for a few moments and she started to feel cold.

'Yeah…sure…' Idiot, couldn't you think up something smarter to say? No, do you see them? They're fucking wonderful!

Nicole kissed him again moving once again closer to him. She was intoxicating as far as Raph could tell. She stroke his head a bit slowly, teasingly constantly keeping her eyes on his making it impossible for him to know what she was thinking, but she was not disgusted. Not once with all her flaws and attitudes did the Upper East Side princess acted like she was disgusted by him, by his looks, his body, his way of speaking to her, insults. She touched him, kissed him, spoke with him sucked his fucking dick like he was an ordinary human being just like her. Like he wasn't a turtle or a mutant. Like there was no difference between them.

He licked his lips, 'You're something else, you know that Nicole.'

She didn't fail to notice this was the first time he used her name today. She loved it when he used it. She got up a bit not moving away, just lifting herself on her knees to be higher. She carefully reached down for the belt on her shorts. She moved slowly undoing it in front of his eyes. She pulled it out, and he had to admit watching Nicole undress was the hottest thing he had ever seen.

She raised her hand to the side with the belt before she let it fall down somewhere on the bed. She then let her tiny fingers get to the little button holding the shorts. She undid it quickly and pulled down the zipper still looking at him before leaned backwards and let herself fall on her back on the bed. Raph could only swallow and watch as the latina pulled down her shorts and panties with one go raising her hips and then legs to make them slide down before she pushed them to the edge of the bed and then down. When she got back up, she moved like a snake or something because she completely hypnotized him with her moves. He was a sure in that moment that he was goner.

She took something from the behind him on the night stand and opened it. It was a condom.

He honestly though in that moment he might have died during the explosion and this was heaven. She easily got the condom on. She was definitely skillful. His member reacted at her touch instantly. It was weird having a rubber on his junk. Sure, the sewers flew in many open but he never actually had a new one on his member. It felt weird a bit, but it was nothing to lose interest as Nicole was sitting in front of him naked.

He swallowed some more as she looked up at him, the look in her eyes predatory. She leaned closer and kissed him, 'All ok?'

He nodded several times feeling his whole body shaking once again, 'Yeah, totally, yes.'

She didn't chuckle or laugh, she just smiled a bit caressing his face softly for a couple of moments before she moved closer. By this time he was still pressed against the wall because he honestly didn't know what to do. What could he do? She was so tiny despite her spirit. He could hurt her. He didn't want that, plus the fear and arousal were making him almost paralyzed.

She moved on her knees again this time sitting on top of his legs and taking his member into her hands again.

His hand went to her waists, she was so soft. She carefully got it inside of her trying not to flinch or show him it was definitely bigger than others she had before. She was a good actress so she just kept a straight face as she let it little by little in feeling Raph's grip tightening on her body as he was trying to gain control and not start jerking. He lost it once and moved causing her to freeze.

'S-sorry,' he growled out.

Nicole took a deep breath and pushed him as far as she could before she leaned closer to him and kissed him softly, 'I'll start, okay? I will tell you when it's okay to move.'

He nodded not wanting to hurt her. God forbid he would do that when she was so… _amazing_.

She waited for a moment trying to adjust to the feeling of having something so large inside her. Before she kissed him again and started to rock her hips slowly at first getting herself into the mood. She let her other hand touch his abs knowing that always did it for her. She loved good abs and big guys.

Raph didn't move even if everything in him, every primal instinct told him to flip her or something and just…

She moved slowly, but _fuck_ he loved it. She was slowly with every move killing him and he was loving it. He would let her kill him after this if she wanted to because it felt so good. She was just so good. She was tight and warm and just fucking everything even with the rubber on top of him.

He let his hands move to her back slowly caressing her there running them up and down finding a sort of rhythm to her movements.

At one point she bit her lip knowing it was okay to move and leaned closer to his ear, 'Fuck me, Raphael.'

He let his fingers rig into her back and kissed her bare shoulder to calm down a bit as he slowly started to rock his hips to the rhythm she set for them. Slow and sexual. They moved slowly but it felt so good even better than when it was just her moving.

They were both still sitting hands on each other her sitting in his lap. She continued to search his body touching everything she could to find out how it felt in her hands. Just how different was he while he tried not to come instantly and blew it. He didn't last too long though just as she Nicole started to lean away and catch the sensation he was close to coming into the condom hard, but Nicole just continued to move as he was still hard. It was good he was pressed against the wall.

His hips wouldn't stop moving and he kept on moving and then started to speed up when he was close growing uncoordinated in his movements, but Nicole didn't stop.

'It's fine,' she moaned out.

He tried to say something to warn her, but she just leaned away clearly knowing already and trying to work herself to get to her height as well.

He let his hand touch her breast causing her to moan louder this time. She was so gorgeous. So free just so open. She let him see into her. She let him watch her as she slowly came on top of him getting him to come as well no matter how hard he tried to hold on again.

He tried to focus, but it was impossible with their bodies moving. It felt so fucking good. So he stroked her nipple hoping it was doing at least something for her.

'Harder,' she breathed out again, and he bit the inside of his cheek to move harder into her while also gripping her breast a bit more violent. She didn't seemed mind as she started to breath harder. She was so wet. He could smell the arousal coming from her. It filled his nostrils and made him go wild. Primal just like he was afraid, he would.

He started to trust into her harder, rougher. She moved closer to her and put her arms around his neck burying her face into his shoulder.

'Please,' she said and he fucking lost it speeding up knowing he would lose it soon.

She was letting out those moans and smelling so good her breasts moving against his chest and her pussy… _holy fucking shit._

He heard her yelp a bit which was when he came hard into the condom inside her. He came harder than he ever did even when watching hardcore porn. He just came completely undo. He was sure he even blacked out for a moment because when he finally came from his orgasm Nicole was still in his arms trying to catch his break, but she already managed to push his now partly soft dick out of her.

She swallowed a bit moving away. She was sweaty now, but so was he and he was sure now she would smell like him to everyone who would get too close.

She chuckled looking satisfied before she took the condom and threw it on the ground away from their clothes and things.

She then took another and raised her brows, 'This okay?'

'You have to ask?'

She put it one without a minute to spare, 'Lie down.'

'What?' he asked his brain to fully working yet.

'Lie down, I want to ride you,' she said causal and already move for him to lie down.

He did as she asked. He couldn't believe she wanted to go at it again. She got on top of him and chuckled, 'Don't look like a blushing bride.'

She stroked him in her hand a couple of times before he got harder again. He put his hand on her waists again as she got on top of him and pushed him inside her this time instantly without a single flinch. She was stretched nicely for him now, but still wonderfully tight.

She smirked at him as she started to move again and Raph was sure he died and was in heaven where Nicole was his personal goddess. She moved against him getting herself off. She was restless. She just did what she wanted to and what felt good. He should have known that about her, but this was a new level.

After her two or three times, Nicole figured out what she liked and what not in sex. Still she got disappointed at times, but she always knew what made her feel good. She craved to feel good.

She loved the feeling or Raph inside her. He was so hug and thick and made her feel so full she doubted she ever felt full like that before. She wanted to show him how she liked it and take what she liked it, and he seemed more than happy to give it to her. She wanted to be in control. She loved for him to let her be the one in control. She moved on top of him not bothering to hold back or play coy or shy. She just did what made her feel good. She let her hand into her hair pulling it a bit as she moaned letting his dick slide in and out from her. Her eyes were closed as she only focused on the feeling of pure bliss which was slowly pushing her to her high.

Raph watched her from under her. She was…a goddess. She was rocking her hips against him, on top of him like some goddess of temptation and sex or whatnot. She was moving so freely he could only watch. He didn't even care if she would get him off, just watching her was like having a organism. He was still feeling himself getting there as well as she was literally pushing it out of him with the way she let her walls move around him.

There was no way, he could have expected _this_ to happen when he went for patrol today.

She took his hand at one point and pressed it against her breast again biting her lips, then soon once again everything went white as his brain exploded with another orgasm nearly knocking him out from how intense it felt.

She almost fell down from him to her side breathing hard while looking at him before she started to chuckle and then full on laugh.

'Wha…?' he asked still breathless and the girl rolled to the side to take her cigarettes and started to smoke again.

'Nothing. That was just fun,' she said as she blew out some smoke careless to the fact that she was naked just lying there with him. Then again she was Nicole so it shouldn't come to a surprise.

He closed his eyes drifting a bit. She worn him out. She _worn_ him out. She fucked him or let him fuck her or just…they fucked.

His mind was all over the place and yet not thinking about anything particular at all.

When he opened his eyes Nicole was by his side still smoking.

'Doesn't it taste disgusting?' he asked as he had no idea what to talk about now. It wasn't like they were dating or together, right? Nicole was a girl who liked to feel good and just took it if she wanted it.

What do people who just had sex but couldn't leave the room yet talk about.

Nicole raised her brows at him letting him know she knew he was being weird but didn't comment on it.

Instead she got up and offered him the cigarette, 'It feels really good right after sex.'

Again saying it so casually like it didn't mean anything. No, that wasn't right. It wasn't like it didn't mean anything, it was more like Nicole was just used to it more than he was. For him it might have all feel weird now, how to act what to do, but Nicole just didn't over think it too much.

He took the smoke, 'If I die of lunch cancer, I blame you.'

'Feel free to haunt me afterwards,' she joked and watched him as he struggled not to choke on the smoke.

'Disgusting,' he said barely holding back another series of coughs. The raven haired girl just leaned closer to him and kissed him putting her arms around him. It was…softer compare to what they just did.

For a moment he forgot about the fact that he had a naked chick in his arms, chick he just had sex with. It was just about the two of them being together like this and it made him feel…special. Like actually something special.

He let his hand rest on the back of her neck as they kissed for a moment calmly which felt nothing like that but very much right in that moment.

When she broke the kiss she gave him this little smile and look which made him know for sure that he was over thinking things.

'Don't get corny, okay?' she said and raised her brows at him in a way which made him chuckle, 'Yeah? Well you don't get sappy.'

He brushed her hair a bit as before she went to lie down next to him keeping her head on his chest.

For a while they just lied there like that not really thinking about anything. It was just…peaceful and calm to lie naked with her like this.

Strange.

'Nicole?' asked Raph after a while of silence.

'Hm?' she let out while looking at a few pieces of her hair.

'How come you had so many condoms on you?'

She chuckled and leaned up to look at him, 'I went to buy burgers, didn't I?'

He watched her not catching on for a moment before he understood and caught her hips. He rolled them earning a laugh from her until she was under him and he was looking down at her. She continued to smirk for a moment before she hooked one of her legs around him.

'So are we talking or what? I can tell you're ready again.'

He grinned, 'You're a sex addict you know that?'

'So is that a no?' she asked grinning back right before he kissed her again deeper, hungrier, like now it was even more intense since he knew what could happen after a kiss.

And it did happen again.

* * *

She would definitely want to go again later but right she was fine just lying next to him looking over her phone. It was…amazing. It was more than amazing it was…okay, she was never good with words, but it was fucking good. It felt good. It felt _really_ good.

She liked feeling good. He made her feel good plus he wasn't totally annoying to talk to so that helped. He was very quiet now just lying next to her breathing. Right after their second them it felt weird a bit like he wanted to talk but wasn't sure if he should.

She didn't want to talk. There was no point. She kissed him hoping he could tell she was into him enough not to want to talk. She hated talking. Talking always led to awkwardness and feelings and heartache.

Personal opinion.

She knew she was his first. It felt powerful to be someone's very first, but at the same time it felt like she had a responsibility to make him feel good about it and know it was good, but didn't have to mean more. It was just…she liked to spent time with him, sex was good, so why not have some fun about it?

Her finger swiped from the endless posts and photos of her friends and classmates without even paying too much attention to it.

She felt him start so stroke her side and smirk wondering if they could go again, when all of the sudden she froze and went really pale in the face, 'Oh, God.'

He blinked down at her, 'What?'

She opened her mouth a couple of times as the realization that she was staring at someone she knew very well since she was a kid was hurt badly.

'T-this picture…the girl they are taking into the ambulance I-I know her,' said Nicole swallowing hard several times her eyes still on the phone.

Raph frowned seeing how visibly shaken the girl got by it. He moved closer to her and put his hand on her back supportively. Oddly it made her breath a little bit before she looked up at him not sure if to cry or scream or what to do now.

'I know her…'


	9. The Peculiar Girl 01

**The Peculiar Girl**

* * *

 _ **There are no strangers in here, just friends you haven't met. Roald Dahl**_

* * *

'Oh, oh, what about this one?' asked enthusiastically Mikey loving the annoyed look Raph shot him as he was about to tell them another _dad_ joke. Lately it was all he had been talking about apart from his new found love in Fortnite.

'Why did a coffee mug file a police report?'

'It got mugged?' asked Donnie almost exhausted looking like he once again haven't had proper 8 hours of sleep.

Mikey shot him a whiny look, 'You're no fun. Did you hear it before?'

'Since most of your jokes were based on the same principle of word play it was a safe bet,' said his older brother.

He and his brothers were currently standing in the middle of the old factory warehouse which was closed for almost two years. It was their usual randezvous spot before and after a patrol when they were apart.

They were on patrol again. They still had a couple of good weeks before they wouldn't be able to be out anymore. Patrolling in cold winter snow was not fun. Personally Mikey liked winter. Snow was awesome, but since it was cold as in a fridge, he prefer they wouldn't be cold.

Mikey continued telling another joke wondering how much more could his brother, Raph, take before he would just explode. It was always fun to push Raph's buttons to the point when he was like a mad dog. It was not fun to get hit, but watching him trying his best to control himself was.

'Hey, fearless, you listenin'?' asked Raph once again rolling his eyes at the stupid dad joke and walking a bit closer to their oldest brother.

Leo was motionless waiting at the side of the building.

It was a couple of days now that Leo had been incredibly silent during their patrols. Sure Leo was never your chatty Suzie, but lately it was as if something was on his mind.

Maybe Mikey should investigate that. Detective Mikey to the case!

'It is hard not to when you are practically yelling,' Leo replied drily before he looked away from the edge of the roof they were currently standing on and walked toward the others.

Raph rolled his eyes at him before he went to the opposite corner of the roof.

Mikey looked to the side and noticed some empty can there. Probably the one he left last time he went up here to drink with Raph while waiting for the others.

He started to lightly kick into it with his foot, not to loud, but enough to pass some time, while Raph and Leo had their whole tension match going on.

The nearby noise caught all of their attention, and they looked at Leo, their leader.

He nodded at his brothers, 'Get ready.'

'Oh, I was a born ready,' said Raph and already jumped down while Mikey started to sing _Born Ready_ as he quickly followed him before Leo and Donnie joined.

It wasn't too hard of a fight some pugs pulled a girl into the alley and tried to mug her.

While Leo lifted the guy close to the girl they processed to kick ass. It was over in a couple of moments since the assholes were most likely just some neighborhood kids.

Mikey looked at the girl as she was still without a word standing pressed against the wall the guy pushed her at…just staring at them.

He noticed her backpack on the ground and since he was the closes there without thinking it through he grabbed it and handed it to her. Maybe it was just the rush of from the jump and a bit of a fight, or because the girl looked so much in shock that he did it. It was definitely a dumb thing to do now when he thought about it, and when Raph bitched about it later.

'Here you go, babe,' said cheerfully while the girl just watched him probably wondering if he was real or not. It was too late that he realize that she could have screamed from fear like many people did when they saw them or fainted like April did, but instead the girl just watched him.

She was quite pretty in Mikey opinion. Dark chocolate skin and big brown eyes. Her hair hidden behind a beanie. Was it brown?

He noticed the sticker on her jacket from Avengers and wanted to tell her something about it when she suddenly pressed her fingers against her chin and then pulled them away.

 _Okay?_

He blinked at me confused before Raph's voice echoed in the alley, 'Dude, come on.'

He turned around and winked at her before he ran to his brother and up on the roof again thinking that that was the first time a person didn't freak out on the outside when they saw them.

Cool.

* * *

'Some people are just nuts. Who doesn't scream when they are being robbed?' asked Raph annoyed as they were coming home after a couple of hours of patrolling around the city.

Mikey was thinking the same. Because now that he had some time to think about it the whole encounter was seriously weird.

'It was weird. She didn't even scream when she saw me.'

Raph hit Mikey over the head, 'Which was another stupid thing. You can't just go show yourself like that. Hidden in the shadows, remember? You are lucky she didn't scream and draw attention to you. We would have been toast.'

Mikey brushed the back of his head where Raph hit him and their conversation continued.

'Yeah, well, I'm sorry. I saw the back and she didn't even try to go for it so I just took it. Still a weird chick.'

His mind showed him an image of the girl touching her chin again.

'She touched her chin,' said the youngest one, 'that's it.'

Donnie who was silent for the most part with his head no doubt in his inventions again looked over at Mikey, 'Was it something like this?'

He mimicked a gesture of touching his chin with his palm as if he was sending someone a kiss.

'Yes!' cried Mikey excited, 'Does it mean anything?'

'It's _thank you_ in ASL,' replied his brother.

Mikey was quiet for a moment before he asked, 'ASL?'

'American sign language, Mikey,' Leo patiently explained calmly seemingly in a better mood now. Maybe he needed to let out some steam as well.

'So that is why she wasn't screaming?' asked Mikey since it suddenly made far more sense.

'Most likely. People who are deaf often do not speak either.'

'Well, that is freaky,' said Raph, 'Can you imagine not being able to talk or scream when you're in danger?'

'Or when you need to tell another dad joke?' asked Mikey and they all groaned.

They went to the kitchen and talked some more about the girl and things like being deaf or blind for a while. It felt like it was a while since they all just sat down and talked.

Eventually they all started to yawn and decided to go to sleep.

Mikey raced with Raph to their rooms.

His room was his most favourite place in their sewer home. They used to live in a different part of it where they all had one single room. It was okay when they were kids, but then it became seriously hard to be with each other 24/7.

Then all the things with Shredder and The Foot happened and they found this part of the sewer where they got to have their own rooms. Take the heavens for that as Raph could snore like an animal sometimes. Well a different animal, not a turtle of course. Mikey didn't think turtles snore.

His room was a reflection of him just as his brothers rooms were a reflection of them. He had a terrible mess there. Junk, old food, games, comic. Simply everything all over the place. He had a giant TV and console (which Donnie generously found and fix for him) opposite to his bed with tones of games everywhere.

His desk had a computer one with a bowl some dirty dish on the top of it. He really should do something about that.

He sat in front of his TV and linked it to his compute. He would do it tomorrow.

He quickly logged on to his accounts and came to play Fortnite.

Recently he started to play with a group of people. It was new and exciting since ever since a very bad incident with another player he didn't want to play in team with anyone.

Still he started a couple of weeks ago and good hooked again.

TITANIUMMAN69:WHERE'S EVERYBODY? He found a question from one of his teammates and smirked.

 _ **1BigHero1:No worries, you're leader is here.**_

Bullet-Proof Joe:You wish.

 _FuryMachine344:_ _I thought leaders were supposed to be at the lead not at the end?_

 _ **1BigHero1:I'm glad everyone had their funny cereal today. Now let's kick some ass!**_

They played for almost three hours until one had to log out because his mom was coming upstairs. They all log out and Mikey went to bed face palming on the unmade bed.

He really should clean his room.

Still, as he rolled on his back he opened his eyes and reached for his phone quickly searching up ASL.

He read wiki for a while and then watched a video for beginners not even sure why before he knocked himself out for good his mind drifting to the sign _thank you_ once again for some reason.

In the morning Master Splinter came in with a face mask kicked him out of the bed and processed to systematically clean his room while complaining about what a pig he was.

'Oh man~'

* * *

Molly Jones was checking her hair for the past half hour in the mirror. Maybe she overdid it this time. She had brown with some light green here and there before but decided to go for something different now. She started to dye her hair in odd colours when she was fourteen. People, mainly teachers in school were terrified, but her granny only laughed and said she looked lovely every time.

She was just the best granny ever.

Molly brushed her hair a couple of more times before she finally gave in and decided to go to school. It was pointless to dwell on her hair and what the others might think. People never paid much attention to her, well not good attention anyway so why bother.

Her phone got a few notifications on her way to school on her skateboard. She checked them before the first period. She managed to get another story about the NY vigilantes last night and she was so excited she managed to edit and post it before going to sleep. It was her favourite past time especially when it started a conversation.

'Dude, did you notice the NYV story?' asked a freshman who had a locker close to hers.

'I know, it was so sick,' replied the other one. She kept her face straight, but she was enjoying it a lot. No one knew she was the sole creator of the website. It was a good thing. She wasn't up for people knowing and telling her their opinions what she should do with it. This was just fine. She really loved writing about them. She didn't want to brag, but she was pretty good at it.

'Oh my God! Great hair, particular girl!' said Jill sarcastically walking pass her with Nicole, two of the meanest bitches in school at least by her opinion based on all the BS they did to her and other kids. Then again cheerleaders and jocks were also terrible. Okay, there were a lot of terrible people but Nicole and Jill had a special place in the bully hierarchy.

'Next time maybe you can go bald?' asked Nicole before laughing out loud.

Molly rolled her eyes at them and walked away. She hated those two since Nicole filled her locker with earphones. She seriously hated when people started shout at her. First of all, she was not deaf! Just mute. Second, even if she was deaf what the hell would it help if they shouted? Some people were just pure garbage in Molly's opinion.

'Hey, do you think Jill and Nicole are only this stuck up because they know their parents don't really love them?' asked Owen as he put his arm around her and walked her to their next class. She grinned and nodded signing _totally_.

School was the worst place imaginable for her. Ever since she could remember Molly hated school. People always stared to act weirdly when the teacher told them she was mute and then started to bully or just their general BS.

Middle school was terrible. She used to skip school or hide every day in the bathrooms until the breaks were over and she was safe at least by having a teacher there.

Now it got a bit better. She was sophomore and she had a couple of friends she could hang out with. Also the bullying was mostly verbal not physical and she could totally handle the insults.

She usually just spent times sitting with her fellow weirdoes and waiting for the school to be over to hung out in places they didn't feel so alien. She only hung out with three people she considered friends Owen, the only opened gay since eleven and who came with a new conspiracy theory almost every day, Fat Corina who was the only girl on the wrestling team and the tallest and heaviest of all the people in school (she chose herself to be called fat Corina based on the idea from Pitch Perfect Fat Amy) and Amanda who used to draw manga, write and read manga yaoi fanfiction and date only boys from unpopular local bands. They were all weird in their own way, mostly eccentric or straight out wanting to cause people to know they are different. She liked her friends just fine. They were the odd bunch that people always talked about in a bad way, but together it was easy to face them.

Right now Amanda was drawing a little SpongeBob on her left sneaker while Owen explain to them why he think the government was trying to poison them with milk.

'Oh that reminds me,' started Fat Corina cutting in, 'Did you guys see the new post on NYV?'

Despite how much Molly loved her friends, there was one thing she couldn't tell even them. She knew how chatty Owen was and was honestly worried he might tell someone not to mention he would want to know everything about it once he would find out she had first had info for many of Vigilantes rescues.

They started to talk about it giving some ideas and some notes. Molly joined the conversation too trying her best not to give out any crucial detail. The thing was that when Molly started the website it was just a way to pass time.

One of the vigilantes first appearances at least one of the first people started to notice as acts of vigilantes was helping the bakery on her street from being vandalize. It caught her interested and she started to search the websites for other appearances and found a few people commenting and sharing a little bit of their stories. Before she knew it she had a website and was inviting people who experienced something familiar to come and write their story. She then spent hours editing it into a story worth ready. People started too noticed and it was slowly becoming a phenomenon. She was thrilled about it really especially since everyone was totally into it as well.

'Hey, Kim ready for the new season?' asked someone close by them and she made the mistake of looking up only to see Kim and her boyfriend holding hands and walking to their table.

Amanda mumbled something about cheerleader brain which caused the others to laugh, but Molly was a bit unfocused so she just offered a smile and tried to avoid looking at them.

Still after a moment she got this feeling someone was looking at her, she didn't look up fearing who it would have been.

* * *

Once school finally ended and she promised Fat Corina she would come to her match later that today, she went home.

Since her old chevy was once again broken she had to take a bus and then walk the last block. Derek offered to buy her a new car for her upcoming birthday, but she just didn't have it in her as she loved the stupid car too much.

One of her granny's friends would always fix it for a couple of bucks plus it made her feel like she wasn't a sellout to just give it to some junk yard. It was a good car after all.

Walking home meant she would pass local shops one of which was the already mentioned bakery. It looked good now. The vandals were scared straight from last time and the nice man who worried there with his daughter didn't seem to have problems anymore.

Molly couldn't help a small smile tuck the corner of her lips. She pulled out her phone and took a quick picture of the Bakery. She would make a new post about how the place is doing so much better thanks to the NY vigilantes.

Right next to the bakery was a comics store she used to spent most of her days if she was bored. Today, she didn't have time for it, but still it made her mind drift back to her own personal experience with the NY vigilantes.

* * *

 _Molly was on her way from work in the kids' centre. She decided she would go to the comics book store for a couple of hours before actually going home._

 _She fixed her beanie knowing all too well, she would change the colour of her hair again soon. Maybe next week. She was still playing with the idea of what colour she wanted now. So far purple and blonde were her too candidates._

' _Hey, space girl,' called the owner a forty something guy with dreads._

 _She waved at him and walked to her favourite section. She spent a good hour there before she decided to go with the original X-Men._

 _She waved again at the guy as he said good bye to her, 'Nighty night, space girl.'_

 _The walk down the street was relatively nice. It was dark and not too cold. She remembered something from earlier when suddenly someone grabbed her arm and snatched her._

 _They covered her mouth and dragged her a bit more into the alley. She felt the sharp object close to her neck. She wouldn't scream even without the man finally spinning her around and knocking over some trash can._

 _He threw her against the wall and put the knife close to her neck, 'Give me the bag, and I work hurt you.'_

 _She looked at the knife. It looked so sharp._

Seriously Molly? A knife looks sharp? That's a great observation skills.

 _This was something she feared most of the time she watched a thriller or horror movie being in a situation where all you can do is scream and not do it. Fuck her life._

' _I said give me the bag. Are you fucking deaf? Bitch, give me the bag!'_

 _She slowly started to pull down the backpack and handing it over. The man threw it over somewhere and then looked at her neck._

' _And that. Give me the necklace!' he said, but she didn't move. She couldn't move. She felt frozen in place looking at him and waiting for him to just stab her, but for the love of everything holy like Star Wars and Creepy Pasta she couldn't bring herself to hand him over the necklace her mom gave her._

 _The man cursed at her launching on her only to be suddenly lifted to the air and thrown across the dark alley._

 _She failed to move as she watched something large knock the guy with one quick hit while she noticed three other individuals fighting off some other people in the alley she didn't even notice before and didn't care for as she realize what she was seeing._

Turtles.

Four giant turtles.

 _Her mind immediately went over all her articles and post and videos only to come to ultimate conclusion._

They're real.

 _The fight ended quickly as they guys were no match for the obviously skilled turtle warriors._

 _All she could do was watch as one of the giant turtles took her backpack from the ground and walked toward her._

' _Here you go, babe.'_

 _She looked at her backpack and then at the creature. He was...real? Holy shit, this dude was real._

 _It was a real life ninja turtle._

 _She couldn't think of anything to do except to sign him_ thank you _her hand shaking a bit because fucking hell she just got almost mugged and she was saved by them._

 _He blinked at her confused before someone called in a very heavy Brooklyn accent, 'Dude, come on.'_

 _She watched the turtle shot her a quick wink before he rushed to what appeared to be his friends._

 _She was left paralyzed for a couple of more moments before she finally allowed herself to process what happened and get the hell out of there._

* * *

Until that moment she wasn't sure what she thought of the vigilantes. Sure, she was eternally grateful that they saved people and help them, but she wasn't sure if she was truly processing the whole giant green turtles thing.

She just thought it was big green armours which caused people to think they were seeing turtles.

To actually see them in action, she could tell those were no armours or costumes. They were the real deal.

She immediately went through all of her articles after that and checked to make sure she never used the work turtle to describe them as now she realize she could easy tip off their secret or something.

She also started once again from scratch to dig into them looking through her old research. Still ended up writing that article about the baker, and she never posted anything about their identity. She figured they wouldn't be too thrilled about either. She wasn't sure if she could call herself that and the irony didn't escape her, but she was the voice of the people who were saved by the turtles. People who was grateful and impressed and felt so much safer walking the streets now that they knew someone was watching. It started as a fun way to past time, but now she was like she had a duty to do her job and write about them.

Molly easily took a shower and new clothes before she rushed out of her apartment to Owen's car who came to pick her up.

As she got inside she noticed a text message from _At your own risk_.

Swallowing a bit Molly first ignored it until she finally gave in and opened it. As expected she was not too pleased by the content.

* * *

Mikey woke up quite later than usual. To be fair he was up pretty late/early when he came home after the patrol because Raph and Leo were at it again and then just went to play Fortnite with his friends.

He was never more grateful he didn't have school otherwise he would be dead on feet in school.

That would be a funny thought.

Slowly he got out of his room and went the kitchen where Leo was on making them breakfast? No, he missed breakfast so only lunch already. Sweet.

'Oh man, I love lazana,' said the youngest turtle and sat down already.

Raph snored at him finishing his coffee and got up, 'How about you help with setting the table, dumbass.'

Mikey rolled his eyes, but like a ball of energy which he was he quickly started to put down plates and prepare the table while babbling about his yesterday game season with his friends. It was awesome.

Right now he had the all star team with three other players. It was epic. They were seriously killing it.

He played a lot of things with many good players but it was usually one other person and they almost never spoke outside of their missions, now his teammates joked with him and even told random stuff.

So far he knew a couple of things about his teammates.

Bullet-Proof Joe, who sometimes had to checkup on his baby.

TitaniumMan69, who had to pretend he was asleep when his mom came to checkup on him so Mikey was sure he was like ten or so.

And FuryMachine344, who was usually staying up as late as him unless he had to go to school.

They were all alright mostly just joking and discussing missions but pretty cool.

They didn't share names, so they might have been lying about the things they said, but since Mikey would never actual meet with them it was fine.

They mostly spoke with each other expect for FuryMachine344's microphone was broken. He only wrote chat messages, but still they were pretty good probably the third or second best team so far which was pretty sick since they were four strangers.

'Is any of them from New York?' asked his father suddenly cutting of his rambling about it. Raph and Leo looked up at him and then at Master Splinter while Donnie remained with his head still in his notes.

Mikey blinked a bit caught off guard by the question, 'Uh, well, I don't really talk with them about that? I think Bullet-Proof Joe mentioned like typical London weather once so I guess his from UK. I don't know much about the others.'

Master Splinter nodded seeming satisfied with the answer, afterwards when he was helping Leo clean up his older brother casually said, 'You didn't...like say anything to them, right?'

Mikey frowned a bit confused again, 'Say what?'

'Like...never mind,' said Leo shaking his head and Mikey finally caught on, 'Dude, no, I wouldn't just give away our identity to some weirdoes in Fortnite. For all I know, they might be serial killers or pedos like FalconBoy777.'

Leo chuckled, 'The guy who wanted your pictures in gym clothes.'

'Yeah, and my undies. Sick fucker, still Donnie contacted the feds about his child porn shit so he got some time.'

'Yeah, we know you wouldn't do that. I'm glad you like your new team,' said Leo finishing the dishes.

Mikey grinned, 'Nah, they're pretty cool in video games, but they're not my _team_ team. You ugly turtles are the only team I need.'

Leo grimaced, 'Jeez, Mikey, you say the nicest things.'

'Yeah, I know,' he elbowed him lightly and laughed a bit finishing the dishes.

It was true. His brothers were his team. His best friends. When they were little, they were all they had and since they were four boys of course they were always training, fighting and playing together. It was natural. Over the time though, it became clear that although they were close and all, they were very different individuals.

He could tell that sometimes Leo just needed a break from them to meditate, or Donnie was almost inching to start working on a new project in his lab, or Raph just wanted to work out or get rid of the rage inside him with the boxing bag. They were family, brothers, but they still needed to do their own thing. It was okay. You couldn't force people to do things they didn't want to.

Games, movies, comic books and shit were always his thing. He loved all that dorky stuff. He was into youtube funny videos and just fun things. Normal teenage things.

Ironic, right? A giant turtle into ordinary teen stuff.

* * *

It wasn't that Molly hated gym, but if she could pick between stabbing herself with a needle and doing track runs in November, stabbing one that match. They just finished another class and she was getting dress to leave.

She was tired and annoyed and just wanted to go home log in and crush opponent's team with her people. She wanted to log in and team up with _1BigHero1_ _Bullet-Proof Joe_ and _Titaniumman69_ and not think about school like for another twelve hours.

She noticed Kim Sawyer walking over to Jay McClaud. She was surprised by this as people usually tried to well not avoid cold blonde more like keep their distance. It was like when you know there was an ice statute in the park you went close enough to admire but not actually close enough to touch it.

Some things were just meant to be worshiped, Jay McClaud was one of those things.

'The tryouts for the team are this Friday. We could really use your help,' said Kim and Molly would have let out a laugh if it was possible. Right. You could use another white pretty girl to fill the ranks left by the seniors. Gosh, this was just a white girl high school cliché.

Rolling her eyes she started to stuff things into her gym bag.

Jay told her she wasn't cheerleader material and Kim continued to pressure her.

Molly hurried out of the gym almost hitting Nicole with the door.

'Damn it, are you blind too?' snapped the brunette. Too bad she didn't actually hit her.

Molly flipped her the finger and hurried out of that hell hole with a smug smile on her face of course just as she was close to the door someone yanked her by the sleeve of her jacket back to the corner of the hallway.

 _Matt_

Just her fucking luck.

'Hey, uh, I'm sorry about last time. I had…Kim was calling me nonstop and I panicked,' he said and Molly rolled her eyes trying to leave.

'No, wait, Molly, please,' he stroke her cheek. How was it and words like _please_ and _I'm sorry_ and a soft stroke on the cheek was all it took for her to just be this poor excuse of a girl ready to make out with him in an abandon classroom.

'Please Molly. Let me make it up to you,' he said and nodded at her while she looked away annoyed.

 _Why? Why? Why? Do I always let myself get drag into this? WHY?_

Molly looked at him before she quickly signed, _You are going to make up sooo much for it. Come at nine-ish._

She felt a bit of guilt and pride as she managed to walk away with that. It was always a mixture of the two. On one hand, she was with a guy who was cheating on his girlfriend, the most perfect and sweet girl she ever knew. On the other hand, she was sticking it up to all those bitches who thought she was trash. Look at her now, scoring the hottest boy in school.

 _I will burn in hell for this._

She got home and threw her stuff on the bed before she log in and started to play. Everyone was mostly up and playing crushing their opponents until little by little everyone had to do some shit.

1BigHero1 was the last left with her.

She checked the watched. Still twenty minutes before nine. Still being on time wasn't Matt's strongest suit.

 _ **1BigHero1: Got some fun plans for later?**_

 _FuryMachine344: Yeah, a friend is coming over. Then some homework. U?_

 _ **1BigHero1: Going out with my brothers. I have this ongoing game going on about how long with it take for me to ruin my brother's selfcontrol.**_

She blinked at the words. It wasn't uncommon she chatted with her team, but this was new. This felt personal.

She tapped a bit close to the key board before she wrote.

 _With what?_

 _ **Dad jokes.**_

Molly chuckled even if it couldn't be heard.

 _Like actual dad jokes?_

 _ **Yup, the dummer the better. So far the best one is What do you call a man with a rubber toe?**_

She already felt herself giggling.

 _What?_

 _ **Roberto.**_

She covered her mouth knowing it was so lame and ridiculous she was mute, but the joke was just so...stupid it actually cracked her up.

 _ **I know you're laughing.**_

 _Not true, prove it._

 _ **Damn, it sucks you can't put smiley faces here.**_

She heard her phone vibrate.

She looked at it actually a bit annoyed Matt was on time for once.

She wrote to the guy fake gmail account. She didn't have any friends or any connection to her real account there, it was just for shitty things when she needed to registrate but didn't really want to.

 _Chat me there later_.

She logout with that and went to let Matt in. Her nana went to dance class with her friends so they had a couple of hours.

'Hey, pretty girl,' he kissed her softly stroking her hair a bit, 'Did I tell you how amazing the hair looks?'

She made a thinking face while pressing her finger against her chin before she shook her head playing to disappointed.

'Looks like I have a lot of things to make up for,' he joked and lifted her up into his arms. He was so much bigger than her, but she didn't mind.

He carried her to her and bed before he started to kiss her and slowly undress her slowly losing himself inside her.

When they were done he went to checkout her wall, 'Can't imagine what they're like.'

She blinked while brushing her hair.

'Just deciding to go protect the streets,' he said and shrugged his shoulders while getting dressed.

'I wouldn't have the balls to do that,' he told her.

She smiled a bit before taking his hand.

He returned the smile and pulled her hand closer to kiss it.

'I'm sorry about before.'

She waved her hand at him and went to sit on her chair. It was always like this. Not come, or be late and then apologize and she always gave into it. Into him. She had to. She loved him.

 _You have to go now?_ She signed calmly waiting for the answer.

He nodded, 'Yeah, some guys want me to do this prank with them. Nothing heroic as these guys though.'

She grimaced and nodded.

He kissed her one more time before he was out of the door again.

Molly didn't dwell on his comings and goings. She got used to it. It was a terrible thing to get use to but she did. She fully accepted the role of another woman.

Slowly she stood up from her chair and walked to the wall Matt was always so fascinated about.

It was covered in different blurry images and articles about the masked warrior AKA Ninja turtles. No one really knew they were _actual_ turtles. Well, not from her site at least.

She told Matt she was an enthusiast so she would explain the articles.

Sighing to herself she looked at the unmade bed. She had to put the sheets to washing now. Once again that terrible disgusting feeling settled inside her stomach telling her what she was doing was beyond horrible and cruel.

She busied herself by cleaning her room and doing her homework. She took a couple of hours nap before she checked the new stories people submitted and edited the first two for the website.

The Turtles saved someone again. They always either saved someone or protected and someone always wrote the story about it which she edited from a 1st point view. It felt like it would most relate to people that way.

Once she was done, she went to check her fake email. There was a checkbox as well and a notification that someone was trying to add the email to their contacts.

She immediately knew who it was and added him. It took about five minutes before she got a message with another dad joke.

She laughed and typed back.

 _So lame, dude. Why aren't you asleep? It's like 4 a.m._

 _ **Just got back with my brothers. I wanted to text you first before I faint to sleep.**_

 _Tough night?_

 _ **You wouldn't believe. (smiley face)**_

Molly found it strange that her Fornite teammate was out drinking on a school day, but then again she didn't know how old he was. She was sure _Bullet-Proof Joe_ was an adult with a kid since he often spoke about going to checkup on the baby and _Titaniumman69_ was totally some middle schooler since he had to be in bed when his mom came to checkup.

She assumed _1BigHero1_ was young based on the slang he used, but it wasn't rocket science. He might be a forty year old for all she knew. Okay, thirty, he was really too good in Fortnite to be forty.

 _ **What about you? Did you and your buddy watch a movie or something?**_

 _Or something. (Winky face)_

 _ **Gross, dude, just gross. Like Oberyn's head goes pop gross!**_

Molly raised her brows.

 _That was your it on the gross thermometer? What about the Red Wedding or Aria killing the house of Frey feeding the asshole his own sons?_

 _ **First of all Red Wedding was emotionally gross on stomach gross and Aria killing the Frey house was BADASS, Fury, BADASS!**_

Molly rolled her eyes and ended up writing with him until her alarm clock went off and she was forced to get ready for school. She wrote him during class once, but since he didn't reply she assumed he must have fainted into sleep as he called it.

Still it got her to think some more about GoT and other shows as well as other things she could talk with him later. She was kind of looking forward to it. A lot actually.


	10. The Peculiar Girl 02

**The Peculiar Girl**

* * *

 _There is no illness quite like loneliness and there is no cure quite like love – Jessica Katoff_

* * *

Matt McCohen AKA _At your own risk_ sort of just happened to Molly the way accidents happen to good people. It was the end of the middle school and she was incredibly nervous about going to a new school without her big brother, Derek gone.

He was going to join the army soon and go oversea. She fucking hated the idea and told him how it look like he was giving into capitalistic believes, but she was mostly just worried than actually angry. With him she at least had someone around. Without him it would just be her and her Nana and she loved her dearly, but sometimes she needed people close to her own age.

Anyway, middle school ended and she was working in the local kid's centre for kids with special needs. Many kids were deaf so her sing language skills came very much in handy.

It was refreshing to spent time with people who were just like her and didn't find the fact that she couldn't talk and had to sign everything all that weird. People never understand how important or essential is to communicate with others. Despite her disadvantage Molly loved to talk, too bad not many people could understand her.

Right at the start of the summer a couple of kids from the Catholic Church started to come to help out from one of their church programs. It wasn't uncommon actually. Churches were very helpful when it came to different programs or events.

' _Hi, you're Molly, right?' asked one of_ the church boys _on his first day, 'Uh, Joe send me over. He said that you will help me find the equipment room?'_

 _Molly nodded a bit awkwardly and pushed her beanie a bit backwards not sure if it was because she was a bit shy to be around people who were...well normal...or because the fact that he was a cute boy with a very nice smile._

 _She led him to the room and pointed at it._

 _He didn't seem to mind one bit that she wasn't speaking and continued to smile before he signed_ thank you.

' _I'm a bit rusty, but Joe said you can hear me so that helps,' he said and Molly smiled a bit glad he wasn't shouting at her like people tend to when she signed something and they assume she was deaf. Why the hell did they think shouting would help was beyond her._

 _Molly signed_ you're welcome _. She stood silently in front of him for a moment not sure what to do now so she just smiled awkwardly telling herself she was an idiot and walking away._

' _Hey, uh, I'm Matt, by the way,' he called after her. She spun around and looked at him, he was still smiling at her with this sweet smile on his face._

 _Molly smiled back at him and signed_ nice to meet you.

' _N-nice to meet you too,' he said and she returned to her work with this large smile on her face and her heart beating like a drum._

That was the first time she ever fell in love and like most first loves beautiful, unbelievably intense and heartbreaking.

When he looked at her across from his table, his eyes kept on her for a couple of moments before he winked at her. Unfortunately, the first love was still ongoing.

She fixed her beanie a bit looked down at her phone while Fat Corina told them about her upcoming match and how she was planning to crush the other school's puny boys. (She liked to go all Hulk on them so)

Her phone suddenly showed her another text message. She felt her stomach make a flip as she was expecting it to be from Matt asking for another secret time together, but instead it was from Mi.

She smiled to herself as she read.

 _ **Dude, did you see the new promo for Flash? That looks sick!**_

She quickly texted back.

 _No spoilers, dork. Some of us are still in school!_

 _ **Some of you guys are super lame.**_

 _Dork._

 _ **Takes one to know one.**_

Her smile caught the attention of one of her friends, Owen who leaned over her shoulder, 'New love interest?'

She rolled her eyes at him. True was not even her closest friends knew about Matt. When she started high school and saw Matt was dating Kim, she felt so utterly ashamed and heartbroken she just...she just lied and told everyone about a Church boy she used to go out with _Bill_. She felt utterly humiliated that she thought things could be different.

She put the phone down.

 _A friend from Fortnite. He's pretty cool._

'Cool like an average teen? Or cool like a weirdo who wants you to send nudes?' asked Owen and she chuckled before she raised one finger.

'Whatever you say, dear.'

* * *

Still Molly's new friendship was a little getting on the fact that she was a tiny bit behind her school work. Not her NYV of course not. She would be rather caught dead then to be behind on that. Anyway, she was falling behind some of her school work like calculus and biology.

She never liked biology. In middle school her teacher tended to ask her questions even though she knew she couldn't answer and then always made an annoying sound when she remembered. Like it was her fault or something that she was mute? What a bitch!

Anyway, she posted a new video just a couple of hours ago. She was pretty hyped but promised herself she wouldn't check for comments and stuff until later. It would be her zen time.

Just as she was walking down the hallway, she heard the familiar sounds of the fight from the video she spent editing the better part of last night.

She looked to the side and spotted Jay McClaud with her head on her phone checking the video. Sure, plenty of people in her school were into the video, so she wasn't surprised people like the ice queen blonde Jay McClaud who was too good for everyone or perfect Kim Sawyer or even Bitch Nicole Diaz were all into her site.

Still Jay looked weird. She watched as the blonde stood frozen by her locker her eyes fixed on the phone almost as if she was not breathing.

For some reason Molly found herself coming closer.

It was then that the blonde looked up and their eyes met. Unsure why Molly nodded at her phone. It seemed easier than to try and signed her anything.

Jay looked down at her phone, 'Uh, I just like the...vigilantes?'

Molly raised her brows as high as possible because _Jay McClaud_ shuttering or hesitated was not something you saw very often.

'I like the new hair,' said the blonde.

Molly smiled and signed _it ends well_ before she went to walk away.

She knew Jay from Freshman English. She knew she was prettiest girl in school and the most reserved. She almost never spoke with anyone unless spoken too, and almost no guy was worth of her attention. Still people loved her.

She remembered how Jay was once blankly staring in front of her probably not even realizing she was looking directly at someone and the guys in the basketball team were all over the gym fighting over who was the lucky guy she was staring at. Pathetic.

Molly wondered if Jay was really all that. A stone cold hearted bitch who didn't care about anyone just passing the halls knowing she was all _that_.

* * *

'AWESOME!' shouted Mikey early in the morning/midday as he was eating cereals and watching the new video the NYV posted of them. Fucking amazing.

'LEO, BRO, COME CHECK THIS OUT!' he called.

'MIKEY! SHUT THE FUCK UP!'

'LANGUAGE RAPHAEL!' called their father, 'MICHELANGELO, I AM WATCHING MY SHOW!'

'SORRY SENSEI,' called Mikey before he was about to shout Leo's name again just as the turtle rushed to the kitchen annoyed.

'Mikey, is it really something so important to wake up the whole house?!' asked Leo annoyed as he walked into their kitchen looking weirdly grumpy.

'Sure is, come see, come see,' he came half way to him as he showed him his phone watching as he and Leo were in blurry quality fighting with the purple dragon punks, 'Isn't it awesome. We're _so_ cool, bro.'

Mikey was excided while Leo didn't look so impressed.

'Okay, well, it is hard to tell what we are so it's fine...I guess.'

'Leo, this isn't _fine_. This is awesome. Look at us. We rock!' said Mikey watching the video over and over again.

He loved the website New York Vigilantes. It was a website which came out a couple of months ago during the summer. People all over New York were submitting their stories, pictures and videos and the editor of the website posted them. He was really into since the editor made them look like real heroes, which they were but appreciation was always welcome.

He liked that the website allowed him and his brothers to be able to see what happened after their rescue or encounters with the Purple Dragon gang or the Foot. He liked to know what happened to the little men they saved and left for them to walk home.

He couldn't help, but wonder if the editor was also someone they rescue. Sure, it had to be since who would go out of their way like this to write about them and make them the heroes. Either way whoever he was Donnie assumed must have known they were turtles.

' _There is never any clear shot of us or footage and on more than one occasion I noticed that a post was removed where someone mentioned the words like green turtle like or anthropomorphic.'_

 _When they all gave him a confused he rolled his eyes and said, 'Non-human.'_

' _Oh!'_

' _Right!'_

' _Make sense.'_

Donnie seriously must have felt like he was surrounded by idiots some times. Master Splinter constant forgetting how to handle the remote didn't help.

Anyway, back to NYV. Mikey was in love with that website.

He was tempted. Oh shell, was he tempted to write to the editor, or to comment, or just to...communicate in some way. But since they had a rule about never revealing their identity he had to hold back. When he didn't actually write anything, he got these doubts thinking what would he even write.

 _ **Hey, it's me, one of the vigilantes. Right cause that would go well.**_

People would assume he is lying and roast him or the editor would just remove his comment.

No, this was okay. The website was a bright light in his hidden heroism letting him know people were grateful and the world was a better place thanks to them. In its own way it was enough for him. He would like to think he was passed the need to be thanked and well noticed for his achievement. He used to pull some pretty stupid things when he was trying to get attention. Things which almost ended in them being caught.

Mikey shook his head returning to the video not wanting to think about _that_ incident anymore.

He heard Leo sighed suddenly and Mikey looked over at him, 'You okay there, bro?'

He gave him a tight smile, 'All good.'

Mikey shot him a look. He could sense something was up with his big brother. He was acting really weird lately. Like he was stressed and yet happy at the same time.

Very strange.

He didn't think his brothers were stereotypes.

But there wasn't much his brothers could do that would surprise him. For example if Donnie just went to watch Tv or play video games all day, or if Raph would be all zen of stuff Mikey would be freaked out for sure thinking they had gone insane.

Leo was...Leo was always the leader. He was basically the type you knew had it all figure out. He was always into training and ninjitsu mythology, old folklore legends, and just... _boring_ stuff. He wondered if it was burden of the first born to never be a troublemaker. It often felt like Leo had them in care. Like _take care of your brothers, Leonardo._

And boy was that an ungrateful job. He once had to take care of Master Splinter when he was sick. They took turns who would stay with him while the others patrolled and when it was his turn he felt like he was the adult and...okay, never mind not important. What was important was that Leo was acting like something was bothering him.

'You look a bit stress?'

It wasn't that Donnie was always working or something or doing research or that Raph was working out and hotheaded dynamite ready to explode. But Leo...he was always Mr. _I got this_ now he looked like he was losing his shell over something.

Mikey waited for his reply, but Leo just shook his head, 'I'm good, thanks for the concern.'

His phone vibrated, and he noticed Leo freezing for a moment before he looked at it.

'New message?' Mikey asked jokingly.

Leo looked tensed as he said, 'No-uh, my battery is dead.'

He hurried out of the kitchen before Mikey could say another word.

Weird. He should definitely look that up.

He watched the video two more times before he decided to share it with Master Splinter, who told him he wasn't practicing his kicks properly to Raph who got upset that he missed the fight.

Once he finally came to Donnie his brother was completely focused on his news project.

'What'cha up to?'

Donnie then unlashed a couple of foreign words on Mikey which proved that he would have no idea what his brother way doing anyway.

'Okay, anyway, check out the new video of me and L-'

'I already saw it,' said Donnie without taking his eyes from the device he was working on with a screwdriver.

'Okay? When?' asked Mikey feeling a bit down that he wouldn't be the 1st to show him.

'I check all the videos posted on the site just in case there would have been a good shot of us,' said Donnie before he looked at him, 'Didn't you know?'

'No, but that's good to know. Uh, anyway, listen, don't you ever get the feeling that something is off with Leo?' asked Mikey slowly. He wasn't sure if talking about Leo behind his back wasn't like breaking the brother code or something.

'Like what?' asked Donnie still not bothering to stop working.

'Like I don't know he's all smiling one minute and then he's all like moody and deep in thoughts kind of like...whoa,' Mikey chuckled, 'Like he's in love, you know, like they show you in romcoms and shit. _Oh Edward. Oh Bella. Oh Jack. Oh Rose. Oh Mr. Spock-_ '

'Please don't start with your Spoke/Kirk fanboying,' said Donnie a bit annoyed.

Mikey raised his hand, 'All I am saying if the show started in today's word. They would for sure be a couple, but since it was the 60s they couldn't exactly show _manly_ love on screen.'

'Mikey~'

'Right, back to big bro Leo, what do you think is up with him?' asked the youngest turtle.

Donnie shrugged his shoulders, 'Who knows? Maybe he's just thinking about things. He hasn't played the guitar for a while. He might just need a new hobby,' said the other brother, but Mikey wasn't buying it.

'I still thinks it's something more serious like he's sick or gay or-'

'What's up with you and homosexuality lately, Mikey?'

'Hey, it's a factor. I mean look there's four of us so there is a big chance one of us swings for the other team. Sausage team.'

Donnie made a disgusting face, 'With the way we all drooled over April the first time she came. Doubt that.'

'Oh right, how is she? How's D.C?'

'She sounded excited. She should call at the end of the week if you want to talk to her,' said Donnie and smiled a bit but it didn't reach his eyes.

'Sounds great. Did she say what's new with her?'

'Not much. She mostly talked about her work. Her story is looking good. She said she can't wait to come back to NY though,' he returned to his work fully.

Mikey nodded wondering if Donnie would talk about the _guy_ April casually mentioned on her last skype call. He wasn't lying about them drooling over her. The chick was their first human contact ever. Well, the first time it went well and they actually got a friend from the whole encounter. They were four teenage male and she was a hot woman so damn right they were all crushing on her a bit. Still, they all quickly fell out of it as they came terms of her being like their big sister than a love interest, well, most of them. He and the others did notice that Donnie was acting a bit different when April was offered a job in D.C, but since their bother or friend didn't say anything they weren't sure what was going on there. Now it looked like it was nothing just some strange feeling in the back of their minds, but maybe before that it actually was something else.

'Okay, so give me a heads up the next time she calls. I'll go kill time before training,' said Mikey and went to his room just as he was passing Raph's he heard he started to play the drums and rolled his eyes.

 _ **Who's great idea was it to give drums to a hothead like him again? Oh right, mine.**_

His phone beeped with a new message and he smirked before he opened gmail.

 _FurryMachine344: You can't honestly claim you like Weird Al. Like not mockingly like him, but actually like him? What's wrong with you? Did you're parents forced you to sleep in the closet and listen to him on repeat?_

Mikey stopped in track and chuckled at the raw accusation. Man, this guy was epic. Since exchanging their dummy emails. They had been chatting and sending emails for weeks now. It was awesome because apart from the guy being a pro at Fortnite, their teams was slowly becoming the number 1 team by the way, this guy was amazingly burning the hell out of him and Mikey enjoyed it. It was always cool to speak with people about this kind of shit. His brothers were great, but sometimes he just needed to talk to someone else. April was cool too, but she wasn't so much into TV, movies, comics and games the way this dude was.

 _ **Says the dude who likes Sinatra. How old are you man? Sixty?**_

 _A hundred and four. So what are you up to today? Got a few hours for Fortnite later?_

 _ **Definitely. I will have to go train a bit with my bros though, but then I am all in.**_

 _Train? What are you training?_

This caused Mikey to pause. It was always hard to lie to people when they straight out ask you something. Like he knew no one would ask him if he was a giant green turtle who lived in the sewer, but when they asked things...simple things, it felt hard to lie. He knew he had to because it would be a problem in the future if he let something slip but still.

 _ **Just some light workout with my brothers.**_

 _Oh, cool. I tried to workout a couple of times, but ultimately I'm too lazy for it. So I just pull allnighters to get rid of the extra energy._

 _ **Hey, playing games is workout too. I once sprained my wrist while playing Call of duty for almost ten hours.**_

 _I would totally put playing games on the Olympic list. Like When Der and I were playing guitar hero we definitely lost a couple of pounds._

 _ **Who's Der?**_

 _Older brother. He's in the army now._

 _ **Sounds cool. Is it just the two of you?**_

 _..._

For a very long time there was no answer just three dots telling him that his online pal writing something before the answer came.

 _Yes._

Mikey was confused at this. Why would it take so long to answer? He felt something odd. Like some sort of sadness inside him for some reason.

He quickly typed.

 _ **Sorry if I upset you, bro.**_

 _No, it's cool. Uh, yeah, it's just me and Der and well our Nana._

Mikey cursed at himself before he quickly typed.

 _ **Again, sorry, I didn't want to upset you.**_

 _It's okay. I mean. I'm use to it by now. What about you? Siblings, parents?_

Mikey knew he couldn't actually tell him the truth, but because of the whole conversation, he felt it would be weird if he didn't say anything. Plus, he didn't want to lie for some reason.

Before he could stop himself he quickly typed.

 _ **There's four of us and our dad so we are pretty much tripping over each other at times.**_

 _Aha, so a full house then._

 _ **Totally.**_

They chatted for a couple of hours before Donnie came to tell him it was time to train. He quickly log out and went with his brothers jumping on Donnie's back in the process.

'Mikey, get off,' yelped the turtle almost falling with him, but he quickly found his balance.

Leo shook his head while Raph looked amuse.

Mikey got down and winked at his brother, 'Come on, Donnie. A true ninja is always prepared for everything.'

Before he knew it he got hit by a frisbee into the ankle and collapsed on his back earning a chuckle and laughter from his brothers.

He looked up and found Master Splinter giving him an unimpressed look, 'Indeed Michelangelo, a true ninja is _always_ prepared and never underestimates the situation.'

Mikey grinned at their father before Donnie lent him a hand to help him up. He didn't need it, but he still smiled at him and went to take his position down by their training area.

* * *

Molly was eating her breakfast in the kitchen when her Nana asked, 'What has gotten you so happy in the morning?'

She looked up from her phone. She hadn't even realized she was smiling until now. Since she exchanged her contact with 1BigHero1 they had been chatting almost nonstop about movies, TV shows, games and music. It was so refreshing to have another person apart from Owen, Amanda and Corina to discuss these things and others.

Right now, they had been talking about the newest Blizzard's Epic Fall and the hero in the red shirt who called out their new Diablo for phones an _out of season april's joke_. Both of them had been trolling the shit out of Blizzard and the guy since early morning.

Molly shrugged her shoulders before she signed her.

Nana made an interested face, 'A new friend? Boy or girl?'

Molly shrugged her shoulders again.

 _I don't know. I only know his game name from Fortnite._

'Aha, so it's even more interesting. I hope you are careful. With these online things it is never easy to tell who are you talking to,' said her Nana as she placed a coffee mug on her table.

Molly rolled her eyes but nodded. It was true. Her online friend might just as easily be a pedo or some freak, but for now he was just some cool guy who liked the same shit she did, so she was fine with it.

'Don't be late for school. Just because the car is working now, doesn't mean you won't get stuck somewhere.' Warned her Nana and Molly quickly got up kissing her cheek before she rushed to the door.

She grabbed her backpack which was starting to rip on the side and went outside. She would fix it later today.

Another message popped on her phone and she quickly replied.

 _Hey, we should call each other something. Sometimes I want to like address you but writing Big Hero feels weird._

 _ **...**_

For a very long time there were only three dots and Molly had to wonder if maybe BigHero wasn't a girl too and didn't want to tell her name in case she thought Molly was a pedo.

 _ **Okay, do you want to exchange names?**_

She thought about it. Telling him or her his name kind of didn't sound like a good idea. For now, she was sure he thought she was a boy which was fine by her. Plus the whole pedo possibility. The hesitation in her/his reply also made her feel like she was pushing him into something he wasn't okay with. They had been chatting only for a couple of weeks after all.

 _How about first letters? Call me Mo._

 _ **Mo? Okay, cool. Nice to meet you, Mo. I'm Mi.**_

She raised her brows not buying it.

 _So you're telling me I said Mo and you're Mi? Kind of a weird coincidence don't you think?_

 _ **Definitely, I'm totally expecting you to try and get my nudes now.**_

She got to the car laughing.

 _Yeah, for sure, send me the cute ones in your pink tongs. Gotta go. I'm driving._

 _ **Drive safe.**_

She easily drove to school without the car stopping or an accident which she was grateful for. She really loved her chevy. She parked right next to a pretty nice looking silver Porsche. Honestly, she would repark, but it was always hard to find a good parking spot so she prayed it wasn't Nicole or Jill or Carrie's car.

When she got out she momentary froze as she noticed Kim texting something on her phone standing next to the car.

The cheerleader must have felt her gaze because she looked up at her and smiled. She put the phone away and signed while saying, 'Good Morning.'

Of course, Kim knew sign language. She was little Miss perfect. She knew _everything_. She was good at everything. It was wonder she didn't have a statue or picture right at the entrance of the school.

Molly nodded and signed back before she went to school. Luckily Kim stayed by her car.

From the corner of her eyes the girl with pinkish hair noticed a familiar car pulling to the parking lot.

 _Matt_

She rushed inside finding Corina and Owen by his locker and joined them. Guilt was a funny thing. You felt bad, but if you did something enough times and convicted yourself it was okay, the guilt was only a dull pain. She wondered if this was how people who lost a limb felt. Like there is something there, even when it is not.

It was hard to explain what she felt whenever she saw Kim Sawyer.

When she first came to school and found out Kim and Matt were dating. She figured it would be just that. Her little romance, her first love, crashing with reality that a guy like Matt would never be with a girl like her. He was golden boy who's family put all their hopes into him while Molly was a mute orphan who lived with her Nana and older brother. Some people who used to go to her middle school too, knew her dad got killed while selling drugs and her mom was just...gone. Girls like her didn't go out with guys like Matt. Their little encounter was just a summer fling not an actual love story.

Then he waited for her outside of kid's centre and begged her to give me ten minutes to explain.

Looking back Molly often wondered what would have happened if she just told him to go to hell? Would she live with a better conscious? Would she maybe find someone better for her? Someone who didn't have a girlfriend? Someone real and honest and...it didn't matter in the end.

Molly gave him those damn ten minutes, and Matt explained to her that his parents were old folks who couldn't have kids. He explained how they adopted him and how they basically put all their hopes into him. They were very religious and they always wanted Matt to be a good obeyed boy. He went on and on about how being with her was the first time he actually did something for himself instead of for them.

She liked to think it was true.

His parents were good friends with Sawyers and since Kim was single, they pressured the two into dating. He explained how he and Kim figured it would be easier to just give in then to fight their parents and how basically neither of them was in love.

' _I love you, Molly,' he said taking her hand, 'I know this is...crazy like beyond insane, but I have to date Kim for my folks and hers. I don't want to. She's not...she not you.'_

 _Every single word he said spoke to her heart making it impossible to say no._

' _We...we can still met. We can still at least hang out, right?' he asked carefully, but Molly already had something else in mind._

 _She stepped on her toes and kissed Matt for the first time since his work in the kids' centre ended. The kiss was urgent and demanding showing just how much she missed him._

 _He pulled her closer kissing her back for a couple of moments until he broke the kiss and hugged her, 'We could...we could make it work. We could...like it could be our secret. We would meet up and just be us.'_

 _She hugged him back nodding against him._

So they started to date again in secret while he and Kim dated in public which caused Molly to feel guilty. Even if Kim was only pretending to be in love with Matt it felt...it was cheating. She and Matt were cheating on Kim behind her back. She would feel better if Kim was doing the same with some other guy, but she had a feeling Kim really was _all_ that honest and great and good which made it even worse because how the hell do you _hate_ someone like that?

'Yo peculiar!' shouted some guy, 'Love the shorts.'

She looked down at her green shorts. What the hell was wrong with them?

When she looked back up she flipped the asshole and started to walk away.

 _Fuck that asshole._

Another message.

 _ **Hey Mo. Is Mo for Montgomery. If yes, do you have a Smithers?**_

It took her a moment to catch on before she smirked and texted back.

* * *

Mikey just finished another game with his team when Leo knocked on his door, 'Mikey, do you have a minute? I have something to tell you guys.'

He blinked, 'Yeah, sure, bro. I'll be out in a sec.'

He quickly typed to his friends he would be back soon and went outside.

Raph and Master Splinter were already on the couch while Don was finally coming from his workshop.

He noticed his gameboy on the ground and picked it up. He hadn't played for a while with it so he turned it on and started to play while walking to the couch.

Honestly, he wasn't playing much attention to what Leo was telling them until Donnie elbowed him.

He shot him a look just as Raph said, 'Say that again.'

Leo sighed, 'There is a girl and I'm...friends with her.'

'Wait, you're meeting with her? On purpose?' asked Raph standing up looking murderous again.

Mikey put the gameboy away slowly trying to process what was happening. There was a _girl_?

'Yes.'

'What? I?' Raph turned to Master Splinter and now so did Mikey, but he could see their Master looked completely calm. He knew about this then.

'What is this? Are you insane? Who is she and why the hell would you continue to meet with her? We have rules!'

'Oh my God, I can't believe it,' said Mikey finally catching on, 'I was right? Leo is in love? He has a girlfriend. Oh my God. I WAS RIGHT!' he rambled not noticing how Raph and Leo were full on shouting at each other and then literally shoving each other.

'Break it up with your girlfriend, Leo or so help me God-'

'Shove it, Raphael, this has nothing to do with you.'

'SO WHAT? Now all of us can go and get a girl or what? What makes you so special that you can tell our secret...'

'I didn't tell her anything. It was an accident because you ran off like usual into a fight and I ended up without a backup. I fell into someone's house. Thank God Jay got me out. I didn't tell her anything she just helped me. No screaming no nothing.'

'So what you followed her and started to hook up!'

'Raphael, please,' said the Master his tone leaving no more room for argument.

Raph looked at their Master angry as hell.

Mikey and Donnie stood up as if they were all feeling Raph's rage. Now, some fun facts about Raph. He was an asshole and a hothead. Mikey couldn't even count the times he had exploded and went all berserker on them causing problems. But he never ever got angry at their Master. He attacked all of them at least five times. Mikey about five times a week, but never their Master. Even a hothead like Raph knew he was their father and loved and respected him. However, looking at him now, how freaking upset he was Mikey had a very bad feeling that he would do something he would regret forever.

No one moved for a moment as Raph suddenly shook his head, 'You know what? Fuck it. Of course you get some special treatment. We can't say jack to anyone or reveal ourselves, but fearless here gets to have a cute girlfriend. Friggin' fantastic.'

Raph pushed his way past Mikey who frowned at him before he walked away out of the tunnels and out of the lair.

Leo sighed trying to calm down visibly still shaken. Yup, Raph had definitely that effect on people.

Their older brother looked at them. Now, he was probably waiting for the two of them to say their mind, but Mikey honestly had no issue here. So Leo found himself a chick apparently a good one since she helped him get out of the house, he mentioned before. Leo was basically a nomad, no way in hell would Mikey ever think _he_ would score a girl, but if he thought she was good enough to know about them and risk their secret. She had to be.

He was the first one to walk toward Leo, who was still looking like he was in front of an acceptance committee.

He put his hand on his shoulder, 'Hey, man. It's cool,' he grinned at his older brother who looked relieved, 'So...can we meet her? Like family dinner? Or is it not that serious yet to meet the folks?'

Leo actually chuckled at that and Mikey grinned even wider knowing he calmed his brother nerves.

Donnie gave him a small smile, 'As long as you're happy...and she's not a treat.'

'She's not,' assured him Leo.

His Master walked up to him as well, 'It is good to be honest my son. Raphael will calm down eventually and return.'

Mikey nodded. Sure, Raph was well complicated turtle, but once he would get the hang of the situation he would deal with it. In the mean time Mikey took his phone and said, 'Name please. I want to see how hot this chick of your really is.'

'Michelangelo,' said Master Spliter disapproving, but he raised his brows at Leo in a seductive manner and his brothers laughed.

* * *

He didn't manage to get info about the girl from Leo, so of course he did a little bit of spying. Not too much, just to see where she lives and what she looked like.

He tried it about three times before he finally managed to find it, and still it was mostly because he knew Leo was going to a certain destination. His big bro was a pro at covering his tracks and tailing. It took him about two hours before he finally realize he was purposely leading him to a different part of town completely.

He tried to look at it as a strategy game and based on all the locations Leo had gone he managed to determinate where he would definitely end up even if he was going taking different ways.

Man, Leo was suspicious and untrusting as hell.

Mikey decided to check the girl when he was one hundred percent sure Leo wasn't there. Donnie was unknown to him his partner in crime. Mikey lied to Leo claiming he lost a bet and went to fill his end of the bet when really he was going to the girl's place.

He got to the roof of the opposite building next to the one the girl lived in.

Her window was closed but the blinds were open and the light was on. It was the only room which still had light on at this hour.

He didn't see much just someone with blonde hair sitting on what must have been the bed looking down. What was she doing up so late?

Getting closer was totally not an option, if she saw him and told Leo he would be dead for sure.

With a sigh he decided to leave, but just as he was getting from his hiding spot, he spotted his brother jumping at the fire escape from the roof of Jay's building.

He froze in place almost certain his brother saw him and would now come to yell at him when in reality the window opened and the girl looked out of it.

Mikey let out a relieved sigh and looked closely.

She was pretty.

He couldn't see much. It was still too far, but she was pretty and smiling while talking with Leo who just stood there with his arms crossed.

She then started to climb out of the window and his brother immediately offered his hand to help her.

She was wearing a long white sweater and a blanket as she sat down on the stairs of the fire escape.

Mikey watched as Leo got closer and the moment his brother touched Jay's hair, he knew he was definitely not supposed to be there.

He felt this weird feeling as his stomach as he was disrupting a tender moment for the two, and he felt upset with himself. As quietly as he could using all his ninja techniques he got to the opposite side of the roof and left.

* * *

 _ **Oh man, I wish my brothers were oversea sometimes.**_

Molly looked up from her calculus to read the message and smirked.

 _What are you getting the submarine?_

 _ **Yeah, like I want to go out, but I sort of can't kind of way.**_

 _Why not?_

 _ **I'm not allowed yet.**_

 _You go grounded? What did you do?_

 _ **Was loud during TV show time. Never mind. Anyway, my brothers are at it again, and I just want them to shut the hell up.**_

Molly chuckled.

 _Well, I can't say I know the feeling. Usually when teens or kids were at it in my house it meant me and Der which kind of doesn't go with your outside role in your brothers' fighting._

 _ **It sucks. I just wish they would knock it off.**_ _ **It's not even Leo as much as Raph. Leo just walks from the room, which I totally get. I would walk out too. Fighting with Raph is like adding oil to the flame. He gets his kicks out of it.**_

 _Gross! Then you should totally not interfere and let him cool out._

 _ **For sure. What are you up to anyway?**_

 _What are Leo and Raph fighting about anyway?_

 _ **A girl...but not in a romantic way. Leo got himself a girlfriend and Raph is just being a jealous asshole. Not that he likes here, he more like would want one too. I guess all of us would.**_

Molly bit her lip thinking about what he said.

 _Of course, people don't want to be lonely. They want someone to share their life with I guess._

 _ **Yup. I mean family is cool and friends are great...but..okay, don't like take this the wrong way, but I spied a bit on Leo tonight. It wasn't right. I know I shouldn't have, but I wanted to see this girl which got to monk brother. Anyway, as I was there I had this urge to leave. Seeing them there just standing and talking was...like invading their privacy. I was far away and yet I could feel something was there between them. Something which was not between anyone I know. Something...it just made it hard for me to watch without feeling guilty for being...I don't know.**_

Molly touched reached out to tuck at her beanie the way she always did when she was nervous, but she realize she didn't have it on.

 _Jealous._

 _ **I guess. I'm a terrible brother. Me and Raph, both.**_

 _I don't think you're terrible anything, Mi. I just think You're human. We want to be happy, and even if we love someone, it's hard to see them happy when we are not._

Her mind drifted to Kim and Matt, she knew their relationship was not real, but they could be free and together in public in a way she could never be. It made her feel jealous too.

 _Still, you love Leo so you want him to be happy and you would never hurt him...that's all that matters._

* * *

When Leo came home that day he came into his room with a smile on his face, 'Had fun tonight hiding behind the water tank?'

He made a grimace and looked away from his computer, 'Sure, it's always fun to hide with the spiders.'

Leo didn't say anything just stood in the doorway.

Mikey sighed, 'Okay, sorry, I was just curious, but I left and I won't come there again. I promise.'

Leo nodded before he walked inside, 'You know if you really want to meet her so bad, you can come with me next time.'

Mikey looked at the computer and the text from Mo.

'It wasn't about that. I mean sure I can meet her. If you think she's cool, well she has to be even if your taste of everything from music and movies and other things is sucky.'

Leo rolled his eyes.

'But…I guess I just wanted to see how it's like to actually be in contact with someone who isn't us or April or just…someone who like _likes_ you.'

Leo's face softened and he walked inside. He had to move a couple of things from his bed before he finally sat down on the very corner of it.

'When I first met her, it was when we were chasing those idiots with gas mask on. Raph left me hanging for a moment and I ended up crashing into this house. I guess I was super lucky because someone was having a party there so the music was so loud they probably didn't even hear a giant turtle crashing in.'

'Oh Leo, you party crasher you,' joked Mikey and sat down next to him.

Leo shook his head, 'Anyway, Jay was like the only person there or the only one who saw me because the moment I spotted her, I froze. I was in someone's house and someone saw me. I was sure she would scream any moment and I would like be chased by a bunch of people with fire like in Frankenstein. But Jay…Jay just rushed toward me. Literally helped me from the ground and pushed me into the kitchen. How she managed to do that to a sjdfn pound giant turtle is beyond me.'

'Sounds like she's pretty brave and quick thinker.'

Leo nodded, 'She locked the kitchen door and just watched me. I was anxious to get out, but with her there, I just felt like I couldn't move. She just asked if we met before.'

Mikey blinked confused, 'Seriously?'

'Yup, like you know cause we meet pretty blondes every day or something.'

His bother chuckled for a moment before he calmed down, 'So what she invited you out for a date or something?'

'No, she helped me out of the house. I haven't seen her for a while and then she appeared on the street after some creep was harassing her. I went to make sure she was okay, and she just opened the window and started to talk to me,' he looked at him, 'She said she could tell I was there and I believed her, but she also said that if I didn't came back the next night she would go follow me.'

'Dude that's blackmail.'

'Sure is. I don't think she would actually go through with it, but I was worried she would get in trouble if she went to look for me. Still, in the end all of that were just excuses. The real reason was always that I wanted to see her.'

'So you started hung out?' asked Mikey.

'Yes, we talked a lot and we're letting each other in _slowly_ ,' he spoke with a different tone, softer.

Mikey blinked, 'Letting in?'

Leo frowned before he rolled his eyes looking flushed, 'Not like that.'

He shoved him a bit and Mikey grinned.

'Letting in emotionally, into the darkness corners. Stuff you don't just tell people until you're sure they can handle hearing it and you are ready to share.'

'What stuff?' asked Mikey confused.

'Like how we were starving that one winter,' said Leo quietly and Mikey looked away as he remembered now. It was easy to forget about things like that when now they were doing okay. Come to think of it there were a lot of things, bad things to share if Leo wanted.

'Oh.'

'Yeah.'

'She's…she's worthy? I mean if she's good for sharing?'

Leo smiled a bit, 'I think so. I know she's like the light. Well, it's hard and pretty sappy to explain, but when I'm with her I feel like I have been living in the shadows all my life and she's just like this pure light which shows me things I couldn't see because of the shadows.'

Mikey's mind tried to process what Leo was telling him. It was…it was lonely if you let yourself think about it too much. They were four mutant boys and as far as they knew there were no other mutants female or male to well be with. It wasn't like they could find someone like regular Joes and date them. What Leo found…who Leo found was really amazing. He found someone who was looking at him and yet not seeing him as someone who was different but just as himself. He wondered if maybe all of them could find people like that.

He looked at him, 'Yeah, bro, totally sappy.'

Leo elbowed him lightly and Mikey chuckled, 'Hey, want to watch a movie or something?'

'Sure, what kind?'

Mikey pulled out one, 'I was thinking _Get Out._ It has good reviews and stuff.'

'Sure.'

'Go get Donnie and food I will get Raphie and drinks,' said Mikey excited and rushed out of the room.

'Yo Raph, movie?' asked Mikey as he opened the door to his brother's room. He was on the ground sitting crossed legged.

 _ **Whoa, was Raph meditating?**_

That was a new one. Raph was the last person he would expect to meditate without being forced by Master Splinter.

'You okay?'

Raph stood up nodding looking visibly more calm than he did before, 'Just nothing cheesy, alright?'

After the movie, which was pretty sick but in a good way, Donnie and him left their other brothers some room to talk. It looked like their hotheaded brother was ready to make amends like he always did.

* * *

She wasn't sure why exactly she did it, but she found herself sending the blonde a new article to her website. It was...it was hard to explain. Molly would like to think she was above the craving for her attention Jay could awoke in people, but maybe she was just a silly mortal like the rest.

Or maybe she just wondered if just like with her there wasn't more to Jay after all. The blonde was never intentionally bad or mean to her like Nicole and Jill. She never made fun of her she was just...ignorant?

 _Thank you_

Well, at least the blonde had manners.

Molly was almost ready to just log out when she got another message.

 _ **What are you up to tonight?**_

 _Playing Fortnite with some friends. You?_

 _ **Not sure yet. Probably go over some stuff and chill.**_

 _Disappointing. And I here I thought pretty girls were cool._

 _ **Happy to disappoint. Why did you send me the article?**_

 _You seemed pretty interested in it._

 _ **How did you ended up on the site?**_

 _Someone left it in a comment under a video on youtube. I wanted to check it out. What do you think?_

 _ **It's very intense...what do you think about them? The vigilantes I mean.**_

 _Not much, just that there someone who is doing the right thing for once._

 _ **Ditto**_

Molly stopped writing and actually started to think about it. Was she and Jay playing a getting to know each other game? Like sure maybe she wouldn't mind talking with someone about the NYV but to be friends with Jay.

They exchanged a couple of messages which confused Molly even more before Matt send her a message that he would stop by later. It was her nana's dance class again.

Still Jay's next text shook Molly completely.

 _ **Maybe we can talk about it more during lunch tomorrow. See ya.**_

Like actually _talk_ about during lunch? Where everyone could see them?

That felt weird. Like honestly weird.

Molly bit her lip before she quickly went off trying to think about it. She could just hang out with Jay McClaud? Was that even legal? They were from different worlds. Colossally different.

When Matt came she forgot about Jay for a couple of hours until it was once again time for him to kiss her goodbye and go.

He stroked her cheek, 'You seem kind of lost in thoughts. Thinking about Derek?'

She smiled at how worried he looked and shook her head before signing.

 _Just something going through my mind. Hey are you and Jay McClaud friends? Like I know her and Kim hang out sometimes but you know._

Matt shook his head chuckling, 'One does not become friends with Jay McClaud. She's like...she's like a fine painting. You can look from afar and admire but when you get too close it is impossible to understand what is going on, you know?'

Molly nodded. It was kind of like she felt about Jay too, but was there really all there was.

 _Isn't it sad though? Like people want to be close to her, but not really her friends?_

'Well, I guess it's the curse of the pretty girl. People always see you as something rather than someone. Isn't Kim little Ms. Perfect who could never disappoint? Or Nicole the girl who parties too much and ends up passed out on a couch. Or me the ever handsome asshole jock?'

Molly rolled her eyes before she kissed him.

 _Not a total asshole. Just like twelve percent._

'Why only twelve?' he asked not catching the Marvel reference.

 _Nothing,_ she smiled.

She watched him go feeling once again the sadness and emptiness inside. She went to her computer and check her messages.

 _ **You were right. All hail the great Mo. Get out was awesome.**_

Molly smiled a bit before she replied.

 _Told ya. What did you like best?_

She spent almost another hour discussing the movie and other familiar movies with Mi. Before she knew it the weird sadness was gone and she was okay again.

 _Hey, maybe we could watch something together next time._

There was a pause.

 _ **Together?**_

 _Well, not like together together, but I will watch it and you will watch it at the same time and we chat about it directly. What'cha thing? Too lame?_

 _ **No, Mo, that's sounds awesome. What movie are we going to watch? I heard Hereditary is pretty scary. Did you see it?** _

_Nope, but is sounds perfect, Mi. How about tomorrow?_

 ** _Excellent._**

She grinned at the responds. She finally brought herself to go to sleep after that already knowing she would be tired in the morning, but hell she was so excited. She was already thinking about other movies and tv shows they could even watch not even noticing a new text message from _At your own risk._

* * *

 **A.N: Thank you all for the support and love :) Oh, hope you like Molly. I am planning 2 more chapters with her before I move to Kim. Hope it does not suck to much or gets too complicated to understand. English is obvious not my 1st language.**

 **Thank you all**


	11. The Peculiar Girl 03

**The Peculiar Girl**

* * *

' _What is friend? A single soul dwelling in two bodies.' – Aristotle_

* * *

 _At your own risk: Are you angry with me? Please answer me._

Molly blinked confused at the message before she looked over at Jay McClaud (who was not one of her sitting buddies apparently) texting something as well.

 _AYOR: Molly, please..._

 _M: Why would I be angry? We're cool._

She looked up at Jay who was still smiling down at her phone. The girl was texting a lot without someone too. Molly wondered if she had a secret boyfriend as well. Maybe not secret since Jay just didn't talk about stuff, but you know, not public...

 _AYOR: I'm really sorry I couldn't come. Kim's parents wanted me to stay for dinner and I didn't have a good enough excuse._

Molly was still confused before she remembered. Oh right. They were supposed to hookup but he cancelled. It was okay, since she was more excited about watching a movie with Mi. Luckily it was his _day off_ (he wouldn't tell her from what) so they started sooner and watched Heritage and the new Slender man movie and then some AHS episodes she hasn't seen yet. It was actually a pretty good night. She didn't even get all that depressed about Matt ditching her.

 _M: It's fine. No worries._

 _AYOR: So you're not mad? I could come tonight?_

Molly heard Kim Sawyer's voice just then, 'Hi girls.'

She quickly hid her phone and looked at her just as Jay did, 'Hey, Kim.'

Molly nodded at her feeling the dreadful rock of guilt inside her chest again. Sometimes she wondered if her life would have been a happier one of Kim didn't exist, or just didn't fake date Matt. It was weird to know someone's secret like this.

To Molly's surprise Kim sat down next to her smiling at her before looking at Jay, 'Did you have time to check the new routine?'

Molly fixed her beanie a bit and looked down at her hands. So much for spending time with Jay. She looked over at Owen and Corina's table. Maybe she could still go sit with them. She offered them to sit with her and Jay, but Corina immediately shot it down even before Owen could speak like Jay was cursed or something. She didn't understand it but let it slide going with the blonde anyway.

'Yeah, it's great,' said the blonde and set her phone aside as well showing she was giving her attention.

'You really did a great job. You know couch could have done it, right?' asked Jay raising her brows a bit. Apparently Kim's overachieving personality wasn't weird just to Molly.

Kim shrugged her shoulders, 'I know, but she has a lot on her plate and dancing is something I enjoy. It's kind of lame and cliché, but it's fun. It's the thing which feel like it's fun not just hard work and studying,' admitted Kim suddenly and Molly blinked surprised by that.

The redhead looked at her looking startled all of the sudden, 'Not that I don't like studying and all the other things, but dancing just feels like...free and well fun and something which isn't done only for the benefit to be first or better. Dancing is like showing the pure chaos, but not the evil kind, but good. You can dance and be more yourself than you can while just walking or standing still. People dance to express themselves. Express feelings and emotions you simply don't have words in any language for. When you dance you don't think, you just feel like in love or faith. You just feel and you're...you're just you.'

Both Molly and Jay were left speechless at that just watching the girl as if for the first time or like she just told them grand secret to the whole universe.

Kim looked away shyly again, 'Also if we win the nationals this year it would really help up some of the girls with their scholarships.'

This caught Molly's attention even more, and it was actually something she could say something to.

She waved at Kim and signed before realize Kim might not have been so great at sign language.

 _Scholarships?_

Of course she was great at it.

Kim smiled, 'Oh, yeah, you see many universities have cheerleading in their school programs so for many it's a way to get a scholarships like a sport scholarship. You know Ava, the freshman who joined with you?' she asked Jay, who nodded.

'She's really good, but her well...she has a hard time with money. If we win the nations five girls in the squad get a scholarship. I really hope she could be one of them. She's very good.'

Molly was stunned speechless and not just because she was mute, but because _holy shit_ Kim was actually doing all this to help those girls get to good school. She was honestly to God surprised of this. She Kim came from a religious family and was the ultimate good girl, _perfect girl_ , apart from the fake dating, but this was really something.

Kim smiled at her shyly and Molly smiled back.

 _That's really nice of you Kim._

She shook her head, 'Oh, no, the program has been here for a while now. I'm just...I just think if you have a shot to do something you should. Like I said dancing is super fun.'

Molly looked over to Jay who also looked surprised. She briefly remembered how Kim was trying to get Jay into the squad. Kim went on and on about how talented Jay was so it was possible she wanted her so they would be the best and won the nationals, but for a completely different reason than Molly assumed. She almost wished she didn't know of this as she was now realized she felt even guiltier for some reason. Even if Kim and Matt were just pretending, Kim was honestly a good person.

 _Whoa_.

'Damn it, my head hurts,' said someone suddenly and they all looked up only to find Nicole Diaz dragging herself to their table until she sat down next to Jay and then lied her head on her knee.

'That's usually what happens when you drink on school day,' said Jay and pinched the other girl causing her to let out a pained noise, 'Knock it off, Jay!'

Molly watched the exchange shock before she looked over at Kim who shared a weirdout look with her. It was one thing for Jay McClaud to be sitting with Molly Jones, it was another thing for them to be also sitting with Kim Sawyer, but for all three to be sitting with Nicole Diaz? That was completely out of their school's world.

Molly looked casually around noticing people pointing their way and whispering, just when Nicole raised herself, 'You must be a terrible lover, not gentle at all.'

Jay raised her brows at her looking amused wearing a look Molly never saw on the blonde's face, 'Wasn't it you who said boys are only good to bone and go?'

'Hey, I never pinched the-,' Nicole caught herself mid sentence before she nodded, 'Fair enough, Jay.'

She just then looked around the table first at Kim who offered her an awkward wave and then at Molly who straight out frowned at her.

Nicole stared at her for a couple of moment before she pointed at her, 'Didn't we drink together this Saturday?'

Molly made a grimace like she was chuckling annoyed and shook her head. Like hell she would be a drinking buddy of Nicole Diaz. She was the nastiest and rudest girl she knew.

'Damn, what was I doing?' asked the latina looking around a bit.

'Drinking?' offered Kim slowly.

'More like _who_ were you doing?' joked Jay.

' _Jay_ ,' gasped Kim suddenly and all girls looked at her.

Molly shot her an amused look before she made hang gesture and Kim looked at her horrified which for some reason made Molly even more amused from the situation.

'What did she say?' asked Nicole suddenly causing them to look at her.

Kim looked almost red, 'I'm _not_ repeating that.'

'Was it dirty?' asked Nicole with a smile, 'I bet it was dirty. This chick gets my freaky.'

'Gross,' mumbled Jay before she laughed causing all of them to look surprised. Jay McClaud laughing was definitely a new thing, 'I know this means _fuck_.'

'Jay,' sighed Kim and Nicole immediately started to mimic it, 'Wait, what? This?'

Molly shook her head and did the gesture again.

'Can we not please?' begged Kim looking utterly desperate.

'Is it a dirty word if we sign it though?' asked Jay out loud and Kim shook a disbelieve look while Molly shook her head thinking it was not.

'Okay, how about this?' asked Nicole.

Molly shook her head before she signed something which Kim immediately voiced, 'That means coffee?'

Molly stood up suddenly and leaned over the table to Nicole. She easily caught her hand not even realizing she did and situated her fingers and hand until she got the sign.

'Ha,' said Nicole and smiled at her. Molly sat back down.

'I will totally use it on the principal now.'

'Nicole~'

Jay chuckled again and fixed her blonde curls a bit even if they really didn't need any fixing.

Nicole practised the gesture a couple of times before she asked, 'How do you sign _cock_?'

This time even Kim laughed and Molly would have too. Eventually they all went their ways, but for a couple of minutes that was fun. She was glad they didn't speak about boys and Kim didn't even mentioned Matt.

Her feeling of joy was short lived as Corina and Owen gave her shit for laughing with Nicole. Was is really considered laughing if she didn't let out any sound? As far as girl code went yes it was.

* * *

 _ **Jeez Mo, when are you going to get yourself a new microphone? This is ridiculous!**_

Wrote Mikey annoyed. While all of the other players had their mics on Mo was the only one who was still chatting. By now they were pretty familiar with each other. Bullet-Proof Joe was an adult sounding guy who sometimes had his wife's or baby cry noise in the background. TITANIUMMAN69 was a kid who's mom often told him something in languages none of them understood.

 _Mo: I will once my sugar daddy ponies up._

TITANIUMMAN69:WHAT'S A SUGAR DADDY?

 _Like your daddy only richer and likes to have sex with you._

TITANIUMMAN69:GROSS _!_

Bullet-Proof Joe:Damn it, don't tell him stuff like that. He is a kid.

 _Mo: Language!_

 _ **Mi: Language!**_

Mikey full on laughed at their usage of Captain America references. It was great spending time with Mo now than ever. They started to watch movies together and chat about them like they were actually watching them together. It was really fun. He learned a lot of new things about his new friend. Some of which he probably even wasn't all that interested on mentioning like that his _friend's_ visit always happened after school when his granny was in her dance class. It made Mikey wonder if Mo wasn't a closet gay. It would explain the secrecy like he told Mikey almost every name of his other friends but never the friend who comes for night visits. Now you might wonder why Mikey didn't think the friend was a girl, but he specially found a sentence where Mo used _he_ so he was pretty darn sure.

He wondered if he should ask him about the gay thing or let him know he would totally be okay with it. You know, cause it would feel good for Mo to know he had his support.

He waited for until he Mo was in school. He didn't get brave enough sooner and wrote. It sounded like a sensitive topic to begin with.

 _ **Listen, if you ever feel like you got something you want to talk about. Like you know ease the weight off your chest, I'm here, bro.**_

* * *

Since Molly understood that she was spending a bit too much time with Jay and neglectine her other friends she decided to spent few extra days only with them now.

It was fine for the most part, until it wasn't.

'Yeah, but it's not a real friendship,' said Corina suddenly, 'I mean you guys never met together.'

Molly stopped chewing and frowned a bit confused. They were standing by Corina's locker talking. Molly was telling the girl something funny about Mi since it felt like a safer ground than talking about what funny happened with Jay McClaud, Kim Sawyer and Nicole Diaz, but apparently talking about Mi also wasn't an option.

'You never saw him. It's not like you guys are…real? I guess.'

Molly full on frown.

 _Even online friendships can be real._

'Right,' said Corina annoyed and turned away from her. Molly eyes went wide. Corina knew that if she turned around it was like she was full on ignoring her which she hated.

Molly took her shoulder and turned her around to look at her.

 _What the hell is your problem?_

'My problem? What do you care? You have been all in your shit for the last couple of weeks and now what? You're friends with Diaz and McClaud? Since when? McClaud is the most stuckup bitch I know who thinks everyone is below her and Diaz? She's the ultimate bitch? Did you forget about how she and Jill put earphones into your locker? Or how she started the rumour about you hooking after school?'

Owen suddenly knocked at the locker next to Corina's, 'Cor, I think that's enough.'

Molly made Corina look at her again

 _What rumour?_

The girl looked a bit ashamed now.

 _What rumour?_

Corina pulled her back closer, 'There has been this rumour from a while back… some girls were told they did hooked up after school to get money. You were one of them. I heard Diaz talking about it once, so I…whatever. Molly, Diaz is a bitch so is Delgado and McClaud and all of those girls. You know this. They don't care about us. To them weird the freaks. The losers. They will always see us as this and we can go the same school with them and do group projects with them, but we can never be friends with them. Not really. They're just pulling a prank on you and I would hate to see you humiliated in front of the whole school like that!'

She closed her locker and started to walk away.

Molly looked at Owen who looked conflicted before he stepped closer, 'For the record, we never believed the rumours. You should…just don't go believing people who made fun of you instead of people who were your friends like forever.'

He then walked away leaving Molly alone with her thoughts not completely sure, what the hell had just happened?

* * *

Her Nana looked over at Molly as she was playing with her food for the last ten minutes, 'Are you okay, Molly?'

She looked up and nodded before she continued to dig into the pasta.

Her nana nodded, 'Good, cause I was worried. You know how I love it when people leave my food behind.'

Molly sighed and took a bite.

'Wau, thanks for that, I'm feeling the gratitude.'

Molly brushed her face.

 _Something happened in school. No, I don't want to talk about, but I can't stop thinking about it._

Her nana frowned, 'Something bad.'

Molly gave her a look.

'Okay, okay, I would pry, but a word of advice, if you're dealing with something and can't find a solution. You always need to take a step back and try to see it in a new way or light. Take a different approach of the problem if that fails take another one. No point to bang your head against the wall if it's not working,' said her nana and nodded at her pasta, 'Now, please continue to eat, dear.'

She nodded and started to once again play/eat with the food until she annoyed nana to the point she was told to just leave it.

Maybe her Nana was right if you can't change things just let be for a while and get a new approach.

Still waiting for it get a new approach didn't make her feel better. The girl with pink hair landed on her bed and decided to sleep for a while. She wasn't a nap person, but she just didn't have the energy or will to do anything. Not even edit NYV. Fuck Corina, Owen, Nicole, Jay and the rest.

She just covered herself and slept for a couple of hours when she finally woke up there was dark everywhere only fainted sounds coming from the living room. Nana was watching TV apparently.

Molly pulled her phone from under her pillow and was surprised to find several messages on her it.

 _ **Mi: Dude, where are you? This is so unlike. Just…let me know you're ok. I'm going out with my bros and I expect a responds before I get back or I will call 911 or the Avengers.**_

She grinned at that and texted him back.

 _To Mi: I'm fine. I just wasn't feeling so hot so I went to bed a bit. Even us sleepless monster do that from time to time._

She felt a bit touched that he wanted to make sure she was ok. He texted her during the day a couple of memes and stuff but she was too depressed to answer at the moment.

She went to the next message.

Jay M.: Hey, are you okay? You looked pretty down in Bio.

 _To Jay: Yeah, just…some stuff happened. Listen, what's your intake on rumours?_

Amanda: OWEN JUST TEXTED ME! FUCK CORINA! She's just pissed because Jill used to make fun of her in middle school and told everyone when she got cramps in the gym. She had no right to be a bitch to you! Stupid mono, I wish I was there.

 _To Amanda: Thanks A. I knew I could count on you. Did you know about the rumour? The one Corina was talking about?_

A: Yeah, but I didn't buy it. I mean it was several girls not just you. I was also included as the whorish chicks of Kennedy High. Yes, we had a name. There were several including Nicole, Jill and Jay McClaud.

 _To Amanda: Then it makes zero sense. Why would people spread that? Why would they include girls like Jay and Nicole? Why would Nicole spread it if she was one of them?_

A: Everything in that school makes zero sense. Jocks are like royalty and girls get slutshamed like everywhere in the world of course, and I never heard Nicole spread the rumour. I heard her bitching about it being BS and accusing some cheerleader of making the list.

Jay: What rumours?

Corina: I'm sorry about what I said. It was bitchy and totally not us. Can you forgive me?

AYOR: Hey, why was Kim sitting with you at lunch? I hope…I hope you didn't talk about me, did you?

 _To Jay: Just rumours in general._

Jay: I almost never hear any rumours. Kind of hard to hear them if you're a ice queen who ignores everyone.

Molly stopped writing for a while.

 _You didn't ignore me._

Despite what Corina said about her, Jay noticed she was upset and wrote her to checkup on her too. How could she be a bitch like Corina thought if she did that? Why would she continue to text her if she was a stone cold bitch?

Owen: I'm sorry about today. Corina was just having her moment. I'm sorry for not standing up for you.

 _To Owen: It's okay, O. I got over it. It's not the first time Corina pulled a tantrum before a match or something._

 _To Jay: Did you hear something about you and I? Something about us hooking up?_

 _Jay: What? Like together?_

 _AYOR: Okay, seriously this isn't funny. I know you're online, please answer me!_

Molly rolled her eyes annoyed.

 _To AYOR: No, I didn't talk about you! We just hung out._

 _To Jay: This is what Amanda send me. Yeah, but I didn't buy it. I mean it was several girls not just you. I was also included as the whorish chicks of Kennedy High. Yes, we had a name. There were several including Nicole, Jill and Jay McClaud._

 _AYOR: What could you two possibility have to say?_

 _Jay: What the fuck? Jesus, some people should fucking mind their own business and no I am not hooking up. Assholes!_

 _To Jay: Agree! And I didn't think you were I just wondered if you knew about this or who was spreading it. Someone told me it was Nicole today, but now I'm not so sure._

 _Kim S.: Hi Molly, sorry to bother you, but I was wondering if we could talk about something._

 _AYOR: MOLLY?!_

 _To AYOR: Maybe I'll find out what could we be possibly talking about since she's texting me right now._

 _To Owen: Well, it was pretty shitty thing you did, but like I said I got over it._

 _To Kim: Hi._

 _Owen: I will never stop being sorry. I just... Nicole is such a bitch to me. She once said I'm not gay enough to find someone...like WTF? She's such a bitch!_

 _AYOR: WHAT? DON'T ANSWER HER!_

 _Kim: Listen, I know this may sound strange, but I was thinking if you would be interested in an extracurricular activity? It would look really good on your college application. Anyway, Mrs. Graham asked me if I know someone who would be interested in writing for the school magazine since they got one spot still open. I heard your essay from English last week and it was really great and good written. You don't have to decide or even say yes. My dad always tells me I'm too pushy, but if it is something you would be interested in maybe let me know?_

 _AYOR: WHAT? DON'T ANSWER HER! MOLLY! WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!_

 _To AYOR: Just_ fucking _calm down. She's just asking me about joining the school magazine. You retard!_

 _To Owen: You're forgive, but you broke my trust so I would do my best for redeemed it if I were you._

 _Jay: Don't you ever wish people wouldn't just stop putting you in a box? Like bitch, weirdo, prom queen, asshole? Everyone can be all those things and more why do we just have to pick one and stick with it?_

 _AYOR: Don't answer her! She's close with Mrs. Graham. You would be spending time together!_

 _To Jay: All the time. Hello, this isn't communism! We should be free to chose who we are and express ourselves. What Kim said the other day about being free to feel...that's what we should be like. Sometimes you are nice, but sometimes you want to be an asshole or be alone or be the goodie goodie it shouldn't cause people to look down on you or hate you..._

 _To Corina: Apology accepted but I want your home baked muffins as apology gift._

 _AYOR: What are you doing? Answer me! MOLLY!_

 _Corina: Consider it done!_

 _To AYOR: Just leave me alone! I'm tired of your whining! I'm not talking to her about you ever! Why are you so paranoid? I didn't start talking to her. I didn't even invite her to sit with us. I'm not doing anything. And talking with her? Why shouldn't I?_

 _To Kim: Count me in! When do I start?_

 _AYOR: Molly! You can't talk with her! I forbid you!_

 _Jay: I have to go. I will talk to you later. Get some rest and if you felt shitty because of the rumours forget them. It doesn't matter what people think of you, but what you think of yourself._

 _Kim: I'm so glad to hear it. I am sure you will like it. You're perfect for it. Would it be ok to meet tomorrow with Mrs. Graham and discuss it all?_

Molly reread Jay's words.

 _What do I think about myself?_

 _To Kim: Can't wait._

* * *

 _What do I think about myself?_

That was the only thing on Molly's mind as she reread Mi text from earlier. What did she think about herself? She was a girl who was in a secret relationship with a guy who had a fake boyfriend. She was a girl who secretly the writer and creator of Vigilantes of NY. She was the girl who still didn't tell her online friend, Mi, that she was girl or that she was mute.

 _ **Listen, if you ever feel like you got something you want to talk about. Like you know ease the weight off your chest, I'm here, bro.**_

Molly knew Mi was a good guy...she just...she just knew. It was like she could picture him. Not like how he looked but his heart. If it was as in Disney movies then his heart was big and nice and glowing with good deeds. He cared deeply for his brothers. She could tell by the way he spoke about them. He was upset with himself from being jealous about one of them having a girlfriend. He cared for his dad who he often mentioned and he sort of cared for her? Well, not like care _care_ but he would often write her things like _drive safe_ or _get some rest_ or _don't get so upset_ whenever she was being upset about something in movies. So yeah, Molly was positive Mi was a good guy in heart.

So maybe it was because she had so many secrets, but with a deep breath she decided to do it. She decided to have one less secret at least from him at least.

She had it sort of as a finale test. If he freaked out or hesitated she would know for sure if he was...well a good guy or not and ease her guilty soul with one less secret.

She carefully wrote the words.

 _There's something I need to tell you._

 _ **Oh man, Raph said you're probably some old dude name Trevor who wanted to steal my innocence.**_

She chuckled. No sound came out but still. It was funny.

 _You forgot a paedophile._

 _ **Totally. Do you want to steal my innocence?**_

 _Dude, I'm mute._

 _ **Then turn on the speaker and buy the damn mic.**_

 _No, Mi, I'm seriously mute. Like I have a disability to speak, mute._

 _ **...**_

He was writing something then deleted it and started again and that deleted that as well.

 _ **Oh.**_

Oh? Not what Molly was expecting.

She clapped her fingers against her keyboard before she went to touch her beanie which wasn't there again. She wanted more than _oh_. She needed more than _oh_.

 _Did I freak you out?_

 _ **No, sorry...I don't know what to say...I didn't expect this. Like not that it's something wrong with you being mute or anything, just that I wouldn't imagine...**_

 _Since I 'talk' so much?_

 _ **Sorry Mo. That was mean of me.**_

 _It's cool, dude. I didn't even know what to expect at least you didn't stop writing me._

 _ **No, Mo, man, I would never apart from my brothers your my best friend which is kind of lame since I never saw you.**_

 _Totally lame. You're social life is pitiful, bro._

 _ **Says the guy who plays Fortnite all day and watches all the new Netflix shows the moment they come out?**_

 _You do the same, asshole._

They bricked back and forth for a while before she wrote.

 _Still, thanks for being so cool with this. People...a lot of people freaked out on me when they found out. They started to act all weird and well...a lot of them just stopped talking to me. I guess when you don't understand something it's easier to just leave than to try and work it out._

 _ **Yeah, I know what you mean, bro. More than you can possibly imagine.**_

There was another pause.

 _ **Hey, do you know sign language?**_

Molly blinked and smiled.

 _Yeah, sure, want me to teach you?_

 _ **Yeah, I actually already started to learn, but I don't think I'm good enough yet.**_

 _Why did you start?_

 _ **I meet this girl. Helped her out a bit and she signed a thank you. I was kind of into it since even if I didn't know what it meant. I just thought she was freaked out and had a nervous habit of touching her chin.**_

Molly smiled at thought.

 _Nah, it was a thank you alright if she touched her chin. How did you help her out?_

 _ **Someone tried to take her bag. My brothers and I assisted her a bit.**_

Molly blinked at the message.

 _Someone tried to steal her bag? And you guys helped? Sounds dangerous._

 _ **It's nothing. It was just one guy. Dude, Mo, he had the funny looking moustache. You know he totally reminded me Hercule Poirot I swear.**_ He added some extra smile faces, but Molly froze.

A man with a moustache like Hercule Poirot tried to steal _her_ bag a couple of months back, and she was rescued by...

 _Oh._

She turned around to look at her wall full of newspapers and papers about the vigilantes of New York before she turned back to the screen. She shared a lot with her video game friend, Mi, but her obsession with the vigilantes was not one of them, not to mention how would he know which of the story from her site was hers? She was sure no one knew.

 _ **You ok?**_

Molly put her hands on the keyboard.

 _Sorry, my nana came to the room. I'm cool. So what will you be up to tonight? Some party or something?_

She felt her hands started to sweat. Could it really be that...that...

 _ **Not much, my brothers and I go out every night just walk around the city a bit of fun. Nothing too exciting.**_ He added a winky emoji.

Molly bit her lip.

 _You go out a lot?_

 _ **Every night. It's a routine.**_

She nodded to herself.

 _Hey, quick question...what's your favourite colour?_

 _ **Okay, don't be weird out cause it's not manly or something, but orange.**_

* * *

Mi logged out after a while saying he and his brothers were going out. She spent half of the night behind her computer searching for some news about the turtles and other half walking around her room trying to put it together.

It could be coincidence or a prank. She was pranked before. It was someone messing with her. Someone who knew she was the girl who got saved by the vigilantes, someone who knew she was the author of Vigilantes of New York. Someone who wanted to make her look like an idiot.

But the color.

She walked to her wall where she had the best looking image of the four turtle warriors. It was dark and not that clear but people could make up shelves as well as some weapons like a katana and stick. There were four of them and the one of the left had an orange bandana over his eyes because the back of it was coming out to the light.

 _Damn it, I need to know!_

She sat down on her bed.

Could Mi really be a ninja warrior turtle?

She quickly rushed back to her computer and opened their chat window. She went back to the first messages. It took her a good of twenty minutes to scroll up to the first one. There were so many of them.

They had been chatting for almost two months now. She reread all 138 053 messages piecing together everything he told her about him. Everything he said filled out perfectly the profile of the vigilantes. He said he had three brothers and lived with his dad, who trained him _a bit_ (yeah, right) in ninjutsu. By the style the turtles fought some of the people who followed her site also agreed that they had to be trained in this particular martial art. Under one of the stories some people started to argue about their age. One woman claimed she heard them talk and was sure they couldn't be older than twenty although people kept on insisting that because of how good fighters they were they had to be at least in their late twenties. Mi was sixteen it was clear they could have been teens as well. He claimed they often went out and sometimes revealed stories of _helping_ _out_ like saving her from the mugger as well as saving a kid from getting hit by a car which was why his leg hurt. He managed to fullfill his end of the deal by claiming the old factory building and hanging their a handmade poster of South Park Stan. She thought he was just good at parkouring, but the building was so high. He had to jump that high.

Molly closed her eyes. She remembered just how tall he was. They all were, but her eyes were at him.

' _Here you go, babe.'_

She opened her eyes. It had to be him. Deep down...she was sure of it.

She bit her nails for a couple of minutes before she wrote to him.

 _Hey, write me when you get back, okay?_

 _...stay safe_

She waited all night. It was close to four in the morning. It was December so it was extremely cold outside. How cold can a turtle get before it becomes unbearable? She knew some real turtles slept more during the winter. She was up for a very long time and now that she knew or thought she knew Mi was actually her giant turtle vigilante she redid her research.

 _ **Hey, shouldn't you be sleeping?**_

She checked the watch.

3:52

 _I just wanted to know what time do you and your brothers come home on a school night._

 _ **Yeah, we don't go to school much.**_

 _Why not?_

 _ **We're homeschool. Less stress and more fun that way.**_

 _Yeah, plus, you don't have to be put into a lab as an experiment that way_ , she thought and froze. What if they were an experiment? She swallowed hard. What if they were tortured and cut into and...

She felt sick all of the sudden. She had some many question, but how? How could she just ask?

 _Don't you miss it? Not going to school. Maybe we would have gone to the same one?_

 _ **Can't imagine ever going to any school (smiley face). This is better. I can stay up all night and sleep during the day and play games. I don't think I would like school too much. I'm not that smart. Not like my bro Donnie. That guy is a genius.**_

He sent her a gif with Albert Einstein from South Park. She laughed a bit at it before she calmed down again.

Without knowing it he told a person who was writing about him key information.

 _Leo, Raph, Donnie and their father..._  
He told her things which she could never use. He didn't know he revealed his secret life to someone who knew who he really was. He would surely never do so if he knew.

She felt like a fraud. She felt like she somehow tricked him or was planning a trap on him. She tapped the keyboard for a moment before she wrote down.

 _Mo stands for Molly. Just so you know._

...

She waited patiently for him to say something, but the dots just remained there. He wrote nothing. She had to go to school. She tried to play to sick card, but her nana told her to go almost shoving her out of the door. Crazy feminist.

She was nervous. Why wasn't he answering? Is he upset? Or did he realize that she was the girl from the alley and thought she tricked him somehow? Well, she did a bit. She knew who he was. He didn't, but still...could it be he figured it out too? She told him she was mute and knew sign language. Maybe...maybe he realized it was her and caught on to her lies?

Matt was trying to get her into eye contact the whole class while texting her, but she ignored all the messages too stressed to deal with him right now.

She was ending her first period when she got a message.

 _ **Sorry, I slept on the laptop. DUDE, YOU'RE A GIRL? SERIOUSLY? PROOF! I DEMAND PROOF!**_

She pressed the phone against her forehead and grabbed her bag. She quickly rushed out of the room knocking into Jill and Nicole.

'Jesus, watch it, peculiar!' snapped the latina with blonde while Nicole watched her confused. Right now the whole rumour thing seemed so far away not important as ever.

She didn't waste time with them and ran to the bathroom where she locked herself up.

 _No way. You told me stuff about you so I thought it would be fair to say something back._

 _ **It's cool, Mo. We're friends...should I call you Molly now?**_

 _Mo's good. I like it. No one calls me that._

 _ **Sweet. So I got a cool nickname for you. What about me? Do you want to know my real name?**_

She wanted to type no. Don't tell me anything more which could be used against you, but how could she without admitting that she knew.

'Gosh, did you see that weirdo. I swear she's getting psycho every minute,' she suddenly heard as the bathroom door opened.

She raised her legs and hugged them so no one would see them.

'They should never allow her to visit this school. There are _real_ kids here.'

She didn't recognize the voice...maybe one of the bitches from the cheerleaders.

She returned to her texts.

 _Sure, but I bet it sucks._

 _ **As much as yours, Mo?**_

She smiled not even listening to the gossips the two were sharing outside of the cabin.

 _ **It's Michelangelo. Mikey for short, and Mi by girls with weird music taste.**_

 _Hey, the only one with weird music taste is you._

He sent her a gif with Lionel Richie, and she started to laugh. Good thing no sound came out. She didn't even notice when the girls outside left, but she knew by the watch she had to go to her next class.

 _I gotta go. Some of us don't have cool dads who homeschool them._

 _ **Yeah, not everyone can have such an awesome life. Hey, Mo, write me when you're finished in school.**_

 _Will do, Mi._

She got out of the restroom feeling a bit lighter. Mi is for Michelangelo, Mikey.

'What's that smile for?' asked Owen with a confused smile as well.

Molly bit her lip to push the smile she didn't know she had away.

'What new love interest?'

 _No_

She quickly signed. It wasn't like that it was like...it was like totally full on _platonically crushing on your childhood hero_ kind of thing except she wasn't a child.

'Yeah, that's why you're blushing,' said her friend before hugging her around the shoulders.

She grinned unable to hold it inside, but it was not because she was _into_ Mikey. No way, it was because he was more of good guy than she thought. It was because he saved her life and...and accepted that she was mute and a girl and well and...she was not crushing.

Her phone beeped with another text message from _At your own risk._

* * *

Mikey woke up some time during the lunch. Mo still hasn't texted him so she must have been in school.

 _She_

It was so bizarre. He was sure Mo was a dude. He hoped he wasn't a creepy old dude Trevor, but he was sure he was a guy. Teenage kid with weird music taste and mad Fortnite skills and loved to watch movies with him in his spear time. How could a girl like Xbox games, South Park, weird Japanese commercials and Fail compilations videos? It was bizarre. Girls don't like stuff like that. He was sure Mo was a guy. Maybe... maybe he was pulling his leg. Maybe he was a pedo who was trying to lure him by claiming he was a girl? But why would he tell him he was mute? They chatted for months and he didn't need any explaining. Sure he made fun and complained about the whole mic thing for days now, but it wasn't like he actually needed him well her to explain that part.

He went to the kitchen. It was Raph's turn to cook and he made penne pasta. He was super weird sometimes. Lately he has been in the freakish mood since he found out about Leo's girlfriend.

'Smells good.'

'It should since I was making it since morning. Donnie, you need to have a look at the stove, man,' said his brother handing him the plate.

He took it with excitement ready to eat.

Donnie mumbled something like, 'Okay, I will fix it after lunch.'

He had been working nonstop on something in his workshop for days now. Mikey wondered if it what would be his new creation.

They all sat behind the table. Master was silently reading newspapers while Donnie was explaining to Leo his new invention. His older brother looked like he was both confused and interested which was kind of who Leo always looked when Donnie was explaining something to him. He would never tell him to shut up about it. He was a good older brother.

Raph brought the food and they all started to put it on the plates.

'Well, anything interesting happened last night?' asked their Master as he sat the newspaper aside and smiled at them calmly.

'A robbery and car chase near Spanish Harlem. It was fun,' said Raph with a smirk. It was the first time he smiled that day. He was acting weird. Weirder than usual. He was acting almost as weird as Leo expect Leo was stressed Raph was angry, stressed and then happy. What he was in love too? That would be hilarious.

Maybe he should talk to him or ask him to pull his head out of his ass.

Mikey took his mug, 'Oh, guess what. Mo is a chick.'

It took a moment for the others to catch up. Leo was the first one to speak, 'Your video game friend is a girl?'

'Yup.'

'Doubt that,' mumbled Raph and continued to eat.

'It's true. She told me last night,' argued Mikey.

'You know she could be lying, right?' asked Leo carefully probably not wanting to hurt Mikey's feelings or offend him.

'Yeah, cause Trevor _loves_ lying,' teased Raph. Maybe there wasn't anything wrong with him after all.

'Dude, I'm telling you, her name is Molly and she's a girl.'

'Whatever.'

'I can prove it,' said Mikey finally and Raph gave him a look, 'How?'

'Well, I can't but Donnie can if he traces her IP address?' asked Mikey hesitantly.

Leo gave him an _older brother_ look which matched Master Splinter's _father_ look, 'My son, I do not believe it would be wise to make sure a violation of Ms. Molly's privacy. If she wanted for you to know who she really was he would have send you a picture.'

'Or download it off the web,' cut in Raph and Mikey was about to say something when Donnie cut in, 'Actually. She's not lying. She's a girl. A teenage girl.'

The whole table went silent before Leo let out an annoyed sigh, 'Donnie, _how_ do you know that?'

'What? Mikey was writing stuff about himself to a stranger I just wanted to make sure it's not someone from the Purple Dragons or Shredder or someone from our other long list of enemies. It was the most ration thing to do.'

Raph shook his head, 'Whatever, it's not like you can show yourself to her.'

'Who cares? I was right and she wasn't lying, and Donnie, stop acting like a stalker. What if she found out my brother was stalking her?' asked Mikey upset.

The other turtle quickly turned picked, 'I wasn't...I didn't stalk anyone as soon as I found out she was a real teen girl I deleted the Ispy from her computer. I didn't like browse her files and stuff. Well, not apart from checking if she was just an ordinary girl.'

'You should get a medal for that,' said Raph looking annoyed.

'Enough,' said Master Splinter breaking their bricking, 'My sons. Let's eat in peace. Donatello, Michelangelo, I would like to have a word with you after lunch.'

Mikey sighed and shot Donnie a look before he dug into his food. He lost his appetite. Who was he kidding of course he didn't. He went at it instantly.

Leo groaned, 'Mikey, manners. You're not a pig.'

'Mikey's worse,' said Raph looking like he didn't want to continue eating. After lunch Leo and Raph conveniently left leaving Donnie and him with their Master.

He sat them down.

'Donatello, I do not have to explain to you what you did was truly not right and inappropriate for the young girl even if it was to protect our secret.'

Donnie looked like he was about to argue, but in the end just nodded, 'Yes, Master, but I didn't do it for anything like _that_. I just wanted to be sure who she was. I didn't even tell Mikey who she was just so I wouldn't betray privacy. The moment I knew she was really just a girl. I swear, Mikey, I got rid out of her computer and didn't go there again. I didn't even read what you wrote her.'

Mikey nodded, 'Good.'

'Michelangelo, did you wrote her anything about us? Who we are?'

'Of course not, Master. I wouldn't do that.'

'But you did write her something about your life? Details?'

Mikey felt his hand sweating, 'Just some stuff...nothing which would tell her we're not humans or where we are. I swear. '

'You must be careful, my son. Donatello, even if method wasn't something I would encourage, was right. You never know who are your real friends. I do not want to isolate you from the world, but be careful who you let into your world, mind and soul...not everyone is a friend and has good intentions,' said their Master and nodded for them that they could leave.

They walked away together and Mikey couldn't help but ask, 'How does she look?'

Donnie stopped in track and looked at him, 'Like physically?'

'Yeah...she likes boys stuff so is she a tomboy?' asked the turtle.

'She has pink hair,' said Donnie, 'I saw an online photo. Her cam is ductaped which is a very smart thing to do.'

Mikey shot him a look, 'You said you didn't spy further.'

'I didn't. I check the IP address of the computer then the address of the residence and then the people who lived there. Apart from a fifty seven year old woman she is the only other person who lives there.'

'Is she cute?' asked Mikey hoping he didn't sound too hopeful or weird. It didn't matter how she looked really. He was a giant turtle plus Mo was cool. Who cared about looks and gender if you liked pizza and Fortnite?

'Actually, I think she looks a bit weird...like with the hair, but...it's kind of like interesting weird? But who am I to judge?' he pointed at his face and made a grimace.

Mikey chuckled, 'I really think she's cool and my friend.'

Donnie looked strange for a moment, 'But you're not planning to tell her right?'

Mikey shook his head, 'No, of course not.' Whenever he made an online friend he promised himself no matter how involved he got he would never reveal himself. It wasn't a problem so far since most of the people weren't close to him. They chatted a bit about stuff, but it was never long hours talk about why Big Bang Theory is underrated. Or people should be more careful when walking anywhere while they are filmed shit in haunted houses particularly, or watching movies at the same time while chatting about it.

Yet, he was never close with anyone as close as he was with Mo, but still. They had their reasons for staying secret. Mo was cool sure, but he was a giant turtle living in the sewer after all.

'I would never betray our secret, Donnie. Don't worry,' he nodded at him and smiled. Funny, he actually believed it.

'Besides, as a superhero, I need a girlfriend who doesn't know about my hidden identity.'

'Oh Jesus, Mikey. Not with the superhero stuff again, please.'

He laughed and went to his room.

No message yet.

He sat down on his bed. All the things which happened got stuck in his head. Mo was girl, but that didn't really matter. What mattered was that he could never be really honest with her. He couldn't tell her who he was or about his brothers or anyone else. He had to lie to her always. Hide the truth. He did it for the right reason, but it was still lying.

He lied down on the bed, 'Is this how Clark Kent felt?'

* * *

 **A.N: Hey everyone! New Chapter as promised. I should have the next one before Wednesday...I hope. It will be the last chapter about Molly and Mikey and then I will move to Kim and Donnie. Hope you like it so far. Thank you for the support and love and all the nice things.**


	12. The Peculiar Girl 04

**The Peculiar Girl**

* * *

 _One of the hardest lessons in life is letting go. Whether it's guilt, anger, love, loss, or betrayal. Change is never easy. We fight to hold on, and we fight to let go. – Mareez Reyes_

* * *

Molly walked into the bathroom, she felt her phone vibrate all class, and she hoped it was from Mikey. Mikey who was ninja turtle protecting NY. Holly shit! She knew him! She actually knew one of them for months now! She still had a hard time believing it, but every time they spoke about something and he told her a bit about himself it was obvious he had to be.

She rushed into the bathroom only to find Jay along with Nicole who was doing her make up. Molly froze as she spotted the now healing shiner on Nicole's face she didn't notice yesterday or the days before. Damn that makeup was good.

She looked at Jay with a question in her eyes, but the blonde just shrugged her shoulder as if it was nothing. Nicole didn't even look at her just mumbled, 'Door.'

She continued to work as if it was nothing. Molly closed the door properly and went to look at her forgetting about her phone or Mikey for a moment.

She pointed at her face and then signed _what happened?_

Jay looked at Nicole who shrugged her shoulders as well.

'I'm done with David that what's happened.'

Molly's eyes widened, but Nicole shook her head, 'It wasn't him, but he left me in a alley with some punks cause he's a,' she stopped applying makeup for a moment and signed _fuck,_ ' _fucking_ pussy.'

Molly smirked a bit nodding.

She signed the words _fuck_ and _pussy_ and Nicole grinned at her satisfied before she continued.

She went inside the stall and closed the door. There was a message from Mi, but only one to Molly's disapoiment, the others were from Matt.

Mostly apologizes for being upset yesterday.

 _I just don't want things to get even more complicated than they already are._

Ha. Funny.

Molly didn't feel like her secret love affair was all complicated or important right now. She found out her online friend Mi, was Michelangelo, Mikey a giant ninja turtle vigilante who was protecting the City of New York with his three brothers. Who cared about a love affair when you had something so hug to keep a secret? Her heart was racing every time he wrote he knowing _holy fuck it's him._

She was soooo tempted to tell him she knew who he was. Tempted to just... damn to show him that she knew or that she was the girl from the alley or just...damn something!

She was desperate for more of him, his family, his life.

 _Who are you and why do you protect the city?_

 _To Matt: It's okay, but I will join the magazine. I already met with Mrs. Graham and I think it will be good for me. I don't have to be BFF with Kim, but I won't act guilty around her or ignore her. We're in love. It's you two who's fake dating. I'm not surrendering my life to that._

She felt oddly lighter about her decision just then. The magazine sounded like a great opportunity and well Molly loved to write and talk about her opinions. Why not give it a go?

When she walked outside Nicole was all done looking like a latino goddess and Molly actually felt impressed. She didn't use much makeup only the eyes occasionally, but Nicole was seriously good with hers.

Jay nodded at her, 'You coming to lunch today?'

Molly shook her head. Jay was trying, but she wasn't nearly as good in sign language as Kim.

 _I will eat with some other friends today. Okay?_

It took Jay a couple of minutes before she asked, 'Owen and Corina and the rest, yes?'

Molly nodded and Jay smiled a bit, 'No problem. What about you _American's next top model_? Will you stick with me for lunch?'

'I will try if I'm not too preoccupied with my fans,' she winked at her and Jay genuinely smiled at her. It was clear the blonde and latina had a lot of history together to share this kind of friendship. She wondered what happened that they grew apart and what caused them to find their way back to each other. She was quite a friendly friend with Jay now, but it definitely wasn't besties material to ask personal stuff just yet.

She went to cafeteria and sat down Corina was the only one there so far.

'Oh, so are you ditching us today for McClaud?' asked the girl nodding her head at the blonde cheerleader who walked through the door just then with Nicole looking like they owned the place.

Molly blinked and tried to look at them. They were just walking and talking to each other. They weren't doing anything. They weren't demanding attention in anyway, they were just walking. It made her wonder if people only saw them as _those_ girls because of the power they were the ones giving them. Like if they treat them normal or ignore them nothing would change for them. Neither of the girls looked up to see if people were watching them.

Molly shook her head. Spending time with Jay was fine, but spending time with Nicole not so much plus she had a feeling it would still be deep inside Corina's throat even if she apologized. She still wasn't sure about the whole rumour thing though. Why would Nicole spread a rumour about herself? Or Jay if they were friends?

Owen came later and Amanda was still at home sick. They all stopped paying attention to Jay or Nicole and just talked about stuff like always. They mentioned NYV and Molly felt a bit tense as she once again thought about Mikey, he texted her he was going to workout a bit with his brothers and hasn't responded since. Mi, Mikey, Michelangelo, the giant ninja turtle defending the city. Her hero...

It was harder than ever not to say anything, not because she wanted to expose him, but because she was totally fangirling about him and his brothers now. She knew him. She actually genuinely knew him. She knew he was great at games, wonderful in Fortnite, had the most brilliant sense of humour (puns and dad jokes all the way). She knew he kicked ass every night in the streets of NY and damn he was so honest and good and just _whoa_.

'What are you smiling at dork?' asked Owen trying to steal her muffin (apology muffin from Corina) before she block his hand with her own. She didn't even notice she was smiling. She knew she was a little bit crushing on the NYV since she first started to write and then saw then, but now...okay now she was crushing a _little_ bit more, than before, but just like a tiny bit more. It was like having a real life hero who you could admire and write about and know him and was friends with him.

 _Just thinking about something funny which happened with my online friends the other day._

'Ah, still in love with the mystery guy?' asked Owen with a wink, and Molly rolled her eyes.

 _Not love, just, you know, admiration._

'So why are you blushing?' asked Corina and Molly shook her head quickly. She was not blushing. She was just...whatever. _Not_ blushing.

'Right of course,' said Corina and smirked, 'Anyway, I'm having another match tonight. Amanda is still out, so you guys are coming, right?'

Molly quickly shook her head.

 _Can't. I have to stay in work late today. It's Medieval night._

Corina frowned, 'Oh, you didn't mentioned that before.'

Owen gave her a strange look.

Molly shrugged her shoulders.

 _I forgot? I don't even have a costume yet._

Corina looked at Owen who started to shake his head like he was telling her not to do something.

Molly was confused. What now?

 _What?_

Corina looked at her, 'Are you ditching us for McClaud?'

Molly blinked.

 _What? No._

'Look, if you are? Not cool, but at least have the decency to tell us,' said Corina and brought up her phone ignoring Molly now.

She quickly signed.

 _I'm not ditching you for anyone, okay? I really forgot until yesterday? What's the big deal?_

Owen nudged Corina who shot him an annoyed look and Molly upset repeated herself.

Corina didn't look convinced, 'Whatever.'

Molly got offended now. So much for calling it truce. Why the hell should she apologize herself to them? She was making a new friend, but it wasn't like she was ditching them? Why did Corina had to be so judgemental about it. Molly had hard time in middle school too. She had scars to prove it, but she still was willing to be friends with Jay.

She grabbed her backpack and zipped it leaving the muffins behind.

She quickly signed Corina _whatever_ and left without those stupid muffins. She had half the mind to walk straight to Jay's table, but decided to walk away completely.

 _To Mi: Did you ever fall out with any of your old friends? Like you used to be friends and then weren't?_

Molly felt someone tapped her shoulder when she was outside of the cafeteria. She was surprised. She thought everyone was at lunch.

'Hey, Mrs. Graham was so excited about your essays. Good idea to bring them too,' said Kim Sawyer smiling at Molly who smiled back at her before she signed _thank you_.

'No problem. I think you have a lot to say and the magazine seems like a good idea even if it's only a school magazine.'

Molly nodded. She still felt weird about spending time with Kim because of Matt.

Kim didn't leave, and since it was becoming awkward Molly signed at her.

 _Got any plans for weekend?_

'Oh, well, church on Sunday of course. My little sister is having her first ballet recital so we will definitely stop there. Some studying and maybe spending some time with Matt. You?'

 _I will probably go to the kid's centre. We have a Medieval sleepover for the kids. I still don't have a costume though._

Kim's eyes almost lightened, 'A medieval princess? I can lend you mine. It's nice and green, and it would go so nicely with your skin tone. When do you need it?'

Molly's eyes widened.

 _No, sorry, thank you, but you don't have to. Thanks Kim._

'Really it's no trouble. I can drive you to my house and then home. I had to dress a couple of years ago in a Church play. It look great on you, I promise. I was right about the magazine and Jay joining the squad, wasn't I?' asked Kim with a knowing smile, and it was really hard to let her down. But she just got pissed and Owen and Corina thinking she was ditching them for Jay going with Kim would have been like admitting they were right and it would look very bad.

She was about to again decline when someone stepped toward them.

'Hey, babe,' said Matt frowning at Molly as he walked to them and hugged Kim around the shoulders, 'What's going on here?'

'Molly's going to borrow my green dress. You know the green one I had when I played Joan of Ark.'

'Oh, right,' he said still frowning at Molly which caused Kim to look confused, 'Uh, you okay?'

'Sorry, no problem. I just thought we would spend time together today,' he said and looked at full on ignoring Molly.

She was confused and actually annoyed now. Why was he like this? It wasn't like she would tell anything to Kim. Why would she?

Shaking her head she waved a bit at Kim to make her look at her and signed her.

 _I end Bio with you, but I can wait for you after the cheerleading practise for you?_

'Perfect,' said Kim smiling and took Molly's hand suddenly, 'I promise you will not be disappointed.'

The bell rang and Matt almost dragged Kim away.

Owen walked to Molly, 'So you and Kim are now buddies too?'

Molly turned around and gave him an upset look all the anger for Matt boiling up.

 _Yeah, and with Jay, so if you or Corina have a problem with that! Deal with it!_

She didn't wait for an answer and walked away upset slamming her backpack down in class startling Jay who was now sitting next to her in this class.

She looked at her confused as if she was asking what was wrong.

Molly shook her head too upset to sign and just in front of her waiting for this stupid class to end.

Her phone vibrated and even though it was risky as hell she looked.

 _ **I don't have much friends, Mo, so I cannot speak much from experience. It's just me and my bros a lot. Did you lose someone like that?**_

Molly thought about a lot of people who used ot hang out with her when she was little, then in middle school and now.

 _I'm always losing someone..._

* * *

Mikey re-read the message several times.

 _I'm always losing someone..._

Did it actually mean she really was losing someone right now? Who and why? He asked her but she didn't respond. School was so annoying sometimes.

He went to watch the video again. Since the encounter with the girl who knew sign language he was getting pretty good in reading the signs. He knew he must have rubbish in speaking, but reading was fine.

He understood many words and although it took him 2 or 3 times to fill them into a correct sentence he still thought he did a hell of a good job.

* * *

The first and only time Molly Jones ever was on a cheerleading practise was when one of their teachers got sick and they didn't have a substitute. Yup, Molly from three weeks ago would be caught dead than to sit through one of those, but now she was here actually looking at the girls dancing in front of her.

Kim was right. It looked...like they were having fun and were honestly happy.

She saw them laughing and when they messed up a routine the perfect cheerleaders actually laughed and made fun of themselves. Definitely not like they show them in the movies.

Molly smiled as well feeling actually good about coming to see them like this. To see that they were just ordinary girls like the rest of them.

'Okay, we need to talk,' said Matt suddenly as he sat down behind her on the bleacher.

She shot him an annoyed look. She was upset with him about being so rude to her, like sure she knew they had rules but did he have to be such a dickhead about it?

She looked back at the practise.

'Molly, please I'm talking to you,' he said.

She pulled out her phone and texted him since it would be pointless to sign when he couldn't see her.

 _What?_

She heard him sigh, before he pulled out his phone and texted her back.

 _Matt: I'm sorry, but you and Kim. It's weird. More than weird. It's wrong. It will only cause problems._

 _Why? It's not like you two are dating for real, is it? There are no real feelings or are they?_

 _Matt: Of course not, but Kim... she's really good in pretending. She will make you feel bad about it. I just know it. I don't want you to feel worst than necessary...I don't want you too hurt at all Molly. I love you._

The girl sighed and nodded.

 _I love you too, but I don't want to be control by us being in secret. I...I feel like all this time it's me giving up things for us. I'm always home whenever your available. I always avoid Kim like plague. I always look alone._

 _Matt: What you want t fake boyfriend too?_

 _No, I want us to be...I want us not to be a secret anymore._

 _Matt: You know we can't. My parents...they're complicated._

 _Then what? What will we do? In a year or two? After graduation? Do you plan us to always just stay in secret? What until you and Kim get married and have kids?_

 _Matt: Whoa-whoa, where is this all coming from?_

 _I'm just pissed of all of this. I'm pissed of pretending of just doing things I don't want to when there are so much more important things in the world than keeping secrets._

 _Matt: So what you want to break up? What? Why? So you can be friends with Kim? What the hell Molly?_

Just than a bunch a girls laughed down under them.

 _I just want to not feel like such a bad person all the time._

She put her phone into her pocket and waited.

He sent her only one more message before he walked away.

 _I love you_.

* * *

Kim parked the car in front of a nicely looking suburban house, 'Here we are. My mom is home, so please don't listen to anything embarrassing she says about me.'

Molly nodded shortly before she got out. Of course Kim had an amazing house with beautiful garden and everything a person could dream off.

'It's okay, it's just Cassie,' said the red head as she led her into the house a golden retriever barking at them happily.

'Mom? I brought a friend!' called the cheerleader when they entered.

A woman in her forties who looked just like Kim only a few pounds bigger came from the kitchen, 'Well, hello girls.'

'Mom, this is Molly Jones, I told you about her. Molly, meet my mom.'

Molly raised her hand to wait at her and Kim's mom smiled at her and signed while talking, 'Call me Dolores.'

Molly was surprised. Did Kim talk about her a lot that her mom knew she was mute.

'Molly works at the kid's centre and needs a princess dress for their Medieval event tonight.'

'Oh, your green dress would look amazing on her,' said her mom instantly.

'That's what I thought!' said the girl excited.

'You take Molly to your room and I will bring some food and drinks,' said the woman and disappeared into another room while Kim nodded at her to take her upstairs.

'My mom has back problems so she's staying home for a couple of months now. It's nothing too serious, but she has problems to sit for too long. She worked as an accountant for a lawyers' firm downtown,' explained Kim as they walked.

'It's probably for the best. We're taking care of dad's parents now so at least she can help them. They live in the house next door.'

Molly raised her brows. Seeing Kim life was like watching some Christmas movie where everything was great and everyone loved each other.

She followed her upstairs to what looked like her room. It was a nice girly bathroom which just screamed _sugar_.

She would have roll her eyes and made fun of it seeing how genuine Kim looked about everything and there was no one to tell this, she would just let it slid for now.

Kim immediately went to her closet. Her room was spotless of course.

'Make yourself at home. I had it just here.'

Molly went to sit on a small chair in front of mirror. Her room looked like something out of a modern fairytale. Kim would definitely pass for a princess if she wanted to.

'Aha!' said the girl victoriously before pulling out the most beautiful green dress Molly ever saw. This looked like it caused a lot too.

'It might be a bit long for you, but I think we can patch that up. Want to try it?' asked Kim looking really excited so the other girl nodded.

She put her backpack and jacket on Kim's bed feeling a bit bad about it and looked at her. Not that she didn't undress a million of times, but inside Kim's bedroom it felt weird.

'I think all you need is just to put down the hoodie and leave the bra and t-shirt on,' said Kim probably noticing how shy she got about.

Molly nodded and did just that. Kim took the dress and helped her put it on immediately after she fixed it tying the laces and everything. It looked very pretty and nothing like Molly would ever find or be able to led or buy with her money.

Kim finally stepped away looking very pleased about how Molly looked in the dress.

Her mom chose that moment to walk in and smiled as well, 'Oh, you look so pretty Molly. Green is a very nice colour on you.'

Kim smiled at her, 'That's what I said. I think I should just push this hem under so it's not so long and she will all good. What's your shoe size?'

Molly raised her fingers.

'Oh, I got bigger feet,' she said and looked like she was in the process of thinking.

'I think that if you keep the skirt long enough to cover her feet she could go with her sneakers on,' said her mom and put the food and two glasses Kim's table.

'Yeah, that could work. At least you won't be cold. I was so cold on the stage when we had Joan of Arc two years ago.'

'I told you to wear warm soaks,' said her mother, but in a mean way more like as a matter of fact and friendly reminder.

'True. You should always listen to elderly,' joked Kim.

'Oi,' said her mom before she kneeled in front of Molly and started to work on the hem of the skirt. Molly was honestly surprised since she never met people like Kim and her mom. People who just... well were genuinely helpful. Like you have a problem here let me help you without asking anything in return. People usually didn't want to be bothered with problems but it felt like Kim and her mom were the type of people who jumped at the opportunity to help out anyone in need.

They fixed the dress and Dolores stayed a bit to chat with Molly until she had to go to Kim's grandparents.

Molly really thought she was in a Christmas movie given how warm and welcome she felt in the house. It was so strange. From Matt's description she thought Kim's parent would be stricked religious monsters just like his, but in all truth they were nice people. She couldn't imagine them forcing Kim into dating Matt.

She was so confused now...could...could it be that Matt was lying? That he wasn't force to be with Kim at all?

Biting her lip she looked away from Kim's warm brown eyes to the small bookshelf with pictures at the top. Her eyes landed on the one where Matt and Kim and a group of other teens were in front of a church.

She pointed at it and then signed.

'Yes, that's our church and our church club. We have this club with teens and younger people so we can hang out and not just be with adults. I mean, we're kids and teens sometimes we want to talk about things which are confusing for our parents.'

Molly nodded.

 _Is that how you and Matt meet?_

She swore herself she wouldn't talk about Matt, but how could she not when she had this terrible feeling like he was lying to her all this time?

'Yes and no. Our parents are friends, so I knew Matt for a long time now, I just didn't pay him much attention before. Our parents were always insisting that we go out and talk and hang out and what not. I was a bit unsure since this already happened once and it didn't work out for me, but Matt was...he was different. I feel like we have a lot in common, and like I can be myself around him. I feel that he's the type of person who understands me and my values and what's important for me. I'm a bit of an overarchiever, teachers' pet and _the perfect girl_. I know all about that, and yes, I am all those things, so it was hard to find someone who wasn't intimated by all of this and loves me for who I am.'

Molly forced herself to smile as best as she could but deep inside she felt like she wanted to scream. Was it...was Kim just such a good actress? If she was honestly fake dating Matt could she just be playing her part in front of Molly? She still didn't know she and Matt were fake dating so it might as well be it, but at the same time...how? She said she played Joan of Ark, but this felt...everything about Kim Sawyer felt genuine so it was impossible for Molly to imagine that she was just playing it in front of her. Kim was just... she looked honest.

'What?' asked Kim, 'Did I say something?'

Molly shook her head trying not to look how she felt before she signed.

 _I just remembered someone I liked and how messy it ended nothing to do with you._

Kim looked sad, 'Sorry to hear that. Sometimes it ends that way, I guess. I had a couple of bad dates, but nothing to be heartbroken about yet. I guess I'm lucky.'

Molly nodded.

 _More than you know._

Eventually she took the dress and Kim drover her back to school so Molly could take her car and get home and to the kid's centre on time.

* * *

Molly got out of the kid's center feeling pretty damn good about herself. They had a party for the kids. Sort of medieval costumes with a sleepover. It was a lot of work, and she had to stay there pretty late, but she still thought it was worth it. Some people like the councils we left to keep an eye on them during the night while she decided to go home during like 3a.m.

She was carrying her long princess dress in a black dress cover, which Kim landed her. It would have been long for her, but Kim actually did the effort to fix it so it was just write.

Molly felt so weird about all of it especially being sort of friends now with Jay and Kim. Jay and Kim. It was a while now since she didn't say their surnames. It was like now she only came to terms that they were real people too.

She went into her car putting the dress carefully inside. Her mind drifted to Mikey. Was he on patrol now? He had to be. When she wrote him about wearing a princess dress he got excited yet he didn't ask for a picture. Probably so she wouldn't ask for his.

She was tempted at times to ask him though…well to tell him.

 _Thank you for keeping the city safe. Thank you for giving people hope that it can get better._

She had millions of questions and ideas in her head, but two sentences were the only things which really mattered in the end.

It took her five times to try and start her car only to realize it was hopeless.

Cursing inside herself, she went to reach for her backpack only to find it gone.

 _Damn it, I went home after school._

This meant she had no phone or cash just her home and car keys. Bummer.

She walked outside. All she had was the camera she took to take pictures of the kids and then post them on the centre's website. She didn't like the thought of leaving the dress or the camera in the car at night so she took them.

Molly continued to walk the street feeling safer knowing that Mikey and the others must have been out protecting it. She wondered if she would meet him again. She actually wanted to maybe hang around a bit to see if she would, but decided against it as it would be too dangerous.

Just as she was walking thought someone knocked into her shoulder while running. She recognized the jacket as something Nicole Diaz often wore, but the girl was someone else completely.

'Fucking watched it!' called the girl.

'Leave her! Let's get out before that green monster comes back!'

Molly's heart started to pound. Green monster...could it be?

She started to walk faster to the side she saw those two run from. There was a lot of young people around and a bouncer in front of one of the clubs. It was probably a high class club since all the people were very expensive and fashionable clothing.

Molly knew the turtles only engaged in things happening in the alleys and dark places to avoid people seeing them too clearly, so she went to pick to the alley behind the club. She didn't see anyone or anything suspicious and some trash all over the alley, but that could mean anything or nothing at all. Disappointed knowing she probably wouldn't see them tonight she started to walk until she noticed a familiar car parked in front of the club in the parking lot.

 _Why was Matt here? Wasn't he supposed to be with Kim?_

It was confusing to Molly since she knew Kim wasn't the type to go to clubs. High school parties sure, but clubs?

For some reason she hid herself in the shadows and started to casually walked to the front of the car to look if it really was Matt's car.

She full on froze when she saw it really was his car and it was occupied with Matt and Nicole Diaz making out on the front seat.

She was...she couldn't even put to word what she was feeling. Betray, guilt, anger, disappointment and humiliation all mixed into one feeling which was impossible to name.

Without thinking she took the camera she still had in her jacket and took a picture before she put it into her jacket and quickly ran away gripping the dress as hard as she could.

She made it home in minimum time locking the door and collapsing in her bedroom on the floor crying and just fucking... shaking like some junky without a shot. How...how could he it? How could...he was...she loved him and he...

* * *

Mikey just got home from a patrol. He was dead on his feet. He had a weird feeling like he did a lot today. Even more than usually.

He was about to crash on his bed and just forget the world, when he noticed his computer was still turned on.

He told Donnie he would start to turn in off if he wasn't asleep so he went to do so when he noticed a text from Mo.

 _Are you here? Please tell me you're here? I...I something happened! I don't know who to talk to. Please, Mikey._

The message was ten minutes old, but he could clearly feel the panic behind the words and it was all it took for him to wake up as well.

 _ **Just got home. Molly, what is it? Are you okay? What happened? Talk to me, please.**_

 _I work in the kid centre...I stayed there late tonight went out and..._

Mikey's heart dropped as in his mind he remembered all the horrible things he and his brothers witness or prevented during a patrol, and he got scared one of those things happened to her tonight.

 _Mikey, I'm a terrible person._

Jesus Christ, the suspense was killing him!

 _ **What happened?**_

 _I've been seeing this guy and he just cheated on me and his girlfriend with another girl, and I just...it's so fucked up and I'm so sorry I don't know why I'm telling you this. This is completely not important considering everything which...is going on right now._

Mikey reread the message over and over again confused more than anything. He went back to the time he thought Mo was a gay dude who was hooking up with his gay buddy whenever he said a friend was coming over. Since Mo was a girl it made sense that she had a boyfriend...well friend she was seeing as she called him, but he had a girlfriend? And another girl? Like what the hell?

 _ **Mo, listen, I'm trying to wrap my head around this. Please fill me in? And please calm down, freaking out is not ok.**_

 _Okay. I've been seeing this guys during the summer before the high school, but we never made any promises or whatever and then when I came to high school he was fake dating this girl for his parents and well at first it was okay, to just be together in secret, but lately...lately I felt like a shitty person more and more because his fake girlfriend didn't know about us and today I had this feeling like maybe I...like maybe she, the girlfriend wasn't faking it for their parents and actually loved him and..._

She paused for a while before she continued.

 _I just feel like such an asshole and terrible person. I literally am all those girls I always bitch about. I'm the mean girl._

Mikey reread it all over again not sure what to say. He was so shocked. Mo, Molly was his friend and yeah, okay he wasn't an naive turtle born yesterday, but this was...hardcore.

Still, she was his friend.

So taking a deep breath he answered as honest as possibly.

 _ **I think you**_ _ **'re the person who takes care of her nana's well being, worries about her brother, and always tells me to stay safe when I go out. I think you're a good person who just made a couple of mistakes. Isn't that just being human?**_

He hoped it didn't sound to lame. It felt lame now.

 _Thanks Mikey._

He smiled a bit.

 _ **Sure, what are friends for? Now deep breathe and explain it all to me again please.**_

In the next three hours they wrote about everything which happened and it was just then that Mikey realize he finally got to know Molly Jones. She told him everything about her secret douchbag boyfriend who she sort of told she needed a break, his fake girlfriend who maybe wasn't so fake after all, her friends who got pissed because she made a new friend with another girl she cold ex Ice queen and was talking with the bitch he bullied her a bit and apparently made out with douchbag.

 _ **I think you're going to need to make me a diagram to understand all this.**_

He wrote finally.

She went to bed after that saying she send the picture she took of the two to the third girl who kissed with the douchbag. He suggested she stayed home and chat with him.

 _Tempting, but nana would be suspicious and you need the rest. Thank, Mi. You...you're really a good friend._

 _ **Right back at ya.**_

Despite that he was tired as hell now and Raph even turned on his music indicating that he woke up Mikey didn't go to bed just yet. He thought he knew Mo pretty well, after she told him she was a girl and that she was mute, but now...now he _actually_ knew her. She...like Leo put it...she let him in and showed him her dark corners.

He felt a bit bad now. She told him a lot about herself while he still kept a secret he was a giant ninja turtle.

 _Well, crap._

He lied down on his bed annoyed and frustrated. Frustrated because Mo was upset, because he didn't know her before, because she was in love with a fucking asshole cheater who had a fake girlfriend, secret girlfriend and another girl he was kissing inside a car?

He rolled his eyes. This was such a cliché he was actually a bit pissed at Mo for this. Cool chicks like her who played Fortnite, watched Tv shows and listen to weird music shouldn't fall for assholes like that.

He opened his eyes and pulled out his phone. He knew he shouldn't but ever since he weasled Mo's full name out of Donnie he was tempted. Like it was some sort of secret Christmas present he knew he shouldn't and wouldn't look, but _God_ he was tempted.

He first tried facebook and other accounts. He found a lot of Molly Jones even in the NY area. Of course Mo Jones he was looking for had a ssdds as profil pic and all her settings to private. He went to the pictures and was surprised he found her tagged in a couple of them on one of NY's kids centre.

It didn't take a genius to recognize her as the only girl with light pink hair there. She was a short Afro-American girl with long hair covered a bit by a beanie. She was standing behind a small girl with a doll hugging her.

She looked... damn she looked cute. He was actually really pretty. Donnie said she looked weird with the hair, but in Mikey's opinion she looked cool.

He bit the inside of his cheek. _**Don't go falling for a girl who is in love with someone else, bro.**_

She looked like she was something.

He scrolled a bit through the photos she was tagged in. She was only allowed to be seen in the photos from the kids' centre. After a couple of events he found photo of her with greenish hair and laughed a bit. She apparently liked to change her hair colour a lot. It seemed like only a phase or maybe they didn't have a lot of events because in the next one she had brownish hair.

Closing his eyes Mikey finally was letting his tiredness along with how comfy his bed felt to him.

Brown hair...for a moment his mind drifted to someone else who had brown hair.

He opened his eyes as a memory of the girl who signed him _thank you_ came to mind. Since so much time had passed it was hard for him to actually picture her face or how she looked apart from the signing. She was also Afro-American just like Mo, maybe that was why he was suddenly putting their faces together. Sure, right, both knew sign language, but that didn't mean anything. He apparently had a type.

Smirking to himself he fell asleep. Don't be an idiot. 1st one you will never meet again. 2nd one is in love with someone else. An asshole, but still in love.

He fell asleep after that dreaming about Molly with different hair colour like yellow or red or orange. Maybe orange would look nice on her.

* * *

Molly didn't sleep much as her alarm clock went up immediately as she felt like dozing off. She wanted to write to Mikey, but knowing he was up all knighting patrolling the city was enough to stop her. He deserved the sleep.

She went to the bathroom in front of her mirror. She wasn't big on makeup, but she decided to actually to do a little bit of something today as she looked like hell because of the lack of sleep.

'Hey, are you okay? How was yesterday?' asked her nana as she made her breakfast.

She didn't lie when she told her all about how amazing the event went. She totally lied about nothing eventful happening as she walked home.

'Whoa, Kim is really nice to lend you her dress,' said her nana.

 _Church girl, but yes, she's super nice._

Nana smiled at her and nodded probably not noticing her odd behaviour at all. She was good in pretending after all.

* * *

In school Molly felt like she would throw up several times whenever she caught glimpse of Matt or his friends or God forbid Nicole. She full on avoided all Jay as well as Corina and Owen which left her mostly to be by herself inside of the bathroom or spending time in the office of the school's magazine.

'Hey, how did it go?' asked her Kim as she went to return her dress.

She smiled hoping it look just as sincere as Kim's smiles usually were. She felt like she should...she wasn't sure what she should, but she felt like maybe she should be nicer to her or friendlier or...she wasn't sure. Weren't they both cheated by the same guy?

Time went by a bit and Molly was well alone. She used to spent time with at least Owen, Corina or Amanda, but she felt like she somehow couldn't look at him knowing she was cheated by Matt like an idiot for so long. She couldn't spend time with Jay because she was constantly with Nicole, who cheated with Matt on Kim as well. She couldn't spent _too_ much with Kim because the whole guilt thing was eating her up from the inside even though sometimes she forgot about it when Kim sat down next to her and started to discuss something totally not Matt or Nicole related.

Mostly she now spent time with Mi. Well, not _literally_ spent time, as Mi still didn't know Molly knew he was a giant ninja turtle, more like constantly texted and chatted with him.

Not much had changed in their relationship which she was enternally grateful, she was afraid someone as noble as a vigilante would have been pissed that he was friends with a cheater like her, but luckily Mi seemed to accept it and felt very proud about her not being with Matt anymore.

She was too. It was good. As long as Mi was there to chat it was good. She could go on like that forever even, writing her website, writing for the magazine, being semi-friends with Kim, avoiding all her friends, spending _way_ too much time with her nana and chatting with Mi about everything. The only times when it seemed like it wasn't enough was when Mi was out protecting NY and her nana was watching TV or at her dance class and she was just alone with her thoughts. Her stupid hormonal teenage thoughts thinking about Matt and that he seemed like he didn't even give a fuck that she stopped replying to his text.

It's one thing to cut someone out of your life, but it's another thing to realize that person doesn't care about it enough.

Still, given what happened next after those few weeks Molly should have been grateful Matt was avoiding her, because when he finally came back into her life. He fucked it up completely.

* * *

Leo pulled out his phone.

'What the girl can't go five minutes without?' teased Raph, 'Kind of clingy.'

'Shut up,' mumbled Leo before he picked up and took a step away from them to talk in private.

Mikey let out an annoyed sigh. They had work to do no dates. He knew he was only being pissed off because Mo decided to talk to her ex boyfriend, but still…. She had been doing good, at least from what he could tell. She was playing Fortnite and chatting with him. He felt like he finally knew her. Like actually _knew_ her. He also felt like in a certain way she knew him as well. Maybe he was just being jealous. Yeah, he spent _way_ too much time with just Mo on their own, so now when she wanted to talk things out with her ex, he was well…he was afraid he wouldn't spent so much time with her. Not to mention the ex was an asshole who cheated on two girl with a third one? What a colossal dick?!

'Wait, are you sure?' asked Leo suddenly his voice anything but sweet and romantic as Mikey would assume.

'Okay, we'll be there. Don't get too close or let anyone see you,' said Leo and ended the call turning toward them.

'We have to go back. Someone's putting explosives in the subway,' said their older brother.

They all looked confused.

'What? Who told you this? Your girlfriend?' asked Raph putting every hint of questionable into his words.

'What explosives? And how does she know?' asked Donnie already probably thinking on how to act in this situation.

'I don't know, she just said she went down and saw some guys putting something on the subway pillars. I'm guessing it's not a present for people of NY,' said Leo annoyed, 'So what are you coming?'

Mikey raised his hands, 'No need to get defensive, bro. We're coming.'

Leo jumped on the second roof and Mikey followed him.

* * *

Molly put on her jeans and sweater and beanie. She wasn't going anywhere, but she wanted to make a point to Matt that _no_ she didn't want to get back together. The two of them meeting today was only to talk.

She was positive that would be the message her clothes and herself would be sending. It was way past their usually meeting time, but since he urged her so much about it she agreed that he could sneak into her room. Somehow knowing her nana was sleeping in the next room made it all the more feel safe.

She tried to text Mi one more time, but he didn't answer. He was still pissed that she went through with the meeting in the first place. She didn't blame him though, but it was not his situation too. Matt…was… her Matt. Her first love and a part of her even if he cheated still loved him. She would always love him, right? Isn't that what first love really was?

She got a text from Matt. She was made sure her nana's room was silent before she let him into the apartment and her room.

So it began.

'Thanks again, for well, letting me explain,' he said as he sat down on her bed. He was speaking in a very soft voice making sure he wouldn't make too much noise.

She nodded and sat down on her desk chair to be opposite from him.

 _Well, start._

He sighed, 'Okay, so…about Nicole that was a mistake. I was upset about you and Kim was just being Kim so I had to get out. I went with a couple of friends to the club. Nicole was there and she kissed me. I pushed her away, but then we went to talk she was feeling down so that's why we went to talk in my car smoke some weed. Things heated and we made out, but that's it. No sex.'

 _Whoa, good to know you only sleep with Kim._

'I only sleep with you!' he snapped at her surprising her a bit.

'I don't sleep with Kim or Nicole. Just with you, and-and if you want to know why was I upset in the first place it's also because of you!'

 _What the hell did I do?_

'What you did? I don't know because lately I don't know shit about the girl I love. You don't tell me anything, you don't ask me to come or meet you. Lately it feels…it feels like you don't love me anymore. You stopped texting me and calling me over, and you….you changed. You started to hang out with Jay McClaud? Kim? Like what about Owen? Corina? Amanda? Aren't they supposed to be your best friends? Yet you don't even sit with them in the cafeteria anymore. You…you don't…you feel like you don't care anymore about your old life, and I…I'm upset. And then out of the blue you tell me you want a break from us? I don't know what to think,' he said looking everywhere but at her. He looked so…hurt. Like she actually hurt him.

She brushed her arm.

 _So what are you saying?_

'What I am saying? I already said plenty. I want to know what you are saying. We used to talk all the time, and now…now you barely look at me.'

 _You're dating Kim!_

'But I love you!' he snapped at her, 'I love you, and if you want…I'll break up with her. Right now,' he stood up and pulled out his phone, 'I'll call her wake her up and break up with her.'

He actually stood up and grabbed his phone. Panicked Molly jumped up as well putting her hand over his phone before she signed.

 _Don't do that!_

Matt nodded looking disappointed for some reason, 'That's what I though. You keep putting _Kim_ over me like I'm the only one who wants us to be like this when really you want us to be like this too because deep down you don't want to date me in public. You don't want to date a jock or church boy, and you definitely do not want to date Kim Sawyer's ex.'

 _Not true!_

'It is! You…you love having your thing. Being the rebel. Being the anarchist. Knowing people think you're unaffected! You don't want them to know you're been hooking up with a jock behind his girlfriend's back for almost a year!'

Molly shook her head and stepped aside.

'You want to be the weird girl not the cheater or the bitch who stole Kim Sawyer's heart.'

 _You made me!_

'I? I made you? Molly, cut the act. If you didn't want us to be together we wouldn't be, and you know it. You can't put that on me. It takes two to cheat.'

Molly shook her head feeling like she was loosing it because he was right. She was the one who suggested it. She was the one who didn't stop it. She was the one who caused all of it. All her!

'It's why we always get back together, Molly. We're both are who we are and we cannot change. We're both sinners.'

* * *

They found a person standing in front of the entrance to the subway. At first Mikey was confused and startled why did Leo just walked to the person until he realized that in the blackish hoodie with a jacket on and scarf covering most of the face must have been Jay.

Whoa, well, pointers for staying a _secret_ girlfriend. Man, no way bad guys would tell there's a blonde chick underneath that.

'Probably ugly,' he caught the end of what Raph was mumbling to Donnie and Mikey chuckled, 'Look who's talking.'

Raph went to punch him but he jumped away and accidentally crashed into Leo's back.

He turned around hoping to look sorry as Leo shot him a look and Raph chuckled at him, 'Smooth.'

Leo urged them to go not give them time to introduce themselves to the girl.

* * *

Molly spun around from him brushing her hair. This was pointless, he was totally turning it upside down.

She felt him put his hand on her shoulder and spun her around.

'Come on! You want me to break up with Kim? I'll do it! I'll tell my parents, the whole school, the whole fucking New York.'

When he looked into her eyes she felt like she was fourteen again meeting him for the first time. She felt like she was falling all over again into the black hole she managed to get herself out with Mi's help for the past weeks.

'I love you, Molly Jones.'

She let him kiss her telling herself it was the last time. Just for a little bit to feel good again. Just for a little bit not to feel alone, not to miss the human contact.

* * *

Once they were down Mikey was almost glad he saw the masked guys in black since it meant Raph couldn't bitch anymore about Leo's girl calling. However, the moment he realized they actually put an explosive device on the pillar of the subway as the ticking started his joy quickly faded.

Fighting was always very simple for Mikey. Over the years he and his brothers were trained and taught how to become a team, how to think and as if they were one and how to do so in zip of time.

So when Leo turned toward him and nodded at Raph while looking at him and then looking directly at Donnie and nodding at him they all knew that he wanted him and Raph to fight those punks while Leo and Donnie would look at the bomb. It should have been easy, and it was. Just two punks no biggie and Raph got them really quickly. Raph even threw one of them across the subway. It was funny.

They heard Donnie's loud _got it_ , and thought it was all over until he heard rapid footsteps down the stairs.

Leo's girl.

* * *

They were on the bed. It felt so familiar. It felt just like it always did when they were together. They kissed and his hands went under her sweater and that was when she remembered Mikey and his words of encouragement when she told him she was done with Matt and what he wrote her that day and other days. She remembered how he handed her backpack and smiled a bit at her looking at her Marvel t-shirt. She was sure he wanted to make a reference or something right then.

Suddenly kissing Matt felt different. It felt bad, rotten, dirty.

She pushed him away shaking her head telling him she didn't want this, but he continued to kiss her some more until she lost her patience and full on pushed him off the bed standing up.

 _I don't want this anymore!_

She had the worst feeling inside her stomach all of a sudden. She felt like something really bad was about to happen.

* * *

'IT'S A TRAP!' shouted the girl just as Mikey caught movement from the other side of the subway. Someone ran out from there and shouted.

'For you my dark lord!' shouted the man in Japanese of all languages before he pressed a button on some device. Now, Mikey might not have been a brainer, but he was not a complete idiot and the moment he saw the device and the dude's finger going for the big red butter he jumped close to Leo's chick sending her to the ground with his body on top her just as he felt his body getting crushed by tones of something seriously heavy and the whole world went dark.

* * *

Suddenly he felt strange like he didn't want him to be there. Like he wanted him to leave now. He was not okay with him being there and kissing and touching him.

'Come on,' said the boy and moved toward him pressing him into the wall hard. He tried to get him off.

'Don't be like that. I love you and I know you love me,' he said and kissed his neck, but he wasn't feeling it. He tried to push him away but the wall mixed with the fact that he was larger than him was forbidding him from it.

There was a struggle now, he wanted him to let go, but he wouldn't.

The boy spun him around and tried to get into his pants literally. He felt the boys hands inside his underwear and touching his butt while he was breathing heavily into his hear.

He finally managed to break his wrist free and with all his might punch the asshole into the face.

He tried to scream only to find out he couldn't. What...wait...why did no sound came out.

He touched his neck hearing the boy complain and whine that he broke his nose. He looked at his hands. They were...different...they were human and black. He was human and he had boobs! Holy shit he was a girl! What...what happened?! Before he had time to analyze it more the boy was back up and threw him against the wall his nose was bleeding badly, 'What the fuck?!'

In an instant the boy punched him into the side of the face and he was on the ground now. It hurt like hell...what? but he...

 _ **WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON?!**_

Another punch into the face knocked him out for good this time.

* * *

It was like someone turned off and on the light switch as he suddenly heard a girl's cry out and his whole body froze on instinct.

His heart was beating like a drum and slowly very slowly his surroundings were becoming clear again. His hand was raised ready to punch and only inches away from hitting someone in front of him.

Blonde curls.

That was all he recognized for a moment before his brain started to work again and based on the hoodie and jacket he could recognize Leo's Jay in front of him looking terrified as he must have almost punched her.

'Oh God,' said Mikey and put his hand down Leo immediately by his side with his hand on his shoulder and Jay falling to her knees breathing hard probably from fear as he almost punched in the face.

'Wha-what happened?' he asked confused and started. He felt like crying. What happened? What-?

All around him he could smell dust and dirty and something very spicy which was hurting his nose.

'The subway roof collapsed from the explosion. You shield Jay but you must have knocked your head. I tried to hold you back but you were trashing too much. You said stay away,' explained Leo quickly. It was just then that Mikey realize the arm on his shoulder was just as much there to keep Jay safe than to comfort him.

'I…I had a dream…I don't know,' he said and looked down at his hands and body. He wasn't human anymore. He was himself again. Thank God…what was that? Who the hell was that asshole and the girl? Why did he feel like crying all of the sudden?

'Japan?' asked Jay suddenly and both of the turtles looked up at her.

'You saw it too?' asked Leo sounding startled.

Jay nodded slowly, 'It…it was like I was someone else.'

'-Watching through someone else's eyes,' said Leo and the girl nodded. Both of them looked pretty shaken up from whatever it was they saw.

'I…I wasn't in Japan,' said Mikey shaking his head trying to focus on what was happening but failing as he was still startled and shaken.

'I was in a room with some guy. He…he beat me…her up,' he said.

'Her?' asked Jay softly.

'It felt like I was inside a body of some girl,' he said with a disgusted taste in his mouth that some girl somewhere was getting beating possibly raped by that piece of shit.

Suddenly a very bad feeling ran through him and he stood up again, 'I need to call Mo.'

'Mo?'

'His girlfriend,' replied Leo before he stopped him, 'Mikey, we need to find Donnie and Raph before people like police and firefighters come.'

Jay shook her head, 'I'm sure I saw one flying out of the subway.'

'Raph or Donnie?'

Jay grimaced and Leo nodded to himself, 'Right, well this is Mikey.'

'Nice to meet you when you're not trying to punch me,' she said almost lightly before she suddenly remembered something and looked to the side where the roof blocked path to the train.

'Look, sorry about that, but I have to call Mo,' he said and picked up his phone. She was mute and he didn't have her phone number so of course he couldn't _call_ her.

 _ **Please, please, please text me you're okay, as soon as you get this message.**_

'What the hell?' he asked annoyed as his message got fail to send. He needed to know if Mo was okay. His heart was beating like crazy. Mo wanted to talk with her ex too. Wait, what? That made no sense how could he be inside Mo's head? How? He….he didn't know, but he had to chat with her. He had to know she was okay! Damn he had to see her! He had to know she was okay!

'No wifi or signal down here now,' said Leo.

'Oh my God, someone was inside the train,' said Jay suddenly.

'Are you sure?' asked Leo taking a step closer.

'Yes, I saw…red hair I think and then one of your bothers flying out of the subway as the roof collapsed,' explained Jay before looking to the side which had buried the train.

They all walked toward the damaged side of the subway.

'So what do we do now?' asked Jay with a serious look on her face.

'We can't get out through the entrance of the subway,' explained Leo, 'People are probably already out there. We can't reach anyone without a signal. Right now our best shot is to go inside the subway further through the tracks to hide. We don't know where Donnie and Raph are right now and we cannot just randomly start digging,' said Leo and looked at Mikey and Jay.

'Okay,' said the Jay with an expression which told Mikey he would surely admire Leo's girl, 'then let's get to it.'

Mikey immediately launched himself at the rocks. He needed to find his brothers, get whoever was inside the train out of there, but most importantly he needed to contact Molly.

* * *

Molly carefully rolled onto her side feeling her head was going to explode from the pain caused by the two sharp blows she received by man. She didn't know how long she was out, but she knew what happened well sort of…It was like for a moment she lost control of her body and mind and when Matt wouldn't let her go, she punched him.

She was surprised her little hands had the strength to do so. She looked at her hands just as Matt go up and punched her back.

He punched her. She punched him first but still she's a petite girl while he is a basketball player, and he just full on punched her and twice.

Then he told her it was her own fault and walked away…like…what? Why would he tell her that? Why because she punched him first…he wouldn't stop. She pushed him away and he wouldn't stop, so she just wanted him to back off. She lost consciousness for a moment and when she woke up she found him taking a picture of her in her underwear.

She was too terrified to say anything and just watched in shock and horror as he put his phone away into his pocket and walked away. He stripped her and took a picture? Why?! What for? What…

When she looked down at her legs now she saw them…her scars. She had them since that terrible day at gym in her middle school when the girls pushed her to the ground and took a stupid pair of compasses and…

 _Do you think she will not scream if we cut her a bit? I bet we could get her to scream real quickly if we cut her a bit._

She shook the terrible memories she buried back into the bottomless pit of her mind where they should stay forever.

 _Why did he do that?!_

She grabbed her hoodie immediately and pulled it on feeling almost like she was wanted to hide under that hoodie completely.

She touched her face and started to shake as the pain kicked in ever harder.

Her phone buzzed with a new message. She almost was afraid to answer thinking it might be Matt but instead it was Amanda.

 _Amanda: Oh my God! Did you see this? Is that who I think it is?_

Molly opened the picture and froze as she realized she knew the girl who was being carried by the paramedics into the ambulance. She was pale and looked unconscious or dead, without any single part of the glow of happiness she usually had around her.

Molly felt like throwing up her pain suddenly felt nothing compare to the pain she felt as she saw the girl being carried into the ambulance.

 _ **Mo, please, answer me as soon as you get this message. Something really bad happened today.**_

He was right. Something very bad happened today.

She threw the phone away feeling she was going to die in that very moment, feeling like for some reason she was the cause of all the bad things which happened right now.

Shaking her head still confused she texted him.

 _I'm fine, what happened?  
_

* * *

 **A.N: Hey guys, I know I said I would have the new chapter yesterday, but I got sick so I couldn't finish it until now. Some of the parts may seemed rushed but the chapter was getting too long and some parts just didn't feel like they needed more space. I hope you enjoy it, nevertheless. Anyway, next chapter is with Kim and Donnie. Since I am sick. I can't promise when will it be ready and when will I update, I will try to do it asap. Thank you to all for the support and kind words. I am very grateful for every opinion.**

 **Also let me know what you think about this one, okay?**


	13. The Perfect Girl 01

**The Perfect Girl**

* * *

 _God's answer to all your questions is always yes, not yet and I have something better in mind._

* * *

There were many traditions in the Sawyers family household. Since Kim Sawyer the oldest daughter of the family was a little child she loved all of them. She enjoyed spending time with the whole family which made her feel like she was never alone even though she knew since then that she couldn't be alone if she had God in her heart.

The Sawyers lived in a friendly neighbourhood where they knew all their neighbours and most of them were a part of the Catholic Church community. Her grandparents lived in the house next to theirs, and ever since Kim understood that she would have to marry and have kids one day, she wanted to have a house close by them as well. Growing up there were many traditions Kim loved in her family, but the one she enjoyed the most was their daily family dinners.

It would be her, her baby sister Abby, her parents and her dad's parents almost every evening in their parent's house having dinner together and talking. She wasn't even sure why she chose the moment she knew would be the worst one to have that conversation. She knew it would ruin their nice dinner atmosphere, but she said it anyway. Kim was raised as a smart girl and therefore she could vividly imagine what would happen if she let those world out into the air and yet she said them anyway. Maybe she should have blamed it on the natural disaster of puberty.

Kim's father Jake stopped eating and looked over at his fourteen year old daughter in absolute shock wondering if he heard her correctly, 'You want to go a... _public_ school?'

It was the middle of the school year and there was still plenty of time for Kim Sawyer to pick up a high school. The rest of her classmates were still in the process of making decisions with their parents, but Kim wasn't like the rest of her classmates. She had been wondering about her future since she was old enough to understand that one day she had to get a job. Her dad work for a consulting firm which focused mainly on helping firms with their environmental consulting and her mom was an accountant. They have been together since university although they grew up on the same block in town. Sometimes their dad took them there for cake or burger in his favourite place. Although the town changed a lot since then and the street they grew up in particularly, some places you just keep close to your heart like that.

Either way, Kim Sawyer knew what she wanted to be since she was a little girl with chickenpox and a nice paediatrician at the hospital turned out to be a redheaded pretty woman. She started small with fake taking care of her stuffed animals, then their dog, sometimes her parents and cousins. She watched a lot of doctors' TV show and talk shows at least the once she was allowed to watch. She was always a hard worker in school always followed her granny around to get another question or for her to try her in spelling or math again.

Ever since she was a little girl Kim always worked hard to became a doctor one day. She knew she was smart enough for it. Everyone told her so, and if she looked at it honestly she was a bit brighter than average students. Since her family was very religious and belong to the Catholic church in their neighbourhood all her life she went to church related places like camps, kindergarten, after school activities even middle school. The only time Kim was ever not surrounded by people from her church was when she went to a dance class in the city when she was younger.

It wasn't like Kim was unhappy surrounded by people with her believes and who understood her and her religion. It was...she wasn't sure. It happened when she went to a high school fair with her classmates a couple of weeks back. Most of her classmates already knew they would start next in a church high on the other side of the town. It seemed like the natural step from middle school. Kim parents were probably in the process of still making their decision since a few church high school names came up as well.

Kim was walking around the fair with the rest of her classmates when she spotted bright blonde hair spread across a black jacket.

It was...strange to say the least. Kim saw many blondes there that day, but something about the girl standing close to one of the posters caught her attention. Maybe it was the hair colour. It was around the girl's head almost like a halo.

'Hi,' she caught herself saying before she could stop herself and the girl turned around looking confused at her uniform and why she was talking to her.

'Uh, hi,' said the girl. She looked so familiar Kim was sure she knew her from somewhere. She just couldn't quite figure out where...

'I'm Kim,' tried the girl slowly unsure what she was doing and feeling her friends' eyes on her back.

The blonde blinked confused, 'Jay, but I'm not interested in going to a church school. Thanks.'

Kim blinked before shaking her head and giggling a bit, 'Oh, no, I'm not in high school. I came with my class.'

The blonde nodded obviously not understand where Kim was going with this either. Honestly she looked a bit like she was annoyed or above her, but maybe that was just the way the ice cold beauty looked. She suddenly remembered snowflakes and smiled, 'You're Jay McClaud. You and Nicole Diaz were in my dance class in Mrs. Ivy's class. We had our last dance as snowflakes before Christmas.'

The blonde's face softened a bit before it got cold again, 'Yeah, sorry, I don't really remember you. Good memory though.'

'You were very talented. Do you still dance?'

'God no,' chuckled Jay, 'I hate the attention.'

'Oh, that's too bad. I think you were very good,' said Kim actually meaning it. Jay nodded looking a bit awkward and uncomfortable from the praise.

'Is that Nicole?' asked Kim as she spotted the latina girl she assumed was Nicole Diaz. It had been years but seeing Jay sort of made it easier to remember the other girl as well. Kim had to admit Nicole changed a lot. She was giggling with some girls around her.

'I gotta go. Nice to see you,' said Jay and left to Kim's surprise to the opposite direction of Nicole. Strange.

She then rushed to her classmates who were being a bit weird about her talking to some random girl like that.

Not sure why Kim turned back one last time seeing the poster that Jay was looking it.

 _Dare to be different_

For some reason those words and the encounter with Jay brought mixed feelings Kim never had before about her future. Not the part where she wanted to be a doctor and help people, or being top of her classes, but if she really wanted to continue to only be surrounded by people she knew. It was hard to explain and the moment she brought it up at family dinner she knew her dad would be confused as the rest of her family.

Kim shrugged her shoulders, 'It's just something I was thinking about for a while now.'

'B-but?' he looked from Kim to his wife before he looked at Kim again worried and suspicious, 'Is something the matter? Did something happen at school?'

Kim shook her head quickly, 'No, school is fine. It's just that I always went to catholic schools and I thought that maybe before college and medicine it would be an interesting change to a normal public school for once.'

'Am I missing something?' he asked his wife.

'In my days kids from public schools and catholic schools didn't mix,' said Kim's grandfather as helped Abby cut her food.

'Sweetie, you are attending a very good catholic middle school. All our friends from church go there. Kids there are the same ones you know your whole life,' said her father, 'You love your school so much. Why would you want to leave and go somewhere you wouldn't know anyone?' he wasn't upset just confused and suspicious about it. She didn't blame him.

Kim sighed, 'Okay, never mind. I'm sorry I've asked. Can I go now? I'm not hungry anymore'

Jake shook his head, 'No-.'

'Yes,' said Kim's mom and granny at the same time.

Kim got away from the table and went to her room.

'Okay, what is this really about?' she heard her father as before she was too far to hear him. She went into her room and brought up another one of her Latin dictionaries. Since from church many of texts were originally in Latin it never felt too hard for her. For some words pronunciation she was never quite sure but usually she got it right after a couple of tries.

She heard a knock. It was either her dad or mom and based on how soft the knock was it was her mom, 'Come in.'

Her mom raised her hand and revealed a cake on a plate in the other one, 'I thought maybe you would want one later. You know granny makes the best one.'

Kim nodded before she went to take it and put it on the desk closing and quickly clearing her books and things so she wouldn't get cake on it. She was always very tidy when it came to eating and getting food on things such as books and furniture.

Now Kim Sawyer's family wasn't like other New York families. Ever since Kim was a little girl until the age of twelve where one of her classmates told her her parents were getting a divorce, Kim honestly believed all the families were the same as her own. Happy. She believed that everyone had parents and siblings and grandparents who were nice to each other spent time with each other, talk about problems and supported each other the way the Sawyers did. When she realize it was not the case for all families Kim started to cherish what she had even more than before praying that her classmates parents would work things out and she would be just as happy as Kim was.

'Can I ask you about the whole public school thing?' asked her mom as she sat down on her bed. It should have been embarrassing for Kim to admit, but even at the age fourteen her mom was like her best friend. Everyone told them they were alike and in many ways Kim felt incredibly close with her. She loved all her relatives, but with the others she knew their roles grandparents, father, and Abby although she was wonderful was still so much younger and didn't understand things the way Kim did yet.

Kim sat down on the bed opposite from her, 'We don't have to. I just asked...'

Her mom watched her for moment before she made a grimace, 'Well, okay, but just so you know, you can tell me. I wasn't born and raised into a catholic family like your daddy so whatever it is you don't have to ashamed about it. Feelings are free. You know that.'

Kim nodded before she looked at her, 'Nothing happened if that is what you are thinking. '

Her mom brushed her hair behind her ear, 'Then why don't you want to go to a catholic school anymore.'

Kim was silent for a moment before she admitted like she always did to her mom, 'Well, it's...do you ever feel like we are only surrounded by people we know, our friends?' she asked not even sure if she would be able to explain her feelings.

'Remember when I was little I used to go to an ordinary dance class in town which was the last time I ever interacted with anyone who was from our church. Ever since then I only met people I know. People from our church, and it's not a bad thing. I mean they are our friends and I love my friends but...I feel like...I feel like maybe I would like to meet other people too. Not bad people but I think that just because someone does not go to my school or church he is not a bad person, and I think I want to get to know people like that. I want to see the other side of life. I will go to medicine where there will be all these different folks I want to fit in. I want to know what to expect,' said Kim biting her lip. The truth was she has been feeling lately like every day was the same. Like every day in school and with her family was made by some design. She remembered the time she joined the dance class in town. It was the only time she actually felt like she was surrounded by people who weren't from her church and it wasn't all that terrible. She wanted...she wanted to know the world she lived in, not be isolated for the rest of her life like a princess in the high tower.

Her mom smiled, 'I think I understand. It can feel like you're always with the same people. It can get suffocating especially when you know there is more to life. I just want you to be careful. Not...not everyone is a good person, you know that. And people who don't go to church like us they have sometimes different values. Teens tend to do different things, alcohol and drugs-'

'I wouldn't-'

'But they will and you will be in their world. Believe me when I speak from experience it's way too easy to get suck in. I did when I was your age and it took me a lot to get back on the right track,' said her mom and brushed her hair again, 'But I also know you're not me. And dad and I are nothing like my parents. We know we raised you right and that you will make good choices in life.'

Kim nodded, 'I just want to see the world. The real world.'

'Okay, how about I try to speak with dad on my own now. I'll explain the situation a bit better, okay?' asked her mom, and Kim took her hand, 'Just don't fight over me. It's the last thing I would want.'

Her mom smiled at her and hugged her, 'Don't worry. All will be alright in the end. You know how God works.'

She kissed her head and pulled away, 'Now, eat the cake. It's really good.'

Kim grinned and went to her desk.

 _God, please, please...I don't want to die yet._

* * *

The end of middle school and the whole summer ended. Despite knowing for a while she would be going to a public school it still felt a bit strange when her father parked in front of her new high school on her first day. Usually their dad left earlier so mom was the one who took them everywhere, but today he especially asked Kim if she wouldn't mind going with him. Although he agreed to the whole public school idea, he didn't say much to Kim about it. He immediately just like her went into preparation mode to arrange everything from morning rides to school, to church activities and other things.

Kim was worried that he might have hated the idea secretly and only did so for her and her mom.

She looked back at her dad seeing that his eyes were on the new school as well, 'Are you okay, daddy?'

He looked down at her and smile. Despite that the girls were like a mirror image of their mom, Kim always could tell she had many traits of her dad as well. He might not have been a handsome man like some of the other fathers she knew, he was by far the kindest and caring man she knew.

'Yes, I just wanted to tell you something before you go. You know I wasn't...I wasn't completely aboard with this idea,' he started slowly, 'Your mom convicted me a bit, and I think you can tell. I just want you to know that it had nothing to do with not trusting you. I know you're the most responsible and sweetest girl I know.'

Kim smiled at him for that.

'The thing is. I know that not everyone is like you. I went to Church schools all my life and your mom didn't. We grew up on the same block and the people who went to public school were not the kind of people you wanted to be associated with. Your mom does not talk about it, but there were shootings and violence back then, more than it is now in schools. It wasn't this school of course, but...I just want you to be safe and careful. I'm not saying all public schools are bad or led by gangs, but I need you to understand why I got so worried and defensive over it.'

Kim nodded and hugged him quickly, 'It's okay. I know you're only looking out for us.'

He nodded and brushed her back, 'You're my little sunshine.'

Kim buried her head against his shoulder like she always did when they hugged. Her mom might have been like a sister, the most trusted adviser, but it was her father who was her rock. The most solid and real thing in her life to protect all of them from harm and bad things.

'I'll be fine. I promise,' said Kim determinate to show his dad that things had change. That things would be good even better in public school.

She kissed his cheek one last time before she got out and walked to the school on her own.

As she went inside she noticed a couple of flayers with freshman written on them the first one to caught her eyes was cheerleading.

 _If you're looking for some fun and dancing with awesome girls come to tryouts._

'You interested?' asked an afroamerican with long black braids all over her hair.

Kim smiled at her sweetly, 'Yes, although I might be a bit rusty I haven't dance in a while.'

'It's okay. You can come to check out the practise to see if you would be able to do it,' said the girl and raised her hand, 'I'm Jackie. Team captain, senior.'

'Kim, enthusiastic freshman,' replied the red head.

'Hey, babe, got a new friend?' asked a boy as he walked over to her and Kim noticed the boy behind him, 'Hi Matt.'

'Oh, Kim Sawyer. I didn't know you would be joining Kennedy High,' said the boy, a bit surprised. They went to the same middle school for a couple of years even if Matt was older and knew each other from their teen church group.

'I decided to give it a try. How are you?' she asked and all four started to chat a bit and then help Kim find the right classes. After a couple of weeks Kim joined the cheerleading squad, then she joined the school magazine, her class's future prom and all dance related committees. She started to date Matt. She became school president. She created a reputation for herself. Kim Sawyer, the perfect girl. She was the ultimate perfect girl. She had the grades for it, all the extracurricular activities. She was in every committee and club or group in high school, she was the goodie goodie church girl, with the sweetest boyfriend who was captain of the team. She had the perfect little family. Everyone who knew her parents wanted to have them, always so sweet and supportive and Kim looked genuinely happy with them coming to the games to see her cheer. She had the most adorable little sister and nice grandparents. She was simply the perfect girl in cute dresses with the perfect life. Kim was a catholic. She knew that life wasn't perfect. Only God was. She knew there were bad things in life and anything could happen any day now as a test of her faith. Still, when everyone told her she was perfect and her life was perfect at some point despite it being pride, a sin, to think so, she kind of believed it. For a while between starting to date Matt and her sophomore year, she actually thought she had a good life, and she was grateful for it. It wasn't until sophomore year and a night in December which changed everything...but come to think of it. There were a lot of nights which changed things for her, she just didn't pay attention to them until it was too late.

 _God, please, please...I don't want to die yet._

* * *

Donnie didn't have the same kind of feeling when going on patrols as his brothers. He was a ninja, a warrior like them, but he was firstly and most importantly a scientist, an inventor, a creator. Despite his love for the city and the feeling of duty to protect it, he counted every hour outside before he could return to his workshop and continue with his little projects. He didn't have the unsettling rage Raph had which could only be satisfied with beating up pugs or the honor code and warrior or soldier like will Leo possessed. And he definitely wasn't doing it because he wanted to reconnect somehow with the humans his age like Mikey did. He had a different hunger for knowledge which unfortunately could not be settled with their night patrols, but he shouldn't complain. It was his duty after all and it wasn't like he didn't want to protect the people, he was just being moody.

He and his brothers were in the subway. It was the old subway and not many trains stopped there to begin with so it was a perfect way for them to get out into the city unsuspected. They all slowly started to get out one by one. His turn came next when he noticed someone in the corner of the subway. A woman and her child. He didn't see much only the red hair and a very yellow dress on the little girl.

He wasn't sure what exactly caused him to pause there for a moment. Maybe because when he saw the dress he realized he could add Chromate into his newest research project. He heard Leo whistle at him, a signal to hurry up, and went to leave when he heard a scream.

He stopped and turned spotting a man taking the little girl by the arm while snatching the woman's purse.

Well, it looks like he found trouble.

He jumped behind the pillar closer to them even though if he couldn't hear them he figured it was a mugging.

The woman was raising her hands probably begging him to let her child go while the man was stepping backwards with the little girl.

Donnie frowned as he realized he was going dangerously close to the edge with the girl. The girl suddenly tripped from walking backwards over her own feet and ended up on the tracks. The woman's screamed echoed through the subway.

Now, remember not many trains stopped there, but quite a lot passed there. Donnie jumped without thinking hearing the woman's scream get lost in the sound of the train just as he caught the little girl and literally smashed himself and her into the wall using his own shell to shield her from the possible impact.

His ears were hurting a bit from how close the train passed them, but he easily recovered and stepped back from the girl.

'Whoa,' she said looking at him confused and in total awe.

'Are you okay?' he asked her softly looking over her a bit to see if she was hurt. She had a bleeding knee but apart from that she was okay.

'That was _so_ cool!' she said and jumped a bit not looking like she was in pain at all. He grimaced at her. He was surprised she wasn't afraid but then again maybe to her this was just like a fairytale or like she was imagining it. Kids did like purple dinosaurs so…

'Let's get you to your mom,' he said and went to pick her up before he stopped himself. Before she was someone he had to get off the tracks. It wasn't like he could be too soft with her or hurt her more than a full on impact with a train. Now he wasn't so sure. Now, she was just standing there all small and in a yellow dress like a little doll. All humans were usually shorter than them, but this was a child. She was almost like a cupcake piggy for him.

He smiled a bit, 'Okay, we're going to do this. You're going to turn around and I will get you up and you will jump a bit, okay?'

She nodded and said in that cute childlike voice, 'Okay.'

She quickly turned around and he took her waist easily getting her up like she weight nothing before settling her on the up floor.

'Oh my God, Abby!' he heard a woman's voice. You're okay!'

He backed into the shadows not wanting to interfere or be seen when all of the sudden he heard, 'THANKS MR. TURTLE HERO!'

He stopped for a moment before he chuckled. Well, that was _cute_.

 _Please... God, if you exist please don't let her die down here._

* * *

'So how do you know he was a hero?' asked Kim as she was brushing Abby's hair later that evening. Their whole family was worried when their dad went to police station where her mom was giving a statement after being mugged.

Kim was left with her grandparents. When they finally got home it felt like a huge rock was lifted from the teenager's shoulders. She has never been more grateful to God that he had been so kind and protected her family.

'He was wearing a purple bandana to cover his eyes,' she said while eating the cookie, 'You know like to hide his secret identity?'

'No, everyone has that. Besides he was wearing a turtle costume,' said Kim, 'I think he was keeping it pretty decently.'

'That wasn't a costume,' said Abby and took another cookie.

'Last one,' warned her Kim, 'How come?'

Abby turned around, 'Because when he was talking I saw his tongue, 'she said showing her own tongue at Kim who shook her head and tickled her a bit, 'Not nice, Abby. A lady doesn't just show her tongue at people. It's rude. You know that.'

'Sorry, Kimie, besides he had nice voice. Like Father Dough or daddy. You could tell he was a nice turtle,' said the little girl and turned around.

Kim finished her hair before she hugged her from behind, 'I am just glad you're okay.'

Abby pressed herself against her older sister, 'Me too. Besides now I can tell anyone I have this cool guardian angel.'

Kim smiled and nuzzled her baby sister. She still remembered the day her grandparents finally took her to hospital to see her.

Granny Tina sat down at her on the chair as they gave her to baby to hold she was so small and red a little bit wrinkled, but Kim still thought she was perfect like all babies. However, the one thing which caught her the most was that she had a very different smell. It was hard to explain what exactly did it smell like but Kim never seemed to forget it and always smile as through the memory and smell receptors it reminded her of their childhood.

By now Abby was six and the smell was long gone, but Kim would always keep it somewhere in the back of her mind kept it like a little piece of memory rock at the bottom of her music box.

It was a tiring day and after they all went to bed finally Kim went her laptop. She checked up everything about green turtle like creatures, but she didn't find anything.

Frowning to herself she leaned against her chair before a new message popped up.

 _Hi, are you guys still up? I just want to know how you're doing. If you're asleep I just want you to know, I love you. -Matt_

Kim smiled to herself adorably and replied.

 _I love you too, and no, I'm still up. Abby went to bed. It was a tiring day._

 _Yeah, I get that. I'm glad they're okay. -Matt_

 _Me too._

She went to pray a bit before bed grateful that Abby and her mom were save and thanking their guardian angel for keeping them safe.

 _God, please, please...I don't want to die yet._

* * *

'All I am saying we need some new talents on the team. Sonya transferred and Lucy quit so we are short some girls anyway,' said Kim as she was walking through the hallways of her high school with her fellow girls from the squad at her heels. The sophomore year had barely started and already they lost two very good girls from the team. Kim had to admit their coach was a bit distracted lately which caused the tryouts were a bit of a failure, so Kim was sure making new tryouts would get some new girls to join.

Carmen looked over and Ginny, 'Are you sure? I mean we already had official tryouts and not many people came.'

Kim nodded confident and turned around to look at the two girls, 'Because we didn't advertise it enough. Look, we want to make it to the finals this year. I think this school has a lot of talented girls not to mention it would really help a few out to get a scholarship.'

It wasn't like Kim started Kennedy high with the intention of being the chear-captain or school president or all the other things she achieved. It was just that she loved to work hard and do things and be involved. She was like this in her middle school, but coming to a public school Kim realized just how much different the places were. It wasn't just the lack of praying during the breaks but it was the whole system. It was more competitive and somehow thrilling to win and do things differently. Kim liked being ahead of things, she had this philosophy.

 _Get to the top to make things better for the one who is under you, and that person will make things better for the one who is under him._

This, however, meant that she had to be at the absolute _top_ to make it work, which was exactly what she was doing.

Carmen rolled her eyes. Carmen was always a bit of a…well, Kim didn't like the use to word, but she was a brat. She knew the girl had some troubles at home. She sensed from a few encounters she had with her parents and older brother that Carmen was often in his shadow just filling the place of second child or daughter.

'There you go again with trying to say the world, Kim. Whatever, just no uglies.'

Kim sighed at her responds. It was hard to deal with her friends sometimes. She noticed Jay McClaud walking on her own to the school like every day. Jay didn't even look at her or anyone, and just walked through the hallway blind to the looks people were giving her.

Kim watched her for a moment before she smiled, 'I think we could ask Jay.'

'McClaud?' asked Ginny with her eyes almost comically wide like a deer caught in light.

'Well, she's definitely _not_ ugly,' said Kim and went to her locker. Carmen rushed toward her, 'Yeah, but she's Jay McClaud. She's too stuck up. She thinks she's better than anyone. She won't join the squad. Marcy already tried to get her to join last year. She was so rude. She put her earphones back on and ignored her. Who does that?'

Kim looked at her with a grimace, 'I'm pretty sure Marcy told her she would be a total idiot if she didn't join and offended her by saying she was getting fat.'

Ginny looked upset, 'Well, she should be able to take it. If not how could she be a cheerleader?'

Kim laughed at them, 'Stop joking, girls. We have French.'

She started to walk and the girls quickly followed. This was a tactic Kim invented in freshman whenever her friends started to do things she didn't like and didn't want to argue with them. She made like look like she thought they were joking and left or changed the subject all together. It worked out fine so far. She was never tolerant to any mean behavior like making fun at or gossiping, but sometimes she just didn't feel like being the sole protector of the world. It was exhausting to always be the goods police officer even if she knew it was the right thing, but that was just the trails of her faith.

'Hi Molly,' she greeted the girl who had changed her hair again, this time to pinkish.

The girl looked at her confused before she looked away like usual when she saw Kim. The redhead wondered if she somehow offended Molly some way. The girl always looked like she was upset with her, which Kim never understood since she was always polite with the girl. Maybe she did something to offend her without knowing or maybe it was because the others were mean to her? Maybe she should look into being nicer to her. It didn't feel good to have someone be upset with you.

'Oh, did you saw that hair?'

'Don't say it like that,' said Kim and the girl looked at her startled. Being the head cheerleader meant that Kim had certain power over the girls and even if she didn't use it very often. Still be on top to help the person who is under you…

'She dares to be different, and pink is a nice colour,' said Kim easily seeing how Carmen was taking it in knowing that she had to obey Kim. Feeling that maybe now Carmen will try not to speak ill of Molly in front of her Kim went to her class.

 _God, please, please...I don't want to die yet._

* * *

Kim waited until after gym before she approached the blonde. She remembered just how good Jay was when they were kids in the dance class. She doubted a talent like that could be lost. Kim loved to dance as well and she practice a lot especially when she got on the team. She knew that maybe there were more talented girls then her, but the previous captain Jackie, could see that Kim worked the hardest always bringing good attitude to the practices and events making the girls enjoy themselves as well.

It was close to her graduation that Jackie started to have very little time for the squad so she took Kim to her parents' café house to talk.

Kim was thrilled because she loved being ahead, but also felt like maybe she didn't exactly earned the spot. She knew Sonya and Hillary were better dancers than her, but Jackie explained to her how she could tell Kim was better at leadership and could make the girls get things done.

'Girls are complicated. Cheerleaders are even worse, but when you make them feel good while show them what is it all about you can get them to do things the right way. The captain before me was Christina Morse, but she was suck a…asshole, we basically threw her out. Cheerleading is about dancing and doing something you like not wearing around short uniforms and being superior. When people look at you that is what they see, you show people it's about the dancing not about cheerleader cliché. I think you can get people to be excite about it as well as you are which is why you should be captain, Kim.'

Remembering Jackie's words she put on an enthusiastic face and walked up to the blonde, 'Hi, Jay.'

She already had a flyer prepared in her hand. She caught a glimpse of Molly Jones rolling her eyes at her for some reason, but tried not to look discouraged by it. Through Kim's life she had face people trying to tear her down a lot. Mainly because of her personality. She had a habit of trying to stay positive and think of reasons to do something instead of excuses. It was just a part of nature. People often tried to bring her mood down by saying it wouldn't work or it couldn't work. Church was no different. She was never a fan of the _don't fix it if it isn't broken_ attitude. Just because something isn't broken it doesn't mean it can be improved, right?

'The tryouts for the team are this Friday. We could really use your help.'

She pulled out the flayer and saw how confused and a bit annoyed Jay looked at the flayer and then at her with a look which spoke hostile to every cell in Kim's body. Jay could really seem unwelcoming and unfriendly if she wanted to.

'I really don't see myself as a cheerleader.'

Kim was prepared for this, but still with Jay's cold attitude it was hard to find her confidence, 'Well, I think you would look great in blue.'

She hoped she sounded a bit less scared than she actually felt. Jay was…well, Jay was the most mysterious person Kim ever met. She could be a beauty queen. She was so stunning, but it was like there this invisible wall around her which made it clear she was the beauty in the tower. You could look and admire, but you could never get too close or a dragon will come out and burn you. She always felt so much colder than any other girl she ever met. Kim wondered if it was her own choice or if she just came out that way. Kim knew she came off many times as over joyful and naïve, but she wasn't. She knew world wasn't just puppies and lollipops even if their English teacher always joked she thought so, so maybe Jay wasn't cold inside maybe she just looked that way.

The redhead was more than a bit surprised when Jay took the flyer from her looking almost defeated all of the sudden, 'I will _think_ about it.'

Kim's lips immediately pulled into a bright smile even thought she knew nothing was settled yet. Still it felt like a small victory dance worthy act.

'Okay, I mean. Great. Please do. I think it would be something you would like to do.'

Jay nodded shortly and Kim left her hoping she didn't annoy her too much. She rushed out of the gym surprised to already find Matt there, 'Hi. Waiting long?'

Matt turned around for a moment and Kim noticed Molly's hair disappear behind the corner.

'No, not at all,' he said and hugged her around the waist before he kissed her softly on the lips.

'Hey, I have this thing with the boys later today, so we could have a quick dinner before that?' he asked.

Kim smiled at him, 'I like that. I want to work on the dance for the tryouts anyway.'

'You're my little workaholic aren't you?' asked Matt and kissed the tip of her nose.

She made a grimaced and pulled him a bit away, 'Come on. Let's get going we have so many things to do.'

 _God, please, please...I don't want to die yet._

* * *

Dolores Sawyer was making dinner with Kim's grandma, her and Abby in the kitchen. 'The little blonde haired one or the fat latino one.'

'Granny!' warned her Kim before sighing as she was in the kitchen with them explaining her idea of new tryouts, 'Don't call her that. It's Jay and Nicole. And the blonde one, but Nicole isn't...she has big bones, but now she looks very nice.'

Dolores smirked at her before she nudged the older woman, 'How about you do the potatoes and I do the meat, Annie.'

The old woman waved her hand before she continued to work. She looked annoyed sometimes that mom was home all the time now helping her, but deep down Kim knew she was grateful. There were times when granny forgot to turn on the stove, or put on her shoes before she went to leave the house. When Kim's mom back started to hurt, and the doctor said she would have to stay home for a while, Kim was kind of relieved someone would watch over her grandparents. They were slowly showing their true age.

Dolores turned to Kim, 'I know it would help if someone good joined the squad, but does Jay even want to join? You know it's not okay to force someone.'

'It's not forcing,' said Kim and went to sit down by the table and working on the pie while Abby was making setting the table. 'It's being persuasive.'

'That's what I said when I was trying to get your mom to date me,' joked her dad as he came in with grandpa. He went straight to his wife and kissed her while she grimaced at him, 'True, I only wanted to call the cops two times.'

'Still better than her old man,' mumbled grandpa, 'Your granny's dad took a shotgun at me.'

Granny turned around at that looking offended, 'Did not. He took a register revolver he had for muggers in the shop. And what was he supposed to do?'

'Still a weapon,' pointed out her grandpa.

'Well, what was he supposed to do? Some street boy came into the shop dressed like a begger from down the street and ask his daughter to go out with him in some nonsense language.'

'I was quoting Shakespeare's Romeo and Juliet. Clearly your granny's father didn't know much about education.'

'Romeo and Juliet died,' said granny. Both of them frowned at each other before they waved their hands at each other in annoyance and turned around. Kim and Abby giggled. It was always funny to watch her grandparents act this way. Since she remembered they were this grumpy old couple, but she knew it was an act. They were the kind of couple who still had their little traditions like grandpa still bought grandma flowers completely randomly and grandma still made him his favourite food and knew exactly when and what game of his what playing. They were the kind of couple Kim knew her parents would be one day, the kind of couple Kim dreamed of being a part of one day as well. She hoped her and Matt would be like that as well.

She nodded at Abby to check her phone again as her hands were dirty. Abby looked at the screen and shook her head. Matt still hadn't texted her.

Kim smiled at her sister in a silent thank you while she continued to work.

 _God, please, please...I don't want to die yet._

* * *

Donnie knew that his brothers would probably kill him if they found out, but ever since their first visit to the outside and Mikey getting lost once or twice, he put on trackers on them.

He liked to say it was for their own good, but with time it was hard to lie to himself. He was a bit of a control freak when it came to these things. He didn't make a habit of using them. He just had to made sure his brothers had them on themselves just in case and kept them turned off. It wasn't until Leo got all weird and suspicious looking that he actually turned on his tracker. At first it was nothing out of the ordinary, he had some stops but then always returned to his patrol. Donnie should have stopped at that. It was obvious Leo was still okay if he was doing patrol, right?

Well, Donnie had a bit of privacy issues more like he lacked the understanding of someone else's privacy. He took out the city map of the city and check Leo's stops separating all those which Donnie or one of his brothers where there as well, and those which Donnie knew for sure were just spots Leo took breaks or stayed to be hidden for a bit. After that, all that was left was one spot. Donnie pulled out all online pictures of the building based on the spot Leo was he was on a _fire escape and_ then _inside_ a room.

Donnie frowned and went through the database to check up the people in the flat. Charlotte McClaud 42 and Jay McClaud 16. He watched their driver licence for a moment before he turned off the screen as he heard Mikey come in. He picked up his anti-freezing gun and screwdriver which was what he was working before he started snooping.

'What'cha up to?'

If there was one thing Donnie was well superior to his brothers it was knowledge. Basically anything science or technology related was a Spain village to his brothers. So he started to talk about his newest project which of course was confusing as hell about Mikey. He didn't even bother covering it up too much. Donnie briefly wondered if he should feel bad about how good of a liar he was becoming.

'Okay, anyway, check out the new video of me and L-'

'I already saw it,' said Donnie without taking his eyes from the device.

'Okay? When?' asked Mikey sounding disapointed he wasn't the one to show him. Now Donnie felt a bit bad.

'I check all the videos posted on the site just in case there would have been a good shot of us,' said Donnie before he looked at him, 'Didn't you know?' he asked a bit surprised. He was sure he mentioned it. Or didn't he? Lately with his lack of sleep he was forgetting if he talked about things out loud or only in his mind.

'No, but that's good to know. Uh, anyway, listen, don't you ever get the feeling that something is off with Leo?' asked Mikey slowly.

'Like what?' asked Donnie still not bothering to stop working. He tried to act busy, but he wondered if Mikey knew something too. Donnie had to figure things out with solid evidence, but on more than one occasions he noticed that Mikey could be very intuitive and spot on.

'Like I don't know he's all smiling one minute and then he's all like moody and deep in thoughts kind of like...whoa,' Mikey chuckled, 'Like he's in love, you know, like they show you in romcoms and shit. _Oh Edward. Oh Bella. Oh Jack. Oh Rose. Oh Mr. Spock-_ '

'Please don't start with your Spoke/Kirk fanboying,' said Donnie a bit annoyed. Mikey could talk forever about his tv shows and movies it was getting on Donnie's nerve at times.

Mikey raised his hand, 'All I am saying if the show started in today's word. They would for sure be a couple, but since it was the 60s they couldn't exactly show _manly_ love on screen.'

Donnie was getting a headache again. Last time Mikey started to talk about the Star Trek Donnie felt like smashing his head against the wall after the first hour, 'Mikey~'

'Right, back to big bro Leo, what do you think is up with him?' asked the youngest turtle.

Donnie shrugged his shoulders, 'Who knows? Maybe he's just thinking about things. He hasn't played the guitar for a while. He might just need a new hobby,' said the other brother, knowing that was the worse excuse ever and Mikey could probably tell.

'I still think it's something more serious like he's sick or gay or-'

'What's up with you and homosexuality lately, Mikey?' asked Donnie. He was partly trying to change the topic but on the other hand he was getting curious about why was Mikey bringing it up so often.

'Hey, it's a factor. I mean look there's four of us so there is a big chance one of us swings for the other team. Sausage team.'

Donnie made a disgusting face mainly because even imagining his brothers in such way with someone was nauseating, 'With the way we all drooled over April the first time she came. Doubt that.'

'Oh right, how is she? How's D.C?' asked Mikey quickly losing interested in Leo. Unfortunately Donnie was not happy about the new topic chance since he didn't not want to talk about April anymore or think about her or...just nothing.

'She sounded excited. She should call at the end of the week if you want to talk to her,' said Donnie and smiled a bit but it didn't reach his eyes. Damn it. How could he lie so easily about Leo, but get performance shy when it came to April?

'Sounds great. Did she say what's new with her?'

'Not much. She mostly talked about her work. Her story is looking good. She said she can't wait to come back to NY though,' he returned to his work fully hoping Mikey would take it as a cue and leave him alone.

He really really _really_ did not want to talk about April and her new guy interested.

'Okay, so give me a heads up the next time she calls. I'll go kill time before training,' said Mikey and went to his room.

Donnie's joy was short lived as Raph choice that moment to start playing the drums.

He looked up wondering why was he being punished for. After a couple of moments of just being unproductive Donnie turned on the screen of his computer and looked and Charlotte and Jay McClaud for a moment before he hacked into a few places like the NYPD and some not so public records to make sure they were standard citizens.

 _Please... God, if you exist please don't let her die down here._

* * *

Kim decided to give Jay one more try. She didn't want to be desperate, but she just knew it would be for the best if Jay joined the team. She could help them out a lot and maybe...maybe Jay wouldn't be so lonely. Of course Kim didn't know if Jay was lonely, maybe she preferred to be on her own, but somehow Kim doubted it. Who would want to be alone all the time?

'Jay, hi,' called a redhead and walked toward her with Monica a junior who was also on the squad, 'Hey.'

Jay nodded shortly, 'Hi.'

'So have you thought about joining the squad? It would definitely help us,' said Kim hoping it would convince Jay a bit more.

'You never saw me at tryouts how could you know if I was any good,' said Jay sounding doubtful.

'I remember you from dance classes. Come on, just come to the tryouts, please?' asked the redhead.

Jay sighed. She looked like she wanted to do anything but join the stupid squad, but then her face softened like she remembered something and smirked a bit, 'Okay, I will come to the tryouts.'

Kim chuckled delighted almost finding it hard to believe Jay actually said yes. She was beyond thrilled. She was old enough to know that just because she prayed for something it didn't mean it would happen, but she was still over the moon it did this time. She was sure Jay would be amazing at tryouts.

Despite the fact that Kim was told she was a force of pleasant energy whenever she wanted something, she was honestly surprised she managed to convince Jay to come to the tryouts. She was half expecting the girl to bail at the last minute, but the blonde actually showed up wearing her gym clothes.

She saw how a lot of girls started to whisper something. There would surely be a lot of envy since Jay McClaud was always the girl who got all heads turning. She was just your typical American Beauty Queen. Everyone was insisting she was the prettiest girl in school, and they weren't wrong. Kim wondered if Jay was even aware of all that attention given she always looked so above it all.

'Can we start?' asked the coach a nice older woman, who Kim liked since day one. She was very experienced and won a few competitions. She was going through a bit of a hard time and Kim noticed how sometimes she got all quiet and spaced out a bit because of her divorce, but Kim was feeling very sorry for her.

The tryouts started and Kim was right of course. Jay was a natural. She easily got all the moves and even made it look very much alive and full of energy.

'She's very good,' Kim heard her coach whisper to her and she couldn't help but smile proudly for being right. Jay was fantastic at dancing.

After the announcements Jay got in just like Kim knew she would. Two other girls got on the squad Annie a sophomore and Ava a Freshman who Kim really hoped would make it. She met the girl while she was working for the school magazine. She was a sweet girl, but her parents didn't have enough money. While working a article together she confessed to Kim that she had money issues and was worried she wouldn't get to any colleague. She said she danced in her kid's centre after school, so Kim invited her to the tryouts and she was very good as well.

She rushed toward the girls after the announcements and hugged Ava, 'I'm so happy for you.'

The girl nodded looking still shocked before she went to her friends. Kim was so excited she grabbed Jay's hands without thinking about it, 'I'm so looking forward to have you on the team, Jay.'

'Yeah, hope I won't quit after the first day,' said Jay, but she even smiled a bit which made Kim even more happy.

'No, it will be awesome,' said Kim nodding. She was sure of it.

She didn't even notice Matt until he hugged her over the shoulders standing next to her.

'Of course it will with the best captain in the world,' he said and kissed her forehead.

Kim smiled at him and they both looked Jay. She gave them a look Kim would only describe as being coldly polite.

'Can't wait to see you before the next game, Jay,' said Matt, but Jay didn't look too impressed with him which surprised Kim a bit. Usually people liked Matt just fine. Still, Jay apparently didn't like many people.

'So will I look good in blue?' asked Jay looked back at Kim who smiled, 'Oh, actually there were some changes. We decided to go with black colour this year.'

'Sounds elegant,' said Jay, but Kim wasn't sure if she was joking or not, 'It's very nice. I'm sure you will like it.'

'Hopefully,' said Jay and started to leave. Kim turned around to Matt and hugged him around the neck, 'Jay and Ava made the cut.'

He smiled back at her before he took her around the waist and spun her around a bit making her giggle.

'Of course they did. You're Kim Sawyer. You can smell greatness in people.'

Kim giggled at the praise before smoothing his jumper a bit with her hand.

'Hey, do you think you could maybe come to my place tonight?'

She sighed, 'Can't, I want to get ready for Bio midterm earlier.'

'Babe,' sighed Matt. She knew she was neglecting him a bit lately, but she was working hard on the new choreography, school, at home. It never seems to upset him too much, but he sometimes looked a bit like he was getting slowly tired of it. She hoped he wasn't.

'It's important. Bio is my ticket to med school,' she reminded him and he sighed but smiled, 'Okay, babe, I'll just figure out how to spent time on my own. I will miss you though.'

'Then let's skype later.'

They kissed again before his co-players urged Matt to go with them. Kim was excited feeling butterflies in her stomach as she watched Matt go like she always did. She knew that when he kissed her all way okay between them.

'Gosh, you're so lucky,' said Carmen as she and her were putting their makeup on and fixing themselves after gym and tryouts.

'How come?' asked the girl.

' _Matt_ ,' said the girl adding an edge to her voice which made Kim giggle, 'He's my sweetheart.'

'And a total _babe_ ,' said Carmen while putting on lipstick, 'I mean he's all a girl could want.'

That made Kim pause it brushing her hair a bit, 'Well...thanks.'

'Hey, don't get weird. It's a compliment. I honestly can't find a normal guy for the life of me,' said Carmen quickly.

Kim continued to brush, 'I thought you and Eliot were okay.'

'We're okay, but he's kind of a dick. Great in bed, but he gets like super into sports and totally ignores me.'

'Not to mention he fucks freshman behind your back,' said a new voice from inside the stall and Nicole Diaz walked out of it. Carmen once described her looking like a celebrate who was in and out of rehab. Even if Kim didn't like to think mean things, it seemed kind of fitting now.

Carmen looked at Kim offended before she rolled her eyes at Nicole who went to stand next to her and fix her makeup.

Kim started to brush her hair faster. The last thing she wanted was to be in Nicole's shot when she was clearly having a bad day.

'Matt on the other hand total _babe_ ,' said Nicole mimicking Carman's voice and straightened looking at Kim ignoring Carmen.

Kim nodded and gave her a very awkward smile, 'Thanks.'

'No, I mean it. Some guys would have already dump your ass if you were giving them blue balls the way you're giving them to Matt, but not him.'

Kim opened her mouth too stunned to say anything which was when Carmen stood up for her, 'Why don't you go suck David's dick, Diaz?!'

Nicole smirked at her, 'Maybe I will. You should think about doing that too if you don't want that hottie of yours to find someone else for play dates.'

Kim didn't even know what to say so she just watched Nicole leave the room.

Carmen rolled her eyes, 'Please don't listen to her. She's total trash not to mention a whore. She probably just took another shot of something fucked up. Believe me she will be kissing your ass at her next party in no time.'

Kim shook her head, 'I don't, but please don't say that-'

'Oh, it's true. Everyone knows she's one of the Whorish girls of Kennedy High.'

'The what?' asked Kim concerned and very much disgusted.

Carmen shook her head, 'It's this rumour that Nicole, Jill, Molly Jones and a few other girls hook up after school for money.'

'That's a terrible thing to say. That's slander,' said Kim looking very shocked.

Carmen shrugged her shoulders, 'It's probably true anyway. I went to middle school with Jones. She's a total psycho.'

The girl went to leave, 'You coming?'

Kim took her bag with a very nauseating feeling inside her stomach. Sometimes she wondered if coming to a public school wasn't a mistake.

 _God, please, please...I don't want to die yet._

* * *

When Leo came into his workshop Donnie was full on in the process of his new invention. If he did it right it would be a very useful smoke bomb in case they ever needed one.

It wasn't uncommon that Leo showed up at his little palace of peace. Usually it was just for the daily brother time, where he asked Donnie what he was doing he explain it to him, Leo acted like he knew what he was talking about and then leave. Not that Donnie minded it. Sometimes it was very helpful to talk things out loud with Leo. It often helped him get a new view on his projects. Still, now that Donnie knew Leo's little secret it seemed like every move Leo made and all he said was somehow related to it.

'Something on your mind, Leo?' asked Donnie not even bothering to raise his eyes from the microscope.

'Not much, what about you?' asked his brother and walked closer. Donnie had to admit. Despite probably having a lot on his mind, Leo was a decent enough liar. He was acting weirder like Mikey said and noticed, but when he was talking with them it was hard to see something wrong if it wasn't for the fact that Donnie already knew what was wrong.

'I am working on a new smoke bomb,' said the younger turtle.

'Is that what we need?' asked Leo.

'Hopefully, not.'

They chatted a little bit before Leo went to leave. It wasn't like chit chat. It was like both of them knew that the other was talking about something else or implying something else, but none of them actually voice it.

Donnie's mind drifted back to the license picture of Jay McClaud.

'If you want to talk about it,' said Donnie suddenly which caused Leo to stop in track, 'I'm here. I won't judge.'

'Why do you think there is something to talk about?' asked Leo. He didn't sound upset or shocked just nervously calm.

Donnie shrugged his shoulders, 'I notice things. I can tell something's off with you lately...it's not a bad thing actually. You look relaxed and yet stressed out. We're not kids anymore Leo so just tell us.' He hoped he had given his brother some weight for his decision making. He didn't think it was his place to say anything, but he should have at least support Leo in his decision. Whatever would be the outcome.

'Why do you think?' asked Leo carefully.

'I don't know,' he shrugged his shoulder and decided to poke it a bit, 'Mikey thinks you're in love.'

'What?' asked Leo startled.

'You're happy yet stressed out like how media shows a person in love,' explained Donnie and analyzed his face for a moment before he looked back down to the microscope giving him some time to compose himself. He wasn't that mean.

'What do you think?'

'I don't know,' lied Donnie. Maybe he was a good liar as well.

'But I'm sure you will tell us when you can,' he spoke honestly. Leo left after a while not giving anything away.

Donnie raised his head from the microscope and thought about the whole situation. He understood it maybe better than anyone. Leo probably met this girl somewhere or she met him. Given that he knew Leo was no stalker and since he might have checked the girl's messages now to make sure she wasn't working for anyone he knew she saw Leo and still wanted to spent time with him. This meant that they were meeting which meant that Leo a teenage turtle was spending time with a pretty human teenage girl. Of course it led to hormones and feelings and other things it was biological. Still, Leo was their rock. He was the oldest and although they all had experiences which they kept inside fearing it would cause pain to the others, he knew Leo would carry that weight on his shoulders until the day he died just so he wouldn't tell them he was hurting. Kind of like him, himself.

Ever since Donnie was a kid, he was always looking up to Leo. He was the oldest and always did justice to his nick name _fearless_. He never showed fear or that he was giving up. He always encourage all of them to try and to see that there was always a way to try something else and succeeded.

Donnie was worried. He was worried Leo would be going over the same things, he himself went with...April. He was worried it would break something in Leo. It was cause Leo to know defeat. He was almost tempted to go to his brother right now and confessed what happened between him and their human friend, but fear of Leo not understanding of him thinking Donnie was crazy or of pitying him froze the turtle. He remained sitting on his chair feeling like a coward before he took the microscope again and continued to work.

Shaking his head and returned to work. He would tell him when he was ready.

 _Please... God, if you exist please don't let her die down here._

* * *

A.N: Hey, everyone. Sorry it took so long to update but I was feeling really sick and then I had to catchup on all my other things like work and family. Anyway, here is the new chapter I hope you like it. Introducing a new character is always filled with expectations, hopes and fears. I think I do not need to say Kim is different than the rest. I hope you will like her and accept her. I think I will have an new update on the 27th maybe sooner but no promises.

I would like to wish all of you Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year. Lots of presents, laughter, peace, relaxation and of course good quality time with the family.


	14. The Perfect Girl 02

**The Perfect Girl**

* * *

 _If life can remove someone you never dreamed of losing, it can replace them with someone you never dreamt of having – Anonym_

* * *

Donnie scratched the back of his head in annoyance. It was a nervous tick. Many people could have motor or vocal tics or twitches. Many people didn't even know about them. It could be simple things like blinking or even shrugging their shoulders.

Scratching the back of his head as if he was having a rash started whenever he was dealing with something he couldn't crack or solve usually it had something to do with his projects or inventions. Right now, however, the matter was far worse. It was bad really _really_ bad.

A week ago he used to think Leo spending time with some blonde teenage girl was bad. Now? He didn't even care. All he cared about was that Mikey was chatting with another girl. Oh, but she was no ordinary girl. No, sir. From all the people in the whole world Mikey could start to chat he had to pick the girl who was the creator of Vigilante's website. _Their_ website. Well, if to be accurate it was a website _about_ them as it was _her_ website...but who cared about accuracy when Mikey was not knowing feeding this girl with information about them? About their family. About who they _really_ were?

Donnie sighed and felt like literally he was in front of the worst puzzle of his life.

He closed his eyes and went into his mind palace to return to the facts. Stating facts always helped him reason the situation.

Fact no. 1: Vigilantes of New York was a website about them.

Fact no. 2: The website was in possession of Molly Jones.

Fact no 3: Molly Jones was Mo or FuryMachine344, Mikey's friend from fortnite (What kind of girls gives herself a name like that?)

Donnie shook his head. That was not important even if a little voice in the back of his mind which sounded like Mikey said _the kind which plays fortnite and has a website about vigilantes._

Back to the task in hand.

Fact no 4: Mikey was giving the girl information about them.

Fact no 5: The information was useless to the girl as they did not reveal anything.

Fact no 6: The girl didn't know who Mikey was either.

Donnie was sure of that as he spent the whole yesterday, almost to the point that Leo had to drag him to patrol, reading Mikey and Mo's conversations. To answer your question, no he was didn't care he absolutely violate not only the privacy of a potential treat but also his brother. At this point he had half the mind tell everything to Master Splinter.

He forced his hand down to stop from scratching. He would start bleeding from his scalp soon if he continued.

Fact no 7: Mikey and Mo were friends.

Fact no 8: Mikey didn't even know Mo was a girl.

Fact no 9: Mikey cared for Mo very much.

Donnie let out an annoyed sighed and opened his eyes. That was the whole issue wasn't it? If Mikey wasn't invested in Mo, Donnie wouldn't care. He would just go and tell him all of this, but because he was sure Mikey was either crushing on the girl without knowing or just really care for her. It wasn't like the girl purposely found him. It was such a universal coincidence Donnie didn't trust it one bit. This was ridiculous. The world has 7,7 billion people and Mikey ends up befriending the one who is writing about them.

Fact no 10: Mo never released anything which would jeopardize their secret and deleted any comment which spoke about...who they really were.

Donnie was sure Mo had to know that they were turtles. It was impossible for people not to mention it _several_ times, but the girl purposely choice not to add it anywhere. Whether she had a hidden goal, or she admired them so much, she kept their secret safe, Donnie had to give her credit for that.

Fact no 11: At the moment Mikey had no intention of meeting or revealing himself to Mo.

Donnie crossed his arms and looked at his computer again. He didn't know what to do. He didn't want to tell Mikey. If he found out, Donnie had this feeling he would shut himself out from Mo. He would...he would rather suffer not being in contact with Mo than to somehow put their secret at risk.

Both he and Mikey experienced what is it like to meet with humans who didn't accept them. Despite the fact that Mikey also met with a girl who didn't scream at him in the alley and he helped a child who actually thought he was cool, they both knew what would happen if people acted on their basic instinct and took them as treats.

However, Mikey wasn't like him. He was an optimist. From all of his brothers, Mikey was the only one who soling believed that things would work out just right in the end for them. He saw it from the time April came into their lives. Despite the rejection when they were kids, Mikey genuinely wanted to befriend April like a careless child simply knowing in his heart he would be accepted. Donnie was sure Mikey still believed that people would accept them one day. He wasn't bitter about it like the rest of them.

For a moment Donnie's mind drifted to that horrible day when he and Mikey wondered off to scan the sewer and had their first encounter with humans.

He quickly shook the nightmarish memory away. Mikey might have acted like a foolish carefree child, but the truth was he and Donnie were probably the only ones who experienced what it meant to be rejected by the humans. Yet, Mikey didn't let the experience destroy his chance in a future where he could have human friends.

Donnie clenched his hands into fists as he felt the shook remembering all of it and right after that seeing April's face when she told him she loved him like a _brother_.

'Damn it, what's the matter with you?' he asked himself. He had to clear his head. This was becoming too much. His inventions, Leo's secret girlfriend, April, the memories from that day, now Mikey's friend. He was looking his cool.

'Must be something serious if you're cursing,' spoke Raph suddenly at the door to the workshop.

Donnie looked at him for a moment before he gave him a small smile and shook his head, 'It's nothing.'

'Does it have something to do with why Leo is so weird lately?' asked Raph testing the waters. Donnie should have know someone would come to get info on Leo's odd behaviour.

'Err, no, it's just something...I can't figure out yet,' said Donnie and sighed again. It wasn't like he could tell Raph about it while he still didn't know what he will do about it.

Raph came inside. Despite his anger issues Raph could be sometimes easiest to talk to. Unlike Leo was trying to analyze things, or Mikey who just wanted to make you feel better, Raph always came up with the simplest solution, emotionless.

'Want to spare a bit?'

Donnie looked up at him again. He knew this was Raph's way of help. Sparing meant he would think of something else as well as he would vent a bit.

He almost smirked, 'Careful, bro. I might think you care.'

'Bite me. You coming or what?' he asked already walking away, but Donnie knew he was right. He followed him outside to their training area on the mat where they usually spare. It was pointless really since more times than not they threw each other to the opposite sides of their _gym_.

They started. Raph might have been a dick and hothead at times, but when he wasn't upset, he was a pretty decent opponent and training with him was actually fun and relaxing.

At the end they were panting calling it a tie so they wouldn't have to argue about it. It helped him not to think about Mikey and Mo or Leo and Jay, or April or anything really and just stay in focus for Raph's next move. Clearing his mind helped him a lot.

'That was a good kick at the end,' said Raph and Donnie looked at him, 'You don't have to butter me up. The sparing was already enough.'

Raph chuckled and took a bottle of water from his hand drinking it. They were sitting next to the mat resting from the match.

'Do you know what's up fearless's ass lately?' asked Raph after a while.

'Yes,' admitted Donnie. He wasn't sure why. Raph could just start acting like an annoying asshole now.

Raph shot his look and Donnie looked over at him.

'Are you gonna tell me?'

'No.'

'Great. Thanks for that Don,' mumbled Raph, but it sounded a bit defeated than actually upset 'It's affecting him and the team. He's fucking things up.'

'He's not _fucking_ up anything, Raph. He's business like always on patrols. What he's doing in his spare time is up to him,' said Donnie.

'Bullshit. We're brothers. We're all we got. He needs to be honest with us. If he's in some mess, we have the right to know,' said Raph getting annoyed although Donnie could tell he was mostly worried. Despite their bricking Raph cared for Leo and he would destroy anything which would be hurting their brother, but how could Raph possibly help Leo when the problem was his heart? How could anyone help Leo if he wasn't saying anything? He wasn't saying anything either, but Donnie made that call the moment he returned home the night April left for D.C.

'I'm sure he will tell us soon. He was never good at keeping secrets from us,' said Donnie, 'His conscious won't let him.'

'What if it will be too late? What then?' asked Raph looking Donnie dead in the eyes.

What if he will stay quiet about Mo and then it will be too late too? What if by staying silent he will screw things even more and cause Mikey more pain? What if he is the one spilling slowly their secret and putting them all in danger. He is so desperate to protect them all, he crossed every privacy boundary, yet he is not doing anything with the information, is he now?

'Then we will find a way to deal with it when the time comes,' he said finally.

He will continue to check up on Mikey and Mo and Jay to be sure, but at the moment he will keep quiet about it. He didn't have much of a choice.

'Oh man, you guys have to listen to this. Mo is like my spiritual animal or something. Check this _one_ ,' said Mikey jumping down from the hall to his room in front of them on the mat. With his typical child delight he then processed to tell them about the newest dad joke Mo found for him.

Raph let out an annoyed sound, 'Mikey, I am telling you this _one_ more time. Quit it with the jokes. If I hear one more I swear to God, I will knock you out good!'

'Oh, Raphie, come on. You know you secretly love them~'

For now he will let Mikey have his friend.

 _Please...God, if you exist, please, don't let her die here._

* * *

Donnie wondered if maybe he wasn't turning into a sociopath without noticing. Ever since he found out about Jay, he was positive this would end only one way, with a fight. It would be the natural ending to the chain reaction caused by one of them interacting with a teenage human girl. How could this not ended badly with Raph being the hothead he was and Leo stubbornly defending his ground not admitting to Raph he did anything wrong? So he knew how this would end and he still let it happen. Wasn't that what a sociopath would do?

When he came out of his workshop, Raph and Master Splinter were already sitting on the couch in the living room area where Master watched all his TV shows while Leo was standing in front of them. Mikey was just getting there and it was clear the whole scene shouted _family meeting_. For a brief moment, Donnie wondered if he would have gotten away with returning to his workshop, but when Leo waved at him to come already, he knew it was too late.

 _Maybe I should have just minded my own business. How the hell will I pull of not knowing about this?_

Yeah, too late for that bright idea.

Donnie sat down next to Mikey who was playing on his old gameboy. Where the hell did he dug that was beyond Donnie, but since Mikey was a turtle/pig he probably just found it in the piles of garbage he has in his room.

Leo started to talk. He immediately got the point and finished. There was no speech or justification he basically just said there was a girl he was seeing and that was all.

Donnie sighed and elbowed Mikey who obviously did not listen to a words Leo just said.

It wasn't until Raph ask him to repeat that Mikey started to mumble to himself like a maniac that he was right and Leo was in love.

He figured you can't lie if you're silent so that was exactly what Donnie did. He stayed silent and watched as Leo and Raph argued in front of him. Of course this wasn't anything new to him. He honestly thought about just leaving to his workshop and come when they would be done until Raph didn't look at Master Splinter, who just got up, with _that_ look.

It was one look of fury from Raph which made bother Mikey and him quick on their feet standing between them.

Now, it wasn't like Raph ever hurt their sensei. He was a hothead and sure he from time to time lost his temper on them, but their sensei, was their beloved father. He would _never_ dare to try and hurt him, even if Master Splinter would most likely beat Raph in the end even the thought of him _trying_ to attack him was terribly sickening and unimaginable.

Donnie felt guilty all of a sudden. Is this what having a relationship with a human leads to? Violence and hate? If so what would be the point? Why bother bring in outsiders when it would cause harm to the inner circle. They were brothers, best friends, they were family and a team. They were all they had for so long. Sure, they were growing now and there were things they wanted from other people not just each other, but was it worth it if they would argue and hurt each other?

Raph stormed out of the lair like a maniac that he was. Donnie would make sure his tracker was on just in case he decided to not return for the day.

Mikey showed Leo immediately his support and Donnie had half a mind to point out that _of course you did when you have a girl of your own_ , but he bit his tongue. If he didn't spill Leo's secret how could he Mikey's? Even if his younger brother didn't even know there was a secret?

Instead the second oldest look at Leo and gave him a small smile. What was done was done and hopefully, Raph would get over it and give them all a break soon, 'As long as you're happy...and she's not a treat.' She might not have been with the Foot or Purple Dragons, but she already caused trouble to their little family balance.

'She's not,' assured him Leo, but it didn't convince Donnie.

He spent the next couple of hours working on his latest inventions while spying on Raph and making sure Mikey didn't spill anything important to his friend, Mo. Nothing out of the ordinary. He decided to work in his room today, as his brothers were starting to randomly show up in his workshop which made him paranoid they would notice something.

When Raph finally did show up, Donnie almost wished he didn't as he started to punch into his boxing bag. When something hit the wall right next to his room really loud bang.

'Damn it, Ralph, knock it off!' shouted the turtle scratching the back of his head annoyed with his brother.

Based on the fact that the banging stopped Raph must have broke the boxing bag. Thank heavens. He worked for a while until Leo didn't show up, 'Movie time?'

Donnie shook his head, 'No thanks.'

'Donnie,' said Leo giving him a look, 'Mikey is getting Raph. I really need all the support I can get.'

He chuckled at him, 'Okay, I hope it will not be another terrible one like the one with ducks.'

'No, Don, I picked that one,' said Leo and gave him another look to which Donnie grimaced, 'Sorry, but it was a very weird movie, Leo. You should talk to someone about that.'

He went to shove him, but Donnie moved away, the both of them chuckled.

As they walked down slowly, Leo asked, 'You knew, didn't you?'

He didn't have to explain what was it that he thought Donnie knew.

'I had a hunch,' admitted Donnie.

Leo nodded, 'Well, thank you for not telling anyone. I'm guessing when Mikey told you he thought I was in...l-love it must have been a bit hard not to tell him.'

Donnie shrugged his shoulders, 'It wasn't. It was not my secret to tell. If it was the other way around you wouldn't tell it either.'

Leo stopped and looked at him, 'You're right, Donnie. I wouldn't.'

That caused Donnie to pause a bit as well and turn around to look at Leo. Maybe he wasn't as good of a liar as he liked to think he was.

Donnie shrugged his shoulder again, 'Of course.'

'No, Donnie, I mean it, but...,' Leo looked away for a moment, 'Even if Raph got pissed. It was worth it. It felt better to admit it. To admit what was going on me. Maybe if...maybe it would help to admit things for you too,' he said careful and looked up at Donnie.

The other turtle grimaced, 'Thanks, Leo, but I don't think so. Not everyone has a happy end he wants to share.'

Leo put his hand on his shoulder suddenly and squeezed it, 'If...if you will feel like it, I'm here.'

Donnie smiled immediately, 'I know, and for the record _that_ was never my issue.'

Leo returned the smile and they continued to the living room area.

It was strange as all four of them went to the living room area and sat down with popcorn and candy both Leo and Raph as far as possible from each other. The tension was very visible and uncomfortable, luckily the movie started and got to an interesting point so Donnie managed to focus on it and forget about his brothers, Jay, or his involvement in the whole thing.

The movie was very good in the end, as they walked to their rooms Leo and Raph stayed a bit behind to talk. It looked like maybe the whole Jay thing wouldn't be so problematic as Donnie feared. He hoped that would be the case.

 _Please...God, if you exist, please, don't let her die here._

* * *

Kim Sawyer checked her English essay one more time before she went to erase the last paragraph and wrote a new one as she wasn't feeling fully satisfied with it. As she was working on her essay she wondered about what Mrs. Graham told her about the magazine. They could use someone new to write the articles.

Her mind drifted to their last essay and how much of a gifted writer Molly Jones was. Maybe she would be interested in joining the magazine. It wouldn't hurt to ask her, maybe she wouldn't be so upset about her.

 _I hope you're not angry because of today. My parents didn't want to let me out because of the bad math grade._

Kim sighed and bit her nail before she caught herself and stopped. It was a disgusting habit. She was just being ridiculous.

'Kimie?' asked a soft voice behind her.

The teen turned around and she smiled, 'Hey, pumpkin, what's up? You should be in bed.'

'I can't sleep. My tummy hurts,' said the six year old as she walked into her sister's room wearing her pink bunny PJs she just got for her birthday. She looked so sleepy.

Kim leaned against her chair, 'Does that have something to do with your second piece of cake?'

'Grandma said she doesn't want it. It's not nice to let good food go to waste,' said her baby sister and the redhead chuckled before she stood up.

'Maybe I can sleep with you tonight?' asked Abby testing.

'You know daddy wants you to sleep on your from now one,' reminded her Kim.

'Just tonight Kimie, please,' pleased the little girl. Kim rolled her eyes playfully before she stood up, 'How about I put you to bed and wait until you fall asleep?' she tried to bargain.

'Deal!' said the little girl and spun around in joy making Kim giggle.

She took Abby's hand and led her back to her room.

The night lamp was still on. It was Kim's old one from when she was little. She remembered the teddy bear shaped lamp as her oldest possession.

 _Now, Kimie, I'm going to turn on the teddy lamp and as long as it shines nothing bad is going to come hurt you, okay?_

 _Promise?_

He always told her God was watching over her so the lamp was only for her to see it as well as believe it.

 _God, please, please...I don't want to die yet._

* * *

A couple of days later Matt was lying on Kim's bed looking up at her roof while she was going through her closet. She had plenty of clothes there. She couldn't complain about not having anything to wear like she often witness in the teenage movies. She just didn't know what to wear.

'Go naked. I wouldn't mind.'

Kim chuckled and blushed as she continued to scatter through the closet. She found a lot of things she wouldn't wear anymore. It looked like she could fix a bag for charity soon again.

'Thank you, but I think I would. What about this one?' she asked and showed him her long skirt.

'I'm no fashion guru, but I'm pretty sure that one is out, babe.'

Kim sighed and put the skirt back in. Definitely prepare a bag.

'You know you don't have to go if you want to, right? People know you don't go to many parties, babe,' said Matt suddenly. He probably thought finding clothes to the party were her only issue, well, it was not entirely.

Kim paused in her search for a moment before she forced a smile, 'I-I know, but I feel like I want to go today. I think I worked hard and earned a bit of break.'

'Whoa, Kim Sawyer admitting she worked hard enough. What happened?' joked Matt.

'I said I worked hard. Not hard _enough_ ,' corrected him Kim before she continued to look. The true was...the true was too terrible to admit. Nicole's words got to Kim. She knew Matt. She knew he was a good person, who wouldn't force her into anything she wasn't ready for, but he was a guy. Despite Nicole's cruelty. There was more truth to it than Kim would like to admit.

Matt was a sweetheart, but Kim really was denying him any intimacy, and as Nicole said if it was some other guy he would surely break up with her.

Kim wasn't sure what had gotten into her. It wasn't like Matt would each on her. He was a good guy and they loved each other. Yet the way Carmen and Nicole spoke about him...Since before they started dating Kim saw how girls looked at Matt. Many girls thought he was handsome and amazing because he really was. He was the nicest guy imaginable. He cared for people and showed devotion and loyalty she didn't see in many people before. He was just...the good guy. She was incredibly flattered when he started to ask her out. She has been with a few guys before, but Matt was...different. When they first went to talk after church on a nearby bench it was like the whole world was gray before and Matt was the only light or colour left. It was like he was the centre of everything. Her everything.

Girls were always interested in him, but they were never this vocal about it as Carmen and Nicole. The thought of Matt alone in a party with Nicole was very unsettling for the redhead.

'Okay, I think I got it,' she said and came out with a sweater and jeans.

Matt looked at them and laughed, 'Oh Kim, you're one of a kind.'

The girl would have defended the outfit, but Abby came into the room, 'Kimie? Hi, Matty.'

'Hi Abby,' said the boy and the two grinned at each other.

Kim put the clothes on the bed and went to her sister, 'What is it pumpkin?'

'Daddy wants to talk to you before you go,' said Abby and Kim smiled at her even if she felt uneasy about it. She already spoke with her mom about the party so she was supposed to ease her dad into it. Of course she didn't tell her mom what Nicole said. She was too embarrassed to talk about it.

'Okay. I'll be back soon,' said Kim and Matt nodded already pulling out his phone.

She took Abby's hand and the two walked to her parents' bedroom.

'Why don't you go make Matt some company while I talk to daddy?'

Abby sighed, 'Do I have to?'

Kim looked surprised. Abby used to love play with Matt. She was always very fond of new people and she liked spending time in Kim's room whenever her friends came over. It made her feel like she was older.

'What's wrong? You like spending time with Matt.'

'I did, but when you're not around he is only on his phone and that is boring,' said Abby, 'Can't I rather go play to my room or with granny?'

Kim blinked confused by the new information. She never realized how much time Matt was on his phone. She was also surprised to find out he wasn't spending time with Abby when Kim wasn't around.

'Of course, pumpkin. Don't worry about it,' said Kim and smiled at her before she went inside.

'You wanted to talk, daddy?' she asked. Suddenly the whole party wasn't the most worrisome thing on her mind.

'Yes, your mom said you and Matt would like to go to party together today,' said her dad and gave her a look, 'Did you ask her to butter me up?'

Kim smiled a bit, 'Did it work?'

'Kimie,' sighed her dad.

Kim sighed, 'It's not a big deal. I will drive and you know I will not be underage drinking. You can see what I will be wearing if you are worried.'

Her dad smiled at her, 'Darling, it's not you who I am worried about. It's the others. I know you will be on your best behaviour, but other people might not.'

'Daddy, Matt will be there too.'

'Yes, and so will his sport buddies,' said her dad.

Kim felt like this would be going nowhere so she nodded, 'Just tell me if I can go or not. I can promise you nothing with happen, but you will still be worried.'

Her dad watched her for a moment before he took her hand, 'You know it's only because I love you.'

Kim smiled t him, 'I know, dad, and I don't blame you, but today I really want to go.'

'Why is today so much different than other days?'

'Before going to a public high school I told you I want to see what the real world was about. I want the full experience even if I will just be watching it. I want to know who and how people are at parties. I won't be even that long. You can give me curfew.'

'Of course, I am giving you a curfew, I have to maintain my status as the strict catholic father,' he said and the two of them smiled at each other before he let her hand go, 'Okay, you can go, but text me when you get there and before you will leave. No drinking or drugs or anything like that. If you anything...and I mean anything bad happening you will immediately call the police I am not kidding.'

Kim nodded and hugged him, 'Thank you, daddy, I promise you won't be disappointed with me.'

'I could never be disappointed with you Kim. You're the best person I know.'

He gave him a tender smile and nodded at her that she could leave.

She almost skipped to her room where she found Matt on the bed with his phone still in his hand. Her good mood faded away as she remembered what Abby told her.

'Did Abby come back?'

'Hm?' he asked looking surprised like he was completely focused on whatever he was doing on his phone.

'Sorry, come here and look at the new article the NYV posted.'

Kim smiled realizing he was reading articles all this time and not texting, 'Oh, are they good.'

'Yes, new story about them stopping a store from getting burn down. They're so amazing. They should get a medal,' he said his eyes back on his phone. Kim knew he was very much into the website and the stories. He got her hooked as well. By now everyone knew about the four heroes who were protecting the streets of New York. A Sunday a couple of months back Father Dough even spoke about how they found three men who tried to rob the Church tied to the near tree claiming they were stopped by some men in turtle consumes.

'Listen to this,' said Matt before he started to read her the article. Matt had a nice storytelling voice when he wanted to.

Kim would read the article herself later. She liked how well the pieces were written. It was so easy to picture the whole scene and what was happening like she was actually there. She wondered if the person behind the site was familiar with the vigilantes or just wrote about them out of duty to pay respect to the people who were keeping the city safe.

Still, it was good to have people like them and people who wrote about them.

 _God, please, please...I don't want to die yet._

* * *

Matt opened the door for Kim and she walked inside. She was a strange to Nicole Diaz's house unlike Matt who seemed to know exactly where to go and what to do.

She looked around. They left the house earlier, but ended up going for pizza since apparently it was uncool to come early to a party. There were a lot of people from her school. People who were either dancing, talking or drunk or something in between.

'KIM! YOU'RE HERE!' she heard from her left and was surprised when suddenly Ginny attacked her in a bear hug spilling something from her cup in the process.

'I can't believe you're here!' said the girl almost shouting.

Kim shot her an awkward look and slowly untangled herself from her, 'Yup, I'm here and I can hear you. No need to shout.'

Matt chuckled looking very amused by the situation while Kim peeked to the living room where she spotted Nicole and Jay talking to each other and smiling.

This genuinely surprised her as she didn't even know Jay and Nicole spoke with each other.

'Hey, let's say _hi_ to the host?' asked Matt trying push Kim further into the house.

The read head nodded and started to walk over letting go of Ginny's hand, but the girl followed her anyway. Kim didn't fail to notice that she was wearing a very short skirt and her strip was coming lose on her shoulder.

She couldn't help, but turn around and fix it to which Ginny gave her a bit unfocused look of gratitude.

They walked to Nicole and Jay who stopped talking for a bit. Seeing Nicole in such an amazing looking dress and with her hair and makeup made Kim feel bad that she only went in jeans and a sweater.

Nicole and Jay looked so pretty today even if Nicole had a very short dress. Her mind drifted back to Nicole's words in the restroom.

'God, Nicole, this party is awesome as always,' said Kim feeling a bit like a hypocrite since she put on a fake smile and everything. She didn't…she didn't want to show Nicole she got to her with her words.

However, when she felt Matt hugged her from behind, she felt all the support she needed. She was being crazy. Matt and her love each other with or without Nicole Diaz wearing a short skirt. They were good together and trusted each other. Why would she think Nicole could seal him from her? Why would she think Matt would leave her for something so pointless as her not giving him sex? How could she be so foolish and suspicious of him? She felt so guilty for giving into stupid doubts like that. Matt would never cheat on her.

He kissed her temple softly just as the black haired girl winked at her and handed her boyfriend a beer cane.

Kim knew Matt drank from time to time. She never witnessed it though.

She smiled at him.

'Thanks, Nicole.'

Kim looked over rather at Jay who was calmly looking at the two. Over the past few weeks they had spent a lot of time together on trainings and matches. Kim would like to think they were _slowly_ becoming friends. Maybe someday.

'Jay, you look so pretty,' said Kim nodding at her with a smile.

Jay smiled at her a bit, 'Thank you, Kim. You look nice too.'

'Oh my God, Kim, you're here,' said Carmen surprised as she and a couple of girls came to talk with her. Suddenly she felt like the whole squad was there and she felt weird. Wasn't it bad that most of her girls went to parties, but their captain never did?

Kim went to being her cheerful self. She was happy to be there with the girls. Strangely with them there she didn't feel like such an alien to be at the party.

'So what are you drinking?' asked Kitty as she sipped her cane a bit.

Kim shook her head, 'Oh, I don't drink. I'm driving.' It wasn't just that of course. Even if Kim wasn't driving there was no way in hell she would drink. Call her old fashioned but she really did want to do this right and according to laws, God's and human ones.

'Hey, Nicole has some coke in the back of the kitchen. Want some?' asked Jay suddenly and Kim nodded.

'Come on,' nodded the blonde and Kim followed her the cheerleaders slowly parting their ways to different corners and rooms of the house.

Kim followed closely behind Jay, 'Nicole has a nice house. I never was inside before.'

'This is her dad's house. She also has an apartment on Upper East Side with her mom,' said Jay and bended down to dig some coke from under the kitchen counter.

Someone catwhistled and Kim turned around with wide us looking at some boys who were laughing and pointing at Jay's behind. The blonde very slowly rose and turned to look at them.

'You got something to say to me?' her voice was cold like ice making even Kim scared.

One boy stopped laughing looking actually ashamed while the other just smirked, 'We were just admiring the view.'

Kim watched as Jay nodded at him, 'Well, careful. People tend to get hurt while sightseeing.'

Now even the second boy looked not amused and nodded at the other one to leave.

Kim watched the exchange in awe. Jay was such a badass sometimes.

'Here,' said the blonde, her voice back to normal as she handed the other girl the coke. She opened one as well and Kim smiled, 'Also driving?'

'No, I'm sleeping in Nicole's. I just don't drink,' said Jay and shrugged her shoulders, 'I don't really see the point and with these assholes I always need to be sharp so.'

Kim watched her a bit surprised by this. She knew Jay was a pretty girl who got a lot of male attention, she never realized this attention was bad like this. She never thought Jay had to be afraid to have fun or lose enough because of it. It wasn't like Kim judged her peers when they drank underage. (Well, she did but only a little bit.) But for Jay not to drink so she would feel safer around them? It sounded so awful.

'So why did you decided to come, Kim?' asked Jay her phone vibrating.

Kim shrugged her shoulders, 'I just realize I haven't been to one of these…well ever and thought I could try it. I mean Matt always comes alone and so do you girls. Maybe it could be my thing too.'

Jay quickly typed something on her phone her face carrying a soft smile Kim noticed she sometimes had when she was texting someone.

'So it's because of Matt?' she asked suddenly which surprised Kim because she was right and because she thought Jay wasn't listening to her.

'Well, a little bit, but it's nothing. I just wanted to see what the party is all about,' said Kim and smiled hoping it wasn't too forced.

Jay titled her head at her and it somehow reminded Kim of a bird.

'Well, if your plan was to spy on your boyfriend-'

'I'm not spying on Matt-'

'Then you're doing it wrong. You should come to a party without him knowing you will come. That way you can really see what he's doing,' said Jay and drank some more.

Kim paused for a moment. Jay's words made sense if Kim was trying to catch Matt doing something he shouldn't be. However, her words…they made Kim start thinking again.

'Wh-why would you say that?' asked the redhead looking not being able to hold her cheerful attitude any longer, 'Should I spy on him? Do you think I have a reason?'

She saw how Jay's face suddenly changed like the confidence slipped away a bit.

The blonde shook her head, 'No, sorry. That's not what I mean. I…Matt's great. I'm just anti-boys. It's not my business.'

'But you think something is wrong,' said Kim feeling her heart beating fast.

'No, I don't know you or Matt well enough and I never saw anything…I just said something stupid. I'm sorry, Kim.'

But the apologize and Jay's guilty look didn't make Kim feel any better. She sat the cane down, 'I'm need to go.'

'Kim,' started Jay, but she already ran away from the kitchen suddenly not feeling like she wanted to be in Jay's company any longer.

'Hey, babe, there you are,' said Matt. She found him talking to some of his team mates. They all greeted her nicely as usual.

'Boy, Mattie, aren't you lucky?' asked Pete one of Matt's oldest friend as he tried to put his arm around Kim. She could smell the alcohol on his breath. He was always so nice and funny, but this was in Kim's mind not an _okay_ behavior toward the girlfriend of your friend.

Matt sighed and pushed him away pulling Kim protectively closer to him, 'Thanks, pal, now leave her be.'

'Don't mind him, Lisa is being mean to him again,' said Matt and made a grimace. Kim nodded and smiled at him. Why was she doubting him so much? Jay was maybe joking and she acted like an irrational girlfriend, and Nicole was a rebel. She always flirted and acted like she wanted to get people to riot. Why was she bringing things to heart so much.

She stayed with Matt almost the whole time, and she had to admit, he was his normal nice boy self. He joked with his buddies and drank a bit, but he was just having fun. Nothing was weird and Kim actually liked being there. She stuck mostly to Matt or Sabrina, another sober driver and it was actually a nicely spent Saturday until someone didn't spill coke on her sweater and shirt.

'Shit, sorry, my bad,' said the clearly drunk girl as her friend was dragging her through the hallways, 'Sorry, she had enough.'

Kim nodded looking at her ruined clothes, 'Obviously.'

She sighed feeling upset and looked at Matt, 'Bathroom?'

'The door on the right,' she nodded and went inside just as Nicole came asking Matt if he saw Jay. She stopped at the door for a moment realizing since she left her in the kitchen she didn't see the blonde. Was it okay to just abandon her like that? She was Jay McClaud, she knew how to take care of herself, but she still felt like maybe she should have came look for her afterwards and see if she was okay.

She went into the bathroom and tried to clean her clothes thinking about Jay. Once she thought there wasn't more to be done she walked outside only to find Matt wasn't there waiting for her.

'Pete felt sick so Matt took him outside. He didn't want him to puke anywhere in the house,' explained Sabrina.

Kim nodded and thanked her. Of course, her sweetheart would go to help his friend.

She decided to also go look for Jay and apologize about her behavior. It was the least she could do and probably the last thing as she had to go home soon. She had a curfew after all.

She walked upstairs since she wasn't familiar with the house she asked a couple of people if they saw Jay or Nicole. Some pointed her to a room nearby.

She opened the door only to hear, 'Will everyone stay the fuck out? We're in the middle of something!'

She quickly shut the door her eyes wide as she saw a boy and girl inside. The girl just fourteen year old Tess Simmons who she knew from the Church.

She backed away from the door like it burnt her. Now she definitely wanted to leave. Why would the girl be in a room at some girl's party having sex?

Kim moved down the hallways she came from only to notice blonde and raven hair from the corner of her eyes.

She stopped seeing Jay and Nicole on Nicole's bed talking while holding hands. Their voices were so soft so she couldn't make up what they were saying, but it was obvious Nicole Diaz and Jay McClaud had a bond not many people shared. Right now the two girls looked so peaceful, Kim felt bad for being upset with them about Matt.

She stepped into the room, 'Uh, Nicole?'

The girls looked at her and sat up quickly, 'I have to go home, but the party was great. Good work.'

Nicole blinked. She didn't look drunk despite Matt and Carmen's claim Nicole was always hammered.

She smirked at her, 'No problem. Thanks for coming, did something happened?'

Kim blinked at her confused.

'You're leaving,' explained Jay and Kim giggled a bit shaking her head, 'No, I just have a curfew. Enjoy your night.'

'Kim!' called Jay just as Kim was about to close the door, 'About what I said. Forget it, I just…sometimes I say the wrong things.'

This caught Kim off guard completely because in her eyes Jay was always this confident girl with ice cold attitude who always seemed to know what she was doing never blinded by emotions of feelings.

Kim smiled at her, 'It's nothing. Good night.'

'Night, Kim.'

'Good night,'

Kim walked out of the hallway and down the stairs feeling incredibly lighter than when she came. She didn't have to worry about anything.

As she walked outside she found Matt texting while Pete was lying on the ground looking at the sky.

She made a grimace and walked to the two, 'Do you need help with him?'

'Don't worry. I called a cab. I don't want him to puke in your car. Is it okay if you will drive on your own home?' asked Matt putting his phone away, 'I don't want him to go alone like this.'

Kim nodded smiling, 'Yeah, take care of him. I will text you later.'

'When you get home, so I will know you're safe,' said Matt and Kim rolled her eyes a bit but smiled, 'When I get home.'

He leaned down and kissed her softly before rubbing his nose against hers, 'Good night, Kim. I love you.'

'I love you too.'

She looked down, 'Good night, Pete.'

'Nighty-night, Kim Sawyer,' mumbled Pete.

As Kim walked to her car she looked up and froze as for a moment she saw something large jump from one roof to another before disappearing in the dark. She didn't see what it was and maybe it was just a cat and the show looked bigger than the actual animal, but it caused her to froze for a moment and just watch the place it had disappeared.

For some reason reached her hand to touch the cross under her scarf before going into her car.

What a weird night that was…

 _God, please, please...I don't want to die yet._

* * *

Donnie felt like he barely caught any sleep that day. They came back late from the patrol, but it was mostly the state of his mind which was killing him. His thoughts were all over the place, and at one point he felt like fainting when he woke up. It was like his own damn mind was just _too_ loud today.

He got to the kitchen. His brothers were already there talking about something when Raph said his name. 'Donnie, you need to have a look at the stove, man,' said his brother handing Mikey a plate.

Donnie mumbled weakly, 'Okay, I will fix it after lunch.'

He was feeling like he was sick. Maybe he should just return to bed after lunch.

He had been working nonstop, and it was finally getting to him. He needed to just pause everything.

'Hey, you okay? What are you up to today?' asked Leo smiling as he sat down next to him. Despite Raph being a dick about it, he was right about one thing, Leo was almost nauseously happy ever since he could admit he was with Jay. Maybe it was just the bitterness, jealousy and lack of sleep on Donnie's part, but he genuinely did not feel okay with Leo being happy 24/7. Leo was always...well, Leo...this was strange.

Master Splinter was silently reading newspapers while Donnie try to explain to Leo his new invention as simple as possible even though he could see it was no use. Still, he had to give Leo points for trying to look like he understood and always ask new questions. He was the big brother after all.

When Raph brought the food to the table, they started to eat. The conversation was mostly short lived as they filled their mouths with food until Master Splinter asked about last night.

'A robbery and car chase near Spanish Harlem. It was fun,' said Raph with a smirk.

Donnie looked over at Raph and noticed that Mikey was looking at him as well. Their brother was being a bit weird as well. More pissed than before. Donnie would think it had something to do with Leo and his Jay expect that Raph looked okay about it after the revelation and then got all _ass_ about it again. It was like something happened which changed his mind and Donnie could only hope he didn't fall for Jay's girl or thought Leo and Jay should break up again. He didn't have the energy for more drama right now.

Mikey took his mug, 'Oh, guess what? Mo is a chick.'

Donnie froze with the spoon half way to him mouth.

 _So much for less drama..._

'Your video game friend is a girl?' asked Leo, the first one to speak, while Donnie tried to shove his inventions thoughts away and focus on Mikey and Mo for a moment.

'Yup.'

'Doubt that,' mumbled Raph and continued to eat.

This was not happening. Mikey didn't just casually admit Mo was a girl. Why would he do that? Did she tell him? She had to tell him. But if she did could it be that he had to tell her something in return? Did he spill their secret?

He looked over at Mikey.

'It's true. She told me last night,' argued Mikey with Raph who looked like he didn't believe it one bit.

'You know she could be lying, right?' asked Leo carefully probably not wanting to hurt Mikey's feelings or offend him. Typical Leo.

'Yeah, cause Trevor _loves_ lying,' teased Raph.

'Dude, I'm telling you, her name is Molly and she's a girl,' said Mikey getting annoyed with Raph.

'Whatever.'

'I can prove it,' said Mikey finally and Raph gave him a look, 'How?'

Donnie wished he could just leave this conversation and get behind his laptop and find out what the hell did Mikey do.

'Well, I can't but Donnie can if he traces her IP address?' asked Mikey hesitantly and looked at him.

Donnie looked at him disbelieved. Was he serious? All this time he was afraid of what would they say if they found out he already did that, and Mikey actually wanted him to do it?

He saw how Leo gave Mikey an _older brother_ look which matched Master Splinter's _father_ look, 'My son, I do not believe it would be wise to make sure a violation of Ms. Molly's privacy. If she wanted for you to know who she really was he would have send you a picture.'

'Or download it off the web,' cut in Raph and Mikey was about to say something when Donnie finally had enough or maybe the lack of good rest made him inside because the next thing he said was, 'Actually. She's not lying. She's a girl. A teenage girl.'

The whole table went silent before Leo let out an annoyed sigh, 'Donnie, _how_ do you know that?'

'What?' asked Donnie in the moment of absolute insanity not even caring, 'Mikey was writing stuff about himself to a stranger I just wanted to make sure it's not someone from the Purple Dragons or Shredder or someone from our other long list of enemies. It was the most ration thing to do.' In that moment he would be ready to tell them about April and all the shitty things he did since then. Hell, he would even tell about how Mikey and him wondered into some humans when they were kids. That would have been fun.

Raph shook his head, 'Whatever, it's not like you can show yourself to her.'

'Who cares? I was right and she wasn't lying, and Donnie, stop acting like a stalker. What if she found out my brother was stalking her?' asked Mikey upset looking at Donnie and Raph.

That caused Donnie to actually blush, 'I wasn't...I didn't stalk anyone as soon as I found out she was a real teen girl I deleted the Ispy from her computer. I didn't like browse her files and stuff. Well, not apart from checking if she was just an ordinary girl.'

'You should get a medal for that,' said Raph looking annoyed.

'Enough,' said Master Splinter breaking their bricking, 'My sons. Let's eat in peace. Donatello, Michelangelo, I would like to have a word with you after lunch.'

Mikey sighed and shot Donnie a look before he dug into his food.

Donnie sighed mentally preparing himself for what will Master Splinter have to say as well as just getting it over with. He needed to know what did Mikey tell Mo, the girl who knew about them, about them. He looked over at his little brother. Maybe he should confess now, start clean.

Leo groaned suddenly cutting his train of thoughts, 'Mikey, manners. You're not a pig.'

'Mikey's worse,' said Raph looking like he didn't want to continue eating.

After lunch Leo and Raph conveniently left leaving Donnie and him with their Master.

He sat them down.

'Donatello, I do not have to explain to you what you did was truly not right and inappropriate for the young girl even if it was to protect our secret.'

Donnie looked like he was about to argue, but in the end just nodded. What could he say? How could he rational this? He was too tired today. Any other day he would argue he did it to protect them and he had every right, but today he was just too tired.

'Yes, Master, but I didn't do it for anything like _that_. I just wanted to be sure who she was. I didn't even tell Mikey who she was just so I wouldn't betray privacy. The moment I knew she was really just a girl. I swear, Mikey, I got rid out of her computer and didn't go there again. I didn't even read what you wrote her.'

 _Laaaaaair!_

Mikey nodded, 'Good.'

'Michelangelo, did you wrote her anything about us? Who we are?'

'Of course not, Master Splinter. I wouldn't do that,' said Mikey almost convincing. Maybe he should really just leave it now.

'But you did write her something about your life? Details?'

Mikey felt his hand sweating, 'Just some stuff...nothing which would tell her we're not humans or where we are. I swear. '

'You must be careful, my son. Donatello, even if method wasn't something I would encourage, was right. You never know who are your real friends. I do not want to isolate you from the world, but be careful who you let into your world, mind and soul...not everyone is a friend and has good intentions,' said their Master and nodded for them that they could leave.

They walked away together when Mikey asked suddenly, 'How does she look?'

Donnie stopped in track and looked at him, 'Like physically?'

Why wouldn't he just want him to show him her profile?

'Yeah...she likes boys stuff so is she a tomboy?' asked the turtle.

'She has pink hair,' said Donnie remembering the new photo he saw, 'I saw an online photo. Her cam is ductaped which is a very smart thing to do.'

Mikey shot him a look and Donnie realized that was the exact thing which made him sound like a stalker, 'You said you didn't spy further.'

'I didn't. I check the IP address of the computer then the address of the residence and then the people who lived there. Apart from a fifty seven year old woman she is the only other person who lives there.'

'Is she cute?' asked Mikey sounding almost hopeful.

 _He's definitely crushing on her._

'Actually, I think she looks a bit weird...like with the hair, but...it's kind of like interesting weird? But who am I to judge?' he pointed at his face and made a grimace. The girl was absolutely not Donnie's type.

Mikey chuckled, 'I really think she's cool and my friend.'

Donnie looked strange for a moment, 'But you're not planning to tell her right?'

This was the whole thing. Was Mikey going to tell her? Will she tell him she writes the NY vigilantes?

Mikey shook his head, 'No, of course not. I would never betray our secret, Donnie. Don't worry,' he nodded at him and smiled.

Donnie watched him for a moment not sure if the trust him or not. He was...he was Mikey, and he was desperate for friendship and _love_. If he thought Mo was awesome and he was crushing on her of course at some point he would want to admit the green colour to him. Maybe even more if she told him she wrote about them.

'Besides, as a superhero, I need a girlfriend who doesn't know about my hidden identity.'

'Oh Jesus, Mikey. Not with the superhero stuff again, please,' whined Donnie annoyed a bit.

Mikey just shook it off with a laugh and went to his room.

Donnie watched him leave and wondered more than ever what to do. He in such a mess. He should have just come clean, but how could he? He already saw how they were all upset about him spying on Mo. If Mikey found out he actually read their messages he would be furious.

He went into the workshop and quickly started to go through the messages from yesterday. He was sure he had a heart attack when all of the sudden he spotted the question...

 _Hey, quick question...what's your favourite colour?_

This could only mean one thing...

She knew.

He took a deep breath and tried to piece it all together. Mo was the girl Mikey return her bag to. She was mute which explained why she _signed_ thank you instead of screaming. She was also the creator and author of Vigilantes of New York which meant she was writing about them, and on top of it all she was writing for months now with Mikey who had no idea of any of this.

He scratched the back of his head before he literally went insane and went through her history as well as the whole website. After Mikey log off last night, the girl went over a lot of information and research about them, but in the end wrote absolutely nothing about it.

Donnie was sure the girl was afraid that if she admitted who she was Mikey would think she was trying to trick him all this time. Donnie would have think so too expect that the evidence proved her innocence. She really just started to chat with Mikey after playing fortnite together, and most likely found out he was the turtle hero she has been writing about all this time only yesterday.

He read the last couple of messages over again. She was worried about him now, and probably felt bad so she told him something about herself to make up for it. Since she couldn't tell him about the website she told him she was a girl.

Donnie let out a frustrating sigh.

 _When did all of this become so complicated?_

He took a deep breath now and actually walked out of his workshop to one of his brothers' room. He was just too tired. He needed to rest, and to finally be able to do that, he couldn't continue to keep this secret alone anymore.

When Leo opened his door, he blinked at him concerned, 'Donnie, you okay?'

'No, can we talk, please?'

Leo nodded immediately and let him in looking worried.

'What's going on?'

Donnie walked inside making sure to wait until Leo would close the door.

'What is it?' he asked again and Donnie sat down frowning as he was starting to get a headache from all the drama, 'I want...I want to talk about our brother.'

Leo nodded and sat down as well, 'Raph.'

'No, Mikey,' clarified Donnie obviously surprising his brother.

'Oh, okay? Can you explain?' asked Leo looking a bit lost why would they need to talk about Mikey in the first place.

Donnie sighed, 'You know about Mikey's new friend? The one he has been obsessively talking for weeks now?'

Leo nodded slowly.

'Well, I know I shouldn't have but, I need to make sure that we're safe. I always make sure. When he first started playing games with him I let it go. He played online with a lot of people and it was never anything serious, but this Mo. He really got attached, so I wanted to make sure it wasn't some trick or trap from the Purple Dragon or the Foot.'

'And did you find something?' asked the older brother. Donnie wouldn't come if it wasn't serious and if he didn't found anything he wouldn't even bother to confess.

His younger brother nodded, 'Yeah, it's...well, kind of...'

Leo looked like he was preparing for the worst.

'First of all, Mo is not a he...it's a she. More specifically a girl name Molly.'

The other turtle was silent for a moment before he said, 'Oh, yeah, I'm pretty sure, Mikey told us this like half an hour ago? Donnie are you feeling okay?'

Donnie shook his head, 'No, not a good _oh_ a very very bad _oh._ '

Donnie sighed, 'Look, I'm very exhausted, but hear me out. I always make sure we know about every single time something about us comes up in the media. Usually it's nothing like a very shady looking footage or article. Mainly all of this on that website Vigilantes of New York which Mikey is so into. Well, since the site was writing about us a lot. I hacked it and figured out whose site it is to make sure they're not working with anyone who could hurt us. Turns out it was a bizarre looking teenage girl with pretty weird hair color, who is mute, but nothing dangerous so I just made sure to run some Ispy and make sure no one else would hack the site to keep her safe. A couple of weeks ago I looked into Mikey's friend just to be sure Mikey didn't spill anything as well as to find out they weren't with our enemies either. Mo, Mikey's friend also turned out to be a bizarre looking teenage girl with pretty weird hair color who is mute. Are you following what I am saying?'

Leo opened his mouth stunned in that moment as the realization hit him over the head, 'Gosh, I hope _not_.'

'It gets worse. Neither of them knew about this until Mikey didn't mention he _helped_ with his brothers a girl once who signed him _thank you_.'

Leo put a hand against his face, 'You got to be kidding me.'

'Nope, the girl who Mikey saved, the girl who's he writing with and the girl who's the author of the website about us is the same girl, Molly Jones.'

'Fantastic,' sighed Leo and looked up at him. He really looked like he wouldn't even want to have that information now.

'What kind of freaky coincidence is that?' asked Leo after a moment of thinking it all through.

'The same kind which gets turtles and a man to turn into ninja turtles and a rat,' said Donnie.

'Also, as if yesterday Molly Jones knows who she is writing with. When Mikey wrote her about saving he girl who signed to him she ask what is his favourite color.'

'Does Mikey know?' asked Leo finally.

'Absolutely not,' said Donnie, 'As far as I can tell, she didn't plan this, and I think she might be worried he would think she did if she admitted it. He's not writing her anything about us, well, anything else, and she's not asking. I think she was guilty he told her, which is why she admitted she's a girl,' said Donnie actually believe that the girl didn't have bad intentions with this.

Leo shook his head thinking it all over, 'Then don't tell him.'

'Do you think it's for the best, Leo?' asked Donnie sceptical. He was feeling better now that he burned Leo with the whole thing, but he also didn't think lying to Mikey more would be the best result. It was...it felt like such a betrayal on his part. He expected Leo to be the rightist one as usual and tell him to go get clean with Mikey right that moment.

Leo sighed, 'I don't want to ruin something for him if it is just a stupid coincidence. If the girl didn't try to trick him and is not digging for info from him. Do we even have the right to interfere?'

'Well, Mikey doesn't know any of this. He is in the disadvantage of some girl,' said Donnie not convince at all.

'You think I'm being soft,' sighed Leo as he could clearly see Donnie's expression.

'Yeah, you're acting like a lovesick puppy,' said Donnie annoyed, 'Look, this isn't about you or Jay. Jay might be just a girl who met you, but this Molly actually is researching and writing about us. If people _dangerous_ people get a hold of the same information as I have they might try to use her research to hurt us, to hurt Mikey since he is already invested with the girl.'

Leo rolled his eyes not bothering to comment on it.

'Let's wait. We will talk with Mikey and you can continue to check her out, but in the mean time we must be sure. I don't want to ruin this for him by outing the girl if she doesn't...Mikey really likes this girl. If we tell him who she really is he will shut her out which will only hurt him. Just make sure Mikey doesn't tell her anything about where we are and admits the whole thing. If she asks anything strange or too revealing we will tell him. For now let's just get it to run its natural course.'

Donnie sighed, 'This was not the answer I was hoping for.'

'You want me to go tell Mikey so you will get punish for not telling him sooner?' asked Leo kindly.

'Maybe,' admitted Donnie.

'Well, you're out of luck, because at the moment being quiet about this, is the best thing for Mikey. You got yourself into this mess, Donnie, you have to swim in it now.'

Donnie shook his head and went to leave. Well, sometimes confessing to someone really didn't help at all.

 _Please...God, if you exist, please, don't let her die here._

* * *

 **A.N: Hey, I managed to finish earlier. Next chapter will catch up with the events from the subway, so Kim and Donnie will finally get some action as well. Hope you like it so far. Thank you for the support as always. I think I should have the chapter by the end of this year.**


	15. The Perfect Girl 03

**The Perfect Girl**

* * *

 _Your heart and my heart are very, very old friends – Hafiz_

* * *

School days were slowly coming to an end. The Christmas was approaching and Kim was in the process of thinking up this year's presents. She also wondered what she should ask for this year. Ever since her parents explained to her that Santa wasn't real, she should have always say what she wanted and they would pack it and give it to her in secret since Abby still thought he was real. Kim adored Christmas time. It was so full of joy and in general the world seemed like a better place. Sure, it was naive to think that, and she didn't _really_ believe that, but seeing how happy Abby was every time they went to see the Santa or how the church was always full around the holidays, it felt that way. It genuinely felt like the world was a better place.

She went to the cafeteria, but since Matt or anyone she spent most of the time with wasn't there, yet, she sat down next to Pete.

'Feeling better?' asked the redhead with a smile.

The boy chuckled, 'Sorry, if I said anything stupid.'

'It's okay, alcohol does that to a person,' said Kim nodding.

She noticed how Pete was checking his phone.

'Lisa?'

'Y-yeah,' mumbled the boy and put the whole away digging into his food, 'She's still upset about a couple of things. I get it.'

The girl nodded, 'If you agree you made a mistake, it can't be unfixable. You and Lisa are so in love with each other.'

He smiled at her in thanks, 'True, but there are some things you shouldn't do. Things like go out for coffee with your ex, I guess.'

'Oh,' Kim was surprised by this, 'Then why did you?'

'To catch up. I mean, Robin was my first girlfriend, my first love. Even if it ended, I couldn't cut her out completely. I want to know how is she doing, if she's happy. First loves are usually like that. They change you to be the person you will be one day,' said Pete and Kim smiled understanding a bit what he meant, for her Matt was that person too.

God forbid they would broke up, but if they did, she would still want to be friends with him. Know he was happy as well.

'Let me ask you though. Does it bother you?' asked Pete, 'Like, I think Lisa is over doing it a bit. I mean I shouldn't have gone out with Robin, but Matt had a first love before you and you're cool about it, right?'

Kim stopped eating and looked up at Pete confused, 'What do you mean?'

'Oh shit, you didn't know Matt, had a girlfriend before you?' asked Pete looking actually worried like he spilled a secret.

Kim shook her head slowly, 'No, sorry, I did, I just thought it wasn't anything _serious_.'

It was true. Matt mentioned someone was before Kim, but he only said it as if between the conversations like it was just some little girl back in third grade even if it happened during the summer.

 _Could it be that instead of a couple of dates it was a summer romance?_

'Right, no, it was just a summer fling. No biggie. I had my fair share of those. Mostly it's just to bone and go,' assured her Pete, but without knowing so he unleashed the whole Pandora 's Box on Kim.

Was Matt….? Was Matt not a virgin anymore?

'Hey babe,' said the boy in question as he came to sit next to them.

He lightly kissed her cheek, 'So what are we talking about?'

Pete shook his head, 'I don't even know. Did you guys see Lisa?'

'Dude, let it go,' chuckled Matt, and Kim tried to force a smile, but all she was thinking now was Matt and the mystery girl he said was no big deal.

When they first started officially dating, Matt confessed that over the summer before Kim started at Kennedy high, he was seeing some girl, but it wasn't anything serious. He only said that they broke it off after the summer as they both knew it wouldn't work out and it was just to spent a bit of time together. Nothing too serious.

However, the way Pete put it felt pretty serious to Kim now. He might have actually lost his virginity to the girl, and could it be that he was still in contact with her? He said it like this _girl_ was Matt's first love. Kim thought…she thought she was his first love…

Kim didn't even know who the girl was.

Could it be Nicole?

Why would it be Nicole? He didn't even know Nicole before the school year, or did he?

She was so confused and frustrated now. All she wanted to do was to full on ask him, but not with Pete around.

'Hey, uh, I actually wanted to go to talk to Jay for a moment,' said Kim and stood up surprising the two, 'So you guys can talk boys' things.'

She quickly left without kissing him goodbye and went to Jay's table. Since a couple of days or maybe a week ago Jay was now sitting with Molly Jones.

Kim wasn't sure if now was the time to ask Molly about the magazine, but talking to Jay would at least be a good excuse to help her get away from the thoughts and doubts Pete brought on her.

'Hi girls.'

'Hey, Kim,' said the blonde and both her and Molly put away their phones showing that they were giving her their attention which was nice.

Kim sat down next to her giving her a quick smile before she turned to Jay hoping she wasn't being rude, 'Did you have time to check the new routine?'

'Yeah, it's great,' said Jay and looked somehow pleased. Kim didn't fail to notice that sometimes Jay looked very happy and pleased with herself and the redhead wondered if it was because of Nicole Diaz being friends with her again or maybe the secret guy she has been texting and calling sometimes.

She wasn't being nosy, but Carmen and Ginny talked a lot and one of them mentioned that Jay was speaking with some guy very nicely which was shocking as Jay was...Kim knew Jay was a good person, but still she could be a bit icy with people. Still, if it was true and Jay did find someone she considered worthy of her time and was nice to him, Kim was happy for her.

'You really did a great job. You know coach could have done it, right?' asked Jay raising her brows a bit.

Kim shrugged her shoulders. She was happy with the praise, but the way Jay said it, it was clear she thought Kim was being a teacher's pet.

'I know, but she has a lot on her plate and dancing is something I enjoy. It's kind of lame and cliché, but it's fun. It's the thing which feel like it's fun not just hard work and studying.'

The redhead looked at her looking startled all of the sudden realizing she said too much, 'Not that I don't like studying and all the other things, but dancing just feels like...free and well fun and something which isn't done only for the benefit to be first or better. Dancing is like showing the pure chaos, but not the evil kind, but good. You can dance and be more yourself than you can while just walking or standing still. People dance to express themselves. Express feelings and emotions you simply don't have words in any language for. When you dance you don't think, you just feel like in love or faith. You just feel and you're...you're just you,' she confessed. It was true ever since she was the little girl in dance classes, dancing was like the only place where everyone was always happy and had a good time. It made Kim believe that it was the happiest place on earth, not Disneyland. Maybe it even was for those kids who danced and their parents and relatives who came to see them it was pretty amazing.

She looked at the two girls feeling very awkward all of the sudden and they were looking at her so stunned and surprised.

'Also if we win the nationals this year it would really help out some of the girls with their scholarships,' she said while looking away.

She caught Molly waving at her and signed, _Scholarships?_

Kim smiled a bit feeling that she impressed Molly a bit with that, 'Oh, yeah, you see many universities have cheerleading in their school programs so for many it's a way to get a scholarships like a sport scholarship. You know Ava, the freshman who joined with you?' she asked Jay, who nodded.

'She's really good, but her well...she has a hard time with money. If we win the nations five girls in the squad get a scholarship. I really hope she could be one of them. She's very good.'

Kim smiled at her shyly and Molly smiled back.

 _That's really nice of you Kim._

Kim shook her head even if she felt really good Molly Jones approved for some reason. Ever since she started the school, she felt like Molly hated her. She constantly avoided her and looked like she would rather not get associated with her. She knew she couldn't always be on good terms with everyone even if she wanted to. She wouldn't want to be on good terms with murderers or people who hurt other people, but having Molly be upset with her actually hurt for some reason, 'Oh, no, the program has been here for a while now. I'm just...I just think if you have a shot to do something you should. Like I said dancing is super fun.'

The three girls smiled at each other, and Kim felt shy yet glad they were all talking like this until they heard a new voice approach.

'Damn it, my head hurts.'

They all looked up only to find Nicole Diaz dragging herself to their table until she sat down next to Jay and then lied her head on her knee.

'That's usually what happens when you drink on school day,' said Jay and pinched the other girl causing her to let out a pained noise, 'Knock it off, Jay!'

Molly watched the exchange shock before she looked over at Kim who shared a weirdout look with her.

Nicole was...it was complicated for Kim to be around Nicole now more than ever since she started having mixed feelings about Matt.

'You must be a terrible lover, not gentle at all,' said Nicole throwing Jay annoyed looks.

Jay raised her brows at her looking amused wearing a look. She had that happy look on her face Kim spotted at Nicole's party when the two were sitting on the latino's girl bed, 'Wasn't it you who said boys are only good to bone and go?'

'Hey, I never pinched the-,' Nicole caught herself mid sentence before she nodded, 'Fair enough, Jay.'

Kim left like blushing hearing this. Sex talks in public always made her feel weird.

When Nicole looked around the table and Kim and Molly, the redhead gave her an awkward wave while Molly frowned at her. Oddly, Kim felt good knowing Molly didn't like Nicole. It made her feel Molly wasn't just against her at least.

Nicole stared at her for a couple of moment before she pointed at her, 'Didn't we drink together this Saturday?'

Molly made a grimace like she was chuckling annoyed and shook her head clearly thinking the idea was hilarious.

'Damn, what was I doing?' asked the latina looking around a bit.

'Drinking?' offered Kim slowly.

'More like _who_ were you doing?' joked Jay.

' _Jay_ ,' gasped Kim suddenly and all girls looked at her.

Molly shot her an amused look before she made hang gesture and Kim looked at her horrified which for some reason made Molly even more amused from the situation. She really was not okay with sex talks especially when they were talking so casually in the cafeteria where everyone could hear them.

'What did she say?' asked Nicole suddenly causing them to look at her.

Kim looked almost red feeling her cheeks burning now, 'I'm _not_ repeating that.'

'Was it dirty?' asked Nicole with a smile, 'I bet it was dirty. This chick gets my freaky.'

'Gross,' mumbled Jay before she laughed causing all of them to look surprised. Jay McClaud laughing was something Kim only assumed happened, but didn't witness since their dance class days. It was nice to see her laugh like that.

'I know this means _fuck_ ,' said Jay repeating the gesture.

'Jay,' sighed Kim and Nicole immediately started to mimic it, 'Wait, what? This?'

Molly shook her head and did the gesture again.

'Can we not please?' begged Kim looking utterly desperate. She really did not like this conversation one bit even if it made the others girls happy and laugh.

'Is it a dirty word if we sign it though?' asked Jay out loud and Kim shook a disbelieve look while Molly shook her head thinking it was not.

'Okay, how about this?' asked Nicole.

Molly shook her head before she signed something which Kim immediately voiced, 'That means coffee?'

Molly stood up suddenly and leaned over the table to Nicole. She easily caught her hand situated her fingers and hand until she got the sign.

'Ha,' said Nicole and smiled at her. Molly sat back down.

'I will totally use it on the principal now.'

'Nicole~'

Jay chuckled again and fixed her blonde curls a bit even if they really didn't need any fixing.

Nicole practised the gesture a couple of times before she asked, 'How do you sign _cock_?'

This time even Kim couldn't help, but actually laugh at the hilarious of the situation that she was with Jay, Nicole and Molly discussing dirty words in sign language.

After it got close to the bell ringing they all started to leave saying their goodbyes. It was strange, but that brief moment, Kim felt very connected with the three girls she didn't spent much time together.

'Kim, you coming?' asked her Ginny as she and Carmen stopped by her.

Despite getting up and walking with them to class, she felt like maybe she could spent more time with the three girls. It wasn't like she was only hanging out with cheerleaders, but with so many activities on Kim's list, it was hard at times to interact with all her classmates. Somehow because being a cheer-captain, and class president and all dances committee member she only ever spent time with the same people who were involved with all those things as well.

Since made a mental note to maybe try to be around Molly Jones at least a bit more. Once she got home she texted her about the opening in the school magazine. She was delighted when she got it and even offered her her Joan of the Ark dress. She didn't think she and Molly could be best friends, but the more time she spent with the teen the more she liked her, Jay as well.

Still, at times it felt to Kim like Molly Jones was the saddest person on ear. She noticed how the girl sometimes went incredibly still like she was having an inside battle.

'You look a bit down today, everything okay?' asked Kim with a bright smile hoping to light the girl's day as well.

Molly looked over at her from her lunch and shrugged her shoulders before she signed.

 _Nothing big...just working out some things._

Kim touched Molly's shoulder, 'About what you said? About that guy who it got messy in the end?'

Kim remembered how Molly mentioned the guy when she was taking about her and Matt, and felt maybe this was the reason Molly was so...reserved? Troubled? It was hard to describe the aura around Molly Jones, but it made you feel like she was cursed fairy. At least that was how Kim saw her.

Molly nodded slowly like she was unsure what Kim wanted.

'Are you still with him?'

Molly firmly shook her head.

 _No, I ended it the moment, I realize what a piece of shit he was._

Kim nodded and smiled, 'Good because I really think you have a shot with that guy you're constantly texting with.'

Molly's cheeks went red. Kim might not have always know what was going on, but she saw the numours amout of text messages Molly Jones shared with someone called _Mi._ She smiled a lot of when she texted that person so it couldn't be anyone bad or her ex.

 _No, I'm...he's just a friend. Good friend, but that wouldn't work out._

'Oh, sorry, I just saw how excited you are and how you smile. I think people only smile like that when they're happy. When you find someone who makes you smile and happy like that,' Kim shrugged her shoulders, 'You have to stick with them.'

Molly watched her silently before she signed, _Like you and Matt?_

Kim wanted to smile and say agree with her, but for some reason which Kim couldn't voice, the moment Molly finished signing she couldn't even force a smile. Ever since she started to think about all those things with Matt it was confusing. All of it...

I...I don't know anymore...

'Yeah, I...yeah.'

 _God, please, please...I don't want to die yet._

* * *

Kim was sitting alone in the lockers room listening to music and working out a few things. She figured she should write down a couple of things to be better at thinking them through. When she was younger she used to have a diary, but as she got older she got more things to do and stopped writing into it completely.

After her discussion with Molly she realized she wanted to have a future with Matt, but for that she had to talk to him about the whole virginity thing. They never spoke about that, which created a bubble where Kim didn't have to worry about it. Sex wasn't the main goal of her relationship so why should she?

Because of the earphones Kim fail to notice Jay as she entered the lockers room and pulled one out of her ear.

The blond then stood up and crossed her arms, 'What are you listening to? Kim Sawyer listens to rock?'

Kim mimicked her gesture and crossed her arms, 'For your information it's a religious rock band. Skillet. Heard of them?'

'Yeah. They're a religious rock band? Whoa,' said Jay impressed and Kim shrugged her shoulders, 'I'm not just a cupcake you know.'

'Oh, you're tough as a nail, Kim,' agreed Jay jokingly and Kim giggled at the pretend serious in Jay's voice.

She moved her bag, 'Come on, find your inner religious rock God.'

Jay shook her head before actually sitting down next to Kim. She took one of the earphone she offered her and put it into her ear the two of them listening to the lyrics of _Feel Invincible_.

'That's good.'

'I sometimes dance to that,' admitted Kim.

'Yeah? Hard to believe you can dance to that, but I guess it got the beat,' said Jay listening and actually thinking about it before she stood up.

'Can you play it louder on the phone, please?' she asked and went in front of Kim. She briefly looked around to check if it was just them and Kim pulled out her earphones making the music start to echo through the room.

Jay suddenly started to dance their cheerleading routine to the rhythm of the soon.

Kim watched in awe as Jay moves actually matched the rhythms and beats of the music, 'Whoa, Jay.'

The blonde finished and chuckled at Kim who paused the music, 'You're so talented Jay.'

'Thanks, but so are you,' assured her Jay, but the redhead shook her head, 'I work very hard, but it's still...thought, but you? You're a natural.'

Jay smiled at her, 'I think anyone can be good, but thanks Kim. It's good to know I am good at something.'

She sat down again in front of her this time.

'What's that?' asked Jay looking at the notes Kim was making about her discussion with Matt, 'Uh, well. Nothing just preparing myself for a presentation.'

Jay nodded slowly and it was clear she didn't buy it. Kim sighed, 'I'm sort of preparing to have a discussion about sex with Matt later. Since it's something we never spoke about before.'

Jay made a grimace, 'Whoa, I didn't know people had to plan discussions like that. I thought it should come naturally.'

'It should, but,' Kim shook her head and bite her lips a bit, 'I found out that Matt isn't a virgin and now I feel like this pressure on my chest that maybe I'm a bad girlfriend because we...well...we didn't.'

'It's fine, Kim, I understand,' said Jay quickly saving her the embarrassment of saying it out loud.

'I hope the pressure is only in your head, because Matt has zero right to pressure you into anything,' said Jay and Kim smiled, 'Absolutely. He doesn't even know I know I know he's not a virgin. His friend, Pete, let it slip on accident,' explained Kim shrugging her shoulders.

Jay brushed her hair a bit behind her ear, 'Well, don't you find it weird? That you didn't know about this?'

Kim shrugged her shoulders, 'We never talked about sex. We spoke about pretty much everything, but we're Catholics. I still sometimes get embarrassed when I say it like it's a dirty word.'

'Yeah, you're blushing right now too,' grinned Jay and Kim let out a groan.

Jay touched her shoulder, 'Come on, knock it off. It's fine to be shy or not ready for some things...I'm seeing this guy and we didn't spoke about this stuff either yet.'

'Oh how long have you been together?' asked Kim excited which made Jay smile apparently, 'Just a couple of weeks, but it's pretty serious. Different than with any guy I was before, those were just kisses and makeout seasons which lead to nothing for me.'

Kim brushed her shoulder, 'So it's possible? To like...have something casual?'

'Sure, ask Nicole, she has something casual every Friday. No strings attached,' said Jay shrugging her shoulders.

'But I think you have to be that person. Nicole is like...like you're a catholic so for you there is joy which always has to be followed by pain which will then be repaid with a new joy, yes? Like Bible talks about suffering and greater good and all that, right?' asked Jay while explaining and Kim nodded.

'Well, Nicole isn't a catholic for her joy is just joy. If you can get it, then why not just get it? It's not a bad way to live, but it's not for everyone. Some people need the pain to appreciate the joy more,' said Jay shrugging her shoulders, 'At least that is how I see it. I don't look down on casual sex if it's what you are into, and if not that is okay too.'

Kim smiled at her, 'You make it sound soo simple.'

Jay smiled back at her, 'Isn't it? In the end it's all about how you feel and what feels right. I think Matt just felt right in that moment to do something which felt right, but that doesn't mean he's always that person. He never forced you did he?'

Kim bit her lip, 'No...but isn't that weird? I mean, it's...sex should be about craving, right? If someone already tried it and it felt good wouldn't he want more? Matt never even brought this topic up. I...someone...someone once told me that any other guy would have break up with me for not sleeping with him this long,' she found herself admitting.

Jay frowned, 'Well, whoever said it was just being mean. Just because someone had sex before doesn't mean he is a crazy sex maniac who will jump someone next chance he gets. I mean, Matt probably knows you better than anyone and knows that you're not ready for sex and if you were you would tell him.'

Kim nodded, 'That's actually the most logical explanation. I don't know why am I looking for these reasons against him.'

Jay blinked, 'Okay, I have a question, does this have something to do with why you were at Nicole's party the other day? You're worried he's going to someone else for sex?'

Kim looked at her horrified, 'Don't even say that. It's so horrible to think so ill of Matt. He's the nicest guy I know.'

Jay raised her hands, 'Okay, but you did go there because of something?'

'I was worried someone else might be...flirting with him,' confessed Kim feeling like an idiot for all those things, 'I-I don't know maybe I'm just over thinking everything and making up things which aren't there.'

Jay frowned a bit, 'I don't think you're an idiot for having doubts, and thoughts. It's human.'

'But what kind of human thinks that of her boyfriend?'

'The kind that doesn't trust him?' filled in Jay much to Kim's horror. It was the honest truth. Kim couldn't even get mad because of it, even if she did a bit.

Jay sighed seeing she made her captain upset, 'I'm sorry, Kim, but...it's one thing to get jealous, but this all?' she pointed at the notes, 'This screams deeper issue to me. You're the smartest and nicest person I know. I can't imagine you couldn't just speak with Matt. If you couldn't then there is a problem between the two of you. I'm not saying it to be mean.'

Kim nodded, 'I know.'

Jay took her hand suddenly, 'But that doesn't mean you can't fix it. Talk to Matt, everything can be worked out if you just talk about it.'

Kim watched her for a moment, who knew Jay could be such a good listener and advisor.

'Thanks, Jay.'

'No problem, Kim,' the blonde smiled at her and went to her locker.

'So you and this guy...if you're not talking about sex, how do you know it's on the table?'

Jay stopped pulling things out before she gave her a suspicious smile, 'Oh, we _know_. There are many...uh, hints, and just because we don't talk about it. It doesn't mean I'm not thinking about it. And he is definitely thinking about it too, so...'

The door opened and another girl walked in so Jay stopped talking, but it left Kim wondering about it all.

Kim never even thought having sex. Was it weird?

It was all just getting to her, but like Jay said the only thing she wasn't doing was actually talking with Matt on the issue, so she decided to go to his street and walk with him a bit. It was very weird at first. She felt like she was on a bad date with someone she knew nothing about when in reality Matt was the person who knew her the most so how come it was so awkward now?

Kim sighed finally. She couldn't keep it to herself anymore, 'The girl you were dating over the summer before my freshman year. Did you two have sex?'

Matt stopped in track for a moment before he slowly turned around the darkness of the night made it impossible to read his expression.

'Who told you that?' he asked very slowly.

'I'm asking, not judging,' said Kim.

'Pete, he has such a big mouth,' sighed Matt, and Kim frowned shaking her head. Who care about Pete, right now? She wanted to know the truth.

'Just tell me, Matt.'

'Yes, She…I spent a lot of times with her and I guess we hit it off on some levels. She wasn't like us. She didn't have our values and believes and in a way I think I liked that she was different from what I knew. I went out with her, but we both knew it wasn't serious. We had sex.'

'More than once?'

'What does it matter?'

'Why didn't you tell me?' asked Kim.

'Because of what you're doing right now. You think that just because I had sex with some girl, now you have to do me some favours. It's not like that, Kim. It's not how this works. I love you and if you're not ready then I will just wait. It's simple as that,' he said and Kim felt bad. She felt bad to think the worst of him when he was making so much sense and was actually doing everything for her.

'I…I don't know.'

'About what?' he asked looking at her very sadly.

'I…I just don't know what to do,' spoke the redhead.

'I love you, Kim. I'm not forcing you into anything!'

'I know that,' sighed the girl and walked closer to him, 'But it's not fair that we…it's not fair that you already had sex and now I'm not willing and…It's not fair that I feel bad about this.'

'But-But I'm not saying anything, Kim. Until right now, I didn't even know this was an issue. Tell me what's wrong? Is it that I didn't tell you about the girl or the sex? I knew…I knew in my eyes it meant nothing. It was just one moment of weakness for me. You matter to me, Kim,' he said and put his hands on her shoulders, 'I love you, Kimie. You know that.'

Kim shook her head, 'I just…I can't get it out of my head, Matt.'

'Kim, I don't care about the sex. I care about you if you want we will not sleep together until marriage. If you want that,' he told her squeezing her shoulders.

Kim closed her eyes. She wasn't sure what was the matter, but she…she didn't feel like she wanted anything to do with Matt right now.

'Did it feel good?' she asked and looked up at him, 'To have sex with a stranger?'

He let go of her, 'Honestly, yes, but…it's just sex, Kim. It always feels good for a guy.'

Kim nodded, 'Right. I should…I should go home, Matt.'

Matt took her hand, 'Text me when you get home please. Please, let me know you're home safe, okay?'

Kim nodded and stepped away from him walking home her thoughts gloomy and clouded with feelings she couldn't even explain. What was she thinking would happen if she asked Matt? Did she really think she would get a closure? Maybe in a perfect world, but not here.

It was getting very cold so Kim just rushed to her car and started. She turned on the heat and radio. By the time the first song ended, she started to cry for some reason. Oddly Father Dough came to mind and his Sunday story about reckless drivers, and she pulled the car to the side and full on cried for a couple of moments before she calmed down a bit and chuckled.

Was she insane? Why was she here in the dark crying her eyes out in her car?

She felt the first drops of rain coming down on her on her window. She watched the little drops slide down until they disappeared on the window just as she saw and heard something fall down on her car.

She blinked confused and stepped out of the car looking at the…gun?

She looked up and saw someone large holding another guy on the roof of the building, 'Let me go! Damn it I will fall!'

Kim blinked looking almost hypnotized at the scene. It was too dark to make out any features.

The person seemed to have noticed her because his head titled and then he was gone with the second man.

Kim swallowed a bit and looked at the gun in front of her. She pulled out a handy and carefully took the gun. She couldn't just leave in on the street.

 _What the hell am I supposed to with that?_

Luckily people in a nearby police station knew exactly what to do.

What a weird night.

Still as she went to sleep she thought about it all. There she was crying because of her boyfriend lost his virginity before her to someone else when some vigilante was protecting the town.

Just how selfish and self absorb was she?

She brought up her phone as she was lying in her bed and texted Matt apologizing for her behaviour.

 _I love you_

She wrote at the end of the message, it still felt true in her heart, so they had to work things out.

 _God, please, please...I don't want to die yet._

* * *

Donnie watched as Mikey happily texted with Mo on his phone while they were sitting in the living room. The movie seemed pointless since Mikey was on his phone, Leo was trying _not_ to be too obvious that he was on his phone and Raph looked consumed by his thoughts.

 _Why bother even looking like they were watching?_

He crossed his arms and fixed his eyes on the man who was obviously and idiot running around like crazy when he should have taken that fire extinguisher and use it as a weapon.

Despite the fact that the movie was a C movie in his opinion he was mostly upset about the fact that after the movie he would have to go and reread the texts between Mo and his brother to make sure he didn't slip anything. That was becoming harder and harder with Mo sharing very personal things with Mikey now. Things she probably didn't want people to know. Things like her sleeping with a boyfriend of someone else's.

He didn't realize he was frowning at Leo (who was practically forcing him to do these things), until his oldest brother didn't look at him with a confused face.

He sighed and returned to the stupid movie. Why did he agree to it? Because Raph asked him and Raph never asked for them to watch a movie.

Seriously...

He frowned at his own phone. It should have given him a notification by now. A couple of nights ago, he scared some drug dealer whose gun had fallen of the roof. When he looked down there was a civilian so he couldn't just go and pick it up, but the woman, picked up the gun and as far as he could tell drove to the nearby police station. The gun was put into the system, but until now was not taken admitted into evidence or put as part of the _Get the guns off the street_ collection.

Donnie wasn't sure, but it seemed pretty shady to him. Where did the gun go?

After the movie he decided to dig a bit into the station and make sure nothing bad was going on there.

'Hey, what are you doing?' asked Leo as he walked to his workshop probably to discuss his weird behaviour during the movie.

'Checking something out,' mumbled Donnie has his fingers moved through the keyboard.

Leo stood behind him before he asked, 'Why are you looking into the 45th Precinct?'

Donnie continued to work, 'Just a funny feeling. The gun from last night-'

'The one which the woman took the police station?' asked Leo moving closer.

'Yeah, it got admitted because I hacked into the files, but now it's like lost or something. It's not in the evidence room, or anywhere else,' said Donnie frowning. What could it mean?

'You think the dealer returned for it?' asked Leo sounding very doubtful.

'No, he was a little guy, but this could be something.'

'What?'

Donnie showed him the screen, '565 guns were brought to the police station this year, only 350 are actually in the system. Either in the evidence room or somewhere else.'

Leo frowned, 'And the rest?'

'Missing,' mumbled Donnie and the two shared a look. Something very shady was going on there.

 _Please...God, if you exist, please, don't let her die here._

* * *

Matt was her sweetheart which was why Kim was so confused about his behaviour that day. He has been acting very weird lately. Kim had a feeling he was very upset about something and that something was boiling inside him.

'Anyway, you should have seen Molly, she was so excited about the dress even if she didn't show it and mom totally agreed, that she look stunning in the dress. I think green is her color and should wear things like that more. Aww,' said Kim suddenly and sighed, 'I really wish I could have seen her wear in for those things in the kids' centre.'

Matt groaned suddenly and Kim stopped talking blinking, 'Are you alright? Is it the headache again?'

Matt didn't answer and stopped the car in front of her house. He was picking and dropping her off today.

'Since when are you and Molly Jones bffs, babe?' he asked looking upset which puzzled Kim, 'What do you mean? I didn't even talk about Molly that often, did I?'

'Well, until like last week you never even mentioned Jones and now you're here big sister or something?' he asked the tone of his voice making Kim uncomfortable. The red head shifted nervously in her seat, 'I just wanted to help her out. Why are you so upset about me being friends with her?' Kim wouldn't say that they were friends, but she was really confused why Matt acted like this. She never noticed it before, but seemed to have a problem with Molly Jones because whenever he saw Kim with her or she spoke about her he got all tense and angry for no reason.

'Besides, Molly is not the kind of person you want to spent time with. There are rumours about her-'

'There are rumours about Jay too, and that doesn't mean they are true,' defended her Kim instantly.

Matt rolled his eyes, 'Who knows? Jay isn't the type of person who spills their heart. I have more boys on the team who saw-'

'Yeah, boys who check out her ass and ask her out and when she shots them down, get piss calling her names,' said Kim immediately, 'Don't pretend that isn't true. We hurt them together plenty of times. Why is Jay to blame when she wants them to leave her alone?' asked Kim seriously not understanding why did man have to make up things like that only to get back at girls who weren't interested in them.

'Look, do you even remember that we were supposed to hang out the day you decided to play Samaritan with Molly?' he asked and looked at her very upset.

Kim frowned a bit, 'We never really said we would hang out after school. You could have come after Molly left if you have such a problem with her.'

'Yeah, come for an hour? Or half? Before you had to start doing your chorus or homework which isn't due to next month or something like that?' he almost snapped at her and Kim froze because Matt was never this upset.

'What's...what's going on?'

'What's going on is that you seem to have tone of time for Jay McClaud or Molly Jones or everyone but me. It's like since you know you have me you spent most of your free time to try and win over people you don't have yet,' he said and Kim was left speechless. She honestly didn't know what to say to that. Could it be in a weird way that it was true? She always tried to impress new people sure, but she never thought she was giving up on people she already knew.

'I didn't mean-'

'But you did! What's next? We'll have a date, but you will go out to save _Nicole Diaz_ at a frat party?' he asked shaking his head.

Kim felt like he kicked her when he mentioned Nicole for some reason.

'Look, I'm sorry,' he said suddenly the change so quick it left Kim worried and confused, 'But...I feel like we never spent time together anymore. You said you wanted to work things out, but it really feels like you're punishing me for having sex. If...if you can't get over it maybe we...,' he paused and looked at her.

Kim quickly hugged him hating to see that sad puppy look on his face, 'I'm sorry. I know...I can be like that. I'm...I'm really sorry.'

He hugged her back, but unlike before his hug didn't feel so safe and warm.

'Let's just forget it. My head hurts. I will go home and take some aspirin,' he assured her and smiled at her.

Kim swallowed and nodded.

When he leaned down he kissed her on the lips, but it was like Kim felt something was different between them.

She opened the car door and walked out with her bag ready to head home until she stopped and rushed back to the car, 'Uh, you said...you said your parents are going out tonight.'

He blinked at her looking confused, 'Yeah, party at my aunt's house. They will come home pretty late. Why?'

'I...I will come tonight,' she said feeling her voice shake and not necessarily from the cold December air.

Matt looked shocked before he finally found his voice, 'Uh...are you sure? You know you don't have-'

'I want to,' she said confident as always although she didn't feel like it at all.

'What will you tell your parents?' he asked.

'I'll figure something out,' she assured him and leaned to kiss him again. This time it felt like before. It felt like before the doubts and problems and before all the madness she might have just created in her mind. It felt right.

She smiled at him and walked home her heart speeding up as only once she was safe behind close doors inside her room did she realize what she just wanted to do.

' _Oh, dear Lord._ '

Kim went to overdrive. She started to pace inside her room looking for clothes to wear, then praying, then chickening out, then going and lying to her mom she was going to sleep over at her friend Carmen's house, then pacing some more, praying and then sitting down trying to absorb as many information about sex as was possible in an hour time.

After it was close to eight she realize she was a total idiot and should probably cancelled, but remembered the only thing which seemed to have mattered and cause all of this.

Love.

She loved Matt, and even if she would regret it one day, everything which she did was because of love, so it had to be...right, worth it, the right thing. It would be from love.

She put on black matching underwear looking herself in the mirror realizing apart from girls in the locker room, her parents when she was little, no one had ever see her naked. Now Matt would.

She put on a bluish long sweater dress and her warmest pair of stockings making sure she would be warm enough to walk to Carmen's house and then be picked up by Matt.

When she came to the girls house, she realize she should have ask someone else, since the girl teased her and made her blush multiply times with her comments and remarks. She was horrified when she found out, Carmen even told Ginny which mean most of the cheerleaders would know.

She could have asked Jay, but for some reason she didn't want to. Jay...Jay wouldn't approve of this and Kim knew she didn't need more people to disapprove when she was already not sure about it at all.

Everyone was nervous at their first time, right?

When Matt drove her at his house after Carmen's, Kim felt like she was entering a lion den.

She looked down at her phone and decided to text Jay for some reason. Jay didn't answer.

'You coming?' asked Matt as he opened the door for her, and Kim nodded forcing herself to smile as she entered his house, she had visited so many times before.

'Hey, we could maybe watch a movie first, hm?' he asked and smiled at her. It calmed her down a bit and she nodded. Maybe it would be easy. Maybe it would be...good...

 _God, please, please...I don't want to die yet._

* * *

Donnie was still thinking about his puzzle. Problems like Jay McClaud and Molly Jones were pushed to the darkest corner of his mind as now he was too much focused on how to get more Intel from the 45th Precinct. He was playing with the idea of sending flowers to one of the staff members with a camera and audio to be able to witness what was going on there. He also wanted to go actually inside, but because the place worked 24/7 he would have to think up something to get everyone out to have a look there.

Leo was not pleased with the idea, but he did give Donnie and chance assuming his brain finally figure out how to do it.

They were out on patrol. Leo came a bit later as he was on a date with Jay, whatever and however could Leo and Jay actually be out in the city was beyond Donnie, but he didn't even care about it that much.

When Leo pulled out his phone, Raph rolled his eyes visibly annoyed.

'What the girl can't go five minutes without?' teased Raph, 'Kind of clingy.'

'Shut up,' mumbled Leo before he picked up and took a step away from them to talk in private.

Even Mikey let out an annoyed sigh for once and Donnie tried not to look to guilty since he knew this was about Mo who was apparently talking to her ex boyfriend/not-boyfriend who still had a girlfriend he was apparently cheating on quite a lot. It was turning into quite a soup opera and Donnie hated those, and not hated like Raph who would occasionally stay behind Master Splinter and watch a bit. _No!_ Donnie really hated drama like that. He once again asked himself if he hated drama so much why was _he_ involved in so much of it then?

'Wait, are you sure?' asked Leo suddenly his voice worried. This sort of caused all three to look serious. Donnie should have know something would happen. Leo had to leave Jay to get home on her own since Raph was being a dick about Leo ditching patrol. A girl, alone, at night. Not a good combination from their experience.

'Okay, we'll be there. Don't get too close or let anyone see you,' said Leo and ended the call turning toward them.

'We have to go back. Someone's putting explosives in the subway,' said their older brother.

They all looked confused and worried.

'What? Who told you this? Your girlfriend?' asked Raph putting every hint of questionable into his words.

'What explosives? And how does she know?' asked Donnie already thinking about how to deal with this. Explosives could be fun or total disaster. He spent a lot of time working on himself to be good in deactivating bombs and such, but it was still tricky. He knew he was pretty cocky about his abilities, but also couldn't lie about the possibility that someone might be better than him.

'I don't know, she just said she went down and saw some guys putting something on the subway pillars. I'm guessing it's not a present for people of NY,' said Leo annoyed, 'So what are you coming?'

Mikey raised his hands, 'No need to get defensive, bro. We're coming.'

Leo jumped on the second roof and Mikey followed him immediately. Donnie and Raph went after them.

It was a quick run since they didn't meet up with Leo that long ago. Outside of the subway entrance Donnie spotted a person in Blackish hoodie with a jacket scarf over their face and the hoodie pulled all the way to cover her blonde curls. Donnie was impressed. At least she was smart enough to stay hidden in case someone spotted Leo.

'Probably ugly,' said Raph suddenly to him. He shot him a look to ask if he was seriously when Mikey chuckled, 'Look who's talking.'

Raph went to punch their brother but he jumped away and accidentally crashed into Leo's back.

The brother who caused this found it funny and chuckled while Leo turned around and shot Mikey a glare.

The girl must have thought they were idiots, and she wouldn't be too wrong.

They quickly went inside Jay staying behind probably ordered by Leo not to follow them.

Down they found two guys, one already finished putting on the device which started ticking. Leo quickly signaled them how was doing what and Donnie rushed to the pillar with the bomb on it. Leo came to help which Mikey and Raph were fighting the bad guys.

'What am I doing, Donnie?' asked Leo.

'Hold this,' Donnie told him already pulling out a screwdriver and hairpin (don't judge they're very handy) to work on getting the device to open. He had to admit it was a rather fin bomb almost elegant in Donnie's opinion which meant these people must have a serious reason to do this and not just want to blow things up.

Once the small down opened Donnie noticed a tub with some green liquid inside, he didn't recognize. It didn't ease his nerves one bit.

He quickly continued to work while the other part of his brain was wondering about the liquid. After what felt like too much time had passed, he got it.

Leo smiled at him as the ticking stopped nodding in appreciation of his brother. Their victory was long lived as suddenly Leo noticed someone was standing at the pillar which was covered in the shadows.

'Another one,' mumbled his oldest brother already rushing to the man.

'IT'S A TRAP!' heard Donnie suddenly as Jay ran down the stairs.

'For you my dark lord!' shouted the man in Japanese before he pressed a button on detonator.

Donnie started to run after the man seeing Mikey jumping to cover Jay while Raph rush back down. The man must have pressed the button because all of the sudden everything disappeared from his eyes as tones of rocks fell all around him sending him down to the tracks and into the dark.

 _Please...God, if you exist, please, don't let her die here._

* * *

Kim pushed the boy off of her feeling the uneasiness from her stomach return, 'I think I want to go home now.'

Matt made a grimace and went to hug her again trying to kiss her, 'You're just nervous that's fine.'

She let him kiss her for a moment but something…something didn't feel alright. This was not okay for her. She was wrong. She thought maybe if they get intimate it would fix something which got broken without her realizing, but really? Sex couldn't fix something which was broken in their love…

She pushed him off of her with such force it surprised the both of them. She stood up, 'This wasn't a good idea. I need to go home.'

This didn't feel right. It didn't feel good. She wasn't supposed to be in his house alone with him at this hour. She was supposed to be at home with her parents and sister sleeping it was wait past her bedtime as ridiculous as it sounded.

The boy watched her for a moment before he realized she was serious. He stood up looking at her in disbelieved, 'Are you for real?'

She nodded feeling ashamed of herself for how he said it as she started to gather her things and fix her clothes, 'Jesus you're such a…'

He stopped himself before finishing, and Kim sighed, 'I'm sorry. I just…I'm just not ready. Okay?' she asked hoping he would get it.

She wasn't just some girl. She was…she just didn't feel like giving it away like this. It wasn't like she made a chastity promise to stay a virgin until marriage, but she just wasn't ready to just give it up at sixteen with a boy just because she had a bad feeling they were drifting apart. She wasn't ready. She always believed things like sex and intimacy should be only done with someone you truly care for a love, not just one night stands like many of her friends believed.

Yeah, go ahead make fun of her, but Kim really thought for it to be right and feel good you have to love the person, care for them and do it out of love, not a moment.

'Right? _You're_ not ready. _You_ need time. You. You. _You_ ,' he snapped and stood up, 'You never care about anyone else. You gotta go home to study. You have to take care of your sister. You have to do this. You have to do that. Maybe you should just do you your shit while I go for someone who isn't so self-absorbed bitch like _you_.'

Kim stood there for a moment as if he slapped her. She wasn't even sure where was this all coming from. From changing her mind? From deciding not to sleep with him tonight. They have been together for almost a year years and for what?

She walked to the door and put on her coat, 'Bye, Matt.'

'Yeah, bye, Perfect Kim Sawyer.'

She stopped for a moment in the doorway again before she started to walk down again. She felt like crying, but held it inside at least until she was outside in the cold of the December night. It was dark everywhere. People were slowly getting their porches ready for Christmas holidays. This was her favourite time of the year, yet now she felt…she felt like she wanted to beat the stupid deer on their porch to dead.

Such feelings of rage surprised her, but then again tonight a lot of things surprised her, and not in a good way.

Matt's house wasn't relatively close to the city or her house so she would have to call a cab. She just needed to calm herself down a bit to make sure she wouldn't do something to the car or cry.

Kim started to walk not bothered by the cold just trying to calm down and stop crying. She and Matt never fought and honestly she wasn't even sure if this was fight with her not telling him what the problem was and just leaving.

Her mind went back to everything which happened.

Matt wasn't her first boyfriend, but so far he was the most serious one. She was nine when a boy named Tommy Miller who lived next door asked her to be his date. They played in the backyard and then broke up because he thought she had funny feet. She didn't mind that much and called him a sourpuss. Then there was Eric from their local church he asked her out a couple of times, but Kim had feeling he wasn't all that interested in her just in pleasing his parents who thought she was delightful. He didn't seem too bothered when she stopped accepting his offer to go out. There were a couple of dates here and there, but no one really stuck for too long. Matt was the first one who filled all the boxes on Kim list. He was nice, handsome, from a good family, went to church, and had a good future ahead of him. It wasn't like Kim was a mean princess who only wanted the perfect guy, but she was an overachiever. She always expected the best from herself, her performances, her grades, her well everything. She was pleased with every praise and annoyed with every imperfections so it made sense when Matt started to ask her out she…well fell for him hard. Everyone was so pleased with him, and she was glad she found someone who shared her goals and interests. She knew she loved him. He was the first guy with who she didn't feel weird like he wasn't the right match for her. He was just…perfect in every way. Was perfection something she always wished to achieve? The sole goal of her struggles and trying and hard work?

As she walked down the street she realized she had no idea where she was now. How long has she been walking?

Sighing to herself she decided to go and take a subway train to the nearest stop by her house.

She went down the stairs to the benches. She was the only person there which made the whole place feel a bit creepy. She has taken subways before but never this late. She decided to check out her phone to ease her nerves.

Nicole posted a couple of pics with Jill and bunch of other people from her school. They went to a club in town. She knew of it because before she decided to go to Matt's he thought about going there since she was supposed to be busy.

Nicole always looked so…happy. Like she was having the time of her life. Yes, she was drunk and maybe high but she was grinning into the camera with Jill by her side. They both looked so happy…alive.

When she looked at her insta she could see there were now more pictures of her and Jay too. The two girls were also looking quite happy. She didn't even remember ever seeing the blonde smile like that before until she and Nicole started to be friends again.

Would this kind of life make her happy too? Partying with the rest of her classmates? Ditching?

Somehow she doubted it.

The train stopped at the station and Kim got up and went to sit inside.

It would take a couple of moments for it to start. She picked a seat and started to look down at her phone again. She had to be quiet not to wake up her mother. It wouldn't be nice if she woke up to find her coming home at this hour. She would have questions and would see through her like she always did. Not to mention she lied. She liked to her about going to Carmen, who now probably told everyone she and Matt had sex. She felt so disgusted with herself all of the sudden.

For some reason she turned around only to see someone being thrown across the subway hall outside of the train.

She stood up as the train slowly moved in from its place and she saw something large and green in the hall.

She didn't even have time to process it before suddenly she caught glimpse of someone standing at the stairs to the subway and the whole subway collapsed on top of the train and her.

 _God, please, please...I don't want to die yet._

* * *

' _I don't think this is a good idea,' said a male's voice as the girl was in her costume dancing with the rest of the girls on stage._

 _She looked up from her position to behind the stage. It was her first performance in their dance class and she was very excited about it._

' _Relax, bro, it will be fine,' said another voice suddenly and she realized someone was there. Some little boys maybe?_

' _Are you sure?'_

' _No he is not sure. Knock it off Raph, you'll hurt him,' said a third voice._

* * *

Donnie woke up to the sound of ringing. Ringing was never a good sign. Their father found him a book the other day about different types of injuries and illnesses.

Ringing in the ears usually meant you were exposed to a very high sound like and explosion or he got hit over the head pretty hard.

It was the later, as once again he got into the middle between Raph and Leo's bricking and ended up getting hit. It hurt, but he didn't cry just put his hand over his head trying to stood up.

' _Jesus, Donnie, I'm sorry, please don't tell Master Splinter,'_ begged Raph while Leo rushed to his side and started to help him up only when he finally reached him Donnie didn't feel his little hands on his arm and shell.

He finally opened his eyes and took in his surroundings. He wasn't in their lair playing or training and he wasn't nine anymore.

Based on his surroundings his mind quickly reminded him of what really happened. They were out on patrol when Jay, Leo's girlfriend, called him saying someone was putting a bomb down in a nearby subway station. They rushed over and indeed two masked man were putting on explosions at the main pillars of the subway.

He and Leo took it upon themselves to stop the explosions while Raph and Mikey went to catch them.

The problem was that they fail to notice the third bomb and the subway collapsed. He barely caught glimpse of Raph flying through the air while all of the sudden everything went black.

He coughed out some dust and probably a bug and something he tried not to analyze too much.

He looked around before he pulled out his flashlight. The pillars holding the roof collapsed and basically buried him inside.

As far as he could tell this was no way to go, so he had to go the other way to the train which was crashed on the side and the back it completely scattered all over the tracks.

He started to walk there wondering if he should start calling for his brothers when he heard a fainted, ' _Help._ '

He blinked and started to walk toward the sound feeling his head and side hurting badly. Definitely some broken ribs.

As he got closer he heard.

 _Our Father,_ _  
_ _Who art in heaven,_ _  
_ _hallowed be Thy name;_ _  
_ _Thy kingdom come;_ _  
_ _Thy will be done on earth as it is in heaven._ _  
_ _Give us this day our daily bread;_ _  
_ _and forgive us our trespasses_ _  
_ _as we forgive those who trespass against us;_ _  
_ _and lead us not into temptation,_ _  
_ _but deliver us from evil. Amen._

He recognized it as a common catholic prayer.

Was that Jay? He thought he heard her on the stairs shouting something, but maybe the blast threw her to the side as well.

He frowned as it seemed unlikely based on where she was standing and the place of explosion. The trajectory was all wrong.

It was coming from the crashed train so he got inside before quickly hiding behind the corner.

There was a woman, who was not Jay. He didn't see much, but he saw the red hair and long coat which was not how Jay looked or what she was wearing.

'Is-is someone there?' asked the girl with a worried voice, 'Please, I…I need help…I'm hurt.'

He closed his eyes hearing the pain in her voice. She was sitting down when he saw her and since she didn't start walking something must have been very wrong with her.

He felt torn. His instincts were at war. On one hand, he wanted to stay hidden from a human, an intruder, who would most likely scream and call him a monster. On the other hand, she was a hurt woman in a collapsed subway, and she needed help.

'Please,' she begged her voice breaking a bit.

With his eyes still closed, and decision nowhere to come and called back, 'W-what? What happened?'

She let out a gasp or something and for a moment he thought she saw him before she sobbed, 'One of the metals stabbed my thigh…I can't move.' The gasp was probably due to the pain and not his appearance. Not yet at least.

'Can you help me please?' she asked.

'Miss…I'm not what you think I am,' he said not sure even what he was saying.

She was quiet for a moment so he continued.

'I don't…look like you and you might freak out,' he said and after a moment the woman said, 'I have a sharp metallic piece inside my leg, at this moment I don't care what you look like.'

Well, that was a quick change, but to be fair it would sound to him illogical as well if he was hurt and someone would refuse to help him because they would claim they look ugly.

Sighing he nodded to himself and got out up on the train slowly making his way to the woman.

She raised her head to look at him as she must have heard the sound and…nothing. She didn't scream, she didn't tell him to stay back or anything, she just sat there looking at him with her coat ripped and dirty, her hair even in a ponytail a bit messy and her face red and wet from tears.

As he walked closer he realized she wasn't a grown up woman, but more likely a teenager like him.

'H-hi.'

 _Please...God, if you exist, please, don't let her die here._


	16. The Perfect Girl 04

**The Perfect Girl**

* * *

 _The beauty of the world lies in the diversity of its people._

* * *

'H-hi,' said Donnie awkwardly, but the girl just kept on looking at him speechless. Since it was too uncomfortable to look at her as she was staring at him like this, he looked at her leg instead, immediately spotting the metal sticking out of it. Well, this was not good.

He kneeled down and almost reached to touch her before he stopped himself.

 _What are you doing? This is a stranger girl and you are a mutant turtle. It is not okay to just start touching her like that._

'May I?' he asked but she just started at him for a moment.

She was definitely in shock.

'Uh, miss?' he coughed a bit uncomfortable.

'It's not a costume,' said the girl and looked down at his body kind of how he imagined he looked when he got a hold of some new technology or discovery.

'No, it's not,' he said slowly waiting for what she would do. Apparently it helped her forget about the situation because she tried to lean closer only to closer her eyes and let out a soft cry most likely from the pain.

He quickly put his hand on her covered arm just as she touched his for support. A moment had pass like this with both of them holding one another until the pain must have became bearable and the girl opened her eyes to look at his arm that she was touching.

She watched it for a moment her face unreadable before she looked up at him, 'Who are you?'

 _Who…not what._

He shook his head, 'Just…someone who wants to help.'

He nodded at her injured leg, 'Can I have a look?'

She nodded let go of his arm. It was odd, but the lack of contact caused him to feel cold all of the sudden. He must have hit his head far more than he expected. Sometimes it could cause damage to the receptors.

He carefully examined the leg and the sharp metal inside it, while noticing that she was still watching him closely. He tried not to look back at her and focus on his examination. Raptures of skin and tissue were never good, but as long as the object stays inside the girl had a very high survival chance.

'D-do you have a name?' she asked softly and unsure.

He finally allowed himself to look at her for a moment, 'Donnie, it's short for Donatello.'

 _Why the shell would you tell her that?_

 _Now, she would know your name and people would know she knows your name._

He felt like groaning at himself. Maybe it was the blow he got to his head. He wondered how injured his brothers were behind the wall of rocks.

'I'm Kim. It's short from Kimberly,' she said suddenly and he looked at her confused before the both of them chuckled a bit at how awkward it all seems.

He slowly tried to examine her leg without touching it too much or moving it. She was dressed in a long coat, but along with her dress and tights it was pretty ripped and dirty now.

She hissed once when he touched the skin where the tights were ripped.

'Sorry,' he mumbled frowning at the injury.

'It's fine,' she said all too quickly, 'You're hands are a bit cold though.'

He gave her an apologizing look and returned to the task. The wound looked bad but the fact that she was still conscious was a good thing.

'Okay, it looks…doable. We just have to make sure it won't get pull out because-'

'It helps hold the cut vessel closed and applies pressure on arteries and veins to keep me from bleeding out,' she cut him off suddenly completely catching Donnie off guard.

She looked a bit away a bit red and probably not just from the cold air in the subway, 'Sorry.'

He shook his head actually smiling, 'No, that's good. You're spot on. You study medicine?'

She shook her head, cringing her nose as for a second she must have felt the pain again. 'No, I'm in high school but I want to get to med school later.'

Donnie felt himself smiling for a moment, 'Okay, so you're into medical things. How about you tell me what to do now?'

He asked already lifting her leg a bit to help with the blood flow.

She blinked and looked up at him before she started, 'I need to stabilize it I think.'

'I think it is stuck deep inside. You can tell by the way you are not bleeding more from the corners of the wound,' he spoke pointing at them and Kim looked from the wound to his face again.

'Looks, like I'm not the only medical enthusiast,' she said and smiled. She had…a very honest smile. Donnie doubted he ever saw someone smile so honestly and purely at him before. Definitely not a girl like her. Except well maybe...April.

He shook his head. Now was not the time to think about April, he had to make sure the girl would be alright.

'Yeah, so, uh, what next?' he asked trying to focus on the task again.

'We need something to tie around my leg to keep me from losing blood?' she asked, but it was like she hesitated.

'Sounds good,' he immediately noticed her scarf and pointed at it, 'Something like that maybe?'

She looked down at it before she pulled the scarf down and hand it to him. He took it feeling just how light and silky it was. As he used it to tie it around her leg above the wound, it was the first time he realized she might have a concussion.

He let go of her leg and looked at her face. She was watching him the whole time, it appeared.

She let made a grimace, 'I'm sorry. That's rude.'

'It's fine. I would have stared as well,' he said trying to keep the venom out of his mouth. Of course she would stare. He was a talking giant turtle. He would stare too if he saw one which wasn't his brothers. He watched strange things as well. He was a scientist and inventor after all, even if he was missing the degree.

She shook her head quickly and said quietly, 'It's not like that.'

He looked at her, 'You're just…I never saw anyone like you. A-are there more peo-like you?' she blushed a bit, 'I'm sorry I don't know what you like to be called.'

'It's not about what we like to be called, it's about what we are,' he said and she looked sad like she thought she offended him in a way.

He shook his head, 'Turtles, and it's classified.'

She nodded, 'Understood.'

'We need one more,' he said and the girl, Kim looked at him shyly again, 'We could use your mask?'

After the question echoed around them they were silent for a moment. Why did it made such a great meaning to it? It was a piece of fabric. It wasn't like she would now see his true identity. He was a giant turtle.

He nodded and went to undid it, but somehow it felt stuck. The knot felt too tight to undo all of the sudden. What the shell? He never had a problem to get it off before so why now?

'May I?' asked Kim softly smiling a bit at him. She looked so honestly kind and good, he couldn't even feel bad about not being able to do it himself.

He nodded shortly and leaned closer so she wouldn't lean too much. He was close to her before but now he could fully caught the light perfume, her human scent, blood, and something distantly familiar he couldn't place.

She was quick as she undid the knot on the mask. When she was done however she didn't move away immediately. Instead she looked at him for a moment very slowly letting the mask slide off of his face. For some reason doing this so felt very intimate. To see his eyes and be this close to him felt...unlike anything Kim ever felt before. She felt her heart speeding up at the look and colour of his eyes.

 _They're so soft._

'What?' asked Donnie just a little bit louder than a whisper.

Kim felt her cheeks going hot the pain now just a dull reminder in the back of her mind, 'Your eyes...they're nice.'

He looked at her in a strange way and she wondered if maybe she didn't lose too much blood and wasn't hallucinating. She just said a turtle he had nice eyes.

She leaned a bit lower carefully tying down the mask below the wound. A very strange thought crossed her mind about how both her scarf and his mask were tied close to each other as if they were somehow symbolizing them.

She remembered how people use to tie their arms during weddings and blushed for some reason. Why was she having such thoughts was beyond her.

'Do you know how to get us out?' asked the redhead and the turtle shook his head, 'Unfortunately not yet, but please have patience I got a pretty nasty blow.'

She smiled a bit and let her soft fingers touch his forehead being a bit more concerned about the bruise there, 'I can see that.'

Donnie looked nervous all of the sudden and leaned away.

Kim gave him an awkward smile before she looked away feeling embarrassed.

 _Kim, this is not a petting zoo. Control yourself…_

'The place I came from is too damaged and covered with rocks so I will go that way, okay?' he asked her suddenly and she nodded.

'I'll be here,' she motioned at her leg and he grimaced before walking.

She watched him go feeling a strange uneasiness as he was slowly fading from her view.

'Be careful!' she called at him before biting her lip.

 _Donatello..._

He turned around and waved at her before he continued to walk her heart still not at ease. Once he was fully gone she looked around her surroundings. She was trapped inside her subway, with a turtle man…mutant, alien?

She looked back to where he left off wondering briefly if maybe he wouldn't leave her…or if he wasn't just a hallucination caused by the blow to the head she got when the train went to the ground.

She looked back down at her leg and touched the purple eye mask. The fabric made sure that she wouldn't give into doubts. Donnie was out there looking for a way out for them.

'Donatello.' A renaissance sculptor. Strangely, she didn't find the name weird for someone like him. For a being like him. The way he spoke all soft and how delicate yet skilled his hands were. She had a feeling he was someone who worked with his hands.

Kim leaned back against the wall of the train and started to pray again knowing God would save them.

 _God, please, please...I don't want to die yet._

* * *

Donnie cursed mentally as the other side turned out to be a dead end as well. He looked back to the train wondering what to do about Kim. Her wound was okay for now, but he had no idea if she didn't suffer some internal bleeding or if how long would she last without proper medical attention.

He went to the collapsed wall which separated the subway from the hallway and staircase. It was most likely that all his brothers, and Leo's Jay were behind the mountain of rocks trying to get to him.

He stopped walking and tried carefully to listen to his surroundings. Apart from the water drops from a broken pipe and an occasional piece of rock falling down there was nothing.

Great. Just his luck.

He looked at the train again. He was gone for a while now without any luck, he should get back to Kim in case she was freaked out all alone.

When he got to the train he once again found her praying with her hands held together and eyes closed.

Some metal shifted under his leg which caused the redhead to open her eyes and look at him blinking, 'Oh, you're back.'

Donnie didn't understand how could this girl say it with just joy, but maybe it was the fact that at least she wasn't alone down here.

'Unfortunately the other side is also collapsed. We're prisoners here for now,' he said as a matter of fact and watched as a worry crossed Kim's face for a moment before she smiled again and took a deep breath, 'Okay, then, we will just have to wait. I know we'll get out.'

'Okay? So someone is an optimist?' he chuckled looking around.

'Well, we survived the collapse of the roof I'm sure we will get out of here. He will get us out,' she said with confidence and shrugged her shoulders.

Donnie looked down at her. He could blame it on the head injury, but it took him a moment to realize what she meant.

'You think _God_ will get us out?' he asked. Even if it wasn't his intention it was clear he was mocking the idea.

Kim grimaced and looked away making him feel bad for offending her.

'It…it doesn't matter if you believe in God or something else…but you can't doubt that there is a higher power after everything which happened and still kept you alive,' she said nodding to herself.

Donnie walked closer to her and sat down opposite from her. However, this time much further keeping a formal distance between them.

'So you think that God what? Made you come here today?' he asked and nodded at her leg, 'Got you injured?'

'Maybe,' she shrugged her shoulders.

'Now, why would he do that? You're a good…catholic? If there is a God why would he cause you to get hurt?'

'Maybe just to meet you,' she said with a smile catching him completely off guard. It made him uncomfortable all of a sudden how nice and calm she was around him. She was…she was a sight for a sore eye and just so nice…and he…she shouldn't be nice to him and say things like that.

'Why would you need to meet me?'

'I don't know yet, maybe I will never know, but the bottom line is if I did anything different today, I would have been somewhere else right now and not here with you…broken leg or not, I can't pretend like _this_ ,' she pointed between herself and him right now, 'doesn't mean anything.'

Donnie watched her not sure what to say. He didn't even know if there was anything to say to that.

'I…I don't know what to think about that Kim. I'm…I'm a scientist. God doesn't hold much meaning to me.'

'Okay, what does then?'

'Science. Life form, molecules…'

'What about this? How do you explain that you are here with me today, right now?' she asked and he sighed, 'Well, night patrol, my brother's girlfriend seeing something suspicious, some terrorists who got lucky. You apparently havening a bad night if you rather take a subway in the middle of the night then sleep in a warm bed,' he said shaking her head, 'I'm sorry, but God isn't my thing really. I just don't believe things happen for a reason, and I can't accept punishment for being happy or suffering but being happy about it. No one wants bad things to happen to them, not even for some supposedly God,' he said feeling himself heating up at their argument. 'How could someone...exist who would purposely want people to suffer just to worship him at his alter? Not to mention the whole evolution and creation of the universe. You want to study medicine. Be a scientist in a way. How can you believe in something you have no proof of?'

'My love for medicine doesn't preclude my faith to God. For me, science is another language we use to talk about the same miracles that Christians talk about.'

Donnie snickered, 'Yes when one language makes sense and one doesn't.'

Kim was quiet for a moment, and Donnie realized he might have offended her with his outburst, he was about to apologize when the girl said, 'So you can perfectly explain everything to me? Can you explain quantum physics? Or how is it possible that the Earth's size is perfect. The Earth's size and corresponding gravity holds a thin layer of mostly nitrogen and oxygen gases, only extending about 50 miles above the Earth's surface. If Earth were smaller, an atmosphere would be impossible, like the planet Mercury. If Earth were larger, its atmosphere would contain free hydrogen, like Jupiter. Earth is the only known planet equipped with an atmosphere of the right mixture of gases to sustain plant, animal and human life. Scientists are convinced that our universe began with one enormous explosion of energy and light, which we now call the Big Bang. This was the singular start to everything that exists: the beginning of the universe, the start of space, and even the initial start of time itself?'

He shook his head, 'So you think that the world was designed by so God who likes to see his people suffer?'

'The God not like to see people suffer-'

'Says the girl with an injured leg in a collapsed subway?'

She felt her cheek go hot again but this time from something else.

'So what you're saying there is a bad God?'

'No, I'm saying...,' he cut himself closing his eyes and shaking his head. Arguing with a catholic girl was not what his idea of spending the night.

'Forget it,' he shook his head feeling a bit dizzy all of the sudden.

Kim's face went softer, 'Sorry, uh...I'm not usually pushing my belief on people. I just believe.'

'I get that. I'm sorry too, I shouldn't have started anything-'

He stood up suddenly without finishing his words as he suddenly realized what was wrong with him. Something was in the air.

'What?' asked Kim and turned to look where Donnie's eyes were focused.

* * *

Kim didn't know what was going on, but the way Donnie got all silent all of the sudden make her nervous. She blinked a couple of times realizing slowly that her vision was getting a bit blurry.

He frowned and without a single word turned toward her, 'I think we should try to move.'

'But you said the tunnels on both sides are blocked,' mumbled Kim confused now feeling a small headache forming inside her head.

'I know,' he said and kneeled in front of her.

'What's the matter?' she asked feeling panic rising in her voice.

'I don't know, but something is in the air. It doesn't smell right and it's making us both dizzy. Come one,' he said before he stopped himself and looked into her eyes, 'Can I pick you up?'

Kim giggled at how shy he looked, 'So you're ready to go to war with me about religion and God, but _this_ makes you nervous?'

He shrugged his shoulders and even despite the dim light of train lights and his olive green colour, she could tell he was blushing a bit, 'Well, to question your opinions and argue or discuss them is because we are equals so I should respect you as such, but when it comes to touching you, I think I should keep in mind you are a girl and respect you as such as well.'

Kim watched him for a moment before she nodded realizing she spaced a bit. It was...it was a kind of the nicest thing a guy ever did for her. To ask her if he could.

'Uh, thank you for respecting me then,' she said hoping she wasn't blushing. Why did it made her heart speed up like that? People were nice to her all time, she was use to it. Be kind and receive kindness.

'You can lift me up, Donnie,' she told him as he still didn't touch her.

He nodded and very carefully making sure he wouldn't cause her leg to move too much lifted her up in his arms like she was weightless.

'Oh,' she let out startled as she was suddenly up in the air.

'Are you okay?' he asked, 'Is it the leg?'

She shook her head, 'No, I just felt my head spinning for a moment.'

It was strange to be lifted like this. During cheerleading she was sometimes thrown into the air with two or three girls supporting her and making sure she was okay, but this was one person holding her like she was light as a feather.

'Please put your arms around my neck, so you don't fall,' he said breaking her train of thoughts.

She easily obeyed, but she doubted he would drop her. She felt very...safe in his arms like this. Kim wasn't a person who often felt unsafe. Even when she found a gun, or witness a robbery, it just wasn't in her nature to feel unsafe in the world. She was a believer, and in her heart she knew if something happened God would find a way to protect her. Even now, even if Donnie didn't understand it, Kim knew he was keeping her safe. She couldn't have been there all alone, but instead she was there with Donnie, who was carrying her now out of the train to keep her safe.

* * *

'How strong are you?' asked the redhead.

'Define strong?' he asked carrying her outside.

'Could you lift a car?'

'Given the right amount of adrenaline a lot of people can lift a car,' he said looking around and thinking about where to go with her. He didn't like this.

He carefully set her down again and returned to the train. Since it was already pretty damaged it wasn't too hard to pull one of the walls to cover the train's entrance. It wouldn't be much help, but it would be something. He looked back at the rocks between him and most likely his brothers.

'Well, looks like I should start. Let me know if you feel worse,' said Donnie, and Kim nodded.

'How about you talk to me about something?' he asked as he started to slowly remove the rocks to the side as if he was playing jenga making sure the rocks he pulled wouldn't cause other rocks to fall down.

'So I wouldn't be completely useless right now?' asked the girl behind him and he shook his head hoping she wasn't pitying herself now. Despite Kim being obviously nice and sweet, he wasn't the right type of person for tears or girls mood swings.

'Being injured doesn't mean being useless,' he said and the girl sighed.

Since she was quiet for a while he thought she decided to stay quiet before she said, 'Hey, uh, did you by any chance saved a little girl with red hair like mine?'

This caused Donnie to pause, 'Uh, what?'

'She's six and she has long red hair. She said a turtle hero saved her when she fell on the tracks while my mom was being mugged,' explained Kim.

Donnie turned around to look at her. It was like a half a year ago so it was hard to remember what the little girl with the wide smile look like but Kim could have been a close relative.

'Your little sister?'

'Her name is Abby. She wouldn't stop talking about you. I didn't think you were real, but thank you for saving her,' said Kim with a kind smile.

'I'm glad she's okay,' he said and returned to his task in hand.

'So now you officially saved all the Sawyer girls,' she said and he tried not to put the surname into his mind for some reason.

Great, now he knew her full name which meant now he would try to look her up after she was safe. This wouldn't be good.

* * *

Kim looked down at her leg again. She was worried. The leg hurt but she could take it for now. She was more worried about the strange gas as well as how would her leg work afterwards. She was a cheerleader, a dancer. She loved dancing if she wouldn't be able to...

'Maybe this is my punishment,' she mumbled suddenly before she could catch herself.

Donnie slowed his pace for a moment, 'What do you mean? What would you get punish for?'

'I don't know,' she lied looking down at her leg. She was about to have sex with her boyfriend and lied to her parents about where she was. She wondered about Matt, would he blame himself for letting her leave. She left almost stormed out without a single goodbye so it was a fight. She suddenly realized something...was it a fight though?

'Hey, uh, if...if a girl...your girlfriend walked out on you,' she started before she realize that this was a giant turtle vigilante she was about to ask for dating advice.

She knew she was asking the wrong person when Donnie all of a sudden turned around giving her a weirdout look.

She blushed knowing she made a fool out of herself, 'Sorry, uh, it's nothing.'

'What?' he asked slowly seemingly just as uncomfortable as she felt. Then why was he even asking?

'Nothing!' she said quickly. This was definitely not the discussion she should have with him.

'Okay,' he said and returned to work, but Kim bit her lips. Maybe it was because of so many things she left unsaid and so many lies and secrets she had tonight that she just let out.

'Well, it's just...if your girlfriend found out you had...a girlfriend before her and she said that you could work on your relationship and go to your house knowing your parents weren't there, but then sort of not feel okay about it and leave, would that mean she was not okay with you having a girlfriend? I mean it's not like you could somehow built a time machine like or take the TARDIS and go back in time and not have a girlfriend...why would she be upset then?' she stopped talking as she realized.

'This makes no sense to you probably,' she said and heard a soft chuckle from him, 'Not at all.'

Kim chuckled as well before she sobered up and continued to talk, 'Well, if this girlfriend would then storm out of your house after a fight about...the things you did with your first girlfriend, which she thought she wanted to do but then decided she didn't want to do, would you think it's a fight or a break up?' she asked and let her hands hug her shoulders. She was starting to feel a bit cold.

Donnie shook his head as he sat another rock to the ground.

'So much for it being nothing,' he said and Kim let out a whiny sound, 'Well, yeah, it's...not nothing.'

'Did you really have a fight with your boyfriend about not wanting to...sleep with him?' he asked not turning around to face her though.

She bit her lip again watching him and feeling very embarrassed now that she actually discussed such things with him, 'Sort of...I mean it was also me being still upset about him sleeping with someone before me without telling, and me not having enough time for him and putting other people first and not forgiving him about his first girlfriend and well...other things, but yes also that.'

She started to brush her arms to warm up a bit. It was getting colder in the tunnel.

Donnie was quiet for a moment, but he wasn't working anymore, 'Well, when you say all this doesn't it sound like you two have a bit more issues than just...tonight?'

Kim looked down at her leg again for some reason it helped to see a current problem not to feel so emotion about her relationship problems.

'Yes, it does, but it's just the bad things. There is so much more good things. We're dating for almost a year and half now and he's...he's a Catholic like me, and he's just so nice and good...Not sure if you meet a lot of boys from high schools but they're not so nice,' said Kim and tried to pull her coat closer to her body.

Donnie didn't move, 'And you love him?'

Kim stopped and looked up at him completely surprised.

'Y-yes, I love him,' she said her teeth starting to chatter a bit as she realized this was the first time she ever didn't mention it when she was talking about him. What did it mean? It wasn't that she didn't love him anymore, or was it? Maybe she just hurt her head too much...she wanted to have sex with him and lied to her parents about it so how could she want that and in the next moment not love him? It was ridiculous.

'I'm cold,' she said finally as she didn't know what to say to Donnie anymore.

* * *

Donnie turned around looked down at Kim as her breath was visible. The temperature dropped rapidly now. He looked at his own hands. When he was putting the rocks away he was moving so he was warming himself up, but now he could feel it.

She looked up at him her teeth hitting each other chattering, 'A-aren't you cold?'

'I'm better at dealing with this than you,' he said frowning and alarmed. Why was is so cold suddenly? The strange gas smell was gone, but the cold was suspicious.

'Oh,' she said nodding to herself her. She raised her shaking hand trying to touch her lips, 'I feel like I just ate three popsicles at once.'

Donnie frowned and went to one of the broken train seat which was left thrown outside the train. He ripped the seat cover and walked to Kim putting it around her, 'Here.'

'T-thank you, Donnie.'

He nodded at her and went back to trying to work on the rocks when all of the sudden some rocks fall down making the pile even larger.

'Damn it,' he groaned upset. All that work for nothing. He took in a couple of deep breaths to calm down. This was useless. Now he could clearly tell the whole tunnel was freezing, but how. He would have gone to the place of the explosion came from, but he wasn't feeling good about leaving Kim on her own.

He turned back to look at her, and she looked up at him again her cheeks and nose getting red from the cold, 'Could you maybe...uh...hug me?'

His eyes widened as his throat got small, 'Uh, I don't know if that's a good-'

'Right, sorry, I'm never that forward, I'm just very...-'

'In the absence of warm?' he asked and Kim looked up at him before she chuckled and nodded, 'Yeah.'

He tried to calm down and rational it, that despite it being on sharing heat, it would not be a good idea. She was...a pretty teen female and he...it wouldn't be okay, but she was cold. But it wouldn't right. His dilemma went on and off again, until he noticed how her lips were turning into blue.

Kim was a bit startled as suddenly Donnie sat down next to her and lifted her up, 'Don't panic.'

He sat her down into his lap, putting his arms around her, his chest against her back. He easily started to brush her limps making sure he wouldn't disturb the leg too much.

'Do you think it's the gas which came from the explosive?' asked Kim her up and bottom teeth hitting each other.

'Yes, but I'm not sure what is the outcome of making the subway turn to ice,' he said frowning. Why would terrorist made a subway tunnel explode and then freeze? This made no sense.

He pulled her a bit closer ignoring the way his own body was warming up from having a female this close to him. Luckily his mind was working on overdrive trying to solve it.

'Maybe...they wanted no witness,' said Kim but with the chatter her words were almost hard to translate.

'If they thought someone would be there maybe they wanted to make sure people would freeze if they survive the explosive,' said Kim shaking in his arms.

'Maybe,' said Donnie and frowned, 'He shouted in Japanese.'

'Hm?' asked Kim her voice barely louder than a whisper.

'The terrorist spoke in Japanese,' said Donnie feeling his own teeth chattering. Cold wasn't something unfamiliar to him and his family. They lived in the sewers and every Winter it was almost a battle of life and death until they were old and smart enough to think up ways to make it warmer in their home. Since they were turtles, winter was a time for them to be less active, since they were however mutant turtles who protected the city, they still had to go out at least until the cold got too much for their bodies to handle as well.

'K-kim?' he asked after a moment as the girl didn't speak.

'KIM!' he said shaking her a bit before he realized she must have fallen asleep.

'No-no-no! Kim, wake up!' he started to shake her not caring if he was being too violent with her.

'If we fall...asleep,' he felt his own body losing the battle with the cold quickly as well, 'We'll freeze to death.'

This was in no way normal. He lived for years in winter cold sewers of NY until he built a heater to warm the place up which meant this was something else.

 _Please...God, if you exist, please, don't let her die here._

* * *

'Donnie?' asked Mikey all of the sudden and Donnie blinked looking up at him.

'Don't be such a scary turtle. Please, Donnie, please!' whined Mikey in front of him. He was trying to get him to go with him to investigate the tunnel for some time now. He knew he was his brother's favourite partner in these adventures since Raph would argue and fight with him all the time, and Leo was a party breaker with his honour and don't do anything which Master Splinter forbidden attitude.

'Okay, but not too far, you know Master Splinter said some people came to fix something not far from here. We have to be careful,' warned him Donnie.

'No, problem, Donnie. You're the best,' said Mikey and jumped at him for a hug. Even at the age of ten Mikey was still the biggest kid out of all of them.

They walked for what felt like hours Mikey trying to light up the mood with his ridiculous jokes, not funny, but ridiculous at how unfunny they were.

'Hey, how about...?' asked Mikey, but Donnie didn't hear him as he suddenly sensed someone was closer.

He looked behind him, but instead of another tunnel in the sewer he found a large curtain revealing something which looked like a theatre stage.

There was even music coming out of it.

Ten year old Donnie blinked walking closer to it. He could see people dancing behind it. No...not people little girls dressed as ballerinas.

'Donnie,' said Mikey, 'You know we have to go to that tunnel.'

Donnie shook his head, 'No, Mikey, don't you know what will happen. They will see us and...no Mikey. Don't.'

'Donnie, but we have to,' said Mikey and Donnie turned around to look at Mikey who had a sad smile on his cute kid face, 'This already happened to us.'

'Donnie?' asked another voice and he turned around only to find a little girl looking at him from behind the curtain. She was so small with bright red hair. It took him a moment but he finally recognized her.

'Kim.'

The girl blinked and looked down at her leg just as he did. Her left leg was staring to bleed and Kim started to breath fast, 'I fell asleep. Donnie. W-we fell asleep!' she said all panicked.

He shook his head as it was slowly coming back to him. This already happened. Now he was in the subway with Kim and they were freezing to death because of the gas which came from the explosion device which went off.

He looked up at Kim who looked very panicked. They needed to wake up right now.

He tried to take a step toward her just as she tried to step toward him.

'Donnie, I don't feel so good.'

Wake up, wake up, wake up, wake up, wake up, wake up, wake up, wake up, wake up, wake up, wake up, wake up, wake up, wake up, wake up, wake up, wake up...

WAKE UP!

* * *

Donnie woke up with a start as Leo and Mikey were pulling him out of into the hallway of the subway. He looked around alarmed until he finally spotted Kim lying inside Jay's lap who was slowly stroking her.

His relief was momentary as he realized the girl wasn't awake.

'What happened?' he asked but it didn't sounded right as he felt his whole mouth was frozen.

'She's unconscious,' mumbled Jay pulling her as closer to her as possible while brushing her body for friction.

'What happened? Why is cold like in the North Pole there?' asked Mikey stepping away from the cold.

'Inside the explosives was a tube with some gas. We have to fill the hole because it's spreading everywhere,' said Donnie taking one last look at Kim's almost blue face from the cold before he rushed to the hole his brothers made and quickly covered it with rocks on the side.

'She's like ice,' said Jay worried.

Once the hole was covered, they started to hear noises from above.

'The firemen must be working to get here,' said Leo, 'We have to leave soon. They will take Kim to the hospital,' he went to Jay and kneeled in front of her putting his hand on her shoulder, 'She'll be fine.'

Jay nodded before at each of them, 'Okay, how will you guys get out?'

Donnie went to partly ruined pillar where he left the deactivated explosion. He took what was left of it as well as the undamaged tube, it was their only luck which saved the hall from being frozen as well.

'If they ask, just...'

'Don't worry, I won't tell them anything which would lead back to you,' he heard Jay tell Leo who nodded at her.

He let go of her shoulder and nodded at his brothers, 'We need to try and go through the other side of the tunnel. Hopefully the people who are coming will be too occupied with Jay and Kim to try and look there.'

Mikey raised his fist, 'Let's just leave already.'

Donnie took one last look at Kim lying unconscious in Jay's arms before he jumped to the other side of the hallway his brothers quickly following.

He couldn't help feeling like he didn't get a chance to say good bye to her.

* * *

Kim felt like she was flowing. She felt like all around her was darkness and she was flowing inside it. She wasn't cold anymore or warm. In fact she didn't feel anything, she just flowed. This wasn't heaven, but it wasn't hell either, it was just..darkness...absence of light. She didn't know how much time had passed, it felt like it was only a moment and yet an eternity.

And then...then there was light and she wasn't flowing. All of the sudden she was on her feet walking to an open door which was held light behind it.

Kim pushed it open and found herself in what looked like the sewers again...wait...

AGAIN?

Kim looked around realizing she had seen this place before. She was here before...

She remembered now when she fell asleep in the tunnel with Donnie from the cold, she had a dream...She dreamed about Donnie and herself, but they were both young and Donnie was with another turtle who kept on telling him they needed to go somewhere.

Was she...was she dreaming again? That meant she was probably still asleep in the tunnel with Donnie, right?

 _Oh my God, please help me wake up. We'll freeze to death!_

'Watch it, Mikey,' snapped someone by the nearest corner and she started to walk there carefully. She found Donnie and two other turtles looking at each other while Donnie was doing something by one of the pipes.

'Maybe it wouldn't so long if the two of you didn't argue and just stay quiet,' said Donnie when all of the sudden a fox ran by pass Donnie who looked up confused. His eyes met with Kim's and she realized he was looking at her.

'Hi,' she said awkwardly and raised her hand. What? She had no idea how to react in her dreams and they were dreams after all so who cared?

Donnie stood up from his spot where he was obviously fixing something.

'Kim,' he said looking confused before he looked somewhere behind her.

She turned around only to find that instead of the sewers she was standing in a dark alley where there was suddenly a fight.

'Come on, bro, let's move it,' said another turtle which ran passed her to Donnie and threw a stick at him which Donnie easily caught. The turtle with katanas then jumped up on the roof of the building and Kim walked toward Donnie.

'So your brothers, ha? How many do you have?' she asked not sure how much accuracy she could give her dreams credit for.

'There's four of us,' he said frowning a bit as he kept looking to where his brother disappeared.

'I'm dreaming,' he mumbled to himself.

Suddenly it felt like the place changed and they were inside what looked like the sewer, but with furniture and a lot of TVs.

Kim blinked as another one of the turtles came talk to Donnie.

'Donnie, there are no cupcakes. How am I going to win the contest with cupcakes?' asked the turtle shaking Donnie's shoulders.

Kim spotted someone sitting at the couch turned with their back toward her. It wasn't a turtle. It was a human. By the length of the hair she assumed it could be a woman.

She was about to ask who it was, when all of the sudden some sharp sound blast through her ears and once again Kim was left all alone flowing in pure nothing, endless darkness.

In the darkness there was no sound, no feelings, no thinking, just nothing...

Despite that God was everyone, she couldn't help, but wondered that maybe in this darkness there was no God either...

* * *

Donnie woke up to the worst sound imaginable, his alarm clock. As he finally turned the damn thing off, he sat up.

Despite being up it still took him a couple of moments to get back into the reality and remember what happened a few days ago.

The terrorist attack, his meeting with Kim Sawyer, their almost freezing to death. It all happened at once, and even though a couple of days had he still wasn't over all the things which happened. He got out of his bed and went to his computer. He was monitor any progress in Kim's state, but so far nothing. She was still in a coma. It was four days now. With every day chances of her waking up were getting smaller and smaller. She had two surgeries done by now. She should have woken up on the first day.

He tried to examine the tube which was left unopened without damaging it, but his tests proved nothing. Whoever, build it was apparently more clever than him.

He gripped his table a bit harder thinking about Kim slowly falling asleep in the cold in his arms while he could literally not do anything than to hold her.

Although he didn't meet many people, he knew Kim was the kindest one of them all.

Shaking his head, he finally decided to go to his workshop and get something done instead of mopping around which wasn't helpful to anyone.

'Huh?' he asked confused as he spotted Mikey by his door looking down at a blonde girl, who had spent the last night in the lair.

'What is she-?'

'Dude, you will never believe what Leo and Jay can do now!' said Mikey sounding excited.

Donnie looked down at Jay who just standing in the middle of their living room until she suddenly said, 'Polo.'

'I don't get it,' mumbled Donnie and Mikey looked at him with a huge grin on his face, 'She's reading Leo's mind!'

* * *

 **A.N: Hello, happy New Year** **to everyone I didn't wish before. I hope it will be fantastic for everyone. Here's a new chapter. I started working again, so not sure about the updates. Hopefully I will have a new chapter next week. Next chapter will be about Jay and Leo, hope you liked Kim and Donnie. Thank you for the support**


	17. The Pretty Girl 05

**The Pretty Girl**

* * *

 _I remember the day I first looked into your eyes and felt my whole world flip_

* * *

Jay looked around the crowded room. She felt so alien there. She wondered how could Nicole do it. Just put on a nice dress do her hair and party like there is not tomorrow. How come Nicole always looked so happy and alive at these things? Like she was having the time of her life? Not to mention she had a life threatened experience just yesterday. Nicole was a force of nature for sure.

Jay never felt like she could be _Nicole_ at parties. She never felt like she belonged there either. She used to hang out with someone people from her class who weren't hitting on her or getting too drunk to have a normal discussion with, but she never happy about being at a party. It might be amusing, but the only time she felt like was at the right place was when Leo crashed through Nicole's roof.

'Hey, you think we could go upstairs? It might be more intimate?' asked the guy, Kyle, asshole friend of David, the asshole who left Nicole in the alley with drug dealers.

'No thanks,' she said and went to disappear into the crowd. She pulled up her phone and texted Leo.

 _J:What are the chances of you coming to save me from this place?_

 _L:I would say about fifteen minutes if I hurry?_

 _J:Then hurry._

She made sure she was on her own and unnoticed and snuck upstairs. It was a good thing everyone was partying hard and the cheerleaders found something to do. Mostly hanging out with guys or drinking games.

She spotted Kim standing with matt talking about something, but after what happened in the kitchen she didn't feel like talking to her. She knew she probably shouldn't have accused Matt of anything. She really didn't know him that well, but she knew _men_. She knew how they acted, she recognized their stares. She could name the handful of men she trusted, but Matt was not on that list. Although he acted all nice and was always around Kim, he just…gave up this vibe. And although yes, Jay knew there were good guys out there, she was never wrong when it came to her intuition that someone was shady.

She went to Nicole's room as fast as possible. It looked pretty much the same as her Upper East Side room. Stylish and obviously something Jay wouldn't be able to afford. She closed the door and walked to the window.

Not being one hundred percent sure about the heels and window frames were a good idea she pulled them off and held them close as she easily climbed outside. It looked easier when she was inside than now when she was on the window frame, but she pulled the shoes closer and started to slowly move to the side of the rose ladder. Good thing for that too.

As she was close to the top she suddenly heard a fainted crack and froze for a moment wondering if she wouldn't end up with a broken neck, but luckily in that moment she felt the familiar sensation and a strong hand on her elbow pulling her up.

'I think I said _fifteen_ minutes,' said Leo a little bit annoyed that she climbed on her own like that putting herself in danger.

'I told you to _hurry_ ,' she said playfully as she was now on the roof with him.

She smirked at him, 'Want to re-live _that_ night?'

'No thanks,' he said and turned to look at the spot he fell through last time. It was fixed now of course, but he still remembered it wondering once again how much of a coincidence it was that he ran into Jay like that.

When he looked back at the mentioned girl, he for the first time took in her dress and how she looked. She was beautiful as always.

'Won't you be cold?' he asked and she shrugged her shoulders, 'I will think about warm things like summer and the new Janelle Monae video clip.'

Leo chuckled at the last one.

'Ah, so you're not totally ignorant to today's social media,' she said and carefully went to sit down.

'I never said I'm ignorant to it. I just don't pay much attention to it,' said Leo and said down next to her as close as possible.

She brushed her hair a bit and looked up at him.

'So Nicole is okay?' he asked and she shrugged her shoulders, 'She's Nicole. She doesn't let things get to her. She's bad ass like that.'

He chuckled, 'You seem to be happy with her. Things working out, okay?'

Jay bit her lip before she pulled it a bit with her teeth, 'Yeah, I don't know. It feels…it's not like before. I still feel like I need to be guarded with her, but…I think we could be friends again…just differently like you said before. So thanks again for the pep talk.'

He nodded before he smiled at her. Somehow he couldn't help himself around her.

'I like your dress and the eyes shadows.'

Jay chuckled looking down at the dress Nicole gave her for a moment, 'It's Nicole's, but thank you. And thanks for not calling me _pretty_.'

'Yeah, I noticed you hate that word a bit,' said Leo and she nodded, 'A lot.'

They chuckled before a tremble ran through her body as she felt the old air run through her.

'Damn it,' she mumbled. Maybe she should have pick up a jacket before she climbed here and definitely put her shoes back on.

'Come here,' he whispered his voice quiet as he lifted his arm and she snuggled against him while he pulled her as close as possible.

Jay shivered again, but not entirely from cold as he pressed his chin against the top of her head. It felt so bizarrely easy to do. She started to feel warm… and something she wasn't sure how to name, but it made her feel better than anything in her life ever did.

'Thanks for coming,' she whispered against his chest.

'I will always come, Jay,' he said knowing it was the truth. 'As long as you want me to.'

Jay felt her heart speed up at his words because what he was saying meant….it meant something no one had ever offered her. No one ever made her feel like she could believe that they were stay. Nicole didn't, or her mother or…anyone. People wanted her for a moment. Men wanted her for a moment, sex, a kiss, a flirt. She could tell that they wouldn't stay with her afterwards. If she gave in to one of them, they would just take what she had and leave. She knew this. She always knew this, but Leo…Leo was so honest and just…different. It was like despite he was the only person she knew who wore a mask compare to everyone else he was the only person didn't have one. He was the only person she felt she could trust completely.

'What if I want you to always come?' she dared herself to ask it out loud.

He brushed her shoulder to warm her a bit up, 'Then I will.'

She smiled because it was just that simple, wasn't it? With the right person, it was really just that simple.

Jay swallowed a bit before she turned to look at him. He looked down at her before she leaned closer and he met her half way.

If Leo was completely honest to himself, kissing her again was what he had been looking forward to all weekend. He had been daydreaming about the blonde who filled almost every space left in his mind if not all of it. He put his hand against her cheek as she hugged him around the neck with one hand keeping the other at his chest. He couldn't explain why kissing her felt so good, but it made him feel like the world stopped and like they were the only two people in the world. It made him feel like the rest of the universe and everything in between faded away except for the warm and intense feeling in his stomach, he got from Jay's lips and tongue sliding against his own.

He let his hand go into her hair and felt her smile against the kiss.

'What?'

She shook her head, 'I'm just happy.'

He stroked her hair again as he was looking into her blue eyes.

'I'm happy too.'

She chuckled, 'That's so sappy.'

'You said it first-'

'Jay?'

Both of them broke free from each other as someone called the blonde's name very close to them.

It was a moment until Leo pointed down and Jay realized it must have been coming from the window she came through.

'Y-yeah?' asked Jay worried that Nicole could possibly hear something.

'Are you okay? What are you doing up there?' asked her friend and Jay licked her lips before she looked up at Leo who stood up now. Apparently their little meeting would have to be cut short again.

 _Damn it, Nicole!_

'Nothing, just looking at the sky,' lied Jay annoyed a little bit. Leo took her hand as she went to look down she could see Nicole holding the window frame, which reminded Jay the latina wasn't a fan of heights.

Jay closed her eyes already knowing what she would have to do before she turned around and looked at Leo, 'Want me to go down?' asked the blonde Nicole while looking at him with an apologizing look.

He shook his head, his face calmly telling her it was okay.

'Yeah,' admitted the girl loudly from below and Leo stepped closer to Jay leaning down to kiss her softly one more time before he held her up by the waist and slowly lowered her to the window frame.

She looked up at him one last time before she went into the room. She really wanted to spend more time with him.

Despite Nicole cutting her…well _date_ short, Jay couldn't help but smile. Being with Leo cause her to feel ridiculously happy sometimes.

'You okay? Want some water?' she asked Nicole as she saw the raven haired girl on her bed looking a bit down.

'What were you doing?' asked Nicole looking a bit worried.

'Just watching the sky,' lied Jay again…well, sort of she saw the sky a few times if she wasn't kissing Leo or enjoying his warm next to her body.

Nicole nodded, 'I thought you went with Kyle?'

'That dick? No thanks,' replied Jay and hopped on the bed next to her. It was a ridiculous idea that Jay would went anywhere with that asshole. She already hated him and guys like him. The last thing she would do was to purposely spent more time with him.

'Good thing you got better taste than that,' said Nicole and pulled out her cigarette.

'Wouldn't your dad get pissed?' asked Jay hating a bit that Nicole smoke. The smell was not pretty. Jay was never a fan of alcohol or cigarettes. She only ever took a sip of beet once in her life, but when a guy started try and get her alone to a room at a party she freaked out and vowed to never drink on a party ever again. She knew _all_ men weren't like that, but so far…she hadn't met anyone she trusted enough. Not until Leo.

'No, Yolana might, but dad smokes too so,' replied Nicole. She lightened her smoke, 'So what you got your eyes set on someone else? I could tell you weren't feeling any guy around for a while.'

'Ah, so you do care and you're a romantic too, ha?' joked Jay, but smiled as she thought about Leo who probably left now.

Nicole rolled her eyes, 'Come on, don't be a…'

'Yes,' said Jay calmly before she looked at her, 'Yeah, I _like_ someone.'

'Like ha?' asked Nicole a bit surprised, but kind of looking pleased.

'I _really_ like…he's not like anyone I ever met before. I can't explain it, but I think he is the first person who looks at me and sees me as more than my looks or body. He sees me as me. Not many people do,' admitted Jay. It was a bit irrational. She didn't know Leo that well. They only met a handful of times, but when they talked it was like she was speaking with someone without a single hidden motive. Hell, until Friday, she had to be the one to kiss him. He was such a gentlemen, she didn't even know what to do with him…

'Whoa, Jay likes a boy. It's a whole new world,' joked Nicole.

'You bet,' said the blonde. They lied on her bed for a while. Jay thought it was nice. There was music below them from the party, but it was like Nicole and her were in a different universe or in their own little world.

Growing up neither Jay or Nicole had many friends. Jay knew she could come off as a bit reserved while Nicole had a mouth on her. Maybe it was because the two were just so consumed with one another, but they never got to have anyone to infiltrate their pair at least not for a long shot. Nicole now had Jill and David though. Maybe it was just Jay. She just found that _one_ person who she dedicated all her world to and didn't look for anyone else. Nicole, Leo, her mom...

'I missed you.'

'I missed you too.'

They started to talk for a bit in hushed voices. It was funny to Jay that they were lying on Nicole's bed in the middle of her party talking about stuff like the upcoming Christmas or why do people buy so many medicine these days while there was a party all around them and the music was almost impossible to ignore.

'This is nice,' said Nicole after a whole and took Jay's hand.

The blonde smiled, 'Yeah, my best party so far.'

'Well, then you should come to more and hang out with me,' teased Nicole.

'Maybe I will if you do the same,' replied Jay when suddenly they heard someone enter the room.

'Uh, Nicole?' The both of them sat up and looked at Kim Sawyer who was smiling at them with her angelic face. Some girls just always remained with that sweet babydoll face through the whole life.

'I have to go home, but the party was great. Good work.'

Nicole blinked and smirked at her for a moment while Jay watched her closely, 'No problem. Thanks for coming, did something happened?'

Kim blinked at her confused.

'You're leaving,' explained Jay and Kim giggled a bit shaking her head, 'No, I just have a curfew. Enjoy your night.'

'Kim!' called Jay just as Kim was about to close the door, 'About what I said. Forget it, I just…sometimes I say the wrong things.'

Kim smiled at her, 'It's nothing. Good night.'

'Night, Kim.'

'Good night.'

Nicole turned to Jay as Kim closed the door on them, 'What did you tell her?'

'That Matt could be a cheater? I didn't mean to…it just fell out. It's not like I saw him cheating. We were just talking about guys in general and it fell out,' admitted Jay feeling disappointed with herself for being mean to Kim. Kim of all people!

'Well, everyone cheats if they have the opportunity and want to,' said Nicole shrugging her shoulders and standing up to go check on herself in the mirror. Nicole always made sure she looked good. Even if she was high as hell or drunk she looked fantastic. Her makeup almost bulletproofed.

Jay shook her head sternly, 'I don't think _everyone_ cheats, but I think high school guys just… popular kids have this habit of trying to feel too good sometimes.'

Nicole brushed her lips and then pulled out a lip-gloss, 'Exactly, but is it really good to deny the things you want?'

Jay blinked. It was a bit of a sad thought. If people were in a relationship and felt like cheating, but didn't. Were they bad people who were just denying themselves what they wanted, or good people who did the right thing?

'I never felt the need to cheat.'

'That's because you're Jay McClaud and until now you never had a boyfriend, did you now?'

Jay blinked. Right Leo was her boyfriend now. It made her smile.

'Still, I doubt I would cheat ever,' said Jay and got up as well getting behind Nicole, 'You look great. Now let's go.'

Nicole rolled her eyes but smiled at the praise and walked out with her.

* * *

Jay was always a creature of solitude. She liked being in minimum crowds with minimum number of people. She liked when everyone thought she was an ice queen and stayed away because now it looked like everyone was in her face or trying to get there.

She was (God forgive me for this sin) a _cheerleader_ now. Something she swore from the beginning of high school she would never be. Yet, here she was stuffing her tiny uniform into her gym bag for later. She still refused to wear it around school unless she was in the gym, she often didn't wear it even then, but most girls didn't so it was okay.

The blonde noticed that people started to slowly invade her space. First it seemed casual like some of the girls would stop by her locker or on the way to the class and chat about this and that. Nothing too deep or interesting just chit chat. People started to talk to her more in class and even sit next to her in the cafeteria.

Damn.

 _J:I don't like being around people._

 _L:You joined the squad._

 _J: Minor brain death apparently._

 _L: It will be okay. If it comes to worse go sit outside like last time and call me. No one will want to disturb someone who is on the phone. That would be rude._

 _J: Teens are rude._

'Hello, earth to Jay,' said Nicole as she stole some of the blonde's fries by now. Jay rolled her eyes at her and put the phone away for a bit.

Now she was sitting with Nicole, Jill, Kim, Matt, and some other kids. She was starting not to like this setup already.

She looked around to where Molly Jones used to sit with her. Lately the girl was skipping lunches.

'Hey, what's on your mind?' asked Nicole lifting her brows, 'The cute guy?'

One of the guys, Chris turned around to look at them curious.

'Talking about me?' he asked and smirked.

Jay gave him an impressed look before she looked at Nicole, 'Yup.'

Nicole grinned at her teasingly before she started to make promiscuous things with her tongue to which Jay hit her over the head and went to leave. She had enough of the popular crowd for a while.

She met Molly in the hallway furiously texting on her phone.

Jay smirked, 'Talking to _Mi_ again?'

Molly looked up at her before she nodded and returned to her phone her fingers quickly typing something.

'If you want we can start coming sooner to lunch,' said Jay sitting down next to her pulling out her own phone.

Molly raised her brows.

'So you don't have to sit with the _popular crowd?_ ' suggested Jay and Molly flinched for a moment before she smirked at her.

She signed her something like _You_ and _Jay_ something before she wrote something and showed her her phone.

 _So_ you _don't have to sit with them, Jay._

Jay shrugged her shoulders, 'True that, but I guess I kind of want to sit with Nicole and Kim's not so bad.'

Molly looked at her for a moment before she texted Jay.

 _Yeah, Kim's an angel._

Jay blinked and looked over at the girl. She noticed it before. Molly was opinional and a no bullshitter. Maybe that was why Jay liked her so much and wanted to hang out with her. She understood why she didn't like the cheerleaders. Jay didn't like most of them either. She understood why she didn't like the boys from the team. Jay _hated_ those chauvinistic assholes. She even understood why she didn't like Nicole or Jill. Jury was still out for Jill and Nicole. They did some pretty bad stuff to Molly and the others. Jay she only cut out of her life, but some kids she really bullied. But Kim? Jay knew men. She could tell when they were assholes who would try something on her. Some just lightly some not so much Women were a bit hard to read at times. Apart from Carmen and Jill who she knew were bitches with the capital B, she couldn't always tell if women were being honest or not. Men were easy. Women not so much.

Which was why she was so confused why was Molly so upset about Kim. She thought she was a nice girl. In fact Jay was almost convinced Kim Sawyer was the nicest girl she ever met. So why didn't Molly like her?

'You don't like Kim very much do you?' she asked and saw how Molly visibly froze.

After a moment she just gave Jay a tight smile and shrugged her shoulder. She guessed she wasn't ready to talk about it, but it was obvious, but it only made Jay knew she was right. Molly had a big problem with Kim. The question was what kind?

* * *

Jay smiled at her phone as beeped. She knew it was a text from Leo. He probably just woke up and they were planning for him to come and have a movie night in her room since he had his _day off_ as he called it. He explained that his brothers and him always agreed to have a day every couple of weeks to rest. Usually he spent the day meditating or more training (such a overachiever) or just relaxing, but now with Jay in his life, he started to spent the whole day with her if he could. Usually the day went to be a school day so they could only spent time together during the evening and night. It was almost bizarre for Jay how easily she fell into the whole dating thing. She spent most of her days in classes, then with Nicole or Molly and then with her squad while texting Leo all through the day and then if he had time during the patrol they met or spent the night together if he had a day off.

Since she was never a fan of teen movie clichés, Jay doubted dating was anything like they showed in the movies or TV shows. She just expected it to be this complicated process which many times ended in failure. At least that was what she picked from her Mom's love life. Yet, when it came to dating Leo nothing seemed easier. They hang out and talked and were just together. It was no rocket science. It was during one of the times when Leo actually _fell asleep_ inside her bed and _she_ was the one watching him that she realized it's only complicated if you make it that way. Leo was a mutant turtle vigilante who lived in the sewer during the day while Jay was an ordinary teenage girl. It should be incredibly messy and complicated, and still it wasn't. It was perfect and just happened so naturally.

As she watched him lightly breathing next to her while the movie ended, she just couldn't imagine what was so hard in relationships. When she looked up at her mom who was eating next to her and thought of all her failed relationships, she wondered if it actually couldn't always be that easy and if people weren't the ones creating these insane obstacles so they wouldn't be together.

'Who's that?' asked her mom as Jay was sitting next to her behind their small kitchen counter. Their kitchen was too small for a kitchen table so they only had a counter with three chairs by it.

Jay was mostly on her phone while her mom was reading through some magazine. It was breakfast time and today Leo was coming over for the whole night since Jay had no school tomorrow. All morning Leo and Jay were talking about what Leo was planning for his brother for Christmas. Apparently since there were so many of them, their father decided long ago that they would do a secret Santa to a bit economic about their gifts. The whole conversation made Jay realize that she should probably get Leo something as well even thought they didn't really talk about these things. It was obvious he was going to give her something. She just had a feeling he was the type who would.

Jay looked up to see her mom peeking over her shoulders, 'Just this guy.'

'Boyfriend kind of guy?' pried her mom. Jay smirked and shrugged her shoulders. She was in too much of a good mood to play the cool game with her mom even if she couldn't admit she how important Leo was since she couldn't explain why he couldn't come to meet her mom.

'I don't know yet,' admitted Jay and her mom watched her for a moment she put the magazine away.

Jay felt her fingers tense a bit on the phone since he mom was giving her a look which meant she would want to talk.

 _Please, don't start anything..._

'Well, I hope he's the only one.'

 _Of course, you had to start something..._

Jay put the phone away, 'What?'

'Sometimes girls have a lot of _guys_ like that. Not very _good_ girls,' she said and brushed Jay's hair a bit. The touch might have been soft but it was anything but mothering in Jay's mind. She felt the hair on the back of her neck stood up.

The teen watched her speechless before she took her phone and got up.

Her mom let out a sigh, 'Jay, I'm just saying-'

'That I have to have ten guys and go with all of them at the same time because I'm pretty and guys pay attention to me?' asked Jay turning to look at her, 'Well, not go out. Just _screw_.'

'JAY!' snapped her mom at her.

'Don't sugar code it,' Jay shook her head, 'It's obvious what you think of me.'

'I just don't want you to get in trouble you can't get out off,' said her mother actually looking sorry.

Jay shook her head again, 'Right because _I'm_ the troublemaker who got all these men and boys to go after me, right? I'm the pretty girl. It's what I do, isn't it?'

'Jay, you're making things up,' said her mom and Jay gave her one final look. The blonde felt like there was this huge rock inside her throat which made her want to cry, but like always she pushed it away.

'Yeah, because that's what pretty girls do. We ask for it and then we make things up,' said Jay looking at her mom the way she never thought she would, with pure hate.

She didn't wait for an apology and instead when to her room and locked herself up. When she sat down on the bed. She half expected herself to cry, but come to think of it, Jay couldn't remember the last time she did cry. At least not really.

She put her earphones on and tried to focus on something else, but it all was just coming back to her. As she lied on her back looking at her ceiling she thought about all those things which happened to her. She thought about her psychologist and the man who tried to kidnap her from school. She thought about all those whistles and glances and shouts and approaches. She thought about how hard Joey Mendez grabbed her first when she was thirteen after she told him she didn't want to kiss him.

She didn't tell Leo about these things. She used to tell her psychologist. Some things she told Nicole and her mother, but in the end it never had a good resolve. In fact, it ended in a catastrophe.

Leo was finally something good in her life after all those years of...loneliness and sadness. She didn't want to lose him, but at the same time, how could they be together if she didn't let him in? If she wouldn't show him this part of her life?

She knew he was the good guy...was he too good for her?

Now she was sure, it was people who complicated their relationships because she felt the need to do the same to her.

* * *

Leo felt himself as he was nervously looking at his little brother who was grinning at his phone before he burst into laughter again startling Raph as he watching TV with Leo. Well he was watching since Leo was spying on Mikey. Despite telling Donnie that they weren't doing anything about his discovering, that he was talking to the creator of NY vigilantes who knew who he was. Although he wanted to give Mikey his space and privacy, it was getting on his nerves that his brother was talking to someone who could expose them like this.

'Damn it, Mike, put that away!' snapped Raph and grabbed his phone before Mikey could stop him causing the other turtle to gasp.

'Dude, give that back!' he got to his feet and Raph smirked at him. Leo could sense trouble.

'Raph, give him back his phone,' he said calmly.

'Oh, poor baby Mikey, can't even do anything without his big brothe-'

'Shut up!' shouted Mikey before he jumped at Raph. Ha. Usually it was Raph who lost himself gave into his emotions caused by Mikey who provoked him. Leo didn't have much time to think about how much of an irony it was right now that Mikey was the one who got upset as he had to get engage and break them up.

Mikey then grabbed his phone and showed his tongue to Raph.

'Yeah, can't do anything without his big brother!'

Mikey frowned for a moment before he grinned at him, 'Yeah, look who's talking _Leo, Donnie, there's something in my room._ Scary turtle. It was a spider.'

Raph charged himself at him, but Leo pushed him off, 'That's enough. Let's just watch the movie.'

'Why bother? You're only waiting to go to your chick's house,' snapped Raph.

Leo frowned feeling himself boiling like always when Raph brought up Jay knowing he was mocking him and her or insulting.

'What are you talking about?'

'I heard you telling this knucklehead that you're going to see her later, so why don't you just go!'

'Don't talk about her,' said Leo calmly although he knew that Raph mentioning Jay would sooner or later bring only one thing, a fight.

Raph smirked obviously enjoying how he was pushing his brother's buttons, 'Oh, yeah, because we can't meet her or talk about her, can we now? What afraid she will meet the rest of the bunch and figure out you're not so great?'

Leo looked away for a moment clearly trying to calm down, Mikey put his phone away now looking from one to another.

'What is it big brother? Not so fearless when it comes to pretty girls? I mean if she likes you she has to have some weird kinds, doesn't she?' said Raph. Leo didn't hold it in after that and simply punched Raph without a second word.

Raph took a step back before he launched himself at Leo.

'Here we go again! DONNIE! SENSEI!' Leo heard Mikey shout as he got kicked by Raph into the stomach.

'My sons! Not in front of the TV you remember what happen-'

Of course it ended with Leo throwing Raph to the TV. All five members of the household froze as they watched the TV in intense silence for a couple of moment waiting to see it if it would fall down or not.

All of them let out a relieved sigh before it Master Splinter let out a frustrated sighed, 'My sons, perhaps it's time for you to find something to do on your own and far away from the TV!'

Leo looked away ashamed and embarrassed and he could tell Raph felt the same.

'Sorry Master Splinter,' they said at the same time before they frowned at each other. Lately it was becoming harder and harder to hang around him.

* * *

Jay was texting with Molly when she sensed the familiar sensation and smiled. She already had a sweater prepared since it was cold as hell outside and put it over her pajamas before she opened the window.

Leo was looking down at the empty alley below them. It was night so no one was around. There wasn't even any light turned on in the opposite's windows.

He smiled when he heard her movement on her wooden floor.

When she opened the window, he smiled, 'How do you always know I'm here?'

She came out and closed the window. It was very chilly, 'Special skill.'

He chucked as she walked up to him. He watched her for a moment before he let his fingers brush into her golden hair before he leaned down and kissed.

She had to tiptoe to reach him, but she didn't look too bothered. She kissed him back like she always did like a fresh of new air, like something out of this world. He doubted he would ever got used to this feeling.

His other hand went to her waist to support her weight while she put her arms around her neck standing up like a ballerina. When he broke the kiss she slowly got back to her heels smiling at him softly her face a bit red but not necessary from the cold.

He brushed her face, 'Hi.'

She grinned at him making his heart skip a beat all over again, 'Hi.'

He followed her inside in a couple of moments since it was really cold for her to be just standing there in the cold December weather.

They sat down on her bed in the dark. She didn't light up since he mom was home. Despite not having any light he could easily make out her hair, face her posture as she was kneeling on her bed now opposite to him. She convinced him last time he came that he could sit on it and it wouldn't break. He was still a bit sceptical.

She brushed her hair.

'Something on your mind?' she asked.

'Why do you ask?'

'Just a feeling,' she confessed. It was in the way he was looking at the alley when she came out it felt like something was off. She just sort of picked up on it.

He shrugged his shoulders. In the dark he looked so different. Jay couldn't really explain it. There was something very alluring about his silhouette in the darkness of her room.

'Something with your brother again?' she asked.

He nodded looking deep in thoughts for a moment before he admitted, 'Sort of.'

He decided to just tell her, 'My brother he has been writing with the creator of the Vigilantes of NY website.'

Jay opened her mouth surprised, 'Okay, by the look on your face I'm assuming, it's bad.'

'He doesn't know he's writing with her.'

'Her? Oh cool,' said Jay and shrugged, 'Female power and all.'

Leo grimaced, 'Anyway, he has been writing with her and he doesn't know she's the author of the site.'

'I'm a bit confused now.'

'My other brother hacked their messages.'

' _Okay_ , so basically your brother is texting with someone who could use the things he say in the website?' asked Jay sitting up a bit, 'That's not okay. It's dangerous for you guys.'

Leo smiled a bit touched that she cared, 'It's fine. He wouldn't say anything, but as if yesterday it's clear the girl knows who she's texting with.'

'Well, then this is very bad. Why? Why didn't you tell your brother about her?'

'Because he likes her, and we're worried we would spoil it for him if we said anything. Also by the looks of it, the girl is trying to keep our identity as safe as possible. Not even telling Mikey she knows who he is even if she had the chance.'

Jay sighed and titled her head, 'Well, I guess, I get why you wouldn't want to spoilt Mikey's crush for him, and if you trust his and the girl's judgement enough not to think something would be leaked than it's really the right thing to do.'

Jay stroke his cheek, 'I like the whole _big brother_ thing by the way.'

He chuckled, 'Good, because I tend to do that _a lot_.'

The blonde grinned all her bad feelings from before disappearing before she said.

'So your brother, Donnie, often hacks people you are friends with? Also did he do something to my phone because I swear it freezes more often than before so if he did I demand he fix it.'

Leo smiled wider, 'I will pass it on. So you're not upset that he hacked you in the first place?'

She shifted her legs a bit and her knee touched his lightly, 'I'm not sure honestly. I guess I get why he did it, and it's not like I have porn there or something.'

He chuckled, 'You would be surprised what my brother can dig up.'

Jay rolled her eyes but didn't move keeping her legs the way they were before.

Leo stopped smiling for a moment. It was so strange to be with Jay in the dark whispering. They could talk louder than that, but somehow it didn't seem right in the quiet of her room.

'You're worried about what will Mikey do if he finds out?' she asked as she put her hands on his knees. No pressure just lightly putting them there before she used them to stood up on her knees.

'I'm afraid he will figure it somehow out on his own and then shut himself out. He might be the careless one from all of us, but he would never allow us to get in danger and for our secret to be revealed.'

Jay nodded and leaned closer to him, 'What do you want to do?'

 _Right now?_ Definitely nothing which has anything to do with Mikey or Donnie or Molly Jones.

He put his hands on her cheeks and kissed her deeply for a moment before he leaned away, 'We have time today. We can watch a movie like you wanted.'

Jay watched him for a moment. There might have been other things she wanted to do, but then again she remembered what Leo said. Donnie could dig up anything.

Jay pulled her phone and waved it in front of him turning it on to light the room a bit.

'I rather you gave it to me when I came and then I will return it after my patrol,' he said and she blinked.

'What? Will you miss me if we don't text during the day?'

He smirked, 'You have no idea.'

It was true. At this point he couldn't imagine a day without texting Jay, but there was also the fact that he felt very uncomfortable about Jay not having her phone on her. He remembered the time the guy was harassing her on the street. She managed to get rid of him which he was proud of but it made him realize that Jay must have faced such behavior often. An image with Jay not being able to use a phone to call for help or him was just too scary.

When he suddenly felt her fingers gently stroke his forehead he blinked surprised he got so lost in his thoughts.

'What's with that?' she asked as she was smoothing his frown with her touch.

He shook his head, 'Just thinking.'

'Raph or Mikey now?'

'You,' he admitted and brushed her hair a bit.

She chuckled before she went to put the movie on.

* * *

'So what do you want to do next time?' he asked her as she was lying in his arms in the dark of her room. The movie on her laptop had long ended, but neither of them moved to turn it off.

Her fingers danced a bit over his chest a little bit. It was very nice and a bit distracting if he was completely honest. Having someone warm and human press against you like this when it wasn't in the heat of battle was well different than anything he ever knew, 'Actually, I was wondering if I can go out with you next time.'

He was caught off guard by the sudden suggestion. If he didn't counted their first meeting and Nicole's last party, the only time they were outside together was when he was getting her to Nicole's house at night. He was a bit confused why she would want something like that honestly.

'You do realize that I'm not exactly someone who can be seen outside, right?'

He didn't see her face, but he had a feeling she rolled her eyes.

'Really? I never noticed,' she said sarcastically.

He let his fingers brush against her side which caused her to let out a startled gigglish yelp.

'Jerk!'

He smirked a bit, 'Why the sudden interest?'

She shrugged her shoulders, 'Because…I guess I want to see something a bit more from your life.'

Liar.

Well, okay, it was unfair to assume she was lying, but with how her heart rate jumped all of the sudden and he could sense how her smell changed because she got nervous, he sort of had a feeling she was lying. If it was anyone else, he would call them out, but he sort of didn't want to call out Jay on it.

He brushed her hair again wondering if it was even fair to know that she was lying to him. He definitely had an advantage she didn't, but she was lying about something which even if he was no expert in relationship. He was pretty sure you don't lie to your boyfriend.

'Is that why you really want to go?' he asked hoping she would use her chance to tell him what was really wrong.

She hummed and sat up looking down at him, 'It is but…it's also something else.'

'Okay,' he started slowly waiting for her to continue, but she just sat there on her knees looking at him in the dark, 'You don't want to talk about it, do you?'

'Not yet?'

She looked away to the window for a moment, 'I guess…I guess I want to see a part of something of yours to let you see a part of something of mine. Does that make sense?'

He blinked. It sort of did. In Leo's mind, their relationship was all about letting each other in. Into their hearts, minds and souls, and well…(he tried not to blush) bodies. They were different kind of people with some dark corners and thoughts. He had plenty of things he couldn't voice yet so did she, but the both of them wanted to talk about them to each other. Even bad things are a part of who you are and for someone to truly know you, truly accept and love you, he has to know those things as well.

He sat up and stroked her cheek, 'You're going to have to wear clothes you don't usually wear. Nothing with too much color or slogans or whatever, okay? And you need to keep your hair covered it's…it's quite a spotting sign. Also under no circum-'

She smirked and before he knew it she had her arms around his neck and was kissing him shutting him up.

He broke the kiss and gave her a look, 'You do realize this is serious talk right now? I don't want no distractions.'

She chuckled before smirking, 'I have like ten comebacks for that one, but okay for like five minutes I will behave.'

'Whoa, five minutes, you're better than Mikey.'

'Four minutes and forty-eight seconds,' said Jay calmly.

He rolled his eyes before he sighed, 'I'm being serious. If we're doing this, you have to be careful and protected. No one can see who you really are. I don't want anyone to hurt you trying to get to me and my family.'

Jay nodded now serious and on point as well, 'They won't. I won't let give anyone to chance to know who I am. I'll figure it out. I promise.'

He watched her for a moment before he nodded, 'Good. Be smart.'

She smirked and in a mocking voice said, 'Good thing you didn't say _be good_.'

* * *

To say that Leo was a bit more nervous was an understatement of the year. He was very nervous. It was like a week had past in a blink of an eye and the day he promised to take Jay out was finally here and he felt like a balloon ready to burst. It shouldn't be so hard and scary, but it was…it was very hard and scary. He knew all the outcomes of this and he knew that if anything happened to Jay, he would literally die. No not being able to forgive himself, or blaming himself he would just…die.

He didn't fully understood why she wanted to go out with him. He knew there was something bothering her even if she tried to keep it a secret, but he promised he would take her out so he would.

'My son, are you well?' asked Master Splinter as he was drinking tea in the kitchen as Leo was pacing a bit around the loft.

'Yes, Master. I'm just thinking,' he explained hoping it didn't show how worried he was.

His Master didn't buy it of course, 'I see anything particular. Perhaps Ms. Jay?'

Leo didn't nod but still walked and sat down opposite from him behind the table, 'We're going out today but she won't be seen so you don't have to worry about it.'

He said it so quickly his father blinked, 'Oh, I see, well, I wasn't worried but it's good to know.'

He took a sip of his tea. Master Splinter always looked so calmed and like he had it all figured out. He wondered if such natural peace came with age, 'If she will not be seen is there something else which bothers you?'

'I don't know,' said Leo before he found himself saying, 'I'm worried, we might ran into some trouble.'

'Ah, but surely you wouldn't risk Ms. Jay's life. I believe she would be your first priority and you would bring her to safety before you would engage in anything too dangerous,' said his father and Leo's face immediately went red, 'Of course, I would. I-I would never let Jay get in any danger because of me.'

His father smiled, 'Then what is the problem, my son?'

Leo calmed down a bit, 'I'm worried…she might see that _I'm_ a bit dangerous too. She never saw me fight before not in real life and I'm worried. I'm worried it might scare her.'

His father watched him for a moment before he looked amused and put his hand over his lips trying to fight back a large grin, 'My son, I believe Ms. Jay has had plenty of time to see just what you are capable of and if she's brave enough to stand it or not. You shouldn't underestimate her in such way. She is a woman after all. Your brothers and you had very little experience with a female role model in your life growing up, but I assure you women are not the weakest gender. In fact many of them are stronger than many men.'

He took his mug again, 'Perhaps just go out and see what the night will bring. Stressing about things which might happen is pointless as life tends to make the most unexpected changes to our plans one way or another.'

* * *

Jay forced all her hair into a messy hair bun before she pulled the hoodie over it and zipped it. She knew she would be cold so she made sure she put a warm old jacket on. She looked…different. She never looked less like herself than now in her opinion.

As she watched herself in her mirror she wondered if people would even care enough to bother her when she was like this. Maybe it really was something she was doing without knowing. Maybe she was purposely somehow causing all the drama with her hair and the way she was dressing.

When she felt the familiar feeling in the back of her mind, it actually surprised her a bit.

She got out.

'You ready?' he asked looking her up and down nodding in approval of her clothes.

She took the scarf from her pocket and put it around her head covering her mouth before she stepped out of her window.

* * *

If he would be comparing this night to his usual nights out, this one went mostly by uneventful until he caught a wind of some trouble below.

'I'm sorry if this ruined our night,' he said suddenly looking a bit down as he put the girl down on top of the roof after he had to leave the scene.

Jay blinked confused, 'What did?'

'The mugging-'

'Was amazing,' she cut in before she realized what she said, 'I mean obviously it was not amazing that someone was getting mugged, but the way to beat those guys and saved that guy and his daughter was amazing. It was…,' Jay shook her head and chuckled, 'I can't even explain it.'

She took a step back to go sit on the empty wooden box behind her, 'I saw _a_ lot of videos off you guys and read the articles, but to actually see it…I can't explain it.'

'You sound like a fan girl now,' he smiled and she groaned, 'Yeah, well, right now I feel like one which is so much worse than a _cheerleader_.'

'Alright, you have to stop pretending you don't like cheerleading. If you didn't like it you wouldn't be on the squad,' he said and went to go sit down next to her.

He couldn't see her face behind the scarf, but she was smiling.

'Will you tell me now, why did you want to go out with me?' he asked.

Jay was quiet for a moment. The realization that she must come clean about her feelings in order for them to be happy finally sank in.

'I wanted…I want to share something with you. Something dark about me,' started Jay before she swallowed, 'and I thought _stupidly_ that if I see you fight…doing something violent and dark I will not feel so…much like out of the two of us _I_ 'm the bad guy, but…,' she shook her head and looked at him.

'I was wrong. There's nothing bad about you. Even the fighting. It's not violence. It's not. It's just…good. It's filled with kindness, peace and love for this city and its people and the need to protect them,' she said and tried to brush an invisible hair which wasn't there because it was under the hoodie.

'You think what you're going to share with me will be bad? Will it put you in a bad light? I find that hard to believe,' he said, but she frowned down at her hands, 'You don't know me. You know me when I'm with you, but when I'm with others….when people are around me…you don't know me like that. You don't know the things which happen.'

He was growing worried about her. She sounded so…sad and depressed all of the sudden. He reached out and took her hand into his.

'I don't think there is anything dark or bad about you Jay. In fact I think you're the opposite of that,' he said softly and she looked at him just as his phone started to vibrate.

He cursed under his breath as he looked at her, 'I should pick that up.'

'It's okay,' she said and pulled her legs to her chest. She didn't look upset, but he felt she was. He felt how tense she was like she was holding it all inside whatever it was.

Jay crossed her arms as she listened to Leo speak with his brother, 'So you're leaving.'

'I wanted to walk you home,' he said and frowned, but she just smiled, 'It's okay. I will just the take the sub. It will only be a couple of moments of walking home then.'

'I still don't like it,' he said looking very upset about it.

Jay raised her brows, 'Leo. I have been fine and able to take care of myself long before I met you. I'll be good.'

He sighed, 'Okay, please call me when you get home.'

She pulled out a gorgeous smile, 'Promise.'

Her scarf was down for a moment as she came to him and kissed him deeply. He sighed into the kiss and kissed her back before she stepped back and put the mask back up, 'Be safe.'

He watched her go to the direction of the subway for a moment before he turned around and went to his brothers. He really didn't feel sure about letting her leave like this.

Everything happened so fast from the point Jay and Leo split to the point she was in the subway with the turtles fighting with some terrorist.

Jay fell to the ground on her stomach feeling Mikey's body over hers before the whole subway collapsed on top of them and the world changed.

* * *

 _The next moment she opened her eyes she was in the middle of a battle field some soldier got her to the ground and pulled his sword at her. With all her might she kicked his leg and grabbed her small knife stabbing him into the hip._

 _The soldier screamed and she grabbed the bow and arrow from the ground hitting him into the heart from arm distance._

 _She spit out some blood from his previous punch. All around her were soldiers fighting. She pulled her helmet which got crocked and started to shot arrows at the soldiers in black military clothes and armour. She got another one before she noticed one of her own got his sword stuck inside one of the armours of their opponents. It took her a moment but she recognized him. The eldest son of the Yamato clan._

* * *

 _He pressed his foot against the dead soldier body trying to pull his sword out of his armour as it got stuck inside the metal. His arm got injured badly when he got pulled down from his horse and he felt sharp pain shooting from him every time he pulled at his sword._

 _It was maybe that he felt someone's gaze on him that he looked up and spotted a soldier in green armour looking at him. One of his with a bow and arrow pointing right at him._

 _He couldn't explain why but he froze for a moment. He had been trained for this all his life and fought in battles for a while now. He never froze before. He never did such a foolish thing before._

 _The arrow flew through the air but instead of hitting him it hit someone behind him. He turned around only to spot a soldier in the back armour going to the ground. It was enough for him that he got so close to him that he put all his might into it and pulled the sword from the armour just as another was next to him. He looked up at the soldier who saved him, but the moment he was lost in the crowd of fighting black and green armours._

* * *

 _He didn't see the soldier until several days later when they were eating in a moment of peace. Most of the soldiers in groups chatting and eating, but this soldier ate alone. He usually saw him eating with his brother. This time he was alone. He spotted some soldiers pointing at him and frowning talking. He wasn't sure why he suddenly decided to sit down next to him, the only daughter of Aya clan._

 _She looked up at him suspicious why he was sitting with her._

' _Thank you for before,' he said it would be more polite if he bowed to her, but war was making them all a bit savage._

 _She didn't ease her suspicious, but she nodded at him, 'You're welcome.'_

* * *

 _He ended up returning her the favour as she received a strong kick into the side sending her to the ground._

' _DIE!' shouted the soldier as he went to stab her. She could only raise her arm in some sort of protection, but before the blow finally came the soldier got stabbed by someone behind him and she let out a relieved sighed as she spotted him._

 _He came to her and offered her his hand. She had half the mind to decline it, but given the pain in her side when she tried to move on her own, she accepted it. When he got her up he looked around, 'How about you get their archers and I will guard you from the close impact.'_

 _She nodded already pulling the bow and arrow lucking the pain wasn't so terrible she couldn't shot, 'That sounds like a plan.'_

* * *

 _He looked at his brother and the princess he was escorting a little bit ahead of them. His brother was always the silent type when it came to this woman, not that he was any different, but he had a feeling he actually cared for her._

' _She likes him too,' said his female fellow soldier. She became his most trusted companion and he hers, she always knew exactly what he was thinking and he knew what she was. It was almost as if their minds were connected._

' _She's a princess. There is no future for them if he tries...it could lead to more war,' he said already thinking about all the trouble this could cause._

 _She shook head, 'Well, if it does at least we won't get bored at home. Who would want to sit home all day anyway?'_

 _He looked over at her again and smirked knowing she was referring to the fact that both of them could never stay at home just living their lives. They were soldiers, warriors in their hearts and their blood screamed for battle._

' _Perhaps,' he said and smiled a little bit. He never met anyone who would understand him the way she did. He trained with many soldiers, including his brothers, but with her...he almost felt as if they were connected. They might have had two bodies, but when they needed it was as if they shared one mind...maybe even one heart._

 _He stole a small glance at her again._

 _Maybe he wouldn't even mind to sit at home all day if she was there..._

* * *

 _She looked around the place. She was bathing herself in the lake behind the small waterfall they went to hide. She was only in her hadajuban which was the most she got exposed since they ran from their prison a couple of days ago. They finally stopped and hid the horses and their weapons inside the waterfall._

 _He went to check the perimeter to make sure they were alone offering her some time to bath in private. There weren't many times for such treatment and when she entered the military training, she made herself clear she didn't need it, but now she was very grateful for it. She untangled her hair a little bit to wash it. She had been keeping it tied up for so long it was so painful to pull apart not to mention it got so long._

 _She let it fall down her shoulders as she finally for what felt like a year felt clean. It was very hard to bath with so many soldiers around her even if her brother was keeping an eye and her and now her new friend was._

 _She looked to where he was probably standing by the tree with his back toward her so he wouldn't offend her in some way. They had been riding together for months now. Despite knowing that they had a more important task on their hands, she couldn't help, but felt...something. She couldn't name it. It was so strong it almost made her scared yet thrilled as if she was getting ready for her next battle._

 _She couldn't explain it, but sometimes when he looked at her and she looked at him in the night where the only light came from the camp fire or when the battle was over and the two of them were still alive it was...she felt like she was going to burst or like her heart was going to break free from her body._

 _She watched him before she put her hand on her chest feeling how quick it was beating._

 _She looked back at him for a moment before she made her decision. She went back under the waterfall into the small cave they hid everything._

 _The horses paid little to no attention to her. She waited for a couple of minutes before she got out again and whistled at her companion by the tree. It was one of their many secret signals and rituals. She supposed you had to have those when you're an unwed female soldier._

 _When he came through the waterfall he stopped abruptly realizing she wasn't dressed. The whistle was supposed to mean she was dressed and he could return, but here she was with her hair down on her shoulders and her hadajuban wet and revealing a lot of her body._

 _She took in a deep breath and walked closer to him._

' _What are you doing?' he asked softly trying to keep his eyes on her face although it was clear they wanted to go lower._

' _What feels right,' she said and raised her hand and her fingers slowly touched his lips. She always thought he had nice lips. She wondered how soft they were really._

 _He let her touch them without moving an inch. When she looked at into his eyes she could see everything she felt in that moment. Fear, confusion, thrill, lust and...love._

 _His hand went to touch her hair, 'It's so long.'_

 _He looked into her eyes again, 'You're the most amazing person I ever met. Woman or man.'_

 _She smiled at him before she leaned a bit closer to him. His hands shook, but he still leaned to her as well. When their lips met it was like the whole world disappeared. Suddenly there was no war. No duty, no struggle, no nothing. Just them there in that moment kissing with his hands moving through her back and hers moving through his hair and armour._

 _When the kiss broke, they didn't say anything. They almost never needed to speak. They could always tell what was on the other ones mind. They were connected. They were the same in ways no one could understand._

 _He started to undress himself while she kissed his neck. It should have been complicated. His brother went to houses of joy, but he never did. He should be a sweating mess, but apart from his whole body shaking with nervousness and need, he wasn't. He kissed and touched her everywhere repeating the action if she let out one of those little moans he never heard from her before. He stoke her body memorizing it as the sun was slowly going down in their little hiding spot. That day they made love for the first time._

* * *

 _She cradled her beloved's head in her arms, 'It's alright. You fought well. You're mother and brother are both save. You fought so well.'_

 _She felt tears in her eyes as she felt her eyes losing focus. She was bleeding badly as well but she was still in conscious. She looked around the battle field. There were fatal losses on both sides. Only a handful of people standing the whole place might as well be the purgatory._

' _This is all you can do? Is this the end of the great Yamato clan?!'_

* * *

Jay woke up with a start feeling dust inside her mouth and nose. She started to cough trying to get up only to find it very hard as she was pushed down with Mikey and the roof which fell on them.

She clenched her fists and tried it again lifting Mikey's arm with all the strength to crawl from under him.

Pulling her hoodie and scarf off she looked around. The subway was beyond repair ruined and collapsed all around them.

She checked Mikey's pulse letting out a revealed breath. He was just knocked out.

She stood up hearing rocks still falling down somewhere.

'LEO!' she called looking around desperately before she remembered Leo jumping one of the terrorist before the roof went down. She rushed to where she remembered the guy was standing. It was dark, but she now being close she could see a large green arm. She kneeled and started to pull out rocks.

'Leo!' she tried again and Leo jerked sitting up and looking around feverishly like it took him a moment to realize where he was before he looked at her, 'Jay.'

She nodded, 'Yea-they-'

She didn't have time to say anything as he pulled her by the hoodie toward him and kissed her stealing her breath away and cutting the train of thoughts she had inside her mind.

Jay immediately kissed him back putting her arms around his neck as he supported her back. It was for sure the most intense kiss of her life. She got lost in the kiss for a moment, just taking in the fact that they were bother alive.

He broke the kiss and checked her face, 'Are you hurt?'

'No, you?'

'I'm good,' he assured her and stood up slowly like he was making sure all his body was unhurt. She got up as well only then realizing, what could have happened. They could have been dead. The thought shook her to the core. They almost did die...

'Hey?' he said and she felt his hand on her shoulder, 'We're okay. We're okay, Jay.'

She nodded trying to get a hold of herself. He must have looked how panicked she got. She put her hand against his and smiled, 'Yeah.'

She needed to get a hold of herself and start to act for Christ's sake. They were stuck in a subway with...

'One of your brother's over there, but he's knocked out,' she said quickly as she started to make sense of things and prioritize.

Leo rushed to get the rocks off his brother and spun him on his back.

'Mikey? Michelangelo?!' Leo started to shake away his brother desperate to wake him up as Jay was standing in front of him.

Suddenly the other turtle started to move, but not in a way he was waking up but rather in a way like he was having a bad dream.

'No...NO! STAY AWAY!' He started to almost scream as he was trashing himself.

Jay felt an uneasiness in her stomach as she watched the knocked out guy fight against something in his mind while Leo was desperate to try and help him.

'Mikey!' Called Leo trying to wake him up while keeping him down so he wouldn't hurt himself.

Jay took a step closer just as Mikey suddenly punched Leo into the face with his elbow and went to punch Jay into the face with his fist. The blonde let out a small cry as the fist got too her face, which was when he stopped his eyes open even if unfocused.

Jay watched paralyzed as slowly his face was softening and he was probably waking up.

'Oh God,' said Mikey and put his hand down Leo immediately by his side with his hand on his shoulder and Jay falling to her knees breathing hard as she just realized she almost got punch full strength by a turtle who could easily hold up a subway roof or throw a terrorist across the subway. Her heart was somewhere in her throat now beating so hard it caused her whole body to shake.

'Wha-what happened?' asked Mikey confused and startled by everything around him.

Leo explained what happened while Jay tried to regain some control over her body which was still shaking. This was probably the worst night of her life. She started to force herself to calm down again. What the hell was wrong with her? She didn't have time to be the damsel in distress while they were buried in the subway.

'I…I had a dream…I don't know,' he said and looked down at his hands and body, which was when Jay finally return to herself and the situation in hand.

'Japan?' asked the blonde suddenly as the memory of her own dream came to her.

'You saw it too?' asked Leo sounding startled. Both her and Leo at the same time and they looked at each other looking horrified. Did he see it as well? The two…soldiers?

Jay nodded slowly, 'It…it was like I was someone else.'

'-Watching through someone else's eyes,' said Leo and the girl nodded. Both of them looked pretty shaken up. They saw the same things. They saw those people, felt the blood and sweat from the battles. The _Yamato_ clan. Leo realized in horror he knew the clan. He knew his father's clan. Why were they seeing it now? And how could Jay see it as well?

'I…I wasn't in Japan,' said Mikey still shaking, 'I was in a room with some guy. He…he beat me…her up,' he said.

'Her?' asked Jay softly and confused. He was a girl in his dream?

'It felt like I was inside a body of some girl,' he said and the look on his face told Leo that it was not a pleasant experience.

'I need to call Mo.'

'Mo?' asked Jay confused and looked at Leo.

'His girlfriend,' replied Leo before he stopped him, 'Mikey, we need to find Donnie and Raph before people like police and firefighters come.'

Jay shook her head, 'I'm sure I saw one flying out of the subway.'

'Raph or Donnie?' asked Leo with hope in his voice only to notice the grimace on Jay's face. She didn't know his brothers. He nodded to himself, 'Right, well this is Mikey.'

'Nice to meet you when you're not trying to punch me,' she said almost lightly before she suddenly remembered something and looked to the side where the roof blocked path to the train.

'Look, sorry about that, but I have to call Mo,' he said and picked up his phone.

'No wifi or signal down here now,' explained Leo and looked around. Donnie was close to the pillar so it was likely he was someway near the tracks. He pushed away his worry to focus on what to do now.

'Oh my God, someone was inside the train,' said Jay suddenly.

'Are you sure?' asked Leo taking a step closer. He didn't notice anyone but then again they failed to notice the terrorist hiding with the second explosive.

'Yes, I saw…red hair I think and then one of your bothers flying out of the subway as the roof collapsed,' explained Jay before looking to the side which had buried the train. Her voice held no hesitation. He believed she saw someone.

They all walked toward the damaged side of the subway.

'So what do we do now?' asked Jay with a serious look on her face.

'We can't get out through the entrance of the subway,' explained Leo, 'People are probably already out there. We can't reach anyone without a signal. Right now our best shot is to go inside the subway further through the tracks to hide. We don't know where Donnie and Raph are right now and we cannot just randomly start digging,' said Leo and looked at Mikey and Jay.

'Okay,' said the Jay with an expression which told Mikey he would surely admire Leo's girl, 'then let's get to it.'

* * *

It felt like hours since they made a whole in the rocks which didn't get burry by other rocks. Jay's hands hurt so much. While they were working on the rocks, she only then came to realization she never worked before in whole life. Not like this at least. She felt incredibly tired, but stubbornly refused to take a break even after Leo and Mikey told her to do so like three times now. She just…she had to be useful. She would be too nervous to just sit around. She needed to do something to focus her mind off the fact that someone was in the train in the subway and Leo's too brothers were nowhere to be found. They didn't talk much. All three of them were too much focused on the work and tensed.

Her gloves got torn like two hours ago, but it was worth it because when finally got to the other side she let out a startled gasp.

'What?' asked Leo confused as he looked into the hole they made.

Behind the rocks was one of Leo's brother holding Kim in his arms both of them looking frozen.

Jay didn't know what was happening. Why was Kim there of all people? Why did it look like it was ice there?

'That's my friend,' she said and covered her mouth muffling her words a bit, 'That's Kim, my captain on the squad.'

The turtles didn't waste time and pulled Kim out setting her to Jay's arms before they pulled out their brother.

Jay started to brush Kim's hair. She was so cold and asleep. Why was she here? Why would she be taking a subway?

 _Why Kim….?_

The blonde looked at the metal stuck in the other girl's leg. Despite the cold she could clearly see the blood.

The guys had to leave since the fireman and started to make their way to the subway. Jay helped Kim tighter, 'Please, just be okay.'

* * *

 **A.N:Sorry I updated last week, but I had some family stuff to deal with so I spent zero time in front of my laptop. Hope you enjoyed the chapter. Thank you for all the support. Until next time.**


	18. The Pretty Girl 06

**The Pretty Girl**

* * *

 _I don't want you to save me. I want you to stand by my side as I save myself_

* * *

Jay silently watched her hand. Her palms and fingers were ruined from the rocks and dirty she was digging in to get to Kim and Donnie. It hurt to clench her palms.

'Sweetie, you have a broken finger,' said the nurse suddenly and Jay blinked. The nurse walked up to her and tried to move Jay's pinky on her left palm only for her to hiss as pain shot through her.

'Not broken, but definitely sprained,' she said before she waved at the doctor, 'Were you already checked up? What about your parents? Legal guardians?' asked the nurse, but Jay just shook her head, 'I tried to call my mom, but she's not picking up. My phone died a while ago.'

'Do you think you can fill out your insurance? Doctor will have a look at you, okay?'

She nodded and went with the doctor to a small examination room. She felt so tired as he secured her pinky and told her to go to the nurse to fill out the papers. Her mother still didn't show up even if she left her a voice message on the phone like hours ago.

'Hey, do you have some place I can charge my phone?' she asked and the nurse nodded and took her phone to plug it in.

'Excuse me, are you Jay?' asked a woman by her side and Jay almost jumped as she was faced with a twenty years older Kim Sawyer or someone who could pass for her any day.

'Yeah, hi Mrs. Sawyer,' she said slowly and startled. The woman immediately hugged her, 'Oh my God, Jay. What happened? W-was she with you?'

Jay was so startled by all of it. The embrace, the questions, the whole encounter.

'I-I don't know. I was on a date and I was going home and she was just...there. I don't know why,' Jay said as much truth as she could while it was all sinking to her. They were both there. They weren't meant to be. Jay was supposed to spend the night with Leo and Kim wasn't supposed to be there either. Yet they both ended up there. Maybe if Jay noticed the weird people in mask sooner, maybe if she noticed Kim sooner. Maybe none of this would have happened. Maybe no one would have gotten hurt because the turtles only came because Jay called. Maybe no one would have gotten hurt. Even the terrorist would have time to leave. Never before Jay felt the crushing weight of decision as must as she did right now.

* * *

Master Splinter sat the three cups of tea in front of his sons as they were still shaken from what happened in the subway. They looked disastrous and felt even worse.

'Did Mo respond?' asked Donnie after a while brushing his face. It was strange to look at him without his mask on. He said he had to tie it around Kim's leg. Their masks were a part of them. They almost never put them off. They even stopped to sleep without them since they kept on forgetting to put them down.

Mickey nodded, but didn't sound too sure, 'Yeah, she did. She fell asleep or something...'

Both of them with their father looked over at Leo who shook his head, 'No responds.'

'Her phone is probably dead,' said Donnie to calm his brother and Leo nodded. He wasn't worried. Well, not too worried. They heard the firemen and knew that Jay was probably left with Kim in the hospital so he shouldn't be too worried that she hadn't texted him anything in the last couple of hours. Logically thinking he knew she was alright compare to Kim or Raph who they didn't even know what happened with him. Jay was alive and well when they left her so he should just calm down and silent the annoying voice in the back of his mind.

'My sons you should go to rest,' said Master Splinter, but Leo shook his head, 'Not until we at least know what happened to Raph.'

'What if he's still trying to look for us in the subway? He might enter the frozen land,' mumbled Mikey his voice filled with worry and exhaustion just like the rest of them.

Donnie shook his head and looked at his phone, 'No responds means he didn't even see the message. Maybe he got hurt and went to hide somewhere during the light.'

'Which is worse since he could be somewhere out there _hurt_ ,' said Leo just as their phones went off and they all saw Raph text back: _Safe_ _John Paul_

They all shared a relieved look and sigh.

'Cool, so everyone is okay,' said Mikey, but it was obvious there was no joy in his words.

Leo looked at him again. He remembered the way Mikey was freaked out after what he saw. He never saw Mikey so…hurt…

'What you saw…? You said you were someone else when you got knocked out,' he said slowly not waiting to cause bad memories but sort of feeling like they needed to talk about it.

Mikey looked at him with something incredibly vulnerable in behind his eyes as he hesitatively nodded.

'It was like I was in some girl's body. I could move and see everything through her eyes,' he looked down at his hands as if he could still remember what it was like to be a human girl.

'The guy tried to get in my face or her face and I just punched him. He punched me back which was when I was back in the subway with you and Jay,' he looked at Leo. He looked like he wanted to cry, 'Uh…it felt…it felt so real. I-I think there is a girl out there who…who really got hit by some guy.'

He looked away, 'That was why I wanted to talk to Mo so desperately she said she was going to talk to her ex and I just needed to make sure it was not her.'

'Do you think you would be able to identify her? Like give me some details? I could run some scans, databases, maybe it would help to find her,' said Donnie putting his hand on Mikey's shoulder, but his younger brother shook his head, 'I didn't really focus on anything just the guy.'

'Maybe if you sleep on it a bit,' said Donnie with a small nod even if Leo could tell he was only being brave for Mikey, really he was barely holding up.

Leo looked at their father who brushed his chin. He looked very troubled. He looked back at Leo, 'And you my son. You and Jay dreamed about Japan?'

Leo nodded, 'I…it's hard to explain, but I'm sure it was Japan and Jay looked like she knew as well. It was similar to what Mikey said except it felt like it was older…like this was a very very old memory and bits and pieces were foggy. I know the person through whose eyes I was seeing was from the Yamato Clan.'

All three sons looked at their father who looked lost in his thoughts, 'I see.'

'D-do you know what it means, Sensei?' asked Leo hesitantly.

Their father shook his head, 'I'm afraid not. The Yamato bloodline is very old. Do you remember anything else?'

'Jay was…Jay saw it through the eyes of the only daughter of the Aya clan,' said Leo and their father nodded, 'That might bring some light into the situation.'

They all waited for their father's respond but he only put his hand on Leo's and Donnie's shoulders, 'Please rest my sons. We know Raphael is well and at the moment nothing can be done about Ms. Jay or Kim or the stranger girl,' he looked at Mikey and nodded at him with encouragement.

'I will go to meditate about what you told me, Leonardo. All of you, get some rest.'

With that he gave them all a very authoritative look under which they all started to slowly walk to their rooms.

Leo noticed Mikey looking over at Master Splinter who waved at him to continue walking. Inside his room, all alone, he felt Jay's absence even more than before. He went to his bed and lied down. Despite his worries, he was very tired and soon sleep and dreams about blue birds overcame him again.

* * *

Jay watched as Kim's mom ripped open the bag with clothes. It felt almost violent as she destroyed the bag and threw all the content on the hospital counter.

'Most of them got cut apart so she won't be able to wear them,' said Kim's mom. Jay didn't know much about her, but the way her hands were shaking it was clear she was only barely holding up while her husband went to speak with the doctors and the police officers who were constantly looking over at her obviously annoyed that her mom still hasn't showed up.

Jay stepped a bit closer to her as the woman pulled out Kim's keys, golden cross, some coins. The clothing looked completely ruined by the blood. As Kim's mom pushed the clothes back on the counter for the nurse to go throw out Jay noticed the purple fabric. She immediately recognized it as one of the turtles' mask realizing Donnie did not have his on when they found him and Kim.

Both Kim's mom and the nurse looked surprised as Jay snatched the mask, 'Uh. I gave it to Kim.'

'Did you use it to pressure to wound?' asked the nice nurse and Jay nodded trying not to lie too much. Someone used it as she now recalled the mask being tied around Kim's leg. Just not her.

She went to sit into the waiting room again and tried to turn on her phone after it got charged for the first time since the subway.

She had a couple of texts from Nicole. First they were just nonsense like _I'm super bored_ and _Do you think if an animal can eat a meat hamburger_ until her texts got serious like _I saw KIM in the ambulance._ _Why aren't you picking up?_

She was about to text Leo to ask if Donnie wanted his mask back, but as she looked back at it and saw how much covered in blood it was she thought against it.

She put it into her pocket and went to text Nicole telling her sort of what happened. The Latina bombed her with text and questions most of which Jay had to lie about. She didn't tell her she was in the subway though. Nicole asked if she should come, but what would be the point? She needed her mom to finally come so she could leave.

Several hours passed and Kim's state going from better to worst to neutral.

 _L: How is she?_

 _J: Not good._

 _L: How are you?_

 _J:Not good…you?_

 _L: Not good._

Jay almost smiled at that before she sighed and texted.

 _J: My mom still hadn't showed up._

 _L: You think something happened?_

 _J: I don't know anymore._

 _L:How long are you going to stay in the hospital?_

'Jay,' said her mom suddenly and the blonde hid her phone before she rushed to her and hugged her. Her mom pressed her close for a moment before Charlotte pulled away from her daughter to look at her face. She brushed the small bruise which Jay had on the side of her forehead.

'Are you okay? What happened?'

Jay shook her head, 'I don't know. I just…I was coming home when I just saw this shady looking guys and then the whole subway collapsed.'

'Mrs. McClaud?' asked the police office which had been eyeing Jay the whole time waiting for her legal guardian to come.

'Ms,' said Jay's mom atomically.

'We need to ask Jay a couple of questions about what happened,' said the officer and nodded at some very formally dressed men in suits.

'Please come this way. We will speak in one of the empty rooms.'

Jay tried to find comfort in her mom's hand on her lower back, but it was no use, she was still feeling shitty as they went into the room and the men there, special FBI agents started to ask her about the subway. She tried to give as much information as she could without saying anything about the turtles. She felt sick to her stomach from thinking so much. Apparently they were playing good and bad cop as one was looking all supportive and nice while the other looked seriously pissed like she had something to do with it. Most likely he knew she was lying about certain things. Either way, they left Jay with a card to call if she remembered anything else and that they might need to speak with her some more.

Charlotte brushed Jay's hair after they left and went to sit to the waiting room for a while just as Kim's mom came and she and Jay's mom started to introduce themselves and talk a bit.

Jay looked at the little girl in her fairy costume as she approached her. She saw her come earlier with Kim's dad, 'Mommy said I could wear it for today. I guess she was trying to make me feel better.'

Jay nodded not sure how to handle a five year old whose sister was in a coma in a hospital after being buried alive in a subway and almost freezing to death. She wished her mom would stop talking so she wasn't alone with her.

Abby looked at her jacket suddenly, 'What's _that_?'

Jay looked to the side and spotted the purple mask which she washed in the hospital's sink earlier.

'It's just-'

'Mr. Turtle Hero's mask,' said Abby surprised and snatched the mask from Jay's palm, 'This means he was there to save Kimie as well.'

Jay wasn't sure how to respond to that. It meant that the Turtles rescued Abby once as well.

The little girl smiled at the mask and then at Jay, 'Then it's okay.'

'Yeah?' asked Jay not sure how could the little girl get so determinate and confident all the sudden when all Jay wanted to do was...she didn't even know. She felt like she wanted to crawl out of her skin or kick something or scream or just...something...

'Uh-huh, I thought God was being mean to Kimie since he left her all alone in that subway, but this means he sent his guardian turtle angel to take care of her and keep her safe, just like he did with me,' she said looking at the piece of fabric.

'Will you go see Kim? Mommy said, I'm not supposed to see her because I might cry too much.'

Jay nodded finally, 'Of course.'

Abby returned her the mask and nodded at it, 'You should give it to Kim. It will keep her safe.'

Jay looked at the mask again before she nodded and smiled something feeling that Abby was right, 'I will and I think you're right. It will.'

Abby grinned at her and then stepped closer. She touched her hair softly.

'Kimie always says you have nice hair. It's like a hale. Like you're an angel too,' said the little girl.

Jay watched her for a moment before she touched her hair, 'I think you and Kimie have nice hair as well. All red like it's glowing.'

Her mom finally came, 'Do you want to see Kim before we go?'

Jay nodded.

It was hard to watch Kim lying on the bed without a single movement with the only noises coming from a machine which were helping her breath and stay alive. Jay never in her life felt more useless then when she saw someone she knew like that.

She couldn't keep looking at her. It was terrible.

Just as Jay was leaving Kim's room, she would have swore she heard.

 _Jay?_

She turned around, but quickly reminded herself she hadn't slept for almost forty-eight hours so she just turned to the door ready to go when she remembered the mask and rushed back in pulling it from her pocket which was now a bit damp from the wet mask that she kept there. She carefully tied it around Kim's arm making sure she wouldn't disturb any of the tubes or monitoring tools.

She gave Kim one last look before she went out of the room leaving her to rest.

* * *

As Charlotte was driving the car Jay was looking out of the window. It was snowing now. They would only be in school for a week and then there will be Christmas Holidays. She should probably get Leo something already.

'Mom? Where were you?' she asked the older woman and looked at her.

'I tried to call you for several hours. I left voice mails too.'

The woman sighed, 'I had some things.'

Jay nodded and looked in front of her, 'Did you even notice I wasn't at home? All night?'

Charlotte sighed, 'I went out with a friend. I came back late and thought you were asleep.'

'So you didn't even check your phone?'

'Jay, what is it with the interrogation?' asked her mom upset.

'Nothing, I'm just curious what could have been so important that my mom didn't give shit about while Kim's mom was in overdrive,' said Jay feeling herself shaking with anger now. It was all coming down to her. What happened in the subway, the weird dream, Kim, Leo. It was becoming too much.

'Jay, knock it off,' said her mom and Jay felt that she was growing upset as well.

'What? So you don't have an answer?'

'You're seventeen years old!' snapped her mom. 'What do you expect me to hold your hand until you're thirty? I think I did enough for you to finally deserve a day off. Everything I did over the last eighteen years was for you so stop acting like I'm neglecting you or something. Normal kids have friends and go out in your age not get into trouble with sexual harassments almost every year. Do you realize how exhausting it all is for me? To deal with cops, police reports, and restraining orders and-'

'Stop the car please,' said Jay suddenly causing her mom to stop talking.

'What?'

'Stop the car,' repeated Jay her eyes on the road.

'What do you mean stop the car?'

Jay put her hand on the car door handle, 'I think I was pretty clear.'

Her mom his breaks as she saw Jay opening the door during the ride.

'Where are you going?'

'Don't worry. Not filling a restraining order,' she got out and shut the door without spearing her mother a second glance although she thought she saw her shocked face. Jay completely calmly walked out of her car and went to the alley knowing her mother would not follow her.

In the next ten second she heard the car start again and her mom drove off while Jay stopped at the end of the alley.

Come to think of it maybe it was stupid to get out of the car since she was still covered in dirt and dust. It was cold outside and she was quite far from her house. Although she honestly didn't feel like going there at all.

She wondered who she could go to. Option one was Nicole even though she was not in the mood to talk about Kim at all. Option two was strangely Molly even if they weren't _that_ kind of friends and it felt really rude to just invite herself to her house. Option three made her kick the nearby trashcan as she realized that the next person she would try to contact would be Kim. However, if Jay was completely honest with herself there was only one person she actually wanted to be with now.

She pulled out her phone and dialed.

He picked up on the first try. Of course he did.

'Hi, uh, I'm literally outside in some alley I have no idea where to go now or what to do.'

' _Would you like to come over?'_ he asked in a heartbeat like it wasn't even a bit deal or something. She closed her eyes and nodded feeling too damn tired to even speak.

' _Jay? Are you there?'_ asked Leo a bit worried now.

'Yes…to both questions.'

* * *

Leo was trying to calmly sit on one of the boxes in the warehouse waiting for Jay to come. _Calmly_ was a very exaggerating word since he was a nerves wreck since he heard Jay's voice.

They managed to catch a few hours of sleep, but they were all still restless and tired from what happened. They knew Raph was okay but still wanted him to come home at least until Leo offered Jay to come. How would this all end with Raph being there, he was scared to even imagine right now.

When he heard a very fainted knock on the warehouse garage door, his heart shot out like a bullet immediately speeding up as he walked closer and opened the door for Jay to come in. She was once again covering her head and hair with a hoodie only this time gray and she was wearing sneakers and gym pants from what he could tell, but the jacket was the same one from last night which puzzled him.

Her hair was still a bit wet and she was wearing the same jacket as last night. She took a shower, but why did she keep the jacket?

He pulled the hoodie off her hair and smiled at her softly, 'Are you okay?'

She took a shower, but she wasn't wearing her normal clothes. In fact the clothes she was wearing looked a lot like something she would wore to a gym which wasn't her typical choice of clothes he usually saw her in.

She shook her head, 'No.'

'You weren't even home?' he asked noting what she was wearing and that her hair looked a bit damped.

'No. I sneaked into my school and took a shower there.'

He took her hand noticing the wrapped finger, 'Is it broken?'

'No.'

'Do you want me to-'

He didn't even have time to finish the sentence as she embraced him immediately trying to hid inside him as he put his arms around her in reflex.

'Just hold me for a bit,' she mumbled and he pulled her as close as possible without hurting her standing still with her as she obviously went through a lot that day without resting or at least taking a stupid shower at home or even going home.

He felt her sinking into his body while breathing softly. She wasn't crying or shaking, she was just completely silent standing pressed against him.

He closed his eyes and pressed his face against her soft hair all thoughts of Raph or anything else falling away.

They stayed like that for a couple of moments before a box moved and they startled looked to the side where Mikey waved at them, 'Sorry, but you were gone too long and Master sent me to get you.'

Leo gave him a look not sure he believed him but he took her hand and walked toward his brother.

He grinned at the blonde, 'Hey, Jay.'

The blonde smiled a bit, 'Hey, Mikey.'

'Okay, you two lovebirds, lets head downstairs,' he said and Leo rolled his eyes before following his brother to the elevator. He noticed how Jay was taking it all in since the moment the elevator door closed them in and went down.

He was purposely looking direct at her to see her reaction when Mikey pressed the crystal to open the passage to their home.

'Welcome to our lair of fun, joy and all the nice things like puppies and unicorns and-'

'Mikey, just knock it off.'

'You're not fun. Your boyfriend is an incredibly unfunny person, Jay,' said Mike as the elevator stopped and they walked out.

He could tell by the look on her face that Jay was captured by all around her, taking in all her surroundings. She looked pretty impressed much to his delight.

She met his eyes and grinned, 'This is awesome.'

He chuckled before he motioned at her for a small tour. Mikey was mostly rambling nonstop interrupting him, but Leo let him have it since he knew he wasn't in his shape after what happened in the subway and needed a distraction and honestly Leo was just so happy that Jay was actually there, he didn't even care.

He had to admit he was a bit worried when his father asked to speak with Jay but given how calmly they spoke on the couch while Mikey and Donnie were in the kitchen he supposed it wasn't so bad.

'Don't worry,' said Donnie and nudged him a bit, 'She's nice. He will like her too.'

Leo nodded absently before giving him a smile, 'Thanks. I just want you all to be okay with it.'

Mikey was finishing his pasta, 'Bro, we're super okay with it. The problem is one hotheaded red. You know that, right?'

Leo sighed, 'I don't know if I should warn him that she's here before he actually gets here.'

Donnie nodded, 'It might not be the worst idea. If he gets too upset he will just stay out longer or you will have time to secure Jay into your room before he comes.'

Mikey whistled, ' _Your room, Leo._ Sounds _niiiice_.'

Leo shot him a room while Donnie rolled his eyes, 'Text him. It will be there then calling.'

'Too late for that,' mumbled Leo just as he sensed Raph coming through one of the tunnels. The one closest to the living room area of course.

He shared a quick look with Donnie and the both of them slowly but firmly went to the living room even Mikey peeking from his food debating if to leave it completely or just watch for now.

For a moment all three brothers and their Master were very aware of Raph's presence while he was trying to walk inside to the direction of his room.

'My son, you're home. We have a guest,' said their father just as Raph looked up and his gaze fall on the only human in the lair in the moment.

Time seemed to stopped in Leo's mind as Raph watched Jay who was without a motion sitting on the couch like she was facing a bear or tiger ready to attack her if she made the slightest move.

Raph blinked so slowly Leo seriously considered if time didn't stop before he opened his mouth clearly ready to say something.

He pointed at Jay but didn't say anything looking like someone just hit him with a brick over the head.

'Raph,' said Leo slowly, 'This is Jay. Jay, this is my second brother Raph. He's the oldest after me.'

Jay turned around on the couch and smiled at him a bit probably sensing how worried he was as he spoke and wanting to ease his nerves a bit before she looked back at Raph nodded.

'Hi.'

Raph was still looking at her weird out, but not angry which confused them all. In the next moment he simply very slowly nodded more to himself than to Jay before he went to the direction of his room.

'I...I'm going to the bed now,' he grumbled before he was gone. The whole atmosphere in the room returning back to normal after that.

Jay sighed a bit and Master Splinter put a hand on her shoulder, 'I think that's the best approval you will get today.'

She chuckled at that before she looked back at Leo and raised her eyebrows at him silently asking _What the hell was that?_

Later that day after the rest finally decided to give them some privacy and Raph actually stayed in his room the whole time. Leo decided to show the blonde his room while blushing as Mikey made corny jokes them being together in a room and Master Splinter reminding him not so subtly that if she was staying he would sleep on the couch or with one of his brothers.

Jay hesitantly walked into Leo's room. It all felt so bizarre. She was half expecting to wake up again and realize she was still trapped inside the subway. In the past twenty-four hours so many things had happened and she was so incredibly tired, but at the same time she wanted nothing more than to absorb it all.

She was in Leo's lair. In his home and everything was just so…amazing and alive and completely not what she has been expecting.

'Okay, this is weird your room is so much cleaner than mine. How is that possible?' she asked taking it all in. His room was so neat like she would expect a room in some catholic school. No posters, not clothes lying around. Everything had its place and was placed somewhere.

'Your room is pretty clean, Ms. Nervous cleaner.'

'Yeah, well if your life is a mess, your room doesn't have to be,' she said still taking it all in.

 _Is that a guitar? He plays a guitar!_

Her inner school girl was crushing hard right now.

'Oh, you should see Mikey's room then. We're speculating if he isn't part pig,' he grimaced remembering the horrible smell and look of his room on daily bases.

'No, I'm good. It's actually a very _you_.'

'I think all our rooms are very uslike,' he said and walked further inside giving her space to look around and fully get it all in.

'Sit down wherever you like,' he mumbled awkwardly not sure how to deal or act with Jay here. She looked so out of this place. He was in her room many times now, but to have her here felt strange. She was a human girl inside a sewer with several giant turtles and a rat. She was just…too clean, pure, human for this place, and yet she walked around like it was not a big deal.

She went to the wall to touch the guitar, 'You don't have this weird boy possessiveness that no one can touch your stuff, right?'

 _Only for you_

'No, act like home.'

She carefully picked it up while sitting down on his modest bed, 'Before Nicole and I started dancing my mom wanted me to try piano.'

'So instead of the squad you could have been in the band?' he asked and sat down next to her.

She grinned, 'Sure. It was a possibility.'

Jay sighed a bit while running her fingers through the guitar letting out a soft sound. It wasn't anything too melodic but it was calming. It felt like for a moment, there was finally some place which was in peace inside the world which was still moving, still turning, still in motion. In this world there was a single place which was in peace, Leo and her alone inside his room there was finally quiet and peace in the world. In the hospital there were people running around, doctors, nurses, patients, family of the patients. Then there was her mom. Then she had to be quick to go in and out of school, then she was a guest, but now…in this very moment she could finally feel the world was still.

'She's going to be okay, Jay,' said Leo suddenly and the girl's fingers froze on the strings. She didn't even realize she started to cry. Ha. Funny. She couldn't remember the last time she cried. She must have been a little girl or something.

She nodded a couple of times as Leo took the instrument away from her and sat it down next to the wall. Her hands felt so empty without the guitar. He pulled her into him, and she sank like a ship into the ocean trying to find herself inside him.

After she cried a bit and calmed down she finally decided she wanted to have the talk she was so scared to have before. Funny, she was terrified of talking with him about it two days ago. Now it just seemed pointless. Kim was fighting for her life in the hospital and they could have all died. Suddenly telling him was the easiest thing in the world. Because she knew him, and she knew he would accept it, all of it.

Jay brushed her hair to the other side of her head. Even after the shower in school, she could still feel the dust and dirt from the collapsed roof of the subway. A funny thought about it crossed her mind. If she jumped into the sewer water would she then still feel the dust and dirt from the subway?

She closed her eyes, 'There was something I wanted to tell you. Before your brothers called and before the whole thing. I wanted to tell you something.'

Leo looked up at her seeing how she was struggling with something inside her, 'You don't have to tell me. If you don't want to you, you don't have to say anything.'

Jay looked at him, 'But I want to.'

He took her hands into his looking at her so softly she wanted to cry again. How could he be so…so gentle? She saw the way he ripped the bomb with his brother from the pillar and how he and Mikey raised the damaged pillars and roof to help Donnie carry Kim out. He was so strong and yet so gentle with her.

He looked at her like she was beautiful, but not the way other men did. He didn't look at her like she was something to have, beauty to hold, to take and keep forever. He looked at her like she was to be left forever herself and admired endlessly.

Many can crave you, but only the one can truly cherish you.

She leaned toward him and kissed him ever so softly just because of the way he was looking at her.

When she leaned away she finally started, 'I…I keep on having this incidents. Bad incidents. Like…all the time. I don't want them to happen and believe me I never encourage them, but they just keep on happening.'

'What bad incidents?'

She sighed, 'Like…I can't even explain, and I'm scared to tell you because they're just so weird I…people often assume it's like I want them to happen or encourage them.'

He squeezed her hands suddenly and she smiled a little bit taking in his support, 'The first time it happened I was like ten. Nicole and I were constantly walking home from dance class with Nicole's nanny or we rode with her. Sometimes we would stop for ice cream or some pizza or just something, I guess that was how the man noticed me. I…he waited for me after school once. He knew my name, and my mom's. He knew a bunch of stuff about me. He said he was my dad and that my mom forbidden him to see me because of some bad things he did. I was a kid, I didn't know what to think. He started to meet me after school and just talk. I didn't tell my mom because…I don't know. I guess I have some daddy issues or something. He kept on insisting I'm so pretty and stuff.'

She would have brushed hair, but Leo holding her hands she just looked at him to see what he was looking like. He would have been great in poker. Not a single emotion crossed his face. He wasn't hostile looking just calm and supportive.

She continued, 'Anyway, it went on for a couple of weeks until he wanted to give me a ride home one day to talk with my mom. This was a huge red flag for me because if my mom didn't want him to meet with me, she would surely get pissed if I came home with him. He got weird and tried to drag me to his car. Uh, Nicole was well Nicole so she started screaming and a couple of parents and teachers came to help I guess. The police came and my mom got a restraining order against him. I never saw him again. Thank God. I think he got busted for something else. Anyway, uh, so that was the first time it happened. Since then it happened quite a lot. Uh, not the attempted kidnapping, but stuff like that.'

She grimaced, 'If you ever wondered why I'm so guarded and have no friends that's why. Most of my male friends from the time I was a kid…didn't want to stay friends and then acted weird and it just messed everything up. I don't even remember all the weird things which happened to me. The most infamous was my therapist trying to harass me when I was like fourteen.'

She could almost picture herself in that small office with closed curtain and the older man in his thirties sitting opposite from her in a chair, _'Could it be that maybe you are sending the wrong signals, Jay? That maybe without knowing it you're flirting with these boys? Giving them some sort of hope?'_

'So, uh, I…he tried to manipulate me, I guess. He would give me all these reasons why technically all those incidents were my fault and that no one would believe me in the next one because who would possibly believe that someone tried to kiss you or drag you into an alley or rape you over and over-'

He hugged her.

It was quick. She barely had time to realize it, until she was buried into his chest feeling the warm of his body and his unique smell all around her and finally letting her own chest breath again, 'I'm sor-'

'Please, don't say you're sorry,' he whispered, 'You have nothing to be sorry for. I'm sorry for interrupting you, but please don't say you're sorry.'

His hand went into her hair and he stroke it before pulling her closer, 'None of those things were your fault. You absolutely did not ask for them or encourage anyone. They were just assholes who thought they could take anything which they found pretty.'

He kissed the side of her face, and she let out a loud sigh of relief nodding, 'Thanks.' She barely let it out without crying again.

'I want to finish it,' she said and pulled a bit away to look at him, 'He just started to talk about these things and how if he tried something no one would believe me. I just I panicked and when he came at him I ripped my clothes and screamed for my mom. Luckily she was outside with the nurse. Ironically I started to go there because of all those things which were happening.'

She put her hands lightly over his palms while she was still so close to him almost pressing or hugging but not quite.

'Anyway, uh, after that, mom stopped forcing me to see a therapist. The only person I told about this was Nicole and she took it the wrong way assuming I didn't tell her things. When she stopped calling me and hanging out with me, I didn't stop her, I didn't like try to be friends. Uh, the most recent thing, which is kind of the reason why my mom has been so…well cold is because her ex boyfriend tried to kiss me when he got drunk. I guess she finally started to think it was me who was seeking out these situations and just…still if you ever wondered why I'm so guarded and unfriendly here it is,' she started to cry at the ended and Leo just pulled her closer hugging her completely, hiding her away from the world, in his home, his room, his arms.

He let her calm down for what felt like hours telling her over and over again. It was not her fault and she was not to blame for what happened with those…monsters. He tried to keep calm. He tried to be calm for her, but he was raging inside. She was a girl. She was a kid and _they_ put her into that position. They made her feel like it was her fault when really she was the victim. They, these assholes and monsters did this to her and to other girls and women. They saw it almost every day that they had to get engage because someone was feeling like he could do this to a woman. He felt disgusted with those men. He felt sick to his stomach from what Mikey told them, and to think these kind of situations and things were happening to Jay because some men were creating them was making him incredibly angry.

He would never imagine it was possible to have such terrible things happen to you for being pretty.

He kissed her again knowing it wouldn't help, but hoping she could at least feel his support and love.

* * *

Leo let Jay fell asleep in his arms before he gently put her on his bed and lied behind her. After a couple of moments she turned her back toward him but kept close. He watched how her hair was slowly drying and gaining the bounciness and width it usually had. She hadn't slept for two and half days. She deserved to rest and so did they.

He told himself that he would just wait for her to fall asleep and then go on the couch. He didn't want to go against Master Splinter wishes or did he want to get mocked and teased by his brothers. But the moment he was actually holding her like this it was incredibly hard to let her go. She was...she was Jay. She was so much he couldn't even put it to words. When he first met her he was strike by how beautiful she was and seems not bother at all that he was a turtle. In fact she looked amazed and like...she looked at him like he was masterpiece making it hard to breath because no one as beautiful as her ever looked at _him_ like that. But she was so much _more_ than that. She was very brave and firm almost to the point of stubborn, but the way he watched her move the rocks to get to Kim even when he saw her gloves ruined on the ground, he couldn't think it was a bad thing and he didn't want to. She wouldn't stop even if him and Mikey told her to just because she wanted to help. He could see she cared for people even if she tried to look like she had an ice cold wall build around her. She snuck at night to go see Nicole after she called her and waited in the hospital for hours with Kim until her mom came. She was clever and a fighter who has been through hard times, but always looked like she wasn't moved by any of it. She only ever showed her weakness to him and for that he felt incredibly grateful.

 _God, I love you, Jay._

He suddenly felt her stir like she woke up.

 _Did he just say-?_

 _Did I say it out loud?_

Jay suddenly very slowly sat up and turned around to face him shock and a bit of fear on her face. Something in her eyes told him exactly what was happening and with an identical look of shock and fear he sat up as well looking at her.

 _Did she just hear me?_

 _Did he just hear me?_

Both of them opened their mouth and let out startled gasped.

 _YOU CAN HEAR ME?_

* * *

 **A.N: Okay, here you go. Enjoy. Hope you will like it and as always thanks for all the support.**


	19. The Popular Girl 05

**The Popular Girl**

* * *

 _Nothing hurts more than being disappointed by the single person you thought would never hurt you._

* * *

Raph was lying in the bed thinking about karma. You know the universal revenge plot just waiting to happen to you when you least expect it. Like him for instant. He was just walking back home after his day with Nicole who he had sex with feeling on top of the world. He jumped into the sewer to make sure his brothers couldn't smell Nicole or the sex on him and pretty much didn't even mind that he smelled like something died in a bag and was finally throw out of it after like six months of rotting there. You know, the sex was good and being with Nicole just…made him happy? Calm? Not a total douchebag hothead? Women.

Anyway, he was like in a pretty good mood. Then he came home. He honestly just wanted to go take a shower or go to his room or something. So his brothers wouldn't ask too many questions. He mumbled a greeting sensing all his family staring at him for some reason.

 _Damn it, do they know? How? I smell like cat shit! There is no way they can sense it. Maybe Master Splinter?_

He looked up at him but instead of his father, his eyes landed on a human chick sitting next to him on the sofa.

He stopped in track completely still as he watched the girl with blonde hair calmly looking at him.

Now, sure, they were teens so teenage girls shouldn't be a problem. Even though they were giant ninja turtles, teenage girls shouldn't be _too_ much of a problem.

BUT THIS GIRL WAS A HELLA OF A PROBLEM!

In the moment he saw her and she said her slow _hello_ to him while Leo introduced her he understood that he was an idiot. No, no, he really was. He was an actual brain dead idiot.

He nodded at her slowly and walked to his room forgetting about the shower completely because _he was a fucking idiot!_

So now he was in his bed still smelling like shit, his covers smelling like shit, his damn bed smelling like shit and his whole room probably smelling like it too. But none of that mattered since he was feeling like shit which was worst than any of the smells.

He sighed and closed his eyes again trying to put it all together. Karma was giving him this _shit_ because of all the times he was a raging knucklehead who fucked up and exploded. Yup, that was it. And she was giving it back to him in the form of Nicole's Jay and Leo's Jay being the same freaking _Jay._

He opened his eyes. It was insane. How in the world, no, how in NY did Jay turned out to be _the_ Jay? How? Explain it to him, because he has serious trouble accept it let alone figure out what to do with it. After all his talks with Nicole it was obvious she and Jay were friends, but Nicole felt like she was always compared to her and sort of in her shadow, so if he told her that his brother was dating Jay she would freak out. He didn't know a lot of women but this he knew. Nicole was a confident strong and very tempting girl with a personality which was a bit twisted but in a good interesting way, but when it came to Jay she got incredibly insecure and doubted herself and everything about her. It was stupid as hell, but then again. He sometimes felt like that when it was something he could be compared with all perfect Leo. Ha, Nicole once said they were made of the same damaged goods.

He smirked a bit as she was sort of right.

There was a knock on the door which broke his train of thoughts.

'Come in,' he called annoyed. He didn't sit up, but with how quiet were the footsteps, almost undetectable, he figured it was Leo.

'Jay left, so you can stop sulking and…'

Raph blinked as Leo stopped talking and looked up at him only to find Leo covering his nose, 'Raph, what's that smell? Did you fell in the sewer?'

'Yeah,' he said sounding as tired as he felt.

'Okay, well, Jay left so you can go shower,' said Leo sounding a bit less annoyed seeing that Raph was not in his usual mood.

'Hey, are you alright?' he asked eyeing him suspiciously, but with concern.

'Just tired.'

'Where we you during the explosion?' asked Leo slowly and came to sit on his bed. Raph didn't even comment on it.

'I got hit into the head it knocked me out. I had to wait in some shitty garbage bean until night fell again.'

Leo nodded, 'I'm glad. You're okay.'

Raph looked up at him, 'Was it bad?'

'Donnie and one civilian almost froze to death,' said Leo and sighed his voice still heavy with the weight of what happened.

The girl from Nicole's school who was on the internet taking in the ambulance. He didn't even see her in the subway, but after the hit into the head he was pretty out of it so maybe he just didn't notice another girl.

'Froze?'

'The bomb had some chemical in it that caused the part of the subway which was buried to start freezing. The girl is in bad shape.'

Raph sat up, 'So what those assholes were terrorist?'

'Looks like it,' mumbled Leo before he turned to look at Raph, 'Hey, are we okay? I know you're still upset about Jay, but…this can't go on forever you know. I don't want you to be her number one fan, but you have to accept that I'm with her and I…I love her, Raph.'

That knocked the air out of him a bit. His brother…like yeah, he knew Leo wouldn't be one to fool around with some girl and not care for her, but he actually said he _loved_ her.

'Whoa, you got sappy,' he said, but smiled so when Leo shot him glare it was short lived before he smiled as well.

'Yeah, well, she does that to me,' he crossed his arms.

Raph looked away, 'I want you to be happy, big bro. I'm pissed because. I don't know how this is supposed to work out. April is different. She's just our big sister, but an actual girlfriend. I don't know how to imagine it. Like she would start hanging out for date nights and stuff? And does she get that this ugly mug isn't exactly one you can bring home to mama?' he asked and pinched Leo's cheek.

The other turtle shoved him away, 'Knock it off. We get that, but in the end it doesn't matter, I guess.'

'Yeah, more like you are in denial.'

'Maybe, but for now, I want to be with her, and she wants to be with me so I guess I will take it for now.'

Raph watched him. Leo wasn't your airhead loverboy. He wouldn't just fall in with a pretty face. If he fell for this chick, she had to be all that like Nicole said. She had to accept him then, and he couldn't bring himself to tear it down.

'She can come again,' said Raph already know that if came between choosing his and Leo's happiness he would always be a good brother, 'I will even ask her how was her day.'

Leo groaned before he chuckled, 'Cute. Just don't get too nice.'

'Ha, scared she would fall for the better looking brother?' asked Raph, but it was clear he was joking.

'She already did,' shot back Leo and got up.

Raph shook his head, 'Keep telling ya self that.'

'Don't have to we can read each other thoughts,' he said lightly like it was a joke, but when Raph looked at him he looked very Leo serious like.

'Come again?'

'Go shower. We got few news for you.'

* * *

Nicole let out an annoyed sound as Jill kicked her foot under the table at the cafeteria, 'What the hell was that for?'

'Stop tapping that stupid foot. What the fuck is wrong with you? Having a withdraw?' asked the other girl annoyed.

Nicole looked down at her leg just as started to tap again and stopped crossing her legs. Jill wasn't completely wrong she was lacking something only it wasn't her usual choice of drugs. It was _him_.

She was furious as he was doing again. He was ghosting her. HER! Like fucking asshole turtle neck!

After their time in the rubbish motel she would think she would leave an impression, a mark, but the fucking bastard just went completely AWOL on her and didn't answer any of her texts of phone calls. Sure she only called like once and texted like two times, but she was playing it cool for God's sake.

'Hi,' started Carmen as she came to their table. Nicole frowned at her. It wasn't anything person. Well, it was…she thought Carmen was a bitch stereotype cheerleader, but apart from that they were cool.

'We're doing a collection for some things for Kim and her parents while she's in the hospital. Do you girls want to chip in?'

Jill sighed and actually started to pull out her wallet and Nicole followed but she was getting furious. Carmen was such a fucking bitch. She was milking Kim like her own personal loss and was acting as if the girl was already dead. Nicole felt disgusted looking at her. She even had the nerve to spoke and cry on TV when Nicole saw her without a single tear just a couple of moments before.

'Oh, Jay, there you are. We have been looking everywhere for you. We have a cheerleading emergency meeting today after 5th period. Be on time please,' said Carmen and started to walk away after she put Nicole and Jill's name down.

Nicole turned to the blonde and was surprised to see her looking so well different. She wasn't sure what it was but it was like Jay was almost glowing and at the same time looking very tired and dressed very poorly.

'What did you have a wardrobe malfunction?' asked Jill with a chuckle at the gym clothes Jay was wearing.

Jay sat down next to Nicole, 'I was either with Leo or Kim in the hospital all weekend and Monday.'

Nicole blinked her frown finally softening a bit, 'How is she?'

'Not good. They did like three different surgeries and she still hasn't woken up from the coma. They…they said that even if she did she might not be the same. They said she has a massive head injury and apparently the leg will never heal completely. Her heart stopped one time during the night,' said Jay sounding incredibly tired, 'It was very scary.'

Something ached inside Nicole when she heard this. Kim Sawyer was the nicest girl in school. She was your every day sweetheart. You just…you felt light and candy and rainbows and unicorns when you talked to Kim Sawyer. She always looked like she cared for people. _Actually selflessly cared for people_. Honestly no one deserved something like this less than Kim Sawyer.

She wondered what kind of a person she was if here she was obsessing over Raph not calling her while Kim was fighting for her life in the hospital.

'Let's not talk about it anymore,' said Jill looking down all of the sudden as well, 'My brother woke up from a week in the coma. He just sometimes forgets to little things, but apart from that he's fine. Kim is a healthy cheerleader and a church girl. She'll pull out of it,' said Jill and stood up walking away, 'I'm going to call my Beau.'

Jay turned to Nicole after Jill's speech.

'Her baby brother was in a car accident with their dad. Sometimes he forgets little things like why he came into a room, do chores or things they told him to do. Other times he gets dress in the middle of the night and goes out because he thinks it's morning and he has to go to school.'

Jay looked surprised, 'She never said that before.'

'She's Jill. Not exactly the person who talks about the feelings.'

Jay watched Nicole for a moment as she played with her food, 'What about you?'

Nicole shrugged her shoulders, 'I don't know. I barely know Kim.'

'It's not about knowing someone to sympathize with someone.'

Nicole looked down at the table, 'I think people don't deserve shitty things to happen to them, not _this_ kind of shitty, but from all of us, I think Kim is the last person who should be going through this.'

A moment had passed before she felt Jay put her head on her shoulder. Despite thinking about Kim and well Raph, Nicole felt herself calming down a bit with Jay so close to her. Human touch and whatnot.

She sighed, 'I totally fucked and fucked up with my mystery guy.'

Jay nodded against her shoulder, 'I told Leo about well _stuff_ , he took it okay.'

Nicole smirked. Even if it stirred a bit to know that Jay's life was working out always, she was glad.

She moved a bit to look at Jay, 'So when do I meet this loverboy of yours?'

'Probably when I will meet your fuckboy? So what happened there?'

'Same old. Though he was different, turns out he's not. Shocker. We had sex and he's been ghosting me since so,' she shrugged her shoulders hoping to look casual.

'Then he's an asshole, who wouldn't want you?'

Nicole shrugged her shoulders, 'I'm an asshole too. Anyway, enough with my sappy stories. Let's talk about something less terrible like puppies or whatnot?'

'You're allergic,' pointed out Jay.

'Damn it, work with me, McClaud,' she told her annoyed.

* * *

It was a couple of days now. Nicole was practically sure that Kim Sawyer was one of most used words in vocabulary. It wasn't a moment that she didn't hear her name whispered or talked about in the hallway. Each time she had this urge to snap at someone to shut the hell about her already partly because Kim was in the hospital not dead like those cheerleading vultures were presenting it and partly because it was better to be angry at that then to be upset about Raph. Like the hell? He still didn't call her? Or texted her or something?

She was just _so_ pissed right now at him that even if he did call she would probably hung up on him. Fucking prick. Oh and winter holidays were starting tomorrow so she would have to channel all her anger toward Raph since she wouldn't be in school. Awesome.

She didn't drive Jay that day. She didn't feel like seeing her since Jay had this look on her face which told her she was nonstop thinking about Kim, not to mention her relationship was great which meant that Nicole felt even more jealous than usual. Damn it.

It was just her luck that just as she was about to go to hallway she ran into David.

'Hi,' he smiled at her looking genuinely happy to see her.

'Hi.' She hadn't been in touch with him for a while. His hair was growing out a bit. Still it made him look nice.

'I actually wanted to see you.'

Nicole raised her brows, 'Alright?'

He pulled out some sort of small package, 'Merry Christmas. You said you liked it when we were passing that window shop one time.'

Nicole chuckled, 'Don't tell me it's that weird porcelain duck?'

'You said it was cute.'

'It is,' she said and looked down at the small package taking it from his hands, 'I don't have anything for you though.'

David shrugged his shoulders, 'It's cool, Nicole. Listen, uh, I know we haven't hung out in a while, but maybe we could plan something for this holidays? We always spent at least one day together?'

Nicole nodded, 'Sure.' She hadn't been around David since what happened in the alley and then her party. She saw him in the hallways but pretty much kept their meetings to minimum. Still, this was a nice gesture.

He then reached out and touched a piece of her hair, 'You look good by the way. As usual.'

Nicole smirked at that, 'Thanks.'

She started to walk away, 'Come on, won't you tell me I look good?'

'Nope,' she called back at him smirking.

'You're breaking my heart over here, Nicole,' she heard just as she was about to get to class. The truth was that with David things never were complicated. He just a guy who knew what he wanted from her and she knew what she wanted from him. They weren't dating. They were just having fun. In many ways they were the same. They knew they couldn't ask from more from each other and they didn't.

'Hey, let's go to the club tonight.'

'Cool, away from all this grief drama. Sawyer's not even dead,' he said looking just as annoyed about it as she felt.

She nodded and watched as he turned around walking away. She felt like skipping all of the sudden herself. Not using Kim as an excuse, but just skipping the day and doing something different than seeing the face of her lame classmates.

She knew hanging out with David would be fun. It always was and it would definitely get her mind out of Raph. She nodded to herself and went for the bathroom first to sneak out of school later.

She would just go to the club have fun with David and their friends and forget about Raph and him not wanting to do anything with her. Fuck he was such a prick! Why didn't she see it? What did she honestly believed that virgin boys were better? They were still _guys_ turtle or not.

Nicole rushed into the bathroom only to startle Molly Jones who was there by the mirror.

She opened her mouth shocked as she spotted the terrible bruise on her face. For a moment she remembered her own bruising from a couple of weeks ago and went closer, 'Damn. What the hell happened to you?' She asked her mouth catching the best of her again. Well, she was always the vocal one of all the people she knew so.

Molly shook her head looking terrified and went to return to the stall, but Nicole caught her arm, 'Wait! I...I can fix that. I'm...I'm really good with makeup. _Obviously_.'

Molly watched her confused for a moment before Nicole added, 'If you let me. It's just a peace offer.'

The girl with the pink hair slowly nodded and Nicole guided her to the sinks again nodding at her to sit up.

A few moments had passed as she was working before Molly signed her something.

'Huh?'

The girl rolled her eyes and picked up her phone quickly typing something.

 _Won't you miss first period?_

Nicole grimaced, 'Fuck that. This is way more fun.'

Molly smiled a bit as Nicole continued to make the bruise slowly disappear under the makeup. This was easy. Nicole knew she sucked in most things. School wasn't her cup of booze. She used to dance when she was younger but that was also just something she was decent enough. She couldn't play any instruments or wasn't great at any sports, but she was pretty great at makeup if she could say so herself. She often caught herself thinking about people and how they would look better with different shades or a bit of a makeup.

Molly watched her silently, but that was kind of the only way this could go. When she was done she took a step back and made an approved noise, 'Damn, I'm good.'

She signalled for the girl to turn around and she did she actually looked stunned.

Nicole crossed her arms, 'You know, you're very pretty. Makeup or not. Just keep the bruises to minimum.'

Molly rolled her eyes before she looked at her and signed her something.

'All I know curse words, Jones. Work with me here,' she said and nodded at her phone where Molly already started to type something.

 _Want to skip?_

Nicole read it and smirked, 'Do you do weed?'

* * *

So here they were on the rooftop of Nicole's old dance school (one of her favourite spots to hang out with) looking down at the people passing by with their days.

Nicole shook her head. They had been mostly silent since it was a bit weird to be with someone who couldn't talk. Maybe it was due to the drugs but Nicole felt very concerned with that.

She sensed Molly watching her for a moment before she pointed at her and raised her brows so Nicole assumed she was asking about why she wasn't in class.

The Latina shrugged her shoulders before she found herself saying, 'This asshole has gotten inside my head.'

The other girl blinked and suddenly Nicole actually felt like talking, 'It's just so fucked up. You know I keep on meeting him knowing about two or three things about him. So the whole strangers thing is hot as hell and he's kind of a jerk who called me like junky whore, but I'm actually into it because I'm an asshole too who called him an ugly dick hero. You know like we're made out of the same damaged goods? Anyway,' stopped Nicole as she took a deep breath, 'But he's also sort of a good guy and I thought that maybe he was _a good_ guy, but of course, we screwed and he didn't contact me since so,' she shrugged her shoulders, 'I'm seriously an idiot. I mean, I know he's an asshole, so why did I think it was different?'

She took a drag of the joint, 'Momentary brain damage for sure.'

Molly kept on looking at her for a moment before she took her phone and typed something. Nicole turned to read.

 _Well, then he really is an asshole because for the record your kind of a good guy too. Even if you're a bitch and an asshole._

Nicole grinned at that before she looked at Molly who was smirking at her.

'Whatever, Peculiar.'

She shoved her a bit and Nicole chuckled before Molly took the joint from her hand and took a drag.

Nicole clicked the heels of her shoes together, 'Fucking holiday.'

Molly nodded and the two continued to watch the sky and people underneath them.

'Hey, how does a dude know you came if you don't even let out a fake sound?' asked Nicole suddenly and Molly coughed a bit before she shot her a wide eyed look.

The other girl shrugged, 'What? I always wondered about it I just thought it would be too rude to ask then.'

Molly gestured her hands with a disbelieved look on her face as if she was asking if now it _wasn't_ rude?

'I thought we were bonding,' she said it like it was no big deal and Molly watched her for a moment before she smirked and shook her head. She took another drag before she let out a very odd breathed in sound and looked at Nicole.

It took a moment for Nicole to catch on what it meant but with Molly smirking like that she just knew.

She burst out of laughter and with the way Molly's shoulders were shaking she was laughing a bit too.

Ha. Who would have thought she and Molly Jones could hit it off like that?

They should start the club of bruised chicks with bad taste in guys. They could have t-shirts and what not.

Nicole suddenly thought about it and looked over at Molly, 'Hey, whoever, that fucker is.'

Molly looked over at her again, 'Don't let him treat you like shit. You deserve better and if he can't see that and hurts you he deserves a fucking kick in the ass.'

Molly took a drag before she passed it on to her and pointed at her nodding which basically meant she thought the same went to her.

Nicole chuckled, 'I guess every girl is fuckedup when it comes to men.'

Molly nodded just as her phone beeped. Nicole watched as she picked it up and typed something while smiling a bit. It wasn't just the smile. It was _the_ smile. The cute one you only see people have when they're doing something they love.

'Who's that? _Him?_ ' asked Nicole and Molly quickly shook her head the smile there.

She showed her the phone where she typed but didn't sent _just a friend_. Nicole rolled her eyes, 'Yeah, right. No one smiles for friends like that, Molly.'

The girl gave her a look and Nicole realized it was the first time she actually called her, her name.

They shared a look before Molly returned to her phone and Nicole to her smoke thinking about everything.

She realized that she was changing a bit. She had been for a while now. It started the night in the alley when she almost got shot and met Raph. If neither of those things happened she would just take the drugs go to a party with David, fuck with him and then go home to sleep it all off. Instead she called and got Jay back to her life, she was making things right with her and sort of with Molly, she started to care for Kim a bit and got to know Raph. Sure some bad things happened like him ghosting her and her making out with Matt, but still. She had Jay back even if it came with insecurities.

Molly touched her shoulder suddenly and showed her phone.

 _Did you go see Kim? In the hospital?_

This surprised Kim since they didn't mention her this whole time, 'No, she's…she's a good person. But you know we're not close. Jay has been though. She has been there almost the every day. She's still in coma.'

Molly nodded looking down and upset.

'Makes you realize about how sucky life can be sometimes,' she said and sighed, 'I just wish…I don't know I guess I wish that life was fair. Like if you're shitty then fine shitty things can happen to you, but if you're the good guy, why do bad things happen?'

Molly shrugged her shoulders before she typed something again.

 _I guess the world is just really unfair like that._

'Yeah,' said Nicole and took another smoke. This was some serious talk for joint.

 _Would you really want shitty things to happen to you?_

Nicole grimaced, 'They already are, dude.'

Molly suddenly looked very pale before she closed her eyes. Nicole didn't know why she looked like this, but she put her hand over hers and squeezed it, 'Whatever it is it can't be that bad. I can't imagine you being a shittier person than me.'

Molly shook her head, but didn't say anything just let Nicole hold her hand for a while until they went home. Last day of school was officially over.

* * *

'Hey, are you going out today?' asked Yolanda as she went passed her room.

She turned around and nodded, 'Yeah, with some friends.'

She was just getting ready. She had a new red dress. She wanted it to be topical to the upcoming holidays. She knew she looked hot in it which meant she would get attention of people which meant she would feel good about herself. That was pretty much the only reason she was going out in the first place. She needed to get those depressed feelings out of her. The day with Molly Jones brought nothing for her. She needed to freaking not care about shit again.

'I like the dress.'

Nicole smirked at her through the mirror. Apart from the whole step-mom cliché Yolanda wasn't too bad. She didn't want to play house with Nicole and wasn't sucking up too much to her like dad's previous girlfriends so she was fine with her for the most part. After the divorce there just comes a time when you realize this is how it's going to be and you can't do shit about it just get used to it. For Nicole that time came when she realize she can get whatever she wanted if she played the upset child of the divorce. Anyway, the point was she didn't think she was that bad. Sure she was clearly a child bride who was either really in love with her dad _too_ much for her own good. (she was sure her dad was cheating on her) Or she just wanted his money. (Not the best plan since, Nicole knew he made her sign a pre-nup)

'Yeah, it's nice.'

'I hope it's okay, that you won't spent the holiday's with us this year. You're father surprised me with the trip.'

'It's okay. He told me in November and arranged it with my mom so, I don't mind. I will probably spend them in Jill's anyway.'

Yolanda looked confused, 'Oh, your mom is not-'

Nicole made and grimace and the other woman nodded, 'She's not a Christmas person.'

That was one word for it. In fact her mom was not a _mom_ person either and pretty much living out of the cash she got from the divorce. Nicole didn't mind all that much. Apart from having a Christmas party and dinner with her dad and Yolanda, Christmas didn't mean all that much to her. Sure the presence were great and school time off was the best, but really she wasn't into the big fat guy in red all that much.

She put on a coat over her dress to see how she looked and watched as Yolanda stepped behind her and fixed her hoodie a bit, 'You're so pretty, Nicole. You should try a beauty pageant.'

Nicole grimaced, 'Thanks, I'm very pretty, but I don't want to be that much of a cliché.'

'I think people know how amazing you are,' said the older woman and Nicole momentary didn't know what to say. Sure, Yolanda was always nice and sometimes caught her off guard with stuff like this, but she still wasn't used to it. She didn't really know how to react to stuff like this.

'Well, Thanks, uh Merry Christmas. Have fun on the trip.'

Yolanda smiled and hugged her a bit, 'You too, Nicole. I hope you have a great Christmas. '

When she left her room, Nicole briefly thought that maybe this was how a mom was supposed to act. Well semi-mom there was still the whole letting the kid stay out all night and having weekly wild parties in the house, but yeah, maybe this was how supportive moms looked like. Not that Nicole would know.

She chuckled at the stupid thoughts and shook her head. Who cared? She was going out to have fun, to not think about sad and upsetting things like Raph, her mom, Kim or freaking anyway.

Nicole was the type of person who enjoyed life and everything which life could bring you. She could be kicking and screaming angry in her room about Raph every day, but instead she put on a nice dress and high boots and went to a club with David and Jill and Kyle and others jumping around and drinking and getting high as hell. Maybe that wasn't the ideal way to cope. Sometimes that was all she needed. Giggling with Jill behind the table while the boys bought them drinks, or dancing with them on the dance floor. Why ask for more? Why do more when this was what made her feel good about herself?

'What about your sugar daddy?' she half shouted to Jill at one point.

'Spending time with his family,' shouted Jill rolling her eyes before she turned back around to some of David friends and kissed him.

Nicole chuckled and let David press her back closer to his front.

They were dancing so close she could feel how excited he was. When he spun her around, he pulled her closer at one point just like all those times before and kissed her. David was one of the best kissers she knew. He was good at it like he was in many other things. Nicole knew she wasn't in love him She never was in love with anyone, but with David there was an understanding between them. And they were good together. So good. The chemistry was instant since the first day they met in Bio. She was sitting next to Jill and Carrie when he walked into the room and their eyes met. It was obvious they both liked what they saw. They were playing a bit of a game. It took them about a month before they actually hooked up and started to go on and off again. They have been with people and each other. It was never serious just fun. No jealousy. No feelings, just fun and sex.

He deepened the kiss and she kissed him back. In that moment she didn't think about Raph or about whatever happened or didn't happen at her party. Not her mom, or how holy was Kim or wonderful and beautiful was Jay. All of that was gone. All there was was just kissing and touching with the music blasting around them.

It was a hot kiss, same as always. It was always hot. She remembered how it always made her weak in her knees to be kissed by him and want to jump him right there. It was like her body always knew that David was good in bed and wanted more the moment he touched her. It was always like that...and yet right now she didn't feel a thing. It didn't make her feel the thrill it always did, it just felt...blank. No feeling, no emotion, no nothing. It was like she was empty and just mechanically doing something like breathing. No emotion or pleasure just a simple work of the body like walking.

She broke the kiss and frowned, 'You okay?'

She shook her head and rushed to the rest rooms. They were separated from dance floor and tables by a hallway.

It was empty in there so she just pressed her shoulder against the wall and brushed her hair away from her face. What the hell was wrong with her? She felt herself slowly sobering up. This never happened before. Not with David. Not with anyone really. She got weird with others after Matt, but it was still kissing this felt just...empty.

David came after her and put his hands on her cheeks causing her to look at him, 'Hey, are you okay?'

She shook her head looking into his blue eyes. He was such a pretty boy. He always made her feel good. Why not now?

'No, I don't know.'

He came to her again pressing her against the wall blocking her way. They've done it in places like this a lot too.

He kissed her again and she kissed him back. She felt his hands running over her shoulders, her back then under her dress caressing her thighs. She felt the touch, but it did nothing for her. She was so confused.

She kissed him harder hoping for a reaction. Anything really.

When he reached for her panties she realized how much not turned on she was. She was completely dry. This never happened to her before. She was always high on something. She was high on life. She danced with him, bodies pressed together so many times before and it always ended up with sex.

When she heard his zipper come undone, she pushed him away and went into the girl's bathroom. He followed her. No one was around as far as Nicole's clouded mind could tell.

'Come on, come here,' he said, his voice all soft when he took her shoulder and pulled her closer. Even with his pants and underwear still on he started to jerk into her probably trying to get her on, but she just didn't feel anything.

'No, wait, I'm too drunk,' she lied through her teeth as he was kissing her neck. It was like she was a doll. Not feeling anything just being used and played with.

He gripped her shoulder a bit harder, 'Come on, Nicole. Come on, please.'

She closed her eyes for a moment and pushed him off of her, 'Alright.'

He tried to catch her hand but instead she went to her knees and pushed her hair away he already started to push himself into her face. She felt...she felt so weird. Like she was out of her body. Like this was someone else, whose hair David was gripping in his fist. She just did what she's done so many times before until she finally heard him let out that squeaky noise he usually did when he came.

She moved away as he started to grab a few tissues for hands at the wall near them.

Nicole just watched as he started to zip himself up. She had to grab the sink to get up from the floor she felt her knees were very weak in the moment. He didn't even offer her his hand.

'Hey, do you want me to-'

'I'm going home,' she said and walked to the door, he didn't even stop her. She to the middle of the dance floor to Jill and hugged her, 'Let's go home.'

The blonde looked like she had too much too so she just let herself be dragged by Nicole.

Some guys told her she was smoking and offered to buy her a drink, but she full on ignored them waving down a cap and pushing Jill inside.

The blonde pressed her head against Nicole's shoulder, '...You and ...avid...do...'

She was so drunk.

Nicole was quiet and just looked outside the window. She told the driver to wait for them as she helped bring Jill to the elevator of her building and up pressed the code for her apartment.

She went outside by the taxi didn't wait for her, so she just stood there looking at the spot like it would magically appear in front of her. Like suddenly it would be there and everything would be okay and make sense, because never in her life did Nicole felt like her whole world didn't make sense.

In fact Nicole never felt so empty and confused. She almost thought she lost her mind, because as she stood there looking at the spot for about ten good minutes it was like her brain shut off and she didn't know what she should do. Like she didn't know she should have call a new cap and go home.

* * *

Raph was starting to get nervous. He spotted Nicole on the street with her friend who was very much drunk and barely standing. Nicole being the one who was dragging her in fact. He felt like he wanted nothing more than to go talk to her, but he knew he couldn't. He promised himself that he would be a good brother to Leo and leave Nicole be. Leo was dating Jay who was Nicole's weak spot. If the Latina found out she was hooking up with while his brother was with Jay, she would definitely start to compare everything and feel just as bad as she always did about the blonde.

Besides Leo actually loved this girl. _Loved_. He didn't love Nicole. He barely knew her. Sure she was awesome and hot and he wouldn't let anything bad to her, but…Leo was actually in love with Jay. It…he just didn't have it in him ….

Yet seeing her there on the street was…torture. It was a week that he was making sure not to meet her anywhere and here she was on the street trying to get her friend to the cap while some guys were coming up to them. Nicole didn't seem to know them or want to talk to them. She just got into the cab with the blonde and they left.

He was very tempted. God, he was so tempted to follow them, but how could he? He wasn't faster than a cab and he would definitely do something stupid like go talk to her.

He returned to his patrol with Donnie who seemed incredibly quiet lately. It was strange. He was always the silent type but now it was almost too much.

'Hey, Don, you good?' asked Raph as he saw Donnie spacing out again. The geek turned toward him and nodded after a moment, 'Yeah, sorry.'

'No problem, but you okay? What's up with you?' he asked trying to sound concern and brotherly and not offending.

Donnie shrugged his shoulder, 'Not-nothing, it's nothing.'

Raph blinked, 'You sure?'

'I just keep on having these…dreams…they make me a bit sleepless.'

Raph nodded, 'Alright, are they bad?'

Donnie shook his head, 'No, just confusing. I see…uh, Kim. I see Kim in my dreams. I don't know why.'

Raph crossed his arms, 'The girl from subway?'

Donnie nodded and Raph, 'Bro, you know you did all there was right? It wasn't like you could do more. You saved her.'

'I-I know that. Rationally anyway I look at her given our situation I did all I could, and yet… the dreams keep happening every day,' said Donnie and looked up at him.

'Are they nightmares? That you try to save her and can't-?'

'No, well, once, but usually she's just…there. Always,' he said and looked at Raph desperate for some answer which Raph really didn't have.

'Well, maybe, maybe you could just you know tire yourself out. How about after patrol today we train until for a hour or two that might knock you out? Also cut it out on the coffee, man. It's not good for you,' said Raph and Donnie sighed, 'Alright. About the training. I'm not giving up coffee.'

Raph rolled his eyes, 'Whatever.'

* * *

Raph was finishing the last touches on their dinner with Leo when Jay suddenly came rushing into the kitchen. Over the course of the week the girl was here a couple of times now and Raph starting to grow use to it. Still, he only ever said _hi_ to her, but he forced himself to stay in the room when she came and actually was interested about the whole mind reading thing.

She was wearing her coat which was weird because it wasn't that cold in the sewer thanks to Donnie's heater but the look on her face told Raph that something was wrong.

Leo looked at her for a moment before he must have read her mind (which apparently was now a normal thing for them) and said, 'Nicole.'

It was almost enough for Raph to let the spoon fall to the ground, but he held it as Jay nodded, 'I'm sorry. I hate to do this, but she...people always leave her.'

It was like she slapped Raph with those word.

'I don't want to be like that. She's all alone and-I'm sorry.'

Leo walked to her and put his hands on her shoulders smiling at her softly, 'It's okay. You're a good friend.'

She smiled and tiptoes to kiss him which was a bit easier with the high boots. Raph turned around. It was Christmas Eve and Leo asked if it was okay if he invited Jay saying that she and her mom weren't speaking at the moment. Apparently not even the pretty blonde who everyone was crazy about had a perfect life. Jay went to say goodbye to the others and Leo went to take her outside.

Raph felt a mixture of anger and sadness. _People always leave her._ That sounded cruel. Very cruel. But given the way Nicole spoke about her parents who let her do whatever she wanted and how people immediately focus on Jay when she entered the room it could apply to her fair enough. Didn't he leave her as well? His mind went back to the text message from her. She asked how he was. She asked. She texted and he was supposed to text back, but he never did.

The processed with the Christmas dinner and everything. It was fun and cosy like always. Master Splinter looked happy and for once Donnie looked restful. Maybe his dreams finally ended on a happy note.

Leo nudged him a bit at one point, 'Thanks for being so okay with Jay around and not saying anything that she left.'

'It's okay. If it's for a friend, it's always a good call. She's a nice girl.'

Leo nodded, 'Listen, I just want you know that if it was the other way around. I would be okay with it too.'

Raph blinked, 'What...what got you to say that?'

Leo shrugged, 'Just... you know Mikey has a crush on his game friend, and Donnie has been talking about Kim and checking up on her nonstop. I just...until I met Jay I never would have imagine there was a girl out there who would be okay with...well us furthermore wanted to have relationship with us. Then there was the girl who didn't scream in the alley and Kim. Maybe...maybe all of us could meet someone and be happy. I just want you to know that if you find someone like that for yourself I will be supportive no matter what, alright?'

'I think you had a bit too much of that eggnog.'

Leo rolled his eyes and returned to the TV. They were watching the Christmas Carrot as tradition. Still he couldn't help, but wonder.

* * *

She stepped from one foot to another not entirely sure what the hell was she doing in front of the hospital. She should just called and say she changed her mind. Instead she looked up and spotted Jay rushing toward her through the empty sidewalk. It was Christmas so most of the people were already somewhere home or at parties or whatever.

'Hi,' she said her voice breaking a bit, but Jay just hugged her in an instant not letting her go or say anything else. Nicole let out a startled breath and hugged her back finally feeling all those feelings she was holding back sinking in.

'T-thanks...thanks for coming. I don't know...I don't know, I just was on my way to Jill's and I remembered this stupid one time at the committee where Kim talked about Christmas and how it was her favourite holiday and I just...I don't know? I couldn't ask Jill because she has her brother and she gets upset when people talk about Kim and just I don't know.'

'It's fine. Uh, her parents said they were having a Christmas dinner. They asked if I wanted to stop by, but I didn't feel okay with that,' said Jay as she pulled away.

'So she's all alone. On Christmas?' asked Nicole nodding to the hospital.

'Well, she doesn't have to be. We're here,' said Jay and took her hand leading her to the hospital. They had to be quiet and sneaky, but with Jay being Jay and Nicole having to sneak into clubs and parties before she had a fake ID it was quite easy.

As Kim's hospital bed finally came the Nicole sort of tuned Jay and her covering up the sheets and closing the door out. All she was focused on was the insane amount of wires sticking out of Kim.

'She's so...still,' said Nicole.

Jay nodded, 'Yeah, she's hasn't woken up yet. Doctor said the worst is over. She's stabile, but they're worried about the coma.'

Nicole nodded and watched Kim's chest move up and down with her slow and small breaths.

Jay put down her coat and Nicole did the same. They carefully put the chairs closer to Kim as they sat down next to her.

'Uh, I went to Taco Bell's. I figured we could eat something while we're here,' said Nicole sort of shyly. She still couldn't fully accept that this was how Kim looked like. Powerless lying on a bed during Christmas, her favourite holiday.

Jay nodded, 'Sounds good, Nicole.'

She waved her hand and handed her one.

'See, Kim, Nicole has a heart and is actually a bit softy,' said Jay and smirked at her.

The Latina opened her mouth shocked before she realized Jay was actually talking to Kim. 'You think she can-'

'Her parents think so, and so do doctors and the nurse. Maybe not like fully hear and understand, but she must hear a bit of voices. It might help to calm her.'

'Yeah, I'm sure, my voice is the calming one, Jay.'

The blonde rolled her eyes, 'Still you came. That counts for something, Nicole.'

The Latina nodded before she looked down at her sleeping girl again, 'I hope it doesn't hurt...you. I hope it's like when you're asleep and the world just goes only it's night and your asleep so you don't think you're missing out on much,' she said feeling a bit awkward but Jay smiled at her encouraging her.

'Anyway, Merry Christmas, Kim. If you would want to do some Christmas Miracle waking up now would be you know a really great one.'

Jay chuckled, 'Yeah, that would really give you a new perspective about faith and religion. You should try to bargain. No more hook-ups if Kim wakes up.'

Nicole grimaced for a moment before she actually said, 'Well, for what it's worth if you would wake up, I would do it.'

Jay was surprised, 'Or maybe you know, just no more random hook-ups until I find a decent guy? Assuming a guy like that is even real.'

'You're talking about hottie who let you down?' asked Jay, 'The stranger?'

Nicole shrugged her shoulders, 'I still don't get it. I mean...I get that guys are pigs and I was never the one to believe in the whole I will call you and we should do it again. I never wanted it either. I just...I just did what felt good and moved on. With David it was good because we were on the same page, until...until I met this guy. He's...different. I never met anyone like him, but he caught my interest somehow and I couldn't get rid of this feeling that I wanted to meet him again and find out what he was all about. So I did and again and I could feel there was chemistry between us. I...it's hard to explain, but in my eyes people are either too much jackass or not enough for me. Like I can't be with a sweet guy and I don't want to. I want someone who knows I'm a bitch and is a bit of a bitch too, but who's also...a bit of a heart. Like I don't,' she chuckled, 'I can't explain it, but this guy...he felt like that. He felt like he was an asshole, but also the good guy and I'm just drawn to it. They we had sex and I made it clear it was for fun, which I wanted, but I wanted to meet him again and again for fun and to hung out, but he completely ghost me. I guess he wasn't all that good. I wouldn't care if we never hang out again, but just the acknowledgement that it matter would be enough. Because when we had sex I was sure it rocked his world. He was just so...stunned, taken by everything and he touched me like he cared, but now he didn't even answer my stupid text and he knows where I live and hung out. It's clear he just doesn't care,' said Nicole without even realizing it. Maybe she was just still high from earlier or something.

Jay moved her chair and hugged her again, 'Then he's an asshole who doesn't deserve you and should just rot in hell. You're just so awesome and great. If he can't see it, why do you care for him so much?'

'I don't know,' said Nicole and shook her head, 'I was with David the other night and we were dancing and parting like old times, and then we were making out, and it meant nothing. I didn't feel anything,' Nicole sighed and leaned away, 'David used to be that guy. He would just turn me on all the time and it was almost like we were dating but knew we could hook up with other people. It was good for the both of us, but _this_ guy made me feel like no guy _ever_.'

Jay titled her head, 'It sounds like you're in love with this guy.'

'Please,' said Nicole instantly, 'As far as I would go is I have a crush on him.'

'Did you really not feel anything with David?'

'Honestly? I haven't felt anything worth feeling since that guy,' said Nicole before she looked at Kim and said, 'I kissed him and then he pissed me off and left calling me a whore. I was a bit of a bitch to him to, but the point is I met Matt. Kim's Matt, and we made out in his car. Ever since then I sort of have this...moments when kissing anyone just feels wrong and I have to stop. It's like a block or whatever and well then I met him again, and I kiss him and there is no problem, I can't explain it.'

She finally looked at Jay to take it all in. The blonde had a blank face for a moment before she sighed, 'You made out with Matt.'

'Yeah.'

'Kim doesn't know,' said Jay and Nicole rolled her eyes, 'I'm pretty sure that since they're still together she doesn't.'

Jay crossed her arms, 'I knew he was a dick. It's like almost every guy is one way or another.'

'True that,' said Nicole and looked at Kim, 'I'm sorry I'm not a decent enough person to not kiss taken guys. I'm sorry I didn't have the guts to tell you sooner. For what it's worth nothing else happened and I can tell he still loves _you_. It didn't mean anything. We were high and drunk, and I kissed him first so...'

Jay shook her head, 'But you said you made out. So he had to kiss you back, right?'

Nicole sighed, 'Sometimes it means nothing Jay. It's just being drunk or having a bad day or-'

Jay shook her head again, 'Nicole, you, you were drunk or high, I get that well not really, but it wasn't like you promised Kim anything or were her friend, but Matt has a girlfriend who thinks the world of him. If Kim knew that he even for a second thought about cheating on her and that he actually did so and now lies about it?'

'Maybe he told her? What do I know? I'm not friends with him or her for that matter.'

'But you feel guilty about it?'

'Liquid washes that away,' said Nicole, but she didn't believe it either, 'It's just whatever really.'

'No, it's not.'

'Okay, fine, it's not, but what can I do? I...I'm sorry, okay? I'm sorry I'm not perfectly great in everything which has something to do with moral like you are. I'm sorry I'm such a colossal mess.'

Jay looked at Kim again, 'I think every single person in the world is a bit of a mess, and I never wanted you to be the good girl, Nicole. You're my friend. I love you no matter what, but hope you plan to come clean with Kim.'

Nicole sighed, 'If she heard me, I just did.'

Jay gave her the look and Nicole groaned, 'Alright, when she wakes up I will tell her, but you should know it's causing a bit of dilemma since I want her to wake up and yet sort of not so soon.'

Jay rolled her eyes at her and Nicole said, 'Kidding. Kidding. You better wake up Kim so I can see if I can take on a Church girl.'

'Nicole,' chuckled Jay before she took her hand, 'You're not a terrible person. Just so you know.'

'Well, I'm not a good person.'

Jay looked into her brown eyes, 'Good enough, Nicole.'

'Sorry, if I'm cutting your Christmas with your boyfriend short,' said the Latina after a moment of looking into each other eyes.

'It's okay, you're my best friend after all.'

Nicole smiled at that. At times like this. It was incredibly easy to forget all her fear and just love Jay. Just be happy to be Jay's friend and not care about the rest of the world because really if someone as good and incredibly as Jay wants to be a friend with you, it should be enough.

They finished their food and went to leave. Just as they were about to leave Nicole caught a glimpse of the purple fabric tied around Kim's shoulder, but she forgot about it the moment the doors closed.

Jay stayed with her for most of the Christmas Eve even went to sleep to her house. Her mom had taken off somewhere with her friends. She didn't even ask if Nicole wanted to come. However, in the morning Nicole got a call from Yolanda apparently they had to cut their trip short and asked her if she wanted to come. Jay was fine with going to her boyfriend's now so they parted.

* * *

Raph woke up sooner than anyone for once since he felt the need to use to bathroom. It was unlike that he wake up this early but apparently the urge not to pee in the bed was just too strong. As he was going back to his room he heard someone was coming to the lair and saw Jay returning. She looked like she woke up just a couple a minutes ago and when she saw him she waved at him a bit.

'Merry Christmas.'

'You too, uh, your friend is alright?' he asked hoping he didn't sound too eager.

She nodded, 'She's okay. Her father returned home so we agreed she would go spent time with him. Her parents are divorced and her mom is well like mine complicated.'

Raph nodded. He figured as much, 'Still you're a good friend. Going to be with her.'

Jay shrugged her shoulder while unbuttoning her coat, 'She's my best friend. We...we fell apart a bit for a while, but I still care for her and I realized that just because being alone works for me it doesn't have to for everyone. It always blows up and hurt the ones you don't want to hurt at all.'

'What do you mean?'

'Well, when _you_ try to isolate yourself you also rob the others of being with you which leads them to be the ones _isolated_. I never actually realized it until I started to hang out with people again. It was a pretty selfish thing to do,' she looked away and grimaced, 'Very Ice queen like.'

'Ice queen?'

'That's what they call me in school. Ice queen since I look like I'm too good for others,' she started to walk to the couch.

'Well, from how you rushed to help you friend and helped us decorate and stuff you didn't look too good to us,' he said and followed her.

'What can I say high school's a bitch,' she said and sat down brushing her hair a bit, 'I guess teenager just have thins way of taking things too close to the heart and being too self-centred. Me too, but I can see things from a different perspective too now.'

'So this friend...what's up with her?'

Jay looked like she thought about it a bit, 'I think she feels judged like all girls do, but in a way that she's not good enough not too good for something.'

Raph awkwardly crossed his arms. Did Jay know how she was making Nicole feel sometimes?

'I think she feels alone like me, but when I want to stay the hell away from everyone, she tries to find herself in the attention and the people. A lot of times wrong people, but she's a good person. She just gets left behind a lot...by me too.'

Jay shook her head, 'It shouldn't matter what someone is going through. They shouldn't cut people out like that. In the end they will only hurt them more than if they didn't.'

He wished she wouldn't say that. He really wished she wouldn't say _that_.

Jay went for the kitchen, 'Coffee?'

'Sure,' he said looking at the blonde and wondering if he pushing Nicole for her or his own benefit now.


End file.
